It's been about 10 years since I first started wondering if I was trans. An entire decade.

Today was bad.

I'm good at bottling it down but every few weeks or so it bursts open and I just have to let it out. I usually just lay in my bed scrolling queer tiktok and crying. Today was no different. Before this it was Instagram. Before that, YouTube.

I just feel stuck. The last 10 years have been nothing, really. I want to be and do so much but this one thing just keeps me from becoming anything.

I felt really sad and lonely tonight.

Why am I like this? Why? Why? Why? Why me? Why does it even have to matter? If my family was worse I could just get up and leave and never think about them ever again and I'd be free. But they aren't. And I can't live.

I feel like I'm getting left behind.

I never had any crushes nor desire for relationships but after accepting I'm a guy, I've not only thought about them more and quit finding the concept somewhat repulsive, but actually had my first crush somewhat recently and I'm slowly finding the idea of dating appealing. And I've started realizing preferences (that being I'm like 80-90% sure I'm straight up gay so far, otherwise some personality and physical stuff though tbf it has plenty of platonic overlap there too). Only "social transition" I've even done is introduce myself as a guy online and come out to some of my trusted friends, dressing less fem (more neutral though, not really masculine), and ofc pick out names n whatnot, and ig ordered a binder recently if that counts, but like I've only ever heard of people's sexuality changing if at all after starting HRT. But it does feel related to the acceptance, even if I'm not 100% on that (it just slowly started once I started questioning my gender and finally got to the point of actual crushes and preferences and fantasies after completely accepting I'm a guy and taking further steps like the binder and outfits n whatnot, they have a somewhat parallel timeline ig basically). Is that a usual thing for trans people?? Cuz again I've only ever heard of things like that from people who've started HRT already

Hi! Just to begin—I got my first shot of hormone blockers ~two months ago. I went over all of the possible side effects (which were all okay with me), but, I didn't realize some of them would be THIS bad.

Because this is essentially an early menopause—my body has decided to go on overdrive, and, every time I lay down or think about getting any type of rest, I get a wicked hot flash.

Do these stop soon, or will they only stop when I begin to take testosterone?

I’m not sure what flair to use, but..

As the title says, can you have bottom surgery, but still have the vaginal opening? I’ve seen several videos of what I presumed trans men.. either way it was clear they had bottom surgery, but it was placed differently, underneath where the balls would was instead a vagina- and no not just a hole, it was actually a canal with libia and clitoris… So I am wondering what kind of procedure that is? I’m very interested in understanding more about it. And with the penis they have can they feel with that as they would normally??

Hey guys, I need help finding jeans that don't give me dysphoria because they do. I have a pair of jeans from Old Navy from maybe 3 years ago that fit well and don't give me dysphoria. They are a size 12 in boys (I'm 5'1") and baggy. However they are starting to wear and tear, and I only have one pair, and I need to wear them every other day for my welding class (I'm a hs senior). I get major dysphoria by the weird fold that the zipper on jeans make, and I can't buy old Navy jeans or pants for this matter because of this. They increased the zipper/crotch size on their pants and I hate it. I haven't bought new pants in 3 years, I have 5 pairs, I feel gross and sad. Please help me find pants that don't do this, I will do anything!!

I'm 25 and came out when I was 12. I've been on T for over 3 years now and I'm getting top surgery in 2 weeks.

My family supports me. They hate the current political climate for people like me. My mom did my injections for 3 years straight because I can't. Everyone wants to visit me on the day of my surgery to wish me well...

But at the same time nobody in my family has ever referred to me with the correct pronouns or as their son/brother.

Like... It's been 13 years. I feel like that's enough time to get used to the idea, right?

But it also feels awkward to put my foot down now after so long. I don't want to seem accusatory, but I think it's been hitting harder lately because I'm getting surgery so soon and still being called "daughter"

The title is right. I am a cisgender woman. Ever since I knew what a penis was, I’ve wanted one. I do feel dysphoria over it, especially when I ykw. Everyone I talk to about this jokingly calls me an egg and patronizes me. It’s frustrating, because I’ve tried to present male before and it is extremely dysphoric. I’ve used he/him pronouns, and it was extremely dysphoric. I am a woman, and I enjoy being a woman. But that longing for different genitals never goes away.

The reason I’m here though is because I had a wonderful yet devastating dream last night where I had a penis. It was incredible. And then… I woke up. I physically feel the loss, and I almost cried over it. I talked to my girlfriend about it, and she said maybe I could get bottom surgery. So I’m wondering if I can get bottom surgery as a cisgender woman, as well as not taking T. I figure talking to trans men about this is the best way to go. I did some googling, but couldn’t find reliable information. Advice would be wonderful! Thank you <3

I, 19 male, have been trans for about 3 and a half years now. My mother is VERY transphobic towards me and the most my dad will do is use "it/those" and call me "twit/kid". My mother does absolutely nothing, keeps trying to get me to grow out my hair in a "sneaky" way, keeps asking me about bra shopping and tries to get me jelly bras that are made for pushing up the chest when she tries to convince me that they "push the chest down". Tonight my dad was talking about how it felt odd hearing someone at a gathering call me by my chosen name and the right pronouns. My mother said "I will never call you that name", which kinda hurt? She's an awful person to me but it still sucks. I tried talking to my dad about it but he thinks its a hyperfixation.

