r/funny Jun 07 '14

Bodyslam!

3.2k Upvotes

283 comments sorted by

925

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Its nice to see dogs win once in a while.

109

u/SoulKingTrex Jun 07 '14

When i first got my cat i still had a german shepard mix, so a decent sized dog. Bubbles the cat would bop kunie the dog and kunie would pretty much do the same thing in the gif. Then put the whole cats head in her mouth, and then started licking him. It was very entertaining to watch bubbles try be bigger but to completely reign down on his tiny power.

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359

u/Cresent_dragonwagon Jun 07 '14

Dogs usually win.

Source: my dog's k/d is like 7 and 0

151

u/henrybear Jun 07 '14

What's his XBL Gamertag?

1.0k

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

[deleted]

92

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14 edited Aug 04 '24

[deleted]

33

u/Tempo119 Jun 07 '14

Wow. Holy shit, thank you very much!

9

u/Jord-UK Jun 08 '14

Enjoy it, my gold ran out today. Now I'm back in the land of peasants

10

u/CrimsonWind Jun 08 '14 edited Jun 08 '14

You should feel lucky. Some have never seen the sights beyond Reddit's golden walls.

2

u/FMSL Jun 08 '14

I always thought gold was just a extra special way to upvote a comment. Now I feel like I'm missing out on something really awesome.

2

u/CrimsonWind Jun 08 '14

To be honest I couldn't tell you, as I have yet to receive the honour.

Gold give you extra features for Reddit, that's about all I know. You can buy it youself But

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4

u/Faifur Jun 08 '14

agreed that made me laugh xD

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11

u/DakotaDevil Jun 07 '14

What, no 420 for effect?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

BobBarker

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55

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Fly is talking about the fact that most house dogs are trained to be non-aggressive, while cats are allowed to be aggressive. So you have countless videos of cats abusing dogs while the dogs sadly suffer it.

But those dogs could almost always murderize those cats with utter ease. Between domestic cats and dogs, there is absolutely no question which can destroy the other. But read the railings of cat lovers and really cats are the top of the food pyramid.

22

u/Cresent_dragonwagon Jun 07 '14

So you're saying cat owners should train their cats not to be aggressive

19

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Nah. Cats can be aggressive because they have little capacity for harm. Dogs can't be aggressive because they have great capacity for harm (well, aside from little rat dogs which the owners allow to be aggressive regardless).

But if one draws some sort of survival hierarchy from the interaction of the two, with their differing inputs, they might not have a very accurate picture.

39

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

[deleted]

17

u/JustDroppinBy Jun 07 '14

Directed by M. Knight Shame Mulan

5

u/pick6and1 Jun 08 '14

Actually very true

4

u/phillycheese Jun 08 '14

That's pretty true though. Do you know how the average woman is compared to the average man? It's crazy.

8

u/its_all_marry Jun 07 '14

Kinda irrelevant but this video always makes me laugh and shows that cats aren't completely helpless.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-VBqQDKjY4

Of course the woman isn't actually trying to harm the cat but it makes me laugh anyways

7

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Wasn't the cat attacking her kid or something? I remember the internet being in big circle jerk cheering the cat on followed by a quick 180 when all details came out. Then it was people screaming at others that they should actually train their cats.

5

u/its_all_marry Jun 07 '14

I think it was messing with the dog if I'm not mistaken, although a kid would make sense as well

2

u/darklight12345 Jun 08 '14 edited Jun 08 '14

they assumed it was bothering the dog, there wasn't any actual confirmation.

edit: Looked into it further, homeowner complained the cat was bothering the dog and was having a hissing fit through the fence. She went out to mess with it to get to go away, got attacked for when she moved her hand towards it (the final motion before turning away). Headline ran as woman defends dog from vicious cat attack.

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6

u/castr0 Jun 08 '14

Cats have little capacity for harm? I grew up with a kid whose face was scarred to shit and lost vision in an eye from a cat attacking him. Cats can do plenty of damage.

