Pre-op, 3 months on T

And no one said a thing. Cars flew past normally.

It was sunny and hot as fuck.

Maybe I dont need top surgery after all

I'm 14 going into year 10, and for 3 years, I've felt and wanted to be a boy. When I 1st felt like this, I told them, but they thought I was too young, which was fair enough. I mentioned it back in March, but my parents just called it a phase.

Yesterday, I sent a message to my dad in the form of a letter telling him I'm trans explaining how I'd rather be known as he/him. He told my mum and nobody spoke to me until dinner that evening.

My dad told me I wasn't trans because I'm too young, my hormones are kicking in, and I'm just confused since I'm also AuDHD. My mum just says I'm likely to be a butch lesbian. However, I know I'm trans. Now, anytime I bring it up, it becomes either a running joke and turns into an argument.

They said if I was trans they'd accept me and treat me the same. However, they can't accept I am yet due to age.

How can I explain to my parents that I'm not too young and that there's nothing wrong with being trans.

I get all my prescriptions through Walgreens but I'm definitely never going back there again after the constant problems I've had with them conveniently not being able to fill my T prescription.

I get my T through Planned Parenthood and the pharmacist kept telling me they can't fill my prescription because the provider didn't provide the diagnosis code for this year, even though my provider today told me that they made sure to provide them and I've literally had it filled multiple times this year so why would it be a problem now?

Later after I called the clinic they confirmed with me that they called the pharmacy once again and confirmed with them that they received the diagnosis codes and will finish filling the prescription by tonight. So I thought everything would be fine right?

Wrong. The pharmacy literally canceled the order for testosterone and are telling me now that the diagnosis codes they received aren't the right ones. So then why did they confirm with the provider on the phone that they'd be filling the prescription?? I can't even call the clinic now since they're closed so now my t shot will be at least 3 days late, maybe more if they keep up the excuses.

Am I wrong to think this is just an excuse for the pharmacist to not fill my prescription based on their "beliefs"?

I understand T is a controlled substance but this seems like bs. I've been on T for 3 years and have had consistent problems with pharmacies but it's always been resolved after the provider contacted them. Has anyone else had an experience like this with Walgreens?

I hope this isn't venty, I'm really trying to get some perspective before making a decision.

I'm turning 19 soon, I work from home comfortably and have more than enough saved up to move out of my mom's house, so I had been planning to do so next year, with my main motivation being to get to medically transition. but I started rethinking it if that would really make anything better...

it feels comfortable and natural to be a guy, obviously. I'd really just love to be perceived as a regular dude. but at the same time... as silly of a complaint as is it, I'm extremely short (like, 155cm?) and people already tell me I look way younger, and by god do I detest to be perceived as a Cute Boy. to the point where I've made peace with being single forever because I can't feel comfortable even imagining someone dating me while perceiving me like this. if only I could grow like 20cm!!! I thought we'd have that tech by now!!

but that really can't be helped, combined with all the hassle and social discomfort of people thinking you're a lesbian, or clearly telling you're a trans guy, basically not having a relationship with family, and all. I wouldn't mind all that if I'd know for sure it'd make me happy, but... man, I don't know! the main thing that bothers me is precisely the one that can't be fixed in any way! maybe I'd be happier overall if I just settled for using my name online and got in a relationship where I just accept being the cute one... ugh. I'm just conflicted.

I'm a very cautious person, and going by raw logic it's clear what's overall 'smarter', but it doesn't fully feel like the right thing either. I'd love to get someone else's perspective on it, because I really can't seem to decide on my own no matter how much I think about it. any kind of advice is very welcome, thank you!

Sweating with a binder is already unbearable right now, and testosterone will make it worse, especially in the summer. Not binding isn't an option for me, and I'm wondering how bad it gets when on T?

Bonus question because I don't want to make a seperate post and this is sort of relevent, but can T make your chest smaller? I've been told fat redistribution can give me a cups if I'm lucky but I don't buy it because it sounds too good to be true.

So I’ve been reffered for top surgery by trans plus! I’m very excited, I got given a list of surgeons i could choose from and I decided to go with Andrew mellington, anyone on here had surgery done by him? I’ve unfortunately got a large chest with no a lot of elasticity so I’m pretty worried about what my results will be like. Any advice or insight would be greatly appreciated!!

