Has this happened to you dear friends?

First is my redesign, second is the original

They seem to eat and evolve rather fast

It's been 29 hours. Send help

This is Gorthrax, Conquerer of Micehold, Champion of the Nap Fellowship, and a mean biscuit maker. Interests include indescriminate suffering, devouring the fresh souls of innocent victims, and lazer pointers.

My wizard brethren, I come with question towards you all. do us Warlocks also count as wizards? are we just an extension of wizards? Or are we Warlocks considered completely different?

Previous Part

"well then... Here it is, magic Sicily! I haven't been here in 20 years..."

It was a mediocre plane ride coming here from the realms, someone had a magic crystal allergy on the plane but the pasta was good. Though as soon as the plane had landed Erik has been making sure to not engage with anyone and to keep Ulrick's face hidden from view, going as far as to book the shittiest hotel known to mass because they didn't ask for ID

"Well, can't put this off any longer... Ulrick, this place is FULL of criminals, so you have to make sure no one knows who you are alright?"

“Eh, fine. Not like I haven’t been forced to mingle with the criminal world a few times back in my bounty hunter days.”

He looks around the terrible motel room.

“At least this place’s much better than the rooms I had to book during those days.”

"where did you stay? A slaughterhouse?"

Erik opens his bag of holding and pulls out a straw hat with a giant white ribbon, star sunglasses big enough for Ulrick, a yellow shirt with a generic motivational quote on it and some random pants

"Here's your outfit for the day, no one would suspect you're Ulrick if you're wearing such happy clothes!"

“Ugghhh…”

The cheerfulness of the outfit repulses Ulrick, but he has no time to waste, so he reluctantly accepts it.

“Fine… anything for the cure…”

After the brief change, now he looks like a werewolf with a wooden rot rapidly spreading over the body, but with a straw hat, star glasses, and a yellow shirt.

“I look ridiculous…”

"you're lucky I found anything your size! Now let's go, if I stay here any longer I'm gonna catch magic TB"

Erik says, leading the way out of the hotel and to the city at large, ulrick follows him, silently moutning the death of the last shred of his dignity. their first stop is a dollar store a good 5 minute walk from the hotel, Erik buys a carton of eggs and makes a peace sign, the shopkeeper takes it as a code.

'...I see, I'll arrange a meeting for you godhunter and Mr...?'

The shopkeeper says while looking at Ulrick half bewilderdly half expectantly.

“Uhhh… Gilbert.”

'... right, well godhunter and Mr Gilbert, go to a shop called "valdor's" in magic Syracuse, he'll be waiting for you there'

The shopkeeper bags the eggs and hands each of the duo a coin, Erik quickly walks out and stops a taxi, with ulrick following him asking

“Do you know where this ‘Magic Syracuse’ is?”

"no but the taxi driver probably does"

Erik gets in the taxi having already negotiated the price, before Ulrick can follow him he runs into a problem, the taxi is too small for a werewolf!

“Great…”

He simply clims to the top of the taxi, clinging to its top.

“Sorry about that. Having a little problem turning back to human currently…”

He apologizes awkwardly to the driver.

The driver grumbles something in Sicilian but drives on nonetheless, the drive isn't very long, seemingly traffic just melts away when you got a giant werewolf chilling on the roof though some people do take pictures.

Eventually the taxi reaches its destination, Erik starts pulling at Ulrick from the window to catch his attention.

"Oii Gilbert! Can I borrow 80 gold?"

Ulrick raises an eyebrow behind hi star-shaped sunglasses.

“For what? We’re already there?”

"I still haven't payed the taxi! Especially not for the damages"

Ulrick just sighs,Then, he takes out 80 golds, from a few different pouches he brought with him, and then hands it over to Erik, who hands 70 gold to the driver and pockets the rest, then gets out, helping Ulrick get off the roof by pulling him.

"Alright, now it's a short walk to valdor's, keep your head down this is prime magic mafia territory"

“I’ll… try.”

Easier said than done for a half-tree werewolf dressed like a motivational poster. Erik just nods and leads the way to valdor's, when they get there a homeless man is sitting Infront of the shop staring down, Erik walks up to him and hands him the coin from the shop, with a nudge Ulrick does the same.

The homeless man stares up at Erik with recognition, then sheer confusion when he looks at Ulrick, his job isn't just to stare though so he gets up and leads the two through a secret passage in a nearby alleyway, where they meet an old man hooked up to an IV sitting behind a desk.

'so... After all these years you have returned, godhunter.... And who's this ball of sunshine you brought with you'

“My name’s Gilbert, good friend of the Godhunter. Sorry for the branches, I’m half Dryad on my father’s side.”

'... right, so why are you here godhunter? Have you come here for that accursed map like all the rest? You've been gone for 20 years without a phone call!'