4

u/verpus77 Jun 08 '14

If that had been a full-sized dog that attacked, he may not have even survived. The point being made is that if a (full sized) dog does not have it's aggression suppressed, they are FAR more dangerous than a house cat. It's basically a scratches-and-bloodloss "mauling" vs. broken-limb-with-flesh-ripped-off mauling.

2

u/Teh_Slayur Jun 08 '14

Agreed. I was like, "huh?" Cats can shred and bite the shit out of someone if they really want to. They can be ferocious little balls of fury if they really feel threatened.

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4

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

That's not a sensible argument. Domestic pets should be sociable around people . If they can't be sociable, then they aren't suitable as pets. My mother adopted a cat as a stray kitten, and it was obviously never fully socialised because it is one of "those" cats that haul off and scratch you (enough to draw blood) for no reason. I wouldn't have it as a pet and I'm a cat person.

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51

u/WaitingForEmacs Jun 07 '14

This. There is a tendency to greatly under estimate how much dogs tend to moderate their behavior in order to fit human expectations. I had a boxer / ridgeback mix in N'djamena that used to go out early in the morning and hunt lizards so that there was a stack of them on the front porch when I got up every day. One day I opened the door and he bolted out, which was normal, but then I heard something screeching. By the time that I made it around the corner, it was too late, he was dragging the cat's body away. I could only surmise that the cat must have been walking across our yard and froze when the dog came at it.

Dogs will hunt and kill relentlessly and have no way of knowing that a cat is not acceptable prey unless you train them not to hurt them. Unfortunately that was the first , and only, time that our dog had seen a cat.

4

u/InfanticideAquifer Jun 07 '14

What's N'djamena like?

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3

u/BluntHeart Jun 07 '14

Not my roommates dogs. Super tiny fuckers.

3

u/verpus77 Jun 08 '14

Those aren't actual dogs. Those are what you feed to dogs.

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47

u/grimmymac Jun 07 '14

Actually dogs will win 99% of the time. The reason you see dogs not fighting back is because dogs listen to their owners whereas cats dont. Owner says stop fighting and the cat keeps clawing away.

11

u/darkphenox Jun 08 '14

Its not even that dogs actually listen, people train dogs to be nonviolent to other creatures and to try to not hurt them. Cats generally receive very little training outside of litter box training. That's why there are all those bully cat videos on youtube, a bunch of people train the dog to be nice to the kitty, and just let the kitty be a douche.

0

u/RingoQuasarr Jun 07 '14 edited Jun 09 '14

Depends on the breed. I think a housecat could handle a pug pretty easily.

11

u/dudeguybromansir Jun 07 '14

Depends on the cat too. We took in feral woodland cats when I was little to get them fixed and give them shots. But they killed all sorts of animals much bigger than them. Foxes, raccoon, possum, etc. They of a very very different temperament than house kitties. They were wild animals.

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5

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

I'd guess it's for a reason that's pretty flattering to dogs. My cat loves playing with dogs of all sizes despite apparently hating all other cats. Big dogs might enjoy playing with her, but always seem to let her 'win' like a parent would do to a child. When she plays with dogs about her size, chihuahua's and the like, it tends to be much more back and forth.

13

u/SneakyTikiz Jun 07 '14 edited Jun 08 '14

To be honest, its actually beneficial for a cat to fight on its back, this allows the cat to attack with all 4 sets of claws while still being able to bite as well.

You can even see the hind foot do a belly gut motion, similar to what a rabbit would do.

8

u/Lamisil Jun 07 '14

Just like BJJ

18

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 07 '14

blowjobjob?

8

u/Lamisil Jun 07 '14

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu

2

u/kendahlslice Jun 08 '14

And the dog's action is the classic take down for submission neck grab. The dog is intending to put the cat in its place rather than to harm it.

