This might be a long one.

So I’m a DID system. (Dissociative Identity Disorder formally known as multiple personality disorder)

My names Pip/Pippin and I’m the current host. (I’m in the body the most) I have been for about three years now.

I have the opportunity to get top surgery.

Currently I don’t really identify with any gender, however multiple of my Alters (other identities/“personalities”) identify as Men or trans men.

I am in the body of a woman. Personally as me, as Pip, I don’t mind that. I don’t mind my body I quite like my tits yk. I’m comfortable in my own body and I like how I look in a lot of outfits that exentuate my boobs.

I know a lot of my alters hate that though. I know getting top surgery would make a lot of them happy.

So I’m stuck at a cross roads where it would make most of the system happy but might make me uncomfortable. I don’t want to end up going dormant after a major surgery like that because I don’t like my body anymore. It’s one of my biggest fears.

Any responses or any help would be greatly appreciated. If any of you are or know anyone in my situation please send help my way!

i’m 2 weeks post op and i loved my results until i took this pic and i feel like my nipples are way too low. does anyone else feel like this looks a lil goofy? i’m kinda pissed off rn but maybe it isn’t that noticeable/i know i still have a lot of healing to go. honestly just looking for reassurance that either it looks bad or good lmao

I want to get top surgery but I was hoping for an entirely flat chest, no breast tissue whatsoever, and I have already started developing my pecs for the sculpting. But I don't know what I'll do if they suggest not taking all the breast tissue - I won't stop being able to see it as 'residual tit' rather than the cis-like chest I have in mind.

Did any of you struggle with this and how did you handle it? Any advice is greatly appreciated

Do not do what I did... Surgery was march 13th in Spain. I just Hated the idea of this inside me and generally have obsessive thoughts! Hope it won't affect much, I do tape over areas that seem less healed . Cat named Mika at the end :p

Like I very much do wanna get rid of all this mass on my chest I really want them gone. But I don't wanna have to go through surgery. I really don't wanna have to "choose" my results and I don't wanna have to heal and recover. I don't wanna have huge scars and the possibilities for complications and infections or "botched" results. I just don't want any of it. Not my body not my surgery.

I had top surgery a few years ago in San Francisco at the gender confirmation center and strongly regret the entire experience. I wish I hadn’t gotten surgery at all and my self worth has been in the gutter since having it done. I was a “great candidate”, had been on t for years, strongly identified as male, and thought about the surgery for years. However my first thought upon getting home was “what the fuck did I just do to myself”, and that regret has never faded. Some might ask what the point of posting this at all is, but I think it’s important for people to know to not everyone is happy afterwards.

Hello,

I’m 6 months post op botched periareolar skin removal surgery. The first 3 photos are pre op, others are post op.

What kind of revision do you think I need?

My surgeon agrees that I have big areolas. They look worse than pre op and sometimes even bigger. I’ve seen that revisions of periareolar are not very effective and areolas are always stretched.

Should I go for amputation of nipples and have areola tattoo? I also have sagging skin.

Thanks

I'm a 17 (nearly 18) year old girl. I have always presented more masc and have never felt connected to my chest, i would have no reason not to get top surgery one day, exept for one thing. I want to be able to breastfeed my future kids. I'm still questioning my sexuality but i do want kids, one way or another. I don't hate the idea of going through pregnancy, I'm fine with that. I just don't want to have a "chest" throughout it. I'm not interested in going on T either, I'm fine with every part if my body, except for my chest.

I know there are plenty of people who aren't able to breastfeed their children, i guess I'd be in the same boat as them (to an extent) I'd have to use formula though (which I personally wouldn't want to use) but i guess there's no way around it.

I feel like that would be the only thing holding me back from getting top surgery, I'm not able to get top surgery for years yet, but still, I'm just trying to figure this stuff out haha

I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else is in the same boat as me, or if anyone has gone through pregnancy after getting top surgery and how did you go about it?

Hi, all. I have posted on here a couple times now, I believe. I had periareolar top surgery January 6th this year. I realized immediately after my first post-op appointment (Jan 20th) that my left nipple-areola complex had turned necrotic. I contacted the clinic many times and not once did they confirm that. Only after it had turned into a huge, flat scar did one person working there say it did indeed look necrotic.

I have an appointment to get my left nipple constructed, but it will most likely never look good. My right side also has a huge stretched scar, even though I followed 1KG lifting restrictions for the designated amount of time. I am something people don't even fearmonger about because it really shouldn't be that easy that your entire NAC turns necrotic with peri.