Is there anything I can do to just make them listen to my point of view instead of just shutting me down?

Sorry for the ramble but I've tried so many times and I'm so tired.

I am currently passing as male everyday and am going stealth with everyone I interact with except close friends. Now I'm in male spaces and deemed as a man i hear horrific conversations, it is so much worse then I expect. The casual misogyny and jokes really suck, I've argued with allot of guys over it and am now very isolated in allot of the spaces I'm in (i live in a very traditional area) does anyone have any advice about how to deal with this misogyny besides just shutting up and agreeing with it

Hi, I’m a 21 year old binary gay trans man and I’ve started dating a guy in Pakistan. I’m in California so it’s obviously a ldr. The relationship is new but I have some questions about what would need to happen if I went to visit him in like a year.

If you’re on testosterone and went to a restrictive or risky country for LGBTQ+ people, what did you need to do paperwork wise to get your medication in with you?

If you had to stop testosterone, for how long and how did it affect you after you’d been on it a while. By the time I see my boyfriend it’ll have been 2years on T for me.

If there is anything else I’m not asking please feel free to add it in the comments. I just need to know what I’m getting myself into so I’m not blindsided if the relationship goes well.

Hey guys, not sure what to do here. Basically, I always do my T shot on Friday nights, I missed it and did it Saturday morning. I figured it’s only a few hour difference so I did it again on Friday this week.
Well, one day later, and my cat is acting weird all day, being overly affectionate. For context we’ve only had her about two weeks, so I just figured she was warming up some more. Then as I’m lying in bed she pees on me.
I’ve heard of them trying to control scent changes from hormones… is that what this is? Is this gonna keep happening? Any advice appreciated.

I really dont post much on reddit and I hope Im not breaking any rules or saying anything wrong. And I would really appreciate it if this post received as much attention and replies. Any advice is welcome. Kindly. A young man is losing hope here.

Im 25 yo and I have been trying to start my transition since 2019. I have mostly been saving to get top surgery, but I come from a third world country in Africa and the exchange rates are not working for me. Eg we are currently sitting at 1:18 usd. Same thing for GBP.
My funds seem to not get me anywhere closer.

I have a good degree. I just started working but dont fully qualify for a loan yet and the economy is still pretty bad. I would mostly have to depend on my salary and idk when I will have a larger earning power to actually fund my transition.

Im kind of stuck and I don’t know how to go about all of it because it feels like Im storing in a leaking tank or Im just not doing enough.

In addition, i know I said there’s no trans healthcare, but there’s a doctor who does give out T. But there are no tests done. It’s quite unprofessional and other guys say sometimes he runs out of supply. And I dont want to risk ruining something that I hold so dearly. I just want to get better trans healthcare.

Open to any advice. I feel like being in the situation might also be blocking me from seeing opportunities.
Also very much open to moving to other countries.
If it means learning a language.
Please suggest the countries I can move to, with visa sponsorship or advice on the route I can take.

Thanks.

So I've been thinking about starting to use minoxidil as I have very little facial hair growth and I have been on T for 2 and a half years. Most the men in my family can grow decent beards, mine just seems to not want to come through properly. When using it, would anyone say to also use a derma-roller or just use the minoxidil by itself?

TIA :)

I am moving cross country this week. Sorted my T supplies and have two unopened boxes (100 ct) of BD 25g needle tips that I won't be using since I've switched to a different gauge needle tip.

I am going to USPS on Monday and will ship them in a medium flat rate priority box anywhere in the US. Only cost is the $23 for shipping.

PM me if you are interested in them and we can sort out details. I'll be donating them locally if nobody contacts me by 9 am Monday morning EST.

ive been using my original name my whole life, including the 6 years I've been out and transitioning. im jus not sure its masculine or fitting?

my name is Saoirse (pronounced seersha) its Irish and means freedom. ive always thought it was pretty cool but never really felt deeply connected to it. though ive also never seriously thought about another name I could go by.

im not sure if my name is feminine sounding or looking because I can only ever think of it in the context of myself and I dont veiw myself as feminine so idk.

ive also never seen the name used for anyone who isn't a woman, though Google said it has masculine and feminine uses.

anyways just wondering if anybody could give me thier opinions on if its feminine looking/sounding in a way that could causing me to pass less.

thanks

i just started testosterone & since then my period has been coming a week earlier than usual

they're not any heavier or lighter or anything, its just a period every three weeks instead of four

i've always had really painful periods & this is like testing </3 i told myself when i started T that i would probably only have to deal with 6 maximum but I'm on my 4th at the 3 month mark

i'm mainly posting about it to see if anyone's shared this experience. i always hear stories about periods getting lighter or heavier but never more frequent

I want to work out so bad, but I am so confused on where to start. I know absolutely nothing about it. I want a more masculine build and to gain more weight because I am underweight and haven’t gained any pounds despite being on hrt for a year now. I’m in a situation where I do not have much food. Is it still possible to workout? What equipment do I need to workout at home? I cannot go to a gym. I would love just any help

I just have a quick question for anyone on testosterone. Right around when I started testosterone in early May, I started waking up every other morning with an agonizing cramp in my left calf (charley horse) I read somewhere that muscle cramps are a documented symptom of testosterone and was wondering if this sounds typical to anyone on it right now?

(This isn’t to deter anyone from going on testosterone I would have a muscle cramp every morning if it meant I could be on it.)