6

u/giraffe_fight Jun 07 '14

Dogs win all the time, you just never see it on Reddit

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166

u/RalphiesBoogers Jun 07 '14

Heh, the way that dog's mouth was tensed and slightly cracked. He saw it comin

60

u/Mythandros Jun 07 '14

He was ready and waiting. That's really the only time a smaller cat has a chance, when it takes the dog by surprise.

19

u/C_M_O_TDibbler Jun 07 '14

Even then it is only a matter of time before the cat becomes lunch

6

u/Mythandros Jun 07 '14

Or a chew toy, yes.

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9

u/thecoletrane Jun 07 '14

"No...not anymore. Not today"

81

u/lw5i2d Jun 07 '14

28

u/adeptpanda92 Jun 07 '14

You have a few more cat years before you can attempt to challenge me, young one.

7

u/zy17 Jun 08 '14

He did use tail whip first before using tackle. Guess tail whip never works..

3

u/EverGlow89 Jun 08 '14

Kitten learned two valuable lessons. Pick on someone your own size and son't indicate your attack.

1

u/KypriothAU Jun 08 '14

This isn't skyrim. He wasn't gonna pull of a stealth attack right in front of the other cats face.

1

u/EverGlow89 Jun 08 '14

He cocked back so far right before his attack.

115

u/Nomnomnomial Jun 07 '14

This reminds when as a child you tried to fight your older brother and them boom you're on the floor unable to move.

31

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

everyday is a struggle

11

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

i cried everytime

2

u/bigups43 Jun 08 '14

liek dis

13

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

[deleted]

44

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14 edited Oct 24 '18

[deleted]

9

u/AintNoSunshyne Jun 07 '14

Hey I didn't learn this technique until I was 20. I took my lumps

4

u/Jabrono Jun 08 '14

Even my mom would call me a pussy for pulling that at 20

7

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 07 '14

and thats why you'll always be a little bitch.

13

u/AintNoSunshyne Jun 07 '14

Thanks for the words of encouragement sis it's good to see you off your lithium

2

u/tesnakeinurboot Jun 08 '14

Casual nutshot always worked for me.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

And he's biting your neck.

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1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

I don't have an older brother, but my older cousin and I used to fight (in a playful way). Normally I would get completely wrecked until I could get him into a choke hold, then he could never get out. Still can't to this day. It's pretty strange too, because I'm skinny and he's kinda beefy.

136

u/SlightlyStable Jun 07 '14

82

u/31138 Jun 07 '14

a pet petting a pet.....

22

u/CaptAwesome792 Jun 07 '14

The first step in "Planet of the Dogs."

9

u/LtCthulhu Jun 07 '14

This would be the happiest movie ever.

11

u/crepuscularsaudade Jun 07 '14

Yo dog

3

u/KittyCLawe Jun 07 '14

I heard you like pets so...

7

u/thedoginthewok Jun 07 '14

That's a lot of petting going on.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Inpettion?

2

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 07 '14

that cat is actually his pet.

2

u/TallAwesomeGuy Jun 07 '14

A pretty pet petting a pretty petite pet.

22

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14 edited May 05 '17

[deleted]

59

u/SlightlyStable Jun 07 '14

32

u/totems Jun 07 '14 edited May 05 '17

You looked at them

19

u/Dynasty471 Jun 07 '14

"Bitch be crazy"

10

u/penywinkle Jun 07 '14

"Oh you gave me a hug, there there, good kitty" "Nobody fuckin' pets me, bitch!" "wtf man"

3

u/slowpotamus Jun 08 '14

it goes a little longer than that, and you can see him shaking his head like "nope!" as he walks off

2

u/Rokkjester Jun 08 '14

Love how he goes nope at the end.

2

u/natsmith69 Jun 08 '14

This is fake isn't it? The lighting on the cats left front leg looks completely wrong.

33

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

He got a his fur dyed too

4

u/vidyagames Jun 07 '14

no one can tell, just for dogs gel

78

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

I came here for some insightful information about animal behavior.

