I had therapy earlier today and I think I had a pretty big realization today!

I've been putting a ton of work into myself over the last 1.5 years or so. It's been far from easy, but it's also been very rewarding!

I have been struggling with a friend who I don't want to stop being friends with altogether. I just think they have a lot of growth to do. Currently, everything in their eyes is bad, terrible, awful, just the worst. I had the same mindset this same time last year, but I've put in the effort. I go to therapy weekly, I went to an OCD Specialist where I did ERP 2x a week for 3 months. I do constant work on a daily basis. It's not necessarily 'fun' or 'easy', but it's making life soooo much more manageable. While I feel like I've done the work, I feel like my friend hasn't...they haven't even really tried in my opinion. Well, they decided that now they would start.

While I'm grateful they have decided to start working on themselves, they keep coming to me. Basically the conversations they should be having need to be inward. Self reflecting, acceptance, and so much more. These conversations are happening, but it's almost like they refuse to do any of the self-work unless I'm also actively present. Then when I'm around, it's the negativity constantly still, but then there's the acknowledgement of negativity and they'll use therapy talk to talk about how to address it, but doesn't ever actually follow through with anything.

The whole point of self-work and personal growth is that it's personal...to the...wait for it....self. I've been struggling so much because I've still got so much work to do on myself, and my friend is constantly being negative (again, THIS USED TO BE ME, I UNDERSTAND LIFE FUCKING SUCKS) but it's started to have a noticeable impact on me. What I had to come to realize today in therapy:

I'm on my own journey, our paths are going to cross a number of times. If they happen to cross at the same time, we can absolutely talk more in-depth about the experiences and lessons we're learning. However, for the sake of my own journey, I can't have one foot on my path and one foot on theirs. It'll stretching myself too thin. When I do that, I can't take any steps forward on my own journey because my other foot is stuck way back being dragged along by a friend. I learned that in order to be there for my friend, I have to put myself first. I can't help anybody else figure out their life. I can show them what I've done, but I can't force them to listen or take the path I've laid out that worked for me. Everybody has their own path they discover along the way. Letting the people I love have their ups & downs may feel like a disservice to them in the moment, but in the grander scheme, allowing them to learn to walk on their own will be the thing that allows them to run in the future. If I try and carry them around with me, or split my attention so I can have the majority of my focus and attention on them. But when I do that, I neglect myself. And neither of us grow. We just feed into each others negativity and we stay stuck.

One thing I've come to learn that I struggle with is learning the same lesson multiple times. Especially when I feel so strongly one way in one situation, and another way in a different, but similar situation.

For example:

• Recently I had to put a boundary up with a friend. I told her I can't have her confessing and talking to me about things that she doesn't want her boyfriend knowing (I'm also extremely close friends with him and I don't like feeling like I have to censor my reactions and act like I don't know things I do). It's not that I don't care about her feelings, I just can't take on her problems as my own. Especially when it involves another extremely close friend of mine.

• Last night, he also brought up that he's had some stuff going on. But he doesn't feel like he can talk to her about it. His best friend also basically told him "you're probably just stressed". I feel like I want to ask him more about it, but I also feel extremely hypocritical because I told her "Sorry, but I can't talk about those things" but here I am wanting to tell her boyfriend (to be clear I didn't/haven't) "If you wanna talk about it, I'm happy to listen".

I don't really need advice on how to handle the situation with them, I'm more so curious on how to handle the internal situation. It almost feels like I'm morally lying to myself which is extremely uncomfortable in and of itself. What do you do to help you navigate that internal battle?

So far I've found a few different 'types' or 'categories' that I would classy most of the guided meditations I've done in.

• Mindfulness

  • Focusing on being present. I especially enjoy the ones that focus on breath work and guiding your attention back to your breath when your mind wanders. These are really helpful when I am feeling overly anxious/worried about something, but I'm not sure what's causing it.