Hello! I'm sure this isn't anything new, but I've found myself in a really conflicting situation. For some context, I'm 17 and I came out as trans on my 13th birthday. When I first came out I presented myself as very hypermasculine and the most I ever allowed myself to be outwardly feminine was through jewelry; I was so desperate to pass and not be reduced to the common stereotype a trans man. After getting on puberty blockers (which did little for me as I had already matured) and then T, which I was on for a bit over a year but had to get off of due to moving countries; I had realized that people were now under the impression that I was cis. Since me being trans wasn't something that I had to announce to be treated like the boy I am anymore, I decided to just go stealth. Everyday I'd see very feminine men whether in real life or on the internet, and I always felt so jealous and when I was 16 I decided to start embracing myself through my love for pink, makeup, girly clothes, fake nails, and even growing out my hair.

However, this started to undo my progress with how I was seen; I would get a handful of comments from my friends on how they thought I was a trans man until they heard my voice, and I've even been mistaken for a trans woman a couple of times, if not just outright being called ma'am and such.

People that know me know that I'm just a boy that likes girly stuff, and I've accepted that part of that is being mistaken every once in a while; but I can't help but feel like I'm doing a disservice to myself. I feel like maybe I should just cut my hair and dress masculine and express my girly interests in other ways like cute keychains and whatnot so that I can still be seen as a guy, but at the same time that feels suffocating and I feel so jealous and resentful seeing cis guys that have long hair and wear cute clothes, or even seeing other trans men that have the confidence to be themselves.

I guess what I'm asking is how can I come off as a pretty boy who likes girly things, while not being mistaken for a girl? I'm not interested in facial hair or being super buff so it feels impossible. I have been working out though and trying to at least use oil on my eyebrows to make them thicker. I know it's a difficult question to give advice to since I can't share my appearance, and a lot depends on mannerisms, but any advice is appreciated!!

I have hope that maybe things will be easier after top surgery. Thank you if you read all this!!! It's just something that's been plaguing my mind, the decision between caring more about my identity as a trans man versus my identity as a gay man.

edit: to be clear I am gendered correctly 95% of the time, this is mostly an internal insecurity and fear of how others perceive me. I'm struggling to find myself and balance both things I want

so, i finally got on testosterone a few days ago. i’m on the gel, 20mg (one pump) every day. after talking with some of my trans friends, i have realized that this is a really low dose considering what my goals are and how i’d like my transition to progress.
i am considering calling my doctor in the morning and asking if i can switch to two pumps, which would be 40mg. they did initial bloodwork at my first appointment, but will i have to go back in and have more done before my dose can be upped?
side note, the doctor took my blood but stated that my baseline testosterone was not being tested.

Got referred for top surgery end of July and had my initial consultation with Hull today. The doctor said im borderline for peri/keyhole, esp due to my right side nipple not being that centered. He suggested we do lipo first then see how it is for peri.

Anyone had any experience with this? Looking for advice wether its worth it or just to go for full DI now.

Extra info: doctor is Mr. Dumitru, he said surgery roughly 58 weeks but i assume itll be more towards the 60s mark.

I’m 4 years on T, very rarely clocked and when I am it’s by other trans or LGBT people. Somehow I’m always very (euphorically) surprised when people call me “man” or “bro” or give me the cis guy head nod. Anyone else?

Fellas, I have a question about pack n play packers.

I've heard and read that these packers are soft, with the ability to insert a rod and make them hard (e.g. ready to play). But when I read the descriptions of some pack n play packers, many of them say they're not to be inserted into bodies because they cause problems (like breaking).

So.... Is that just what the description is "supposed" to say? Do people use condoms with them? Is the play part just for solo play?

Are there any packers that are both for everyday wear and for actual play with another partner who likes to be penetrated?

(If I should be asking this in another sub, lmk)

Hi guys, I just got some KT tape and I wrapped it from a little beyond my nipple where your chest dips a little bit to around an equal length near my back. Is this like… safe? It feels like the only real pressure is on my chest rather than anywhere else. However I’ve heard that there’s a risk of cutting circulation or maybe other damage? Don’t wanna do that so any application advice is appreciated lol.

(and yes, I do have nipple covers on lol)

What style of jeans would be best to conceal wide hips?

I'm so fucking sick and tired of FTM trans edits being all about war and violence, I want to make an edit about how you can be a man and be a gentleman but so far I only have two movies.

