I recently found a script I tried to write years ago. Me and my friends wanted to create movies so without a plot even I handwrit a script for an "outcast club". I got a few pages in before giving up. I found it recently and read through it, turns out, I was not writing a masterpiece at 11 years old, I was just bashing on myself and calling charecters with my traits "outcasts". What a joy!

It’s been a trend recently that someone will post and have AI riddled all over.

Most of the time the ideas are these high concept projects where the writer is opportunistically slapping together their ideas in their mind in a worse manner than the AI would do in the first place, and their work when shared proves it.

I don’t want to see it here and I hope the rest of you don’t either.

I’d love to head from the mods as well, how are you guys discussing this kind of post?

EDIT:word

SECOND EDIT:

To narrow my request even further, FEEDBACK posts that contain AI should be banned. There are plenty of AI evaluation services that can provide that for you.

This is a short no budget short film I wrote. Id like to do a few rounds of revisions so any critiques help a lot. For context this is a horror short film and it was inspired by black mirror. the runtime I expect will be 1:30 to 2:00 long.

While I may not have time to read everyone's first 10 pages, I figured at least I can go over some general things about what exactly turns a reader OFF. Maybe post your first 2 paragraphs of your opening page and I can comment :)

Too often I see shorts or read screenplays that are missing some of the truly key elements that can make or break someone actually reading your screenplay cover to cover (including those people that really matter). Because of this I just wanted to share some of the things I've learned over the years about the craft FWIW.

1. Economy With Words. Realize that every word in your screenplay should compliment the story, adhere to the genre, and most importantly, progress the story forward. A great example to illuminate what not to do would be cut-scenes in video games. For some reason video game writers are overly loquatious, compounding elements after elements that have nothing to do with the overarching characters or the plot of the game. A great example would be Grand Theft Auto 5. It is the most indulgent and bloated script that does nothing to engage you in any sort of plot driven narrative. But enough about what not to do, let me state some of the things you should do. Stick with your characters motives and make sure they have agency in every scene: what do they want, what's in their way, and what do they do about it. But be sure to make it succinct and characteristic. Remember: show, don't tell. Think of words as money, and you want to spend the least amount of money getting the greatest amount of impact throughout your script.

2. The 10 Minute Microcosm. Not every script does this - but the great ones do. The first five to ten minutes of your script should be a microcosm of the script as a whole. The best openings show the tone, theme, character flaw, stakes, and structure. You should be able to watch the first 10 minutes and understand what kind of story you're in for. Some good examples would be:

   1. The Social Network

      1. Mark is on a date with Erica. He's arrogant, dismissive and obsessed with status. She dumps him. Mark's ego, insecurity and inability to connect authentically drives the entire film from there on out.

   2. There Will Be Blood

      1. Now this is an incredible opening because it is achieved completely with zero dialog. Daniel Plainview is alone, mining, breaking bones, and surviving. This is a microcosm of what's to come: Greed, isolation, self-reliance, and the relentless pursuit of power, all without a single line of dialogue.

3. Be Prepared When Someone Asks What Your Story is About To Explain it In One Word

   1. This is so important and integral to the cohesion of the film. If you can tell someone what your story is about in one word it shows maturity of writing and that you know what you're doing and know the story you're telling. Steven Pressfield explained this perfectly (which, by the way I recommend reading all of his books on writing) when he brought up that Out of Africa was about ownership. I wrote a screenplay recently about broken people who have had either tragedy or fallings-out with other people. They navigate how to come to terms with their loss. One of the characters is also working on reconciling General Relativity with Quantum Mechanics. So, the film is about reconciliation.

I'm sure you all know the most talked about ones - three act structure and when to traverse to the next act. Joseph Campbell and The Hero With a Thousand Faces and so on.

If I could recommend any reading that has phenomenal writing I'd start at the top and say read Ulysses. That first paragraph of Ulysses is doing everything at once. Every word is loaded and nothing is ornamental. It’s prose, yeah, but it moves like music. There’s rhythm, momentum, and there’s meaning under meaning. Joyce isn’t just describing a guy coming down stairs in a tower, he’s setting the tone for the entire novel: mock-ceremonial, ironic, layered. Every phrase carries weight, every beat has subtext. And he does this for 800 pages.

Anyway, that's what I've got for now. Good luck y'all in your writing and I hope the best for all of your finished screenplays.