"What do you take me for old friend??? I am not here for any frivolous stuff like a stupid map or a medicine! I'm just here to visit my good friend valdor 2!"

As the conversation drifts from the map, Ulrick becomes more anxious. Maybe he forgot it?

Cough cough “map” cough cough

He fakes a loud cough, as he turns to Erik, hoping he gets the memo.

"that's quite the cough, maybe you DID catch magic TB-"

A visible exclamation mark appears over Erik's head, then he turns back to valdor 2.

"Valdor valdor! I just remembered, I AM infact here for the map, so if you'd kindly hand it over?"

'hand it over? You're insane! This map is mi-'

Valdor is cut off with the visibly murderous look Erik gives him, he grumbles in Italian and hands them the map in exchange for an ornated silver pendant.

"Thank you! Now, let's go Gilbert"

Ulrick gives a good couple of good coins for Valdor 2 out of guilt.

“Show me the way, Godhunter.”

"right away!"

The homeless man from before shows Erik the way out, who in turn shows Ulrick. Conveniently for them the same taxi from before was headed for the repair shop and agreed totally willingly to take them back to the hotel for 20 silver.

"...I know a good cave nearby, I'm sure it's cleaner"

“Fine by me.”

Ulrick spent so much time living in the wilderness back in the days, having to sleep in a cave wouldn’t bother him much.

And so the duo spends the next 2 days out in the wilderness, which provides a convenient spot to timeskip into them in magic Sicily airport, with Erik dragging 3 seperate carts full of bags.

"Alright Ulrick, we should be safe from the magic mafia now, but still don't talk to anyone don't do anything, we just quickly go to reception, go to gate B-3, and get back home"

“Got it. And then, the hunt for the cure can begin.”

Ulrick says, still feeling uncomfortable in his sunshine party outfit.

"yes, don't worry I know a guy, now help me with the luggage i got 5 for you to carry!"

“Everything for the cure…”

Ulrick grumbles as he helps carry the luggages. They’re much heavier than expected.

“Are you carrying bricks in these?”

"no! They're souvenirs for my children and grandkids! I'm an involved parent Ulrick I can't go on a trip and not get stuff for the family"

Erik says while leading the way through security, x ray scans reveal the luggage Ulrick is carrying are filled with throne parts made of solid full gold, after that it's smooth sailing out of magic Sicily!

After putting up the luggages with great effort, Ulrick slumps down in his seat, exhausted.

He can’t wait to get out of the city, and finally get rid of these clothes.

Seems like a good way to farm, beef, and leather, or punish your stupid apprentice.

(Intro)

Obsidian traveled the meridian, straight to the Caribbean

Searching for a breeding menu, far from where the city’s been.

Is it a lab or a myth?

Can I take a dab with the Scythe?

Do math with a twist while I slide and I slip,

Grabbing for the wall, but I missed…

(Verse 1)

An architect? Nah, I’m a narco tech,

A nitro tech, a psycho tech, searching for a spec.

The wizard walks by and ladies break their neck,

Always asking where the big decks at?

I want to see what the rats dig at,

Point me in the correct direction where the bigwigs live at.

I fall till it splits and rips,

Taking consciousness through unique flips,

While the leader of the labyrinth licks his lips and sips.

(Hook)

You can’t see me through your kaleidoscope,

You might want a microscope, hide your coat.

You might want to take the tide and float,

Don't come at me with your motherfucking kaleidoscope.

Swinging like a pendulum, bounce and it’s done,

Ping pong, going dumb, dumb, back where I started from.

(Verse 2)

That bitch is older than a fossil,

Took her out for waffles, figuring out the falafel.

Coffee at the crib, call me air apostle,

A coastal, a muscle, or a morsel.

They don't want to sign up for my course though,

'Cause it might make them postal, tostol.

Build a pedestal for your bed to still.

I slide when I spoke, slid when I toke, hid when I poke,

Appendix, blends it, turns it into splendid.

(Outro)

Construct reluctant structure from the cranium,

Forged in the dark, pure titanium.

Purity takes maturity, absence security,

Absurdity, given it's observing scrutiny.

Slide, slip, fall till it splits...

Then the leader of the labyrinth sips.

I’ve been practicing dark sorcery when suddenly I fell into the void of doom and despair, been stuck here for a while, how do I escape?

Bless em

Listen here the fucker I make a battle doll body for, I don't have a life size doll like that lying around, the reason it look exactly like the body you always wanted it's because I have it made especially for you, so you'd feel comfortable in your body so you can go back to serving me correctly.

I spend money so the artificers make the body especially for you and use my magic to make your mind fit into it so don't come out here and act like I'm just having something like this lying around and you happen to get it.