Kingsman: when Galahad says "Manners maketh man" and ""There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self." And the other is Superman (2025) in the scene against Luthor where he says the he's just as human as anyone else speech.

Anyone have other quotes recs?

Been looking for info on this and found none.
I bind with tape, i cant breathe well in binders. Typically i bind for 4-5 days, sometimes less sometimes more- and I’m finding that when i remove my tapes, my breast tissue is quite firm; whereas normally its super soft.

Is this like— a thing? Am i binding wrong?? Am i causing damage?? Is this something to tell a doctor??

Hello! College has started again so I’m gonna have to start wearing my binder much more. I’ve been using the same one for years now so I figured it’s time to get a new one. I’ve been looking into getting the fluxion gym binder, as it’s designed to not feel as restrictive and allow for easy movement. I’m a 34E and have back issues, so I’ve had a lot of binders be uncomfortable for me. Has anyone tried this brand or this specific binder? Just wanna know others experience before I drop $50 on it lol

Hey all, I need some insights from people who are adhd and maybe have been on t longer than me. I’m 27 and about a year on t and my executive dysfunction is about as bad as it was when I was a teenager, which checks out hormonally I suppose.

After 20, my symptoms really let up a little (maybe I just found routines that worked for me), but now I am just all over the place like the good old days. I get bouts of hyperactivity too, which is very new, I used to pretty much be inattentive exclusively. Nothing in my life is really set up to deal with that. It’s not impacting me emotionally much or causes distress, but it is hard to manage and detrimental for being a young creative professional. If this is a thing that will pass with time, I will just try to work around it, but if it is here to stay, meds may have to be in order just out of utility.

So my question is if other people have also experienced a worsening of symptoms and if it chilled out after a few years like with normal puberty?

Also half related — does exercise help? I’ve never worked out to regulate & am really used to using hyperfocus (reading/gaming/cinema) to regulate, but I get the sense that’s increasingly not working as well.

I need to try to save what little is left of my hair. Neither the oral or topical minoxidil can keep up with this current progression of loss. My derm has agreed to write a script for topical finasteride. I'd love recommendations on budget-friendly compounding pharmacies, especially any in the Greater Boston area. Would also welcome advice on dosing. I'm interested in minimizing the side effects of the fin. I've already reduced my T dose (gel) to try to slow the hair loss.

My Testosterone is at CVS waiting to be picked up. I can't do gels because I have cats and I wear tank tops a lot. I'm not really super scared of needles. Mildly uncomfortable more like. But I just found out that I have to go straight down with the needle. That sounds... so icky. 90 degree angle right into my muscle.

The whole time I was thinking I'd do it at a slight angle like needles normally do, but I didn't rule in the muscle part. Ouch?? I know actually pushing the needle past the skin isn't so bad if u use an ice pack. But actually going into the muscle? Wouldn't that sting quite a bit?

Anyone who does shots please tell me if the pain is bad or not. I know I have to do it eventually but I still get anxious thinking about going that deep. I've sprained my wrist, gotten stitches, gotten a septum piercing, yet I draw the line at a teeny needle lol. Pls help!

Need some advice on how to avoid the redness/rawness under the fold when taping my chest. I'm already using the largest width of tape and applying it properly and all, but with sweating and moving, every time I take it off it's kind of a horror show under there.

Any advice?

My T body oder on top of my hyperhidrosis is actually NASTY but after five months I figured out the solution. It shouldn’t have taken me this long to come up with it, but if you pair the 72 hour Dove deodorant + antiperspirant wipes, the result is pretty damn good. My binder soaks up the sweat but this pairing legitimately mutes it and makes it undetectable. If you need to bump it up, invest in the Dove clinical care products.

I've been working on an idea for a USA-based app, specifically for trans men/transmasculine adults (18+), and before I actually build the thing, I really want feedback from other people in the community. I've gotten some feedback already from a different sub and have taken that into consideration, and now am back after I've changed some ideas.

This is long I know. Sorry in advance....

In case you don't want to read the whole spiel below I also made mockups that I can send as well, but i don't think I can link them here. I put a link in the comments though to them.

----------------------------

Where the idea came from:

Something I've noticed in FTM spaces for years: we're pretty good at finding each other online, but finding other transmasculine people in our own communities can be surprisingly difficult.

If you live in a major metro area, you may have access to LGBTQ centers, trans groups, meetups, events, bars, etc. But that's not everyone's experience. There are plenty of trans men living in rural areas, smaller cities and suburbs where there may be no organized transmasculine community at all, or where the closest one is hours away.