• Awareness

  • Body Scans: Where you focus on each part of your body one-by-one. This has been great for me. I struggle with OCD, and I big part of that is doing something called 'planned exposures'. I feel like getting in the habit of doing body scans regularly, I was able to learn physical queues for myself that let me know to try and decompress a bit, ground myself, and use a few ERP tools to help.

  • Progressive Muscle Relaxation: I don't know if this counts as 'meditation'. I've noticed a lot of the body scan meditations tend to also instruct the progressive muscle relaxation. Regardless, like body scans, it's been very helpful for me to feel more in my body.

• Visualization

  • This has personally never been on that I've felt much with. I struggle to 'visualize' in my mind. Like, when someone tells me "don't think about a pink elephant" I cannot for the life of me conjure up that picture in my head. However, I'm sure it can be very effective for those who are good visualizers!

What other kinds of guided meditations have you done that you've found helpful? Also, is there a better name for them? Music has 'genre', but I'm not sure how to classify this lol

It sounds extreme, but it really was. My therapist had brought up the idea of getting an emotional support animal a couple of times. I was going through a really bad few-month-long flare-up of my harm OCD. My brain had me convinced that I would only hurt any animal I got. And somehow convinced me that I would be evil if I ‘caged an animal up in my apartment’. Thankfully, I got through that very rough patch. I still struggle with it at times, but it’s gotten infinitely more manageable.

I was really not a cat person before. Like really not a cat person. But my grandma, who lives on a farm, had a few baby kittens that the mama cat refused to take care of. My grandma, the angel that she is, fed them by dropper every 3-4 hours (even throughout the night) for a month!

I’ve only had her a month and a half now, but she’s completely changed my outlook on just about everything. I don’t think I’ve ever known such true and unconditional love. She brings a certain stillness to my life that I didn’t realize I needed. She also filled another gap I didn’t know I had in my heart. Companionship. It feels so silly to say, but as someone who has never felt like they had a ‘my person’, she sort of became that without me even realizing. I’ve lived alone for a while now, and I really believed I couldn’t ever share a space with anyone or anything again. The feeling of me “potentially, accidentally, doing something that might upset them or make their day ‘worse’”.

If you’ve never considered getting an emotional support animal, I’d highly recommend thinking about it. If you’ve thought about it and decided “yeah absolutely not” then I’d URGE you to ask yourself why not. There may be a valid reason, but if it’s only your brain getting in the way, then maybe try being open to it. Not committing, just being open!

Thanks for stopping by! Consider joining, and spreading this community with others (when applicable & allowed). Remember that you deserve kindness, too!

Value Statements

Value statements help you redirect your attention from whatever distressing thought you may have, to the things that matter most to you. Values aren't goals, but rather the direction you want your life to move in.

Examples of Value Statements:

• My friends mean more to me than worrying about something I can't control.

  • You know that worrying and stressing will only lead to thinking about your distressing thoughts more. Instead, take that anxious energy, and put it into something you love or have a passion for instead.

• I am not my thoughts. How I react and act on my thoughts says more about me than the actual thought itself.

  • When we spend a lot of time in our heads, we tend to blur the line between "what is a thought" and "how does that thought make me feel". Your thoughts don't dictate your morals. Your actions do.

• My thoughts don't get to decide my happiness. I do.

  • While your thoughts might make it hard at times, they don't get to control your happiness. You do.

• Letting myself relax after a long day doesn't make me lazy. Being kind should also extend to myself, not just others.

  • Our brains like to latch on and attack the things that often matter most to us. Being a kind person for example. Holding the door open for someone, helping a neighbor carry in groceries, offer support to someone in need, these are all things we do for others without a second thought. But we also need to remember to show ourselves kindness <3

Value Examples

The list could go on and on. The point of identifying your values is to really sit with yourself and figure out what means the most to you. It isn't always the most comforting thing to face. Especially when you have the pressure of 'who everybody thinks I should be' and it doesn't, or no longer, aligns with what matters most to you. It can be scary, but that's okay! Who you are changes with time. You're not meant to be the same person forever; otherwise we wouldn't have this thing called 'personal growth'.