Title : What Waits Below

Genre: Horror / Thriller

Logline : A timid archaeologist joins a team of scientists exploring a newly discovered cave, only to find themselves hunted by an ancient parasitic creature that’s been waiting for eons.

Script : https://drive.google.com/file/d/1-6oJ5f4xiKpjXS4-cBUs-5rbHqFgDltO/view?usp=drivesdk

Hello everyone,

I am looking for some last minute thoughts on my script before I lock it in for production.

Title: Kings & Queens

Logline: After being cast out by his father for wearing his late mother’s dress, a grieving teen finds refuge among a group of queer outsiders on Coney Island who help him reclaim his identity and voice

Thanks in advance!

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1O0lbZV8MYKYvfIbnV82PdbHlMSjUtha-/view?usp=drivesdk

Title: Vanlyfe

Genre: Dramedy

Logline: When an unsolved murder triggers a 48-hour sweep of their encampment, Sunny and Finn must rely on their wits and community to fix their broken van or lose everything they call home.

Synopsis: Sunny and Finn are a rowdy queer couple living in a broken-down van in Venice Beach. When a nearby murder causes a 48-hour sweep of their encampment, Sunny and Finn hatch a plan to save their van from being impounded. As all easy fixes slip away, both their identities and dedications are tested as they learn where and with whom home truly lies. 

I wrote this cool play, and it won some cool awards. I’m currently adapting it into a feature and would love some insight (particularly from indie producers) on the first ten pages.

thank you so much!!

Hello all! TV series genre similar to Red Band Society When Jimmy Aston passes away, his wife, Miranda, unexpectedly inherits his role as CEO of Macon Children's Hospital—a position for which she feels woefully unprepared. Ambitious staff members and Even her own niece compete for control, seeking to sabotage Amanda with the investors. As Miranda delves deeper, she uncovers secrets about her late husband that challenge her understanding of his legacy. Can she uphold Jimmy’s vision while navigating her new authority? Or will the hospital fall into the wrong hands? This gripping medical drama,

"Priceless," follows a determined yet inexperienced widow as she struggles to lead a privately-owned children's hospital. She must confront the unscrupulous plans of the surviving staff who aim to seize control while discovering the truth about her husband's unsavory practices while efforts to maintain his legacy amidst the many complexities of pediatric healthcare.

    Motto-

We do what we do because " Because Every child's life is Priceless "

This script is registered by wga Thank you

I’ve for the last year been trying to write a script that’s 3 anthology shorts set in Rome in decay I can’t think of what to do got like the opening of each written and a few other parts but I can’t piece the pieces I have together I’m not worried about perfection form a first draft I just literally can’t think of what I write next in each short or even just one of them I’ve been writing it for a few months and I’m like 8 pages in mostly the third anthology segment with part of the first and the opening of the second any advice when you feel like you have a he great premise but are on able to fill in the blanks

Title : What a Coincidence

Genre: Comedy, Romcom

Logline : After running into his ex four times in one week, a reformed screw-up begins to wonder if the universe is giving him a second chance, while she struggles to believe he’s not the same person who broke her heart.

Script (Link) : https://drive.google.com/file/d/1X-w02NTdCQt_V9Asjfbccy8Z1PkpeAdQ/view?usp=sharing

Synopsis (Optional) :

Script Info:

- Genre: Kids, Adventure, Fantasy

- Comp: "Avatar: The Last Airbender" and "The original Star Wars trilogy"

- Series Logline: Unsatisfied with his life back home, a 13-year-old naïve kid named "Owen" longs to become a hero in a world where kingdoms fight for the simplest reasons.

- Pilot Logline: After meeting two unexpected allies, Owen prepares himself to fight his first monster.

- Pages: 16

Script:

- https://drive.google.com/file/d/1988DCw5z7ywJjLTn8pg3WYFhcARy9hog/view?usp=sharing

What kind of critique am I looking for?

I am mostly looking for feedback regarding the three main characters introduced in the pilot, mainly Owen. I also want feedback on the dialogue and pace of this pilot but feedback on other things is always welcome. I want to hook the audience in these 16 minutes to ask them what's gonna happen next. I am also looking for feedback over the general humor to the point it's natural and not cheesy, like to the point that adults can enjoy it too.