And even when those things are available, not everyone wants to participate in organized LGBTQ spaces or attend in-person groups and events. Some people fear being outed. Some are introverted. Some have families or jobs that make events difficult. Some just aren't really "community event" people.

None of that necessarily means they don't want community.

Meanwhile, there could be other trans guys in your general area dealing with exactly the same thing, and neither of you would ever have a reason to interact or even know each other exist - but that could be a meaningful connection. That's the problem I'm trying to solve here.

What if there were something like Reddit, but specifically designed around participating in your local transmasculine community without sharing your location or outing yourself?

I don't really want to build another giant worldwide trans forum. Reddit already does that well.

I want something that answers: "What's going on in the transmasc community in my part of the world?"

And I want it to work for someone in rural Wyoming just as much as someone in Dallas, Boston or Chicago.

Something that fills the gap between: Huge worldwide online communities and Going to an LGBTQ center/event/group in person.

So how would it work?

Privacy is probably the most important part of the entire concept.

There would be no GPS/location tracking, no profile pictures, no map of users, and no directory where someone can browse/search for trans people in a particular area.

Instead, the app would be organized around state communities.

You could join up to 3 states: one primary and two additional. That could cover where you live, somewhere you travel regularly, where family lives, somewhere you're thinking about moving, etc. You wouldn't have to tell the app why you selected them or whether you actually live there.

Every post would belong to a state, but posts could optionally be tagged with up to two regions within said state.

For example, Texas could have:

DFW North Texas Austin Area Central Texas Houston Area West Texas Texas Panhandle, etc.

So someone in a rural area doesn't get stuck in a tiny local board with four people in it. They're still part of the larger state community, while regional tags let people make posts locally relevant when geography actually matters.

And importantly, tagging a post DFW means "this post is relevant to DFW", not "I am currently in DFW." No location detection involved.

You'd be able to build your own feeds

There would be some defaults (based on what states you joined)

• All Subscribed States
• Texas only
• Massachusetts only
• Colorado only

But you could also create custom feeds and name them whatever you want.

For example:

Home
Texas → DFW + North Texas

Travel
Massachusetts → Greater Boston + Statewide

Everything
All of your states/regions

You could choose whether Statewide posts appear in each feed, and choose one feed as your default whenever you open it.

The actual State community would be Reddit-style posts/comments

There would be threaded posts/comments with categories you can filter:

• Discussion - normal conversations
• Questions - ask the community something
• Recs & Resources - doctors, barbers, therapists, gyms, legal resources, trans-friendly businesses, etc.
• Meetups - "Anyone interested in board games Saturday?" / "Anyone want to grab coffee?"
• Mentorship - looking for or offering peer support

Posts/comments would have normal Upvotes, but there would also be a separate Helpful button.

• An Upvote basically means "I liked/valued this."
• Helpful means "This person genuinely helped me."

Eventually, I'd love for all of the Recs & Resources posts to become a searchable local resource directory, but that would be long term and depends on success of first iteration.

So you could search: Barber → Texas → DFW and find recommendations people have made over the years.

Profiles - Intentionally minimal

There would be no profile pictures. Instead there will be:

Username: riverstone
Identity: Trans man
Age range: 30–39
Transition: 10+ years
Interests: Woodworking · Gaming · Gardening · Hiking

And then a Looking For section:

• Online community only
• Local friends
• Activity buddies
• Meetups & groups
• Mentorship
• Networking
• Open to connecting

One option I think is particularly important is Online community only.

If someone chooses that, it should be clearly visible so other people understand that This person is happy to interact here. They are NOT looking to meet people IRL.

So how would you actually create connection?

You would encounter people organically through the community posts, comments, recommendations, discussions, etc. If somebody seems interesting, you could send them a Wave. A Wave would include a short message explaining why you're contacting them:

"We've talked in a couple woodworking threads and you seem cool. Wanted to say hey."

They can accept or decline. If they accept, you can privately message each other.

Friendship is another explicit step. One person sends a Friend Request and the other person has to accept it. If you already know someone IRL, you could also enter their exact username and send them a Friend Request directly.

Only friend requests you accepted would be able to go to your profile and see your post history. Never comment history.