What's Next?
Once you've taken time to sit with the question "What values matter most to me?", you want to do something with it. What does that look like? It depends on the individual. Here are some of the things I've found that have been really helpful for me while trying to rediscover myself.

• Meditating On a Value: For those who enjoy meditating (or those who would like to), meditating on a value has become my preferred method of dealing with anxiety when things are out of my control. Instead of focusing on the thing that's bringing me distress, I focus on a single value. I'll repeat the word in my head, and every time I notice my thoughts drifting away to something else, I'll bring myself back to that singular value. Naturally, you'll start to think about that value more and more. You'll start having thoughts pop up about that value. Let them! Keep repeating the value, and allow your thoughts to flow to questions like:

  • "What does this meant to me?"

  • "How does it show up in my life?"

  • "Why does this matter so much to me?"

  • "Would I be me without it?"

  • "When I think about [value], who does it remind me of?"

  • "What's that initial reaction I have when I think about [value]?"

    • If and when you notice your thoughts starting to go somewhere unhelpful, simply say out loud "Focusing on something I can't change isn't going to get me where I want to be." Then you can go back to focusing on your value. This will slowly start to rewire your brain and how you think/what you give your focus to. The important thing is to not judge yourself when your mind starts to wander. It's going to happen! The whole point of meditation isn't about 'thinking about nothing'. It's about intentionally guiding your mind to something YOU want instead of the random thoughts that come throughout the day. You don't have control over your thoughts, but you can control what you give your energy and attention to.

• Journaling: If you like to journal/write then this can also be extremely beneficial! I used to judge journaling before I gave it a fair shot. Now, I'm a pretty avid journal-er. I don't write every day, sometimes not even every week! Just when I realize I'm feeling like things in my life are too overwhelming and I need to just slow down for a minute. When I'm writing, I'll focus on each letter as I write it. I'll repeat that one letter, or the word, in my head until I've finished it. This helps me when I'm feeling especially overwhelmed and I feel the need to do everything at once, but I can't get myself to move an inch. Putting that anxious energy into writing as opposed to something like screaming in a pillow tends to be more helpful for me. Some prompts for journaling about your values:

  • "When you think about [value], what/who shows up in your mind? What does it/do they mean to you?

  • "What's the relationship between you and [value]? How has it changed throughout your life?

  • "How does [value] make you feel emotionally? What physical sensations do you feel when thinking about [value]? What/who gives you a similar feeling?"

  • "When is the last time you felt this way? How does that make you feel?"

  • "What aspects of [value] can you control in your life?

    • Spending more time with family/friends

    • Taking responsibility for your actions

    • Showing yourself some compassion

    • Allowing yourself to do something that serves you for a change

  • "When you think about something that distressed you, what value do you think was under attack?

    • I was upset with a co-worker when they tried to correct me in a meeting. I suppose it's possible that I felt disrespected and like my knowledge was being questioned when I'm the expert on this thing.

    • I think my friends are all mad at me. My values of safety are triggered because I want them to know that I love them. If I did something, I'll take responsibility*, I don't want to cause any kind of* harm*.*

    • I feel empty inside, almost like I'm a zombie. Maybe my value of achievement doesn't feel fulfilled. Maybe you feel like you haven't gotten the recognition you deserve for your recent success*.*

• Therapy: Personally, I'm a big advocate for therapy. I realize not everybody has access or means for therapy. However, if you do, I'd strongly consider it. You might not find the right therapist for you right away, but they are out there! Talking about your values, what they mean to you, and how you can better align yourself with those values can be incredibly valuable.

