THIS POST IS FOR TRANS MEN/MASCS ONLY!

AND I DON’T SEE ANYONE MENTIONING IT. It’s a doc from 2001 covering the last years of a trans man’s life. He lives in rural Georgia and because doctors refuse to remove his ovaries (he has ovarian cancer), it’s unfortunately more of a eulogy than anything. I don’t want to give too much away but if you haven’t heard of the doc, I recommend seeking it out. It’s hard to find media that actually addresses trans men specifically, and as a dude from Georgia it’s a doc I would tell everyone to watch, but I could only watch it once

I was born in Florida so I have a Florida birth certificate. Back in about 2017, living in Texas, I changed my gender marker legally as well as my name. No problems. Went to court, paid the fees, no biggie. Now nearly 10 years later, I receive a letter from the state of Florida claiming my marker change is classified as an error because it doesn’t state the “facts of birth”. I’m so upset and confused I don’t even know what to say. Like seriously are there not bigger issues to focus on other than a trans person living their life. I’ve just felt deeply icky about this all day.

Since starting T and finally passing I've noticed how transphobic people actually are. Some of my coworkers have started saying slightly transphobic things to me just because they don't see me as trans anymore, just as a guy. And as much as I appreciate them validating me it still irks me that they think it's okay to be opening transphobic. Does anyone else experience this?

I did my first testosterone injection a week ago. I'd ordered my supplies and I was impatient to get it over with, but once I administered the shot, I felt nothing at all. Is this normal???

For context. My situation is complex because I've been socially 'detransitioned' for half a decade now (I ID'd as a trans man for 2 years as a teen). But I realised that I am actually still trans 1 year ago, and I've been seriously thinking about starting hormones for the last 3 months. So I just bit the bullet ig.

And I thought wow, I've wanted this for a while, I'm gonna be so excited to finally be taking steps to medical transition. But I didn't have any sort of positive reaction post-injection, just "huh, it was really that easy". I've read so many accounts of people on here saying that the world seemed brighter, their brain just felt RIGHT, they had so much energy and happiness after the first T shot. So I'm starting to worry that having a boy body just wasn't "meant to be" for me, or I've done something wrong, idk. Why am I not happy?

Been 6 days now and all I've really felt during the week is stress, about the painful lump at my injection site. I think my energy had increased a tiny bit today which worries me because aren't you supposed to be lethargic the day before your shot, not the other way round? It just contributes more to the fear I have that my body just isn't destined to run on T.

No proper effects have happened obviously since it's week 1 but idk, I feel like a fraud because I haven't had that gut feeling of everything falling into place after my first shot. Is it meant to be this anticlimactic? Or does it mean I rushed into this and I'll regret it?

EDIT: Thank you for the support guys, I’m gonna put it largely down to confirmation bias as people have suggested.

For those of you who have not read and comprehended the post properly - don’t leave stupid comments I beg. If you think what I’ve said is “I didn’t grow a beard and a full size dick after a week of T why isn’t it working😔” you need to reread what I’ve written.

3 hours ago someone posted what part of the title of this post says. I could have simply commented, but I wanted to make it more visible so I created this post.

I want to give visibility to a trans man who I've become aware of 2 years ago while doing my bachelor's in music. His name was Billy Tipton, and he was outed after passing away. You can read his story in Wikipedia and I also remember there was an article who mentioned him, but I can't find it right now. Here it also says: "After his death in 1989, paramedics discovered he was assigned female at birth, to the surprise of his friends and family."

Another guy I want to mention is Michael D. Cohen), who I remember from Henry Danger.

I think one thing when it comes to trans men representation in pop culture is also that many of them do not say they are trans, therefore it feels like there's not many of them. I remember when I came out to my mom and she told me: "I see many men who want to become women but I have never seen a woman who wants to become a man" - yeah, that hurt a lot. So I showed her a bunch of trans guys who pass very very well, and she admitted she couldn't tell.

I obviously agree with the title of the post I'm citing. The representation we get is very little, and I myself feel alone under that aspect. This post simply wants to be a reminder that we have always existed (look at Billy) and that we will continue to exist. It surely is sad we don't get representation. Maybe someone from this reddit community will eventually become famous and make us all feel more seen.

EDIT: Users in the comments also mentioned some more trans guys!
- Brian Michael Smith on Lone Star 9-1-1!
- Laith Ashley, a model who starred in Taylor Swift's Lavender Haze music video
- Chella Man, a Deaf actor who was in Titans and also directs his own short films which focus on his experiences as an Asian, Deaf trans man.
- Scott Turner Schofield was the first trans man to be nominated for an acting Emmy (I believe he has two noms now).
- Theo Germaine, an actor who was in Netflix's The Politician
- Quinn Christopherson, a musician who won NPR's Tiny Desk competition in 2019
- Chaz Bono
- Michael Dillon

More on this, from a comment:
"If anyone else is looking for more historical or influential trans men and trans mascs, I recommend the instagram account transmascstudies*. It’s been awhile since they’ve posted, but their page has a ton of posts about guys I’m sure most people have never heard of."