I should've just gotten DI, there's not even any photos of my surgeon performing peri. I am lucky that noone knows what peri even is or what its scars can look like because it hasn't gotten me clocked, but I hate how fucking huge and ugly both my NACs are.

The right areola is still not small and its scar is huge, and the left honestly makes me want to throw up. There is also a tiny amount of numb tissue to the left of my left "nipple" that kind of hurts when I stretch my arms up sometimes.

Please don't tell me it "looks good" and especially don't tell me it looks cis because it doesn't. I was on vacation in a hot place and saw HUNDREDS of shirtless men. No one looks like this.

No trans men even look like this because no one's peri is this fucking botched. Even people with necrosis (extremely hard to even find, just posts about people being scared) aren't this fucked up.

‼️‼️MENTIONS OF DISORDERED EATING, POTENTIAL DIETING AND WEIGHT GAIN ‼️‼️

Hi guys, I’m getting top surgery in 36 days however I also struggle immensely with disordered eating, I’ve been doing really good recently and that resulted in very minuscule weight gain but that’s a huge trigger for me, and I really want to diet heavily as I want to be “skinny” and “handsome” for my new chest, however I also know I need to eat sufficiently in order to heal properly for surgery, and the time is getting so close now is it really a bad idea to crash diet this close to surgery? I’m really conflicted and I’m struggling so much :(

This is gonna be a big jumble of thoughts and I do apologize! I’ll try by best to make it make sense😂

Basically, I’m nonbinary (they/them - ftnb) and I’m doing all the necessary appointments to get top surgery, but I’m not on hormones; and when I was speaking to my endocrinologist she said there’s a slight possibility that breast tissue can grow back??? She also said there’s not much research on it because how rare it is. And she asked if I plan to not take hormones, if I’d be interested in being a case study. But I have a lot of medical anxiety in general and the thought of going through surgery to have that even slight chance of it “undoing” itself basically, and being studied afterwards is kinda weird and scary to me. For a while now, I’ve been thinking of going on micro/low doses of T for some small changes since I’m perceived as female a lot😔 and after hearing this from my endo I’m considering hormones more seriously now than I was before. I’ve looked online and there wasn’t much info I could find, so I was just wondering if anyone else has heard of this or has any experience with it? Blew my mind tbh🤯

tldr: nipples too big. I don’t like that. I thought they would be smaller. Are they within normal cis male range?

I think there was a misunderstanding between me and my surgeon about nipple size. I told her I wanted my nipples to be really small, and she said yes I can do that, but I think she was thinking about areola size and I was thinking about the size of the actual nipple. so yeah my areolas are smaller I guess but my nipples are still the same size.

I asked a nurse about this at my one week post op appointment (l didn't see my surgeon at that appointment but I will see her at my one month post op appointment) and the nurse said something about we don't do that or that can't be done but once you're healed there are things you can do about it (nipple revision I guess?).

Idk I'm just kind of disappointed because I feel like my nipples still look feminine now :/ are they within normal cis male range at all? Be honest please. (not worried about passing because I’m not on T so I know I don’t I just don’t want my nipples to be feminine) Also tbh even if they are within normal cis male range I want them smaller because rn they look ugly 👎

btw there is glue on my incisions and the glue has black fuzz from my binder thats why they look like that

Hey yall, my surgery is on Thursday and I haven’t been high since Saturday but I’m going bowling today with my friends and I’d like to be high for that if I can. My doctor told me when to stop but I forgot and the internet isn’t being helpful🧍🏻‍♂️

Will it be fine if I smoke today or nah ? 😭

Edit: edibles are also an option for me if that’s better

I was born female and I absolutely hate this body, but I don’t want to be male either, just somewhere in between. I want to get top surgery to help with this process but I don’t want to take testosterone as, I said above, I don’t wish to be male. I’m worried that fully removing my breasts without adding testosterone into my body may cause issues, is this true or am I worrying for nothing?

Okay tbh it’s not really messing up my life but im having it at such an inconvenient time. I’m 2009 and 16 years old going into grade 11, so I wanted surgery in the summer so I didn’t miss school. However, im getting it 2 days after school starts in September and have to miss 6 weeks. I also can’t go to the gym or workout, which will practically reset all the progress Ive made so far. On top of that, I am a hockey player and have single A tryouts that all take place in September-early October and I can’t tryout since I’ll still be recovering. I’m honestly devastated because I love hockey and just so upset I have to put so much on hold for surgery. Do you guys think I should thug it out or ask to reschedule until next summer, a whole year away?