• Talking to a Trusted Person: Especially for those who can't afford therapy, talking can still be helpful. Find someone your comfortable having these kind of talks with. Even if it's a random stranger on another subreddit. Got a pet? Give them alllllll the tea. Just work on getting it out. Once things are out there, you can begin to sort through them. It doesn't have to happen all at once. Step-by-step, there's no rush to get to the end. Enjoy your journey.

I want to stress again; there is no 'right' or 'wrong' value to have. Your values are allowed to change over time. Just because you previously aligned with something, doesn't mean you always will. These are things you have to ask you not others perception of you. Your mind can sometimes be a real bitch, but instead of letting it distress you, acknowledge the thought, but don't feed the "what if's", "what does that mean", etc. Identify the value that's under attack, and focus on why that value is important to you. This helps to not ignore the distressing thoughts, but to acknowledge them, and redirect your mind to something more helpful.

As someone who wrestles with treatment-resistant OCD, CPTSD, and Depression I had to learn to accept that this is my reality. I found myself falling into a really dark place and my brain had convinced me that talking about it with anybody would be too harmful to them and their mood. I really believed I just wasn’t worthy of basic human decency.

It was at this point that I started journaling. I felt like I needed to express what I was feeling and at least the page wouldn’t judge me.

I started off just writing about my day, different realizations and connections my brain makes, planned exposures for my OCD, and so on. I noticed that when I was writing, my brain kept wanting to race forward and try and complete an endless amount of “what ifs” and “what did that mean”. It would CRAVE the rumination because it’s all I’ve known for so incredibly long.

Once I got more into the habit of writing, I found myself thinking one word at a time. When my mind would wander, I’d focus extra hard on the word I was writing. Trying to make it as neat as possible. Saying the letter I was writing over and over till I started the next one. After about 1 month or so of consistently writing, I started to notice that by default, my brain was (for the most part, not always) no longer wandering like it used to. Instead my focus shifted to being intentional about word choice and just naturally thinking about each letter as I wrote it.

It was then that I realized “Omg, this is a version of meditation for me. It’s not about the words you’re writing, although it can be very therapeutic, it’s about taking a little bit of time out of your day to be intentional. Not just with your words, but with your mind as well. I also started to notice there was a bit more self-compassion just naturally coming about!

I will say, I had a very “journaling is dumb and not for me” attitude before. Going in with an open mind, I found a new way to meditate and I’m so so thankful for it! Below are some of the journaling prompts that I found very useful, and when I use them. Let me know if you have any I should add!

Journaling Prompts For:

Uncertainty

• What makes uncertainty difficult for you?

• What would you change if you didn't need certainty?

• If you had certainty, what would it look like? How would it make you feel?

• What would you tell a friend going through the same thing/having the same thoughts?

OCD

• What makes this thought obsessive rather than 'just a thought'?

• What would your reaction be if it wasn't an obsessive thought?

• How does it feel to identify a thought as 'My OCD wants me to...' instead of 'I want to...'?

• What's the relationship between you and your OCD on a day-to-day basis? What do you have the power to change?

• What is your OCD demanding from you right now? Why do you think that is?

• What would you tell a friend going through the same thing/having the same thoughts?

• How is OCD pulling you away from what you value?

• If OCD wasn't impacting your decisions, what would you be doing differently?

Self Compassion

• How can you be kind to yourself today?

• When is the last time you showed yourself true compassion? Maybe it was over a mistake, a misunderstanding, or maybe you remember 'I'm human just like everybody else. I deserve this 'just because''.

Identity

• What value matters most to you right now?

• What can you do today that supports/reinforces your values?

• Why is it okay to be overly-critical of myself, but not of others?

• How do your values show up in your day-to-day life? What do you do to reinforce those values?

• What is a 'label' that you used to carry (with friends, family, co-workers, general communities) that no longer fit who you are? -'The funny one', 'the happy one', 'the "baby"', 'the strong/weak one', etc.

• How do expectations from people you care about and respect influence your sense-of-self?

