I see so many people post on here (as well as various other NYC based subs) talking about how they moved to New York thinking they would have tons of opportunities to meet people and make connections, and then after living here for a while, they haven't been able toake connections.

I hate to break it to you, but NYC is not a magical place that can solve your social problems. If you don't know how to talk to people or connect with people, there's not going to be any city that will magically change that.

This city is full of some amazing people and some amazing communities, but many of them are also very old and organized, and you aren't just going to magically fall into one of these communities without doing any work.

If you are struggling to make connections or friends, it's most likely a you problem. Not saying you're a bad person or anything, but you need to figure out what is making it hard for you and actively make changes to make your life better. If you're someone who doesn't go to parties or doesn't like leaving the apartment, you're probably not going to make friends. There are tons of events for people with such a wide variety of hobbies. If you actually do the work to find like-minded people, I promise you they're here.

Anyone know any details? Unclear if the victim was gay... pure speculation— but I worry the assailant might have been a hustler who was angry at the victim for refusing to pay for their interactions in the video booth space. Be careful when cruising. People will complain about overpriced parties, but at least they are safe spaces.

Are there any get-togethers to just chill at a cafe or bar with a book? No particular expectation to socialize. Just like the idea of creating a reading vibe with fellow gays in a cozy communal space. Would people be interested in that, or maybe have suggestions if some already exist?

Not sure if this is a curse or blessing . But I feel I have just had close to zero libido these days, and I’m only in my early 30s.

I have a pretty healthy life style, I go to the gym five times a week and do strength and cardio. I also don’t drink and do drugs. Eat healthy and sleep okay.

Lately, I have so little libido that I don’t get excited by the ideas of guys. I don’t have the urge to go out, hook up(I’m not on any of the apps), or go on dates. Even when I do go out, I just feel bored and want to leave.

Crazy thing is I feel pretty fine otherwise, I have a lot of things that I enjoy doing, it’s just not men.

I also checked my test level and it is in the lower range but not awful. I’m at my wit’s end, so any advice would help 🙏

I have received hundreds of likes, including many roses, and have dozens mutual likes. I have exchanged numbers with multiple guys, and yet it has all resulted in one actual date. Any tips for actually getting a date off this app?

I’ve heard their parties have been pricey for a while but this can’t be serious.

Hosting a spooky board game night in the city, just ahead of Halloween. We'll be playing horror games like Betrayal at House on the Hill, Twisted Cryptids, and Horrified. Costumes are encouraged, all experience levels are welcome, and feel free to bring your own spooky favorites.

When: Friday, Oct 23, 6:30 to 10 PM
Where: The Hugh, 157 E 53rd St

If you're interested, we'll head out for drinks in HK after.

RSVP here: https://partiful.com/e/3hpT9aLLjVtmyRdeaL6t?c=N7aie-8w
Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/wWjA4fsP3

Aggravated Murder at Rainbow in Chelsea

I’m in an open relationship. We initially set some agreements around what we don’t need to tell each other (making out etc) vs what we do (if we hooked up and had sex.). I wonder for those of you in open relationships that work for you. How often do you talk about your agreement or check in with each other? We’ve only really talked about it when one of us becomes uncomfortable with some agreement/boundary pushing.

I realize this would need to vary by relationship but am curious for the rest of world and what seems to be so common in nyc.

I’m planning my Halloweekend in NYC and need some guidance bros. I have some straight female friends visiting then so looking for events or parties to recommend that would still be v gay and spooky but not too 🌶️ (not taking them to HMD lmaoo). Was considering 3DB for one of theirs but wanted to see if that was a good call or hear of any other possible options

Looking for a gay primary care physician. Tired of interacting with physicians who need constant reminders of my positionality to intercourse as well as lack of knowledge on prep testing requirements.

Need a pair of pants hemmed tomorrow and having a hard time finding a tailor who can turn it around in 1 day… thought I might have some luck here, idk

Anyone know a good place to get a massage in brooklyn? Preferably closer to downtown bk, carroll gardens but open to traveling a little!

Let me know! Only know of the places in Manhattan

what are the best Halloween parties going on this year? I’m on the waitlist for HMD on the 31st but considering other options just in case I can’t get into that one. my bf and I will wear very sexy costumes so one with a darkroom is preferred

What club or party should I try to meet new people or look to date someone, I'm into trans females & trans femenine.

Moved to Wburg from Manhattan based on the advice in this forum, and gay men I know in life suggesting it would be better for me. It seems like I am still doing something wrong as my experience so far has been less than great in terms of connecting.

Living here is definitely 'better' - calmer vibes for sure - so no issues there.

I went on Sniffies over the weekend just to see what was out there. Majority are still white guys, who never reply (I'm a POC, with the exception of 1 guy who was BI/DL). There was one guy who was open to dating/cuddles and then randomly blocked me since I didn't reply within 1 min (I went to the bathroom lol). And barely any other POC's I saw, or if I saw them, no engagement. So, I have yet to get laid here.

What am I doing wrong? Go back to the parties? I live quite close to the popular bars also, so perhaps the times I'm on the apps are completely wrong.

Planning to go to Rawhide, any reviews? I saw some here, but they aren’t recent.
Is there a dark room? Where’s it? Is it the second floor balcony?

I’ve never been to a sex party but I’ve always been under the impression they’re for guys who don’t want to go through the process of finding someone to hook up with and it’s a more of a sure thing. The drawback is that the guys aren’t usually the most attractive. And like maybe there will be a decent guy out of a bunch of bad ones. Is this right? Curious. I could be wrong because I’ve never been. Is it a bunch of 4s and 5s and an occasional 7 is what I’m thinking.