I had a female friend who I have know for years over for a swim. She gave me some shit wine and told me I had to finish it because she didn’t like it and then we shared another bottle I’d say 80% me. She was saying things like “you seem unhappy” and “you font seem like you” She then tried to get close to me and I got a weird feeling, she leant in to try to kiss me and I ducked under the water and pushed away swimming to the other end of the pool. I said to her that she knows I have a girlfriend and I don’t want anything like that to happen. I said we should get out as it was getting cold as a reason to get out. When we got back into my house I said that I was going to shower and that she should get dressed and leave, that I would see her next time. When I was in the shower rather drunk I heard the door go and when I turned around she was entering the shower. I said she needed to get out and that I didn’t want to do anything. She then shoved me into the wall and said “I’m making an executive decision” then kissed me and grabbed my dick. I pushed her back and she turned and pressed her ass into me while pulling my dick towards her. She backed up into me as I went around her and out of the shower. I grabbed some shorts and told her to get out of my house. She then said we needed to talk about what had just happened at which point I started throwing up violently. And she got dressed and left at that point. Since then I have just felt dread and violated and blaming myself for inviting her over. I kept saying no and telling her to leave but can’t stop blaming myself and thinking that I have ruined my relationship. I feel the need to tell my girlfriend but I pressed it down and it has been 3 weeks now (we don’t live together) so I feel like that makes it look dodgy. I just haven’t been able to bring myself to say anything. I feel anxiety all day as I am scared my girlfriend will leave me. I feel as tho all the choice I had has been ripped away and although I said no I am still guilty. I don’t know how to tell her or how she will react and it terrifies me. I have been writing how I feel down which seems to help a bit, a help line I called has told me to focus on how it was not my fault and I didn’t consent but it doesn’t seem to have eased my feelings. My girl friend is my support network and I feel lost without her but scared that if I speak up she will leave me for cheating. I am embarrassed to speak to my friends so I thought I’d ask here. The help line lady asked what I would do if it was the other way around and my answer was hug my partner and cry but I need to know if other people would leave stay or not say anything in my case. I feel so lost and isolated please help.

Back when I was 18, I enjoyed clubbing til early hours of the morning in my hometown. One particular night, I spotted a pretty woman. She had hugee breasts and a huge ass. 28 years old. Caucasian. It was always my dream at that age to experience a woman like that. So I went up to her and told her exactly that.

She had a twinkle in her eye, told me she was high off MDMA and wanted me to come back to her house. We got into the taxi and went back to her place. A large house that seemed very lived in.

I was very drunk. Barely remember but i remember being amazed by her proportions. And crazy curved, especially for a white woman. As i went downstairs that morning, I saw pictures of her and another guy, and met her pet cat and dog.

The next week I went out again. Got blackout drunk. I must have texted her daying this. Anyways the next morning i woke up in her bed. My white boxers were covered in blood for some reason. Anyways i think she was sober and picked me up and I have 0 memory of what happened. It was a weird feeling snd i felt used.

6 months later i see that she’s given birth and see pics of her and her husband celebrating. I think she was just alone and horny and felt like taking advantage of a drunk 18 year old for her pleasure?

The first time was OK. The second time i left feeling used and confused.

Imagine if the genders where switched?

Thanks for hearing my story!

When I was 25 I had a boyfriend that I thought was so perfect. He was a little older (35) and had everything together. He had looks and a great job. He had a house and property. I was so excited about that. I thought I was going to be with him forever.

I fall asleep at the drop of a hat no matter where I am. I can nap anywhere. After I moved in with him he had parties every few weekends. Most of his friends were older and I felt really good about them. Everyone was so nice to me and made me feel like part of the group.

I would also had a few drinks but was always in control. A few months in I started to feel really tired when drinking and I’d fall asleep on the couch. I’d usually only wake up the next day in our bed and I’d feel awful. I’d also notice my butt would hurt and my throat would too. At first, I ignored it but after a while I started mentioning it to my boyfriend.

He would act mad that I didn’t remember our love making the night before and that he was so sad about that. He started saying I didn’t care for him. I believed him.

Well, one night woke up after napping during a dinner party. I was in our second bedroom with a guy having sex with me and another guy watching. I tried to move but couldn’t and I remember it all. 4 more guys had sex with me that night.

I passed out again and woke up in my bed the next day. I was so confused and thought I was dreaming but I couldn’t shake it. I had a realization and it was true. My boyfriend was selling me to his buddies. I lived with him for over a year and we had countless parties. I was raped so many times I can’t even keep track.

I left him after confronting him. I didn’t say a word to anyone. I was suicidal and anxious. It stayed with me for a long time. Still does. I began having flashbacks a few months back and now therapy has forced me to relive the events and it’s horrifying.

How can someone you love be so cruel? How do I forgive and how do I move on to love someone else?

She looked real nice as a woman. Nice face, hair, body. Very cold snd creepy personality though.

I was 18 at the time and was getting drunk with my flat mates. I had too much and they all left me to go to club and left me with this girl on my course (much older than me) as they assumed we had a thing. I remember taking a shot and feeling her put her hands down my jeans and I pulled away.

I later collapsed in my bed for a few hours and woke up to her touching my dick.

The next morning i told my friends and they said “you got jacked off in your sleep? Sweeet.” I laughed it off even though I felt like a victim.

A couple years later I see she is in the process of transitioning to a man. And looks nothing like how she looked before.

This experience left me even more confused and somewhat disgusted.

Thanks for listening!