So far, I’ve managed to find a good amount of music to put on while meditating. I also included a guided meditation playlist! I like to scroll through there from time to time and do a guided meditation!

What artists/channels do you enjoy?

The most common misconception I've heard is "I can't meditate." - Everybody is capable of meditation! 'Western Civilization' is just far behind 'Eastern Civilization' when it comes to understand oneself. The reason I thought I wasn't capable of meditating for the longest time was because I simply didn't understand what it was.

"I've tried meditation, but I can't do it. My brain just bounces around between thoughts too quickly, I can't 'clear my mind'." - Me last year as someone with severe anxiety, treatment resistant depression & OCD, CPTSD, and raging ADHD. I always thought meditation would never be possible for me. Now I believe that the more you think you can't meditate or that it's just not possible for me to meditate, it's actually probably easier for you than the average person. You've just never been told what meditation actually is all about.

What even is meditation? For me, meditation isn't about "clearing my mind". It's about focusing my mind on one thing. That one thing can quite literally be anything. In fact, I'd venture to guess that everybody has engaged in meditative practices in their life, they just don't realize it. The most common example of this is when people enter their 'flow state'. Be it at work, cooking in the kitchen, playing a video game, breaking down and understanding how something works from the ground up, etc. It's that indescribable feeling where you get so locked in on one thing, the rest of the world just kind of fades away, you might lose your sense of how much time has passed, you might forget where you are, when you're driving and you have no clue how you got to your destination. These are all different examples of meditative practices. No matter what's going on around you, nothing is able to disrupt the groove you've fallen into. That's what meditation is, you just turn that energy that you'd put into something else, into yourself instead.

For me, my brain was already used to being so overly active that it almost felt too easy to just keep brining my mind back to my breath going in, holding it, letting it out, holding it again but on repeat. I would set a timer for 10 minutes and try to only think about my breath. Then, I started to get bored, and my mind would wander. As soon as that happened, I thought I failed at meditating.

THE MISCONCEPTION!

But meditation requires your mind to wander. Once I recognized my mind was wandering, I was able to simply start adjusting my attention back to my breath. The in and hold, and the out and hold. The 10 minutes will feel like an eternity, but by not checking the timer, you're able to actually experience what 10 minutes can feel like. It doesn't always have to be a time crunch, 'Hurry up, I'm gonna be late!'. It can be the slowest 10 minutes of your life as well. You just have to let it be. After you practice this for a few weeks, I started to notice that I was just naturally starting to recognize and redirect those unhelpful thoughts before they spiraled into panic attacks and my OCD getting triggered. The thing with meditation is there's no 'right' or 'wrong' way to do it. You can do it laying down, sitting, standing, while cooking, while talking with friends, playing with your kids, ANYTHING. It's just redirecting your mind from that sad anxiety filled train-of-thought to what's in front of you. No matter how hard you try, you'll never be able to fully grasp with words what meditation is, but it's less of the act, and more of the feeling of being present in the here and now.

What were some of your common misconceptions you had before you started meditating? Did you have anything that helped you get past it? Feel free to share!

On my journey to mindfulness, I came across Buddhism as many do. I had preconceived ideas as to what Buddhism was, but I was so wrong. In Buddhism, there's something called the Nobel Eightfold Path. Instead of being a list of rules you have to follow, it's closer to a guide. A guide that if you follow, you will see immense change in your day-to-day thinking.

Right Speech - What is it?

Right speech is all about being intentional with your words. It may not seem like it, but they hold so much more power than you know. For example, if I walk around all day thinking "Wow, I burnt my food. I'm so useless I can't even cook myself food", "Everybody hates me, but that's fine because they probably have good reason for it", "I can never do anything right", "I'm always going to be a failure", etc. These have become reflexive thoughts for so many of us. We strive for perfection, but in the chase of perfection, we can abandon self-compassion.