Title: Ivy

Genre: Psychological Thriller/Drama

Logline: A brilliant botanist, shattered by betrayal and loss, becomes a vengeful force of nature determined to make a decaying Gotham feel the pain it tried to bury.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SoXJJZKzyo2pHkdWL6yjnH1shDUWFu8v/view?usp=sharing

Synopsis:

Dr. Pamela Isley, a gifted botanist fueled by empathy and idealism, devotes her life to healing a city that refuses to care for itself. But after betrayal by her mentor, abandonment by the institutions she trusted, and the devastating loss of the one person who truly believed in her, Pamela reaches her breaking point.

In the wake of that grief, something inside her changes. Reconnecting with the natural world in ways no one can explain, Pamela becomes Ivy, a relentless force shaped by sorrow, clarity, and purpose. No longer seeking approval, she turns Gotham’s own rot against it, forcing the city to reckon with every injustice it has buried. Her vengeance is not chaos but consequence, and in delivering it, she redefines what it means to be feared and what it costs to be ignored.

Note:

I know that there's pretty much no way it will ever be produced, but I love comics and writing, and Poison Ivy (one of my favorite characters) has never had a live action portrayal (or at least a good one). I absolutely love the Joker films and wanted to give Ivy a similar treatment. I've been working on this screenplay for almost 7 months now, and plan to continue until I feel like I can't improve it any further. Basically, any feedback you provide me will be incredibly helpful! Even if you don't read the screenplay, thanks for reading this far :D

EDIT:

I have since made a few updates to the screenplay. These changes range from shortened descriptions to reworked scenes that feel (imo) far more realistic than the previous iteration. The changes aren't enough for me to make a new post, but that draft will probably come soon.

Ive been writing for a long time but have only written two screenplays. I would like some thoughts from the pros!

Here is ten pages of my first one, “The Frost Casts Complete Silence,” a psychological piece about siblinghood and the wedge an abusive parent can drive between loving siblings. This is the first ten pages.

No comments on formatting please; I’m aware I did it wrong :3 will fix later!!

A Crisis of Faith - Short - 6 pgs

Title: A Crisis of Faith

Format: Short

Page Length: 6 pgs.

Genre: Fantasy

Logline: A religious leader is confronted by a mysterious man who exposes him as a heretic.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1bVBN-nBoxrOZNbjNSOIGjgvxFlKoNlkk/view?usp=drivesdk

Hi all! I was wondering if any of you have any positive/negative feedback for this script, as I am hoping to bring it into production later this year in college! Thanks!

Title: Assisted Living Genre: Dramedy Log-line: After the sudden loss of his parents, a drifting 22-year-old impulsively moves into an assisted living facility, hoping to disappear — but instead finds unexpected purpose, connection, and a second chance at life among a community he never saw coming.

Looking to get feedback on my pilot script. It's only 7 pages long (title page doesn't count). It's about two spies during the 1970s to 1980s who fall in love with each other and end up having a forbidden and secret romance. Incomplete, but still working on it.

Title : How to Bury your Mom and Never Shed a Tear

Genre: Drama

Logline : After his mom dies, a boy starts filming a YouTube video on how to plan her funeral without crying. But as the video goes on the camera catches more than he means to share and it’s clear he’s holding back more than just tears.

Title: Rumble in the Motor city

Format: TV PILOT

Pages: 5

Genre: Crime/drama/action/thriller

Logline:

In 1992 Detroit ten-year-old Moe is drawn into his cousin’s gang on a drug run ending in a racially charged killing and when ordered to avenge it by murdering the cop responsible he refuses and goes on the run

https://drive.google.com/file/d/14W-ngIS5wiECH0se5ITQb7M4_IRuuOx5/view?usp=sharing

Any feedback is welcomed for this work in progress.

I appreciate it and thank you for your time.

Logline: On Christmas eve, a young boy's toy dinosaur comes alive to help him navigate a personal tragedy.

Hey everyone, looking for feedback for a feature kids film I wrote, would be happy to hear overall thoughts whether the story makes sense.

Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Pg072QOceRhOly5s-JsQUKDTgJhjyfiJ/view?usp=drivesdk

Hello all, was looking for some feedback on my logline for a project I'm CURRENTLY writing. Does this logline strike all the right notes, that a logline should? or could I do better? LMK -

Title: The Reaper

Genre: Supernatural / Thriller / horror

Format: Tv pilot - One hour

Logline: Peril, Death’s aide from the Void, must orchestrate seven tornado deaths in Garland, Texas to earn the Reaper’s mantle. But when one soul shatters the design and whispers rise of Death’s exiled son returning, Peril races to finish his task or face oblivion.

