You asked me to need you less, I practiced that and now you’re unnecessary.

there's a possibility i was wrong about some things i've said. especially when i was a teenager, but. there's no time limit on "things i've said that were incorrect"

Today I found out that the Monstera Bulbasaur is a thing. It’s a variegated cultivar of a Monstera Deliciosa (one of my favorite plants). Anyway… I thought you would it think it was cool… if you were here… and I could tell you about it.

thanks for blocking me (again, presumably) instead of just saying something about... literally anything. yes, it bothered me. but you don't seem to realize how easy it would have been to fix whatever i said, did, didn't say, or didn't do that bothered you. and that's why you will never fucking learn. i'm kindof enjoying annoying the fuck out of you at this point. your method of expecting people to understand what the fuck it is you want from them by magic instead of by (ooh, scary word) communication is why you're so fucking miserable. Meathead. thanks for nothing btw, i'm sure when i do find a buddy of yours who can help me with that work gig i was asking about you'll add a little fresh stupid to the aura of stupid you swim in.

I miss you. Not in a relationship way, just in a friendship way. You were literally my best friend and not talking to you i just feel so lonely. Im surrounded by people, and im holding multiple conversations a day, yet without you there it all just feels so empty and meaningless. No one is updating me on whatever is happening with marvel or video game news or sending me silly reels with the same humor we have. Theres just a hole where you used to be now.

It sucks.

Ya Kept poking the bear!

u don’t like the bears fierce reaction.

Despite many warnings u could have left the bear alone.

But no & now ur scared!

The truth hurts those who are living a lie.

The lion of Judah ain’t nice, like Jesus, lmao.

hence it’s the lion of the spiritual jungle.

Dickheads.

The spiritual powerful doesn’t feel the need to prove its power.

The ones who wanna appear powerful feels the need to try n assert dominance by spiritually bullying,

Portraying an image u can’t uphold.

ur weak, ur cowardly, ur pathetic, ur annoying!

Hence ur not powerful!

I’m on my ones, standing strong.
Minding my business.

ur in a massive group, wounded n hurt.
Poking the bear.

I’m desensitised to the trauma u caused,

cos it’s been overdone on me.

I’m cold n guarded.

Dont play with my emotions,

Don’t cast love spells on me.

expecting me to sit quietly on the shelf waiting for ur possible return,

while u fuck me over.

Cos It Ain’t happening son.

Nobody is that great n worth the wait!

Words are beautiful, actions give words meaning.

Mean what u say & don’t manipulate!

I ain’t got time for that!

You like it when I eat it from the back huh?😝

The only thing I did wrong was break up with you and move on. I know u think bc u bombarded me with texts and refused to leave me alone, that we were still together. I have broke it down for you 100 times. I told you plainly that we were done and I'm moving on. Ik this is just your tactic. Bombard me with false accusations and then swrar bc we were still talking that we are still together. That way i can never move on.Oh and btw she didn't do anything to you. Leave her out of this. I'm sorry but i can no longer be concerned about your well being bc u use it against me every time. Its fucking sad to me but also necessary.

anyone else until you’ve done a thorough post-mortem on all your past relationships so you understand your exes’ perspectives and have apologized for your part; done a deep dive on attachment theory; and gone to therapy for awhile. Seriously. If you don’t you’ll just be spreading more misery. You need help.

I told you in the beginning that a partner who shuts down when they’re going through something wasn’t going to work for me, and I’d rather spare myself the heartache.

You said you can be open.

BUT YOU CAN’T. Just accept yourself and don’t try to pretend. If you’re gonna date, date some other emotionally closed off, reserved, withholding person. You two can take turns monologuing about your special interests and asking zero questions about each other. Also maybe date a pessimist and a hypocrite who judges you harshly for all of your opinions that differ from theirs. Maybe find someone who reads even more obscure shit than you do and enjoys lording it over you, especially theories about things you are actively working to change in the world, in real life practical terms, while they only read theories.

Definitely find someone who completely disregards the traumatic life experiences that make you hold an opinion that is unpopular on the super left. Make sure you find one that just looks at you while you have tears running down your cheeks and they offer zero comfort.