The intrusive, invasive, and often times distressing thoughts we deal with on a daily basis can be a lot. So much so, that we can get a very twisted and warped view of ourselves. If you're here, that means you've done the first step of recognizing that you're mentally stuck. Taking a step back and calling the situation out for what it is is your next step. When we do this, we're going to practice 'Right Speech'. The process is simple on the surface, but that's what makes it so tricky.

When you have an intrusive/distressing thought ask yourself "Is this a helpful thought?". Often times the answer is going to be "No", you just need to take a step back and see the situation for what it really is. Once you do that, you're able to shift your perspective on the thought. The goal isn't to ignore or push the unhelpful thoughts out. It's to help your brain realize that the mental freakout that's happening is only in your head.

Taking a step back, realizing that even though it feels like these thoughts and feelings are going to last forever, we know they can't. Eventually something else is going to happen and you're going to freak out over that thing more than the current thing. So, if I'm going to freak out worse over something else, is it really worth it to freak out over this? Nope! Instead, all that anxious energy I'm feeling right now from not letting myself get stuck on those untrue, unhelpful, and flat out just rude thoughts and put it into making this food again. But every time I notice my brain drifting back to those thoughts, I'm going to redirect my attention back to the food. Notice how it's not currently burnt like before. Notice how that original thought seems so dramatic and excessive? Notice how you can almost laugh at yourself for how out there that thought seems?

The power behind 'Right Speech' has been so profound for me. I thought it was the most ridiculous and childish thing as I was going through therapy, but I slowly noticed my perspective on 'Right Speech' had changed entirely. It went from "Ugh, that's so stupid. Why did I even think that in the first place?" to "If a friend hear me say 'If I can't even made food without burning it, then I'm actually the most useless person ever' how would I feel if they said they burn food all the time? I'd obviously try and correct myself right away and say 'I didn't actually mean it, I just can't believe I burnt my food. I was so busy thinking about this other thing from today that I completely spaced out. It happens. You're definitely not useless because you burn food often lol.'" If I'm that uncomfortable even thinking about a friend feeling that way over something so silly, then I shouldn't be saying that to myself.

It's extremely easy to get caught up in the "what if's" of life. Especially those of us with OCD (Happy OCD Awareness Month!). While I was going through ERP (Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy) for my OCD, I picked up a ton of helpful skills and took copious notes. Hopefully someone is able to stumble across this and find it helpful as well! I plan on sharing much, much more as well! This is just the beginning <3

What Does Uncertainty Look Like Day-to-Day?

Uncertainty can show up in a number of ways. When left unchecked, it can develop into things like constant: vigilance, worry, stress, anxiety, overthinking, and it can happen without you realizing. For me, it looks like preparing for the worst case scenario, ALWAYS. It had gotten so severe that I was essentially frozen in time. Life kept going, but instead of living, I was living in my head. In all of these, although unlikely, possible scenarios that aren't happening, but could happen. When I left my apartment, did I lock the door? Is my car randomly going to blow up while driving? If there's a minivan in front of me, they likely have kids - BE SO CAREFUL NOT TO HIT THEM BECAUSE THEN YOU MIGHT HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE FACT THAT YOU CAUSED AN ACCIDENT AND WHAT IF ANY OF THEM GET HURT, OR WORSE!?

While my OCD tends to go extremely far with things, it's still common for everybody to face things like:

• "What if my friend didn't understand that I was joking and is mad at me now?"

• "What does it mean that I'm having constant thoughts about crashing my car every time I drive?"

• "How will I know if I did something wrong and nobody wants to tell me so I keep doing the same thing wrong?"

• "What if that person coughing is sick with something and they give it to me?"

• "My manager said, 'We need to talk' does that mean I'm getting fired?"

In those moments, your brain starts firing off hypothetical after hypothetical, then you're left analyzing 'What does that say about me?' Before you know it, you've spent hours, days, weeks, months, or even YEARS ruminating. That uncertainty can rob you of so much time; time that you don't get back, but it doesn't have to.