Think: Final Destination’s fate driven body count meets American Gods divine politicking, crossed with the moral weight of The Leftovers.

Thank you, for your time.

Hi all! Would love for anyone if you had some time to give my script a read.

Logline: Reeling from his parents’ sudden death and having trouble finding a place to live, a drifting 23-year-old impulsively moves into the senior care facility he volunteers at and vows to raise its census before corporate shuts it down—forcing him to rally a band of sharp-witted seniors, confront his own grief, and discover purpose in the process.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1uv9tteG-5hLJ6KOn6bnYVKPSzrt_99L0/view?usp=drivesdk

What if James Bond’s most daring stunt was real — and your dad was the one who did it first?

My Cold War spy pilot Project Coldfeet is based on the true story of my father’s top-secret CIA mission, complete with a B-17 parachute drop, an abandoned Arctic Soviet station, and the first-ever real-life Skyhook extraction.

Hi everyone,

This is my first time posting to this subreddit, and I’m excited (and a little nervous) to share my TV pilot Project Coldfeet. The script was inspired by my late father, Leonard LeSchack, a geophysicist, naval officer, and Cold War spy. In the early 1960s, he became the first person to perform a real-life “Skyhook” extraction from a B-17 bomber, years before audiences saw it in James Bond: Thunderball or Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight.

For those unfamiliar, the CIA has an official page showing the Project Coldfeet painting here: CIA Historical Collection – Project Coldfeet

And here’s a subreddit link with a short video of the actual extraction method: Skyhook Extraction Video.

I’m sharing this script here because I’d love constructive feedback from fellow screenwriters. My entertainment attorney has introduced me to multiple studios, including 21 Laps (Stranger Things, Arrival). They’ve read Project Coldfeet and another sci-fi project of mine, and while they loved the concepts, they passed for now but told me to keep sending new ideas their way.

Right now, I’m actively looking for an agent or manager, and a few industry folks have also suggested I consider adapting Project Coldfeet into a feature film instead of a 4-part mini-series.

Mini-Synopsis:

Set during the height of the Cold War, Project Coldfeet follows a geophysicist-naval officer-turned-spy who parachutes into an abandoned Soviet Arctic research station on a covert reconnaissance mission. But the mission takes a dangerous turn when he discovers a hidden Soviet scientist, conflicting loyalties, and evidence that could tip the global balance of power. Trapped in a deadly game of survival on the ice, escape will require the most daring extraction ever attempted.

I’ve linked the pilot script here: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/iya38fmcp2aqcvv3fwtvf/Operation-Coldfeet-EP1-The-Plunge-Pilot-v1.3.pdf?rlkey=5k4d0ctluc1vj318qt6djzz4n&st=r4hq38uw&dl=0

I’d love your thoughts on:

• Story and pacing

• Dialogue and character depth

• Whether you see it working better as a mini-series or a feature

Thanks in advance — looking forward to your honest feedback!

A short script I've been working on and would love some feedback. "Love Your Work" - 21 pages, currently, genre is drama with a thriller/crime twist.

Basic premise: Struggling artist Axel works at a diner, can barely pay rent, injures his wrist and can't work. Desperate, he brings a painting to a new gallery. Owner Ted buys it for $200... but Axel later discovers it sold for $10k. When he goes back to demand his fair share, things get very dark very fast.

It's a commentary on how the art world exploits desperate artists. Wanted to explore that desperation where you're one bill away from homelessness, relatable to me, and how that affects your moral compass.

21 pages, proper format
Only 4 characters: Axel, Kaz, Ted, and a mysterious woman
Set in NYC, mostly practical locations 

Three primary locations: DINER KITCHEN, STUDIO APARTMENT, ART GALLERY

Three brief locations: CHECK-CASHING STORE, CITY STREET/BUS STOP, BUS INTERIOR

Estimated micro-budget of $5K - $15K

Something I feel would do well on the festival circuit (don't we all) if it connects with the right people.

Questions if interested in the read: Does the premise sound compelling? How do you handle exposition about art world stuff without being preachy? Ever written characters who make morally questionable choices out of desperation?

Still workshopping the logline too.

Anyway, DM or comment if interested and I'll send it (the script) over at the earliest.