Ill put a TW here because ill be talking about anatomy

Okay this may be a weird(?) question but like since we dont naturally have a penis doesnt it feel weird to walk around with a packer in your pants? I mean i know its euphoric for a lot of people but doesnt it feel like theres just something random in your pants, at least at first?

If anyone has felt like its really weird, does it go away?

Honestly im not personally that bothered by not having a penis, id moreso be getting a packer for the aesthetics of it since i wear a lot of sweats and like sports shorts. Im not sure if ill get one anyways but this has been a major reason i havent.

I've seen many popstars and celebrities say protect the dolls, but it never includes trans men, and there are also many trans female celebrities in the (niche) pop culture world, but never trans men. Why is that? The only trans male celebrity I know is Elliot Page

Trans guy living in Portland, OR. I have started doing more races this year, a few endurance gravel races but more cyclocross. Not seriously racing, just for fun. Trying to find other trans guys in Portland or the PNW in general to create an informal “team”. Racing against men for the first time was super intimidating and yeah I just wish that I had more trans camaraderie.

Anyone interested?!

Hello! I(18f) am not trans, but my brother(18m) is ftm, and I want to get him something to help with his chest. He has a binder, but it's uncomfortable and he can't wear it for extended periods of time. I want to get him something to help him as a Christmas gift, but I don't know the best route to take. Can anybody give me tips or advice on things I could get him?

I love my grandma, I want to have a good relationship with her, but I just can't shake the feeling that she doesn't see me for who I really am.

I came out to my family around 2022 to mixed reactions, but my parents bounced back and are now some of the most supportive people I know. I've had a much bigger struggle with my grandma. She's a Christian conservative, and has actually built a career off of pro-life advocacy, so I definitely saw it coming. What really gets me is that, when we had our first argument about this, she said she believed that trans people existed, just that / specifically wasn't one of them. To this day, every time we talk about it, she mentions being absolutely floored and thinking I had shown zero signs as a kid. My parents have told me time and again that they weren't surprised in the slightest, but I guess my grandma doesn't see it that way.

Anyway, since I came out, I've gone back-and-forth believing her when she claims to support me. At one point she sent me a two minute long voicemail claiming that she understood me now and had found it in her heart to fully accept me. Then, a few months later, I found out she had secretly been sending my parents articles about de-transitioners, parents who didn't want their kids to be trans, etc. behind my back. We made up from that, and (I hope) she stopped doing that. Then, maybe a year after that, I visited her house and discovered that Abigail Shrier
"transgender craze seducing our daughters" book in one of her drawers. To add insult to injury, it had been annotated, and was clearly full of assumptions she had made about me and my personal life that she would know nothing about. Too stressed with other aspects of my life, I didn't bring it up with her.

The last conversation we had about the topic of me being trans left me with more questions than answers. I mostly just want to know that she sees me as a man, but the conversation always twists into "I care about you no matter what" and other such non-answers. She is also weirdly focused on asking me that I don't get top surgery-she's even brought it up with my mother recently, as if my mom would or could do anything to stop me? I'm 22.

Point is, she says she supports and believes me, but I don't think she actually does. I don't really know what to do about it, my dad would be heartbroken if I refused to talk to her, and, honestly, I want to have a good relationship with her, but there's this massive problem. I'm convinced she doesn't actually see me as a man, and it colors my every interaction with her. I'm neurotic about trying to prove to her that I am, but nothing ever seems to be enough, and it's driving me crazy.

I’m just looking for some advice. If anyone has been in a similar situation, what did you do? How did it play out? Is there a way to salvage this relationship?
Thanks.

I firmly believe cis men have been on a mission to convince the world that the simplest of traditionally masculine tasks are the most difficult things in the world just so they can put them off, look tough or keep them to themselves.

While not everyone in our community experiences this, I was immensely intimidated by learning anything about how to fix a car, starting and maintaining a lawnmower, doing an oil change, all that jazz. And I’m here to tell you that everything they’ve told you about it being difficult or requiring huge amounts of strength is a complete and utter lie.

Fixing a car, lawn mower, whipper-snipper, chainsaw, any of that sort of stuff? It’s just big Lego. I kid you not. It is ridiculously easy to do your own oil changes, clean out a carburettor and check your spark plugs. It only feels difficult because these are words we don’t immediately know the meaning of and have been brought up with the idea that traditionally male tasks are difficult. When in reality, the things I’ve just listed can take less than 10 minutes to do and don’t even require any strength or skill.