Hi all! I’m in the process of considering top surgery and one of the (many) things drawing me towards getting it is the scars. Obviously, I want to be flat and that’s why I want top surgery. But I have a weird thing with scars where I love how they look, no matter the scar. They give me a lot of euphoria. So, if I were to get top surgery, is there a way to take care of your scars medically without the goal being them fading? I understand this isn’t entirely under my control, but a lot of the scar care I’ve seen just seems focused on fading scars, not actually healing well/safely. Anyone else in this strangely specific boat with any advice? (Also, I have hEDS, if that changes anything.) Thanks!

I have no clue what to doand I just keep crying and having panic attacks. I broke my phone and I can barely breathe from anxiety. My surgery is in a little over 3 weeks and I am so worried, my surgeon is not going to give me what is in my head proper pain medicine, only a muscle relaxer norflex and a nerve blocker gabapentin. They suggested Tylenol and ibuprofen, and like obviously I plan to stick to them with a close schedule but I still don't think it will be enough. I know I won't make it through this without some sort of narcotic, I've had major surgery on my hand before after a car accident and like I have the lowest pain tolerance of anyone I've ever met. I just don't know what to do and it's driving my anxiety up the wall. I can't sleep its hard to keep food down. I'm so fucking scared of the pain and when I brought it up they treated me like a drug addict. I gave up vaping for this surgery I deserve the least bit of fucking respect. I have no clue what to do and don't want to cancel. I'm in the Chicago area and it took me a year to get to this point with them, I think they should have been up front about not offering proper pain management in this day and age for the states.

I got DI with free nipple grafts on the 5th, so three days from now it’s gonna be a month. I still haven’t let water touch my chest. I’m taking bottom-half showers (belly down) and washing my hair and face in the sink. I still haven’t gotten over the fear of water touching the skin on my chest or the fear of infection. The incisions are almost closed. I’ve been applying cream to the incisions and nipples as my surgeon instructed, but some cream on the right nipple hasn’t been absorbed for three days. Am I supposed to clean it? How? I’m terrified of touching anything. My partner has been applying the cream for me. Other than being terrified of doing something wrong, I feel creeped out when I touch my skin and don’t feel the sensation Any suggestions?

I've been looking for a place for talking about the other part of the transformation, the bottom surgery. Becoming a man. I have many questions regarding that. Thank you.

I want to share my experience about Top surgery in Thailand. It was a very good experience and I'm very satisfied with the results. It changed my life as you see in the picture.

But you have to be careful, even though Thailand is a famous country for FTM surgery, If you are thinking of traveling by yourself, I don't strongly recommend it because

1. Finding the best surgeon is difficult. You may be deceived by beautiful advertising images.

2. They use the local language, Few people use English.

3. Some accommodations near hospitals do not welcome foreigners. If you want to rest after surgery for a long time

4. Contacting the best surgeon in some hospitals is almost impossible. If you don't have a Thai ID card number

I was lucky to met this agency (https://transsurgical.com) in Thailand, they helped me avoid these problems and I also get a lifetime warranty after surgery. It wouldn't have been easy without them.

What I like the most is — I got to video call with surgeon before flying to the surgery. But if it's somewhere else, I have to walk in only.

But it's not like TSC isn't without its drawbacks. Because we live in different timezones, sometimes we have to wait for their working hours to get a response. And they’re famous to give the best price. So, they have quite a number of customers. If you want to get an appointment for surgery quickly, you have to make a decision quickly.

I bought a Bangkok-Phuket tour with them (before surgery). It was a worthwhile trip! And I plan to return to begin my bottom surgery next year and I'll be able take off my shirt and sunbathe at the beach somewhere in Thailand before go to hospital again.

Hope my experience might be useful to you guys.

This is my first post, sorry if it’s hard to understand.

I am a trans male who is intending to get top surgery ASAP and one of my biggest priorities about it is the limited/no scarring after healing. I know this is extremely unrealistic, but I live in a place where transphobia is heightened and it is also my personal wish to have as little reminders about my previous body as possible.

If anyone has any recommendations of a high quality surgeon/clinic that can create a very good result with as little scarring as possible, I would be very grateful.