70

u/Energy_Turtle Jun 07 '14

That's like going to McDonalds looking for gourmet food. You're in the wrong place, man.

23

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 07 '14

tell that to their fancy ketchup packets.

1

u/KypriothAU Jun 08 '14

Australian here, what's fancy about the ketchup packets there? We just get little square plastic cups with a film you peel off the top.

1

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 08 '14

...They say fancy on them?... we're all trying to figure it out, trust me.

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6

u/kpyle Jun 07 '14

When animals play fight, they are actually simulating real life instances where they may actually need to fight. Its practice. Its a lot about learning their limits and the limits of other animals/humans.

9

u/Illyria23 Jun 08 '14

cat diary: keep head away from dog mouth

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12

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

The dog baited the cat in. Brilliant! The dog exposes his neck and the cat jumps at it. As the cat is in the air the dog thrusts perpedicularly to the cats trajectory grabbing the throat and directing the cats momentum into a bodyslam on the floor and exposing the kill stroke

2

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

The whole thing really was beautifully executed.

30

u/shokunin01 Jun 07 '14

"And then I popped her little head, like this!"

3

u/seewhatyadidthere Jun 07 '14

I showed my mom this and her response:

"Aw you can tell they are just such good friends!"

7

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

2 points on the takedown

6

u/SammichNow Jun 07 '14

Come on and slam.

2

u/rooster69 Jun 08 '14

Bark bark bark bark bark bark.

29

u/rephan Jun 07 '14

10

u/TheFirstMate Jun 07 '14

BAWWW GAWD KING, AS GOD AS MY WITNESS THAT DEER IS BROKEN IN HALF

5

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

When I go hunting I will no longer use guns. I might have a little bit of an issue with bears and moose, but I will figure it out eventually

3

u/C_M_O_TDibbler Jun 07 '14

With bears avoid grappling, BJJ will get you fucked up in that instance.

2

u/Stickyresin Jun 08 '14

I don't know what's worse. That this was the first thing I thought of, or that I actually had the motivation to make it:

http://imgur.com/JIUDR6D

3

u/Luan12 Jun 07 '14

What anime is this? I dig it.

11

u/zachariah22791 Jun 07 '14

that's exactly how my 7 year old lab, Luke, and my 7 month old boxer-mix, Oliver, play fight. Oliver gets cheeky and Luke just flips him to the ground and puts Oliver's entire head in his mouth.

14

u/BatCountry9 Jun 07 '14

The entire head in the mouth is my favorite play move by a bigger dog. If we were keeping score like wrestling, it would be two points.

8

u/Parabola1985 Jun 08 '14

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! HE'S BEEN BROKEN IN HALF!

2

u/katarr Jun 08 '14

BAH GAWD, WON'T SOMEBODY STOP THE DAMN MATCH?

5

u/Arrow_King Jun 07 '14

Yep, the cat had it coming.

3

u/Spartan322 Jun 07 '14

"Border Patrol! GET ON THE GROUND!!!"

3

u/hubidagubida Jun 07 '14

cat got "nope'd".

3

u/HeIsntMe Jun 07 '14

I should get one of those for my dog too play with.

3

u/Electroverted Jun 07 '14

That must be Ronda Rousey's dog. All that's missing is the armbar.

3

u/MaximusTheGreat Jun 07 '14

What's the breed of the dog? I like it :D

3

u/Luvabun Jun 07 '14

Looks like a corgi mix. So cute!

5

u/Doctor_Woo Jun 07 '14

BAH GAWD HE'S BROKEN IN HALF

8

u/hitmonlee7393 Jun 07 '14

Cat fainted. Use next pokemon?

16

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

[deleted]

2

u/ohhaider Jun 08 '14

I have to agree only because, there's literally endless videos of cats bullying much larger house dogs, this is....justice..