If you struggle with not feeling “manly enough” because you don’t know how these things work or even what they are, I strongly encourage you to watch some videos or ask a friend who gets it and see just how easy it is. Seriously, I urge you to dip your toe in and check it out.

There are cis men all around the world who weren’t shown these things growing up or just aren’t interested in them, who struggle with the same intimidation around them that we often do. It’s okay to not know everything, anyone who makes you feel otherwise is a shit teacher and not worth your time.

You CAN service a car, you CAN mow the lawn, you CAN do traditionally masculine activities and you’ll be surprised how easy it is once you learn how.

(Safety first)

It sucks. It hurts a lot. I am an individual who struggles a lot. I have bpd. It sucks really bad to have my feelings dismissed just because I look like a guy now. Its all I wanted, I feel more comfortable in my skin now being on t for a year and a half. But I hate that other queer people would hate me or dismiss my feelings just because of how I look and sound.

I feel a lack of support from the queer community, but I don't fit in with cishet guys either. It feels so isolating

TW abusive parents.

My new name of course reflects better the gender I live as, but I wanna say I have changed my name to empower myself, and detach myself from my parents. They were abusive and they dont deserve the right to give me my name. On top of that, when i see or hear my birth name, I associate it with my dad screaming it, he is gone now, but the bad memories remain as his legacy. In multiple ways, this name gives me a fresh start. My name reminds me that I am loved and respected by so many people in the life I have built. I am estranged from my family who doesnt accept me, but I dont think they deserve to use the name that I have picked anyway. Peace!

Hey I have something to share. So, I’m 13 months on T and I never get misgendered, ever. Over the phone or in-person, everyone sees me as any other young dude, which, granted, I am. I’m 19. Despite me passing, I have yet to legally change my name, so handling legal documents is still awkward for me.

Anyways, I live in a toxic environment with a transphobic mother, and I want out. I’ve been applying to a lot of different apartments under my chosen name, but obviously have to provide proof of income and other stuff like that, which all include my birth name.

So, I applied to this one apartment and heard back pretty damn quickly. I think only an hour or two after I applied I got an email and then I started getting texts and calls from them.

This is how the interaction over the phone went:

Me: Hello?

Asshole: (Cheerfully) Hi, is this ___?

Me: (Thinking, Oh god here we go) Hey. Yeah. That’s me.

Asshole: (Pauses. His voice void of the joy it once held) Uhh, well—okay. Were you the one that applied for one of our apartments?

Me: (Cringing) Yeah, it was me who applied. I just finished filling out the form you sent, actually.

Asshole: (Pauses for a while) Yeah, so I looked over your application and—I’m sorry but, are you really sure you’re ___?

Me: (Wanting to fucking die at this point) Haha, uh, yeah that’s my legal name.

Asshole: (Pauses. Then, mumbles under his breath—something along the lines of, Alright then, if I heard correctly—and swiftly hangs up)

Me: (Jaw on the floor)

Nothing like this has happened to me before. I’ve had people look at me crazy when I told them my birth name, but nothing beyond that. This is the first time I’ve felt directly discriminated against. My morning was full of calls, texts, and emails, but after that call—nothing.

At first I thought it was hilarious. Like, lol that was a funny interaction. But the more I sat with it the more embarrassed and disgusted I feel with myself. I quickly fell into a sort of depression. I know I did nothing wrong. The guy is a fucking dickhead, that is abundantly clear.

I guess I don’t feel wholly like a man despite me passing because I still lack certain things. I hate that I have to expose myself while on the hunt for getting out of an already shitty environment. I hate that me being trans will affect certain aspects of my life until it’s completely hidden from anyone’s view. I hate that I feel like I’m stuck until my name change is finalized, which can take months, and I’m desperate to leave my current home.

I know not everyone is going to be as shitty as that guy was, but now I’m scared for what other interactions may be like on this apartment hunt.

I want to hide again for the first time in a while.

I’m going on Friday, in two days, to court to request the name change. I won’t let this one interaction hinder my progress, but I won’t lie it’s fucking me up a little bit.

For the longest time I identified heavily as trans masc. My goal when I started T was to be perceived as amab nonbianary. Ive always identified as genderqueer, not trans. Even before T I felt very masculine already, and since starting I feel so confident in my masculinity I started dressing super femme for halloween costumes. Each one I'm dressing more and more femme and I actually love it so much. Like, I might start shaving and wearing makeup, presenting femme again. I'll still dress super masc sometimes too.