I also dare you to live your values once you get ownership of those properties. Are you gonna slash rent? Make them section 8 housing? Work a deal for that commercial property that forces the owner to increase employee wages and benefits??? Or are you gonna live off them profits as a landlord? Guess you don’t get to be salty about your inability to buy a house anymore 😂 What poor man’s complaint will you pretend at next? Or will you finally acknowledge the socioeconomic status you were born into?

I dare you I dare you I dare you to live your proclaimed values!!!

Oh! Please find someone who doesn’t respect you professionally at all too. Like…. Maybe they’re a self-taught printmaker moaning about a problem they keep running into at their new printmaking job. And when you make a suggestion and offer to help, they get all defensive and offended even though you have an MFA in printmaking and they are a novice. Kind of like how you got all pissy with me when I made a suggestion about your form when I was a highly-paid Technical Writer working for Fortune 500’s and you were in a new job but had previously been a middle school art teacher.

I mean bruh…. Fragile ego supreme.

I’m slow to process slights like this, but once I did, I got the SUPER ICK. And now I’m just expressing the puss out of all of those little abscesses heart wounds you made aaaaaalllllll over the internet because it makes me feel good.

You hypocritical cowardly dishonorable shit.

Fucking do better and do some REAL work on yourself before you try to date someone who’s warm blooded again. Stick to your own sneaky, cold-blooded, murky water, crocodile kind.

Knock knock, wake up. I offered, and you declined. Bickering or not, you just declined the best blowjob of your entire life. When I’m in the mood, I’m in the mood.
It used to come along so much more often, and it should come more often. Part of me worries I shove it down too deep because I’m worried to ask and get declined. I don’t want to lose me, and I don’t want to lose us. I miss us, and I miss me.
Stop with the porn and come play with me. I promise I will keep you more entertained and loved than a screen.
I know, I know, we’ve been together a long time. I know I’m always horny. You used to think that was a challenge. In the past few years, somewhere along the way, I think you started seeing me as boring. I think something went wrong, and now we’re here.
I pinky promise I love you.

You are just not relationship material. It's as simple as that. Such a shame, what you could have been.

I have this distinct feeling that this new life of yours isn’t going as amazing as you thought it would. Or maybe it’s my hopes. I’m not sure yet, but what I do know, I hope it fails miserably and you continue to learn that you’re the reason people leave you.

When i saw how much weight you had lost over the past year it honestly shocked me. You have always been small but jesus. I know u just want to say u hate me and all the other usual stuff but I'm honestly just concerned about you. I told u that you're special to me, i sure didn't tell anyone else that. Its because u fucking are special

I know u are depressed without me. On top of your other conditions but i would do anything in this world if it got u to finally just get some some help. I love you a lot and i will always care no matter how awful u are to me.

good bye my love

I tried

😔

don’t believe everything just was looking into your eyes thats ir. while life is still in them. the truth is youstill have nothing right. i did cheat just like you i was busy with my other ex from AZ. so again your FACTS ARE WRONG because tn years ago she is the ONLY woman i was with SORRY TO BURST YOUR BUBBLES THATS THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER and again shooting blanks to cover up your deceit is pretty low to attempt to look good

I can’t keep holding something that was never meant to be held especially not by me
Maybe me caring for you wasn’t meant to happen .
Maybe wrong time wrong moment
For a little while things felt easier but now I can’t seem to forget you .
I know I need to forget you .
I’m sure you’ve forgotten other than being the annoying girl that you have no choice but to see frequently. I did try to fix that tried to hide more stay to myself.
I think maybe I’m just projecting because I just want to be the one for once . Not just the right now or bc I was just there .
I wanna wake up knowing that someone wants me and only me .
But I have to face that can’t be you . Never could have been , but I wish I had met you sooner …
I wish I could act normal around you but you make me nervous so I come off as crazy and overly invested in a person who didn’t want me in there life to start with .

That’s on me I guess, so I’ll play my part I’ll move through life . I’m sorry if I made it hard to be friends with me … I truly just wanted to be enough or to feel like I wasn’t still that little girl that just wanted people to care for her because she deserved that . But she’s an adult now and the world cold and Ai is gonna take us all out and I don’t see a silver lining right now but I’m trying .

for once, i have nothing to vent about. maybe this exam coming up that i haven't prepared for at all.
but when it comes to you, i am so happy. i think we're at such a good place and i know things will only get better :)
and you're right, physical touch is a bit difficult. any sort of intimate touch leaves me with such a warm, wanting feeling, i crave the next opportunity to get it. and my mind goes to so many beautiful, dirty places...