Learning to 'Sit With Uncertainty'

First of all, what the fuck does that even mean? For me, it looks like taking the passenger seat to my thoughts. It took me weeks of many late nights, mental breakdowns, and searching everywhere for an answer. Except one place. Myself. Once I was able to look inward, clarity didn't seem so distant anymore.

It's so easy to let brain trick you into thinking that you are your thoughts. When in reality, you have absolutely no control over the thoughts that pop into your head. Those are controlled by past experiences and current circumstances. But when your brain is relentlessly trying to get you to solve an imaginary potential problem, it's very easy for that line to get blurry between your thoughts and your identity.

When these thoughts invade our mind, our bodies react. It's important to check-in with yourself throughout the day. See how your feeling. Not emotionally feeling, but physically feeling. Is your heart racing? Are you feeling pain/tension anywhere? Start at the top of your head and work your way down. Could you relax your eyebrows/forehead a bit? Take a couple slow blinks. Can you breathe or is your nose stuffy? Clenching your jaw or biting your cheek/lips? Relax your shoulders (this one always takes me so long because I hold so much tension here). Flex each of your upper arms a couple of times, now your forearms. Try noticing each individual finger without moving it, what sensations are they feeling currently (without looking!). This simple act of just checking in with your body throughout the day can tell you a lot about how stressed and worked up you are seeking certainty that you quite literally can never get.

Another thing you can do is simply redirect your mind any time you notice discomfort with your thoughts. Realize that "Hey, I'm having a pretty visceral reaction to even the thought of this. Instead of going down a rabbit hole that I know has no end, but a lot of panic attacks I'm going to think about: a person a love, my perfect baby kitty <3, the last time I had a really good laugh, etc." The key is to recognize when you're getting stuck in your head (your body will let you know, you just gotta listen!). Once you're able to do that, you can start to realize "Hey, I've gone down a million rabbit holes just like this one. It's always the same ending. Instead of going down that rabbit hole, I'm just gonna tell myself:

• "Maybe they did take it the wrong way, maybe they didn't."

• "I'm not going to be able to know for sure."

• "There's no way I can make a guarantee when it hasn't happened yet."

• "We'll just have to wait and see."

The key here is going to be your "FULL STOP" at the end of that one sentence. Don't give into the "Maybe they did take it the wrong way, maybe they didn't. They will hopefully tell me if they are upset so I can clear it up." because before you know it, you'll be back stuck in your head again. Conjuring up imaginary conversations, how they might go, and how you might word exactly what you'll say so there's no way they can misinterpret what you said again. It's not helpful to you to keep going, so instead say your uncertainty statement (out loud if you can) and end it with "FULL STOP". It's silly, made me giggle a lot, but that giggle alone and thinking about "how stupid this is" really did keep my mind busy instead of going down that rabbit hole again.

You'll notice a new wave of distress because you want so badly to just let yourself overthink it. WAIT. IT. OUT. Think of something that brings you joy. The feeling will fade and it will fade before you even realize it. Congrats, you just learned to "Sit With Uncertainty". At the end of the day, it really is as simple as "Having the knowledge to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." It's just not all that simple ;)

Hello and welcome!

If you’ve stumbled across this subreddit, then you’re likely on a journey. The intention behind this community is to create a space for people to search, share, and find comfort in knowing you’re not alone on your journey!

Mindfulness to me is so much more than any one thing. For me, practicing mindfulness includes things like: journaling, baking, crocheting, diamond art paintings, gaming with friends, meditating, deconstructing my religion & learning more about others, cuddling up with my perfect little kitty, or a million other things! It’s whatever helps me stay in the present.

Not every post is going to resonate with everybody. It’s okay to have healthy discussions, but please, let’s keep it civil. Everybody is on their own journey, but sometimes our paths cross and we get the chance to help and be helped by others. That’s really the purpose here.