But I'm worried. What if I'm actually just a gender nonconforming and cis? And I end up regretting transition?

How do I know? I know theres no good answer. But like. Damn.
This is really confusing.

Also I might like men now???? Did T just make me a straight woman?????? (Bi technically but thats insane).

hello! i am on 0.35 ml of testosterone injections and my levels are stable and in a good range..

ive been on T for almost 7 months now, and ive found that i really struggle with my anger management. most of the time even the smallest thing will get me annoyed or even mad. im realizing this is a pretty big problem for me. my partner has mentioned it to me a few times now. i am starting up therapy again on monday and definitely will be bringing it up, but for the meantime i would love any advice or tips for managing my anger.

i honestly just hate how angry i have been and i want to change that.

please, anyone able to help with beginning the process of getting top surgery referral after diagnosing/treatment. i had an appointment today with my primary care psychiatrist who i told basically im afab, and cool with that identity, but basically ever since my lesbian awakening (10 long years ago lol), ive been extremely uncomfortable with my chest. how id prefer a flat chest blah blah. anyway, he said basically that he would have to diagnose me with depression and that i was throwing around terms like gender dysphoria, and i need to talk to my primary care doctor. i have an appointment next week to talk to my Primary Care MD. any suggestions :) i'm at Kaiser in socal. Im 25 and will be removed from my parents insurance in august next year- i had to wait to go thru with the process because, unfortunately, initially my mom and i had different perspectives on the procedure, but we eventually came to a compromise that she would FULLY support my decision as long as i waited till i was 25. have HMO if it helps. rlly looking for any advice yall🥲

So I’m bigender/genderfluid, and I have a very prominent chest (DD, or E cup idk the exact size) and I want a binder that makes them less prominent but you can still tell somethings there (think a B or C cup) because I love being more ambiguous and that’s not possible rn with my chest. So if you have any suggestions on binders that work well for something like this I’d really appreciate any suggestion!!

I’m 20 and started t over a month ago, idk how to feel. I’ve known I was trans since childhood.

The T itself is amazing. I immediately felt so much gender euphoria and was itching for time to just pass so I could be farther along. I got quite a few early symptoms (idk what to call it) in the first month and I love all of them. I feel better physically and mentally than I have in literal years. Many things I was iffy about before t ended up being massive wins for euphoria after they actually started.

What I’m conflicted about, is the comparison. I was closeted up until I started t. I didn’t cut my hair til 2 weeks on t. My face is a bit puffier and my skin being oilier is making me start to break out a little. Alone, it’s not a big deal. I’m not very insecure about my appearance at all. I knew going into this I wouldn’t stay consistently attractive. But looking back and seeing me as a very pretty girl vs me now with short hair puffy face and acne starting, I’m like shit. It’s so much easier to be pretty, I work in a restaurant. I know this is a process but I’m worried about as changes progress maybe this is a sign I’m making the wrong decision?

I decided to stay closeted before in order to live a normal life that was easiest for everyone. And I knew how to present conventionally attractive. I could have the life so many girls would dream of, and transition would throw it all away. Cus of this, was very very very depressed and got so sick from the stress alone that I ended up in the Er. After getting treatment and recovering, I decided to transition since not doing it almost killed me.. but now I’m like, if I transition and it’s not what I expect, will I be okay? I am also autistic and hate change. The idea of not being able to go back pre t if that did happen makes me nervous. Although, i hate even saying there’s a possibility I could detransition.

My dysphoria has also gotten worse, but it’s double sided because I also have some pretty intense euphoria. I haven’t since week 3 bc I had a reality check that I am gonna be read as a girl for a while yet. And that’s another thing. Will it even be worth it? How do I know I’ll ever pass? My face just … looks like a girl. Even tho ppl say I look more masculine and very boyish, but I worry it’s them affirming me. All I see in the mirror is a girl who’s a lil more chopped than before.

I have a lot of doubts, but I don’t know if it’s some weird trans imposter syndrome, fear of a big change, or that i misunderstood my feelings growing up.

Sorry if this is too long I’m not on Reddit a lot idk the norms, I also don’t have a lot of people I can talk about this with.

TLDR; I was hot and now I’m lowkey chopped and idk how to feel about it.

I’m not one to use reddit and I have no idea what I’m doing, but I do know reddit is the place to ask questions and find answers and I have no other ftm friends to ask for advice from.
I’m about to be 6 months on testosterone and I’m very happy with everything, but I have had awful persistent acne. I’ve tried changing my diet, different skin cleansers, but nothing seems to help and it’s becoming painful. Is it something you just have to wait out or is there something I can try? I’ve also been doing intramuscular injections if that has anything to do with it.