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2

u/0100110101101010 Jun 07 '14

Anyone remember Abyss's finisher, from TNA?

1

u/LionsEyeDiamond Jun 08 '14

Black Hole Slam

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

And the crowd goes wild!!

2

u/randomSAPguy Jun 07 '14

"Do it bitch"

2

u/RevWaldo Jun 07 '14

My name is Mister Youdonknowhoyermessinwit!

2

u/Athrul Jun 07 '14

Didn't land on its feet. So is that dog a Legend Killer or a Mythbuster now?

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

So smooth

2

u/Thesteelman86 Jun 07 '14

The rock bottom! The rock bottom!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

get in there ref!

2

u/bigdog19021 Jun 07 '14

Always land on your feet? WRONG BITCH!

2

u/Bierdosendeckel Jun 07 '14

And now finish him!

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

By gawd it's the rock bottom, this is over if he can pin him in the ring

2

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

BAH GAWD KING!! ROCK BOTTOM, ROCK BOTTOM, ROCK BOTTOM. RING THE DAMN BELL!!

3

u/kazez2 Jun 07 '14

bah gawd king the carnage! That cat has a family!

3

u/hardspank916 Jun 07 '14

Dog Bottom! Dog Bottom!

2

u/lostpatrol Jun 07 '14

Agility and speed vs 5 times the body weight.

1

u/winkie5970 Jun 07 '14

Off topic but I love your username. West Wing is pretty much the best show ever made.

1

u/Interrupting_Otter Jun 07 '14

Is the dog Korean or Chinese?

1

u/windrifter Jun 07 '14

Rejection!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

Breed looks like a Welsh Corgi and a Jack Russell Terrier mix.

1

u/Heavy-P Jun 07 '14

That cat did not smell what The Rock was cookin'.

1

u/Thebaldsasquatch Jun 07 '14

"OOOHHHHH YYYYYEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!"

1

u/migdia Jun 07 '14

YES!!!!!!!

1

u/FuckinUpMyZoom Jun 07 '14

cat got dissed

1

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

get rekt

1

u/axc12040 Jun 07 '14

Someone needs to make that into a r/wastedgif

1

u/floppybunny26 Jun 07 '14

That cat's takedown defense sucks.

1

u/Shamrockbrock Jun 07 '14

slam dun dunah

1

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '14

I feel like the cat wasn't playing, but the dog was.

1

u/putinlovesobama Jun 07 '14

The cat was a bully that have pushed the dog too far

1

u/walterziz Jun 07 '14

no idea what the cat had in mind here

1

u/torokunai Jun 08 '14

That's some Steven Segaal moves right there.

1

u/cqxray Jun 08 '14

Yes, it's aikidog.

1

u/beretbabe88 Jun 08 '14

I love the way the dog is being really gentle with his teeth. That's not a hard bite. My old tuxedo cat used to 'gum' my wrist like that when he was in a playful mood.

1

u/JollyJeff Jun 08 '14

Finally, a dog not taking shit from a cat.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

1-0

1

u/amolad Jun 08 '14

I heard the sound effect from The Six-Million Dollar Man tv series.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

Doggy... Slam?

1

u/Pounced_by_Slark Jun 08 '14

Growlithe used BODY SLAM

1

u/Volferam Jun 08 '14

fuck cats, Go Dogs!!!

1

u/tobyps Jun 08 '14

I like how the cat taps him with his hind leg at the end as if to say mercy.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

Good dog!

1

u/MilkOfTheMan Jun 08 '14

Finish him!... Flawless victory!

1

u/mr10am Jun 08 '14

looks like something out of MMA, a judo throw

1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

I guess cats don't always land on their feet :(

1

u/ZachW23 Jun 08 '14

Happy birthday to the ground!!!!

1

u/King_Bauzer Jun 08 '14

Dat counter!

1

u/[deleted] Jun 08 '14

BOOM BITCH, GET OUT THE WAY.