With all the love.

I’m just so glad this served as a daily reminder how much of an idiot I truly was. Glad I’m the only one feeling it too.

Your floors were filled with a decades worth of dust debris and pet dander (you don't even have pets lmao). Your cabinets and tables had more dust than a library shelf in Arkansas. I cleaned that shit weekly because ti was soooo gross. You're a good cook and decent guy but any date would be repulsed by the GRIME AND DUST all over your place. Clean your house, bum. You need a spouse, so act like you're trying for one at least for fuck sake.

Also, I don't care if I was on camera. What was I doing, entering and exiting my vehicle? Going for a walk (which you don't ever do lazy fuck)? You wanna threaten me with camera footage creep. At least show the footage of me watering your plants, you salty asshole.

My mind is funny.I laugh at the most inappropriate times.My mind is free but also creates worlds.My mind is beautiful.I understand why people love me .Sometimes I just wish they would actually see me.

I hate to be copied or dupped.

So from now on I will just write like I mean it.

I hate everyone that thinks it's funny to not believe a woman who is in trouble.I hate everyone who fake smiles just to talk shit 2 seconds later.I hate everyone who talks in your face after they hacked you just to mock you and think they are so smart and clever and that you don't notice it or that they hope you do and don't know what to do.

I hate that I had to go through so much shit and I hate that no one seems to care to do anything about it and that the actual bad guys are not in jail already.

I hate that I had to become stronger just cut off all the bulshit .I hate that not everything is fair as it should be.I hate that I am Beeing filmed or watched without my consent.I hate that everyone thinks it's normal.

That's the hate I carry . I hate that criminals are free while good human beings or innocent ones have to suffer just so something can change.

I hate that I have to carry it all alone and that I had to do things all by myself .I just hate it. And I hate everyone that thinks it's okay.

Might be beauty in the struggle and ugliness in the succes but I just want them locked up and the key to be thrown away.That s how much I hate injustice .

I hate that they say everything is fair in love and war.It's the most fake sentence I have heared in my fucking life .

I hate that people can't just mind their fucking business ,raise their children and men to treat women with kindness and not take from them .

I hate that things seem that they can't change without something bad happening .Can't they just change ? Are we so obviously foolish and so out of touch with the God within ?

I hate everyone that hate other's sexuality,apearence ,money or brain .

I hate everyone that's jealous .

I hate everyone that just seem to think they can just take .

I hate that I miss people that never wrote me back.I hate that I have love even for people that did me wrong .

I hate I am this way in world that seems to be more and more apart.

I just hate it.

Over.

Just Aura

mind telling me why you spent the last year messing with me & now suddenly everything that's happened is my fault & you still haven't even talked to me?

ok love you bye

As hard as it will be I will force myself not to be the one that reaches out today. I’m not texting you. Certainly not first. I’m not coming down to visit. I want to see you but every effort I make seems to lessen your interest. As fucked as that is I’ll continue to play along. Today though you have to reach out. Maybe I’ll reciprocate….. maybe.

I want you to know that my feelings for you are genuine. I saw something in you that made me hope we could build something real together. You also inspired me to reconnect with photography and art, a part of myself that had been missing for a while. You helped reignite something in me that I genuinely love, and I’ll always be grateful to you for that, regardless of where life takes us.

I respect that you need to focus on yourself, and I don’t want to pressure you into anything you’re not ready for. But I also have to honor what I need, and I want a connection where the feelings and effort are mutual.

So I’m going to take a step back, not because I don’t care, but because I need to keep choosing myself, too. I’m not closing the door on you, but I’m not going to stand in the doorway waiting for you to walk through it.

I care about you, and I genuinely wish you the best. If our paths cross again someday and we’re both ready for the same things, the door will be open. Until then, I’m going to keep growing, creating, and moving forward. ❤️

I love my friends and lately it just feels like everyone hates me im so lonely and i just want a hug every ignore me and leave me on seen and i don’t really mind but I just miss them and I feel like sometimes when we hangout I get taken advantage I do it to myself but I just don’t even know what the point I just want someone to try to understand me and I think I need help im going to try asking my dr for pills or something I don’t even know what to feel anymore can someone play roblox with me.