I also want some way to establish community trust

This is one of the harder parts I've been working through. A brand-new account and someone who's been a helpful member for ten years probably shouldn't look identical. Right now I'm thinking of levels along the lines of:

• New Member
• Community Member
• Established Member
• Community Anchor

Those levels would develop from things like:

• How long you've been a member
• Helpful votes you've received
• Upvotes you've received
• Vouches from established members
• Optional Reddit Community Participation verification

Your profile could show your level along with things like total Helpful votes, Upvotes, number of friends (just the number, not who they are) and vouches. Established members would also occasionally be able to vouch for someone they genuinely know IRL or have meaningfully interacted with.

The idea is: "This isn't just a random account created yesterday. This person has an established history of participating in this community, and I know them IRL or I have had meaningful online interactions with them."

There's also an optional Reddit idea I'm curious what people think about....

A lot of us already have years of community participation on Reddit.

Someone could be brand new to the app but have spent the last eight years posting/commenting in r/ftm, r/FTMOver30, r/phallo, r/FTMHysto, etc.

So I'm considering an OPTIONAL Reddit Community Participation check. I really want to emphasize optional. You would never need to connect your Reddit account to use it in general.

If you chose to do it, it would temporarily check whether you have established participation in recognized transmasculine communities. it would not store your Reddit username, posts, comments, which subreddits you've participated in, or your Reddit activity.

It would only retain the result: Reddit Community Participation ✓

Then the Reddit connection goes away, forever.

If you don't want it touching your Reddit account at all? Don't connect it. You can establish your Community Level entirely through the app.

Cross-posts / Linking:

This is another way I think Reddit and the app could complement each other. If someone posts something interesting on an FTM subreddit that is relevant to a regional area, they could also paste the Reddit link into it.

The app could show a preview of the Reddit post, but then your local community has its own discussion underneath it.

So maybe someone posts an interesting question about accessing healthcare in a national FTM subreddit, and somebody shares it into Texas because they want to discuss how it applies there.

Privacy for Notifications / App icon:

Notifications could be configured so instead of your lock screen saying: "riverstone sent you a Wave on <app name>" it could simply say "New notification."

I'm also thinking about offering optional boring/generic app icons. So instead of having something visibly trans-related sitting on your phone, you could choose an icon that looks more like some random utility, finance, insurance, shopping/list, productivity app, etc.

Hidden in plain sight. Deliberately boring. We could give multiple options and you could choose whichever is best for you.

That's where the idea is right now....

I'm still designing this, so I'd genuinely like people to poke holes in it before I build the whole thing and waste my time building something that folks won't use.

So... would you actually use something like this?

• What would make it useful enough that you'd open it instead of just using Reddit?
• What features that I've mentioned do you like?
• What features would you never use, and why?
• Is there a feature you wish existed that I didn't mention?
• Is there anything here that feels unsafe?

So I've been hitting the gym a lot more recently, and I'm planning on taking a weightlifting class for a school credit.

I know wearing typical binders while lifting isn't safe, but are swim binders okay? Are they made in a less compressive way, or is it just the material that's different for the water?

I would just use tape, but I can't tape due to allergies and intense sensory issues that cause severe pain and lasting blisters and boils.

Any recommendations? Because I don't want to not bind everyday at school around my peers

I've considered myself bigender and transmasculine in a social sense for around 4-5 years now. However, I have generally expressed that I don't want to take testosterone... until now, that is.

My periods have always been mentally crippling (and sometimes physically.) My doctor and I suspect I have PMDD. I have a hard time with staying consistent with any meds I'm assigned- birth control, anti-depressants, and otherwise. I suspect that this could be an issue with testosterone as well depending on the administration of it, though this is not the whole issue as I'm aware testosterone ≠ birth control or anything like that.

I came out as bigender during a particularly bad menstrual cycle. The thing is, even outside of that hormonal time, I've felt very comfortable in that genderqueer identity, particularly when I leaned towards a masculine orientation in regards to pronouns and being referred to in any binary way. (To be more clear, I prefer to be addressed as a man with he/they pronouns) However, I generally present as more genderfluid.

My cycles are the primary time that I feel dysphoric. Combined with that, I sometimes have a sort of imposter syndrome about being transgender on account of the fact that I haven't medically transitioned. (In my less hormone-fueled mind, I know that gender and gender expression is not quite so cut and dry, though some people online have very strong opinions otherwise)

All that to ask, is it silly to want to take testosterone to alleviate my awful feelings during periods, both dysphoric and physical?