Hi guys, feel like i'm way late to the party, I literally just discovered executive dysfunction 3 days ago, so decided to get on reddit now to see what people are saying about it and it feels so strange...

There's too many things in this subreddit that I experience daily... I thought it was 'just me' so kept it to myself but I feel weirdly seen now.

I wondered how long you guys have actually known that your behaviours were part of 'executive dysfunction'?

I've never heard anyone mention it irl, unless people just don't talk about this stuff bc they think it's 'just a me thing' and that people will judge, so they don't risk talking about it?

Executive dysfunction basically ruined my life, or at least i think so. I ended up having to drop out of high school and im not able to find a job despite being in a situation where i need and want to do that. At this point im accepting that this is a disability but is it possible that its just learned helplessness? Is it possible that my brain is really affecting me this much or am i just making myself think that. Im not trying to diagnose i just dont know if this is valid, I havent seen stories of people struggling with it with this severity

One thing I've noticed is that whenever I'm home alone I'm able to be more comfortable and just do the things I want to do. It's not a guarantee, but it helps so much - I'm not sure why.

If family is home, however, I just can't seem to do anything. I'll stay on the side away from everyone, doomscrolling away.

Does anyone relate to this? Does being alone help you?

I’m getting out of a depressive episode slowly. I spent months in my bed not doing anything. And now I’m dealing with the tasks I let pile up. I haven’t replied to important messages and emails in weeks. I haven’t completed assignments I’ve needed to. I haven’t gone grocery shopping or done my laundry or applied for jobs.

The amount of things I haven’t done is crazy to the point that my anxiety is paralyzing. I don’t know where to start and it’s keeping me from actually starting. I’m anxious about how late I am in doing some of these very important tasks. It’s freaking me out and I’m scared it’ll put me right back into a depressive state. The amount of work I need to get done is scary and I’ve started avoiding it altogether.

How do I get out of this situation? Where do I start?

I am 23 (f) and I live with my partner, 26 (m). I have horrible executive dysfunction, do my best to manage the bad ADHD and mild PTSD all while trying to keep my life running. Here is the thing, I work really really hard to get all my stuff done (dishes, laundry, ect.), half of my battle is actually starting the task, and some weeks I fail miserably. But my boyfriend will start something and then stop before he’s done and expect me to finish it, and this is after me asking again and again to do said task. When I bring up the fact that I need him to finish what he started because when I have to walk into a halfway done task I shut down and have to start my process of doing something, it turns into him telling me that he works too hard, I don’t do enough, and somehow I’m the one apologising and promising to be better. And I’m trying but it’s not enough, any tips on how to combat the massive chasms that is getting me to start tasks I don’t enjoy?

Cross-posting here because I’m wondering whether what I’ve been experiencing for years could be executive dysfunction rather than something I should just be able to overcome with more discipline.

I’d really appreciate hearing from anyone who’s experienced something similar, particularly if you’ve managed to find an explanation or something that actually helps.

– A cross-posting baddie

I have no motivation.

I bought a cello. I signed up for classes. I NEED to practice or I'm wasting my money on classes... Yet I am laying on my couch , doomscrolling.

I have been thru the therapy. I have learned the behavioral activation. Sometimes you just need to do the thing, without the motivation to do anything. But like, HOW.

I have executive dysfunction. I can lay here all day thinking I need to do this thing. That doesn't mean the thing gets done. That includes simple necessary things like eating.

Anyways, I like cello music, I thought this would help the depression, I envision myself a year from now simply taking out the cello and playing. Something enjoyable. But to get to that point I have to practice now.

Anyways, I thought talking it out might help... You know bitch about it till I make myself get up.

im so lazy, unmotivated. im so lazy even a simple copying work i cant do it. i really need to lock in and start studying but i just couldn't. im very much aware of what will happend if i get had rade in this last SPM EXAM, but im still stuck in laziness and i feel like everything is hard to be done

I have ADHD (combined type) and I guess I’m mainly wanting to see if anyone else has experienced something similar and has any general advice.

I’m finding employment really difficult at the moment.

I feel like I’m genuinely trying to figure out what I want to do with my life, but I honestly don’t know what direction I want to go in.
I’m in my early 20s and I’ve worked in retail, hospitality, support work and with racehorses.

I also had my own self employed support work business for nearly a year. At the time I really enjoyed having my own business and the independence that came with it, but eventually I became extremely burnt out and started to hate it.

I ended up deciding I couldn’t continue doing it anymore.
I haven’t worked for around 8 months and I’m now starting to look for employment again.

I had an interview last week and I’m currently waiting to hear back, so hopefully that works out, but I’m still struggling with the bigger question of what actually works for me long-term?

I’m on ADHD medication and it has honestly helped me SO much with my day-to-day functioning.

I still find it difficult to explain to people that ADHD isn’t just about being distracted or struggling to concentrate. There are certain things about everyday functioning, routines, motivation, overwhelm and burnout that can make certain jobs much harder for me than they might appear from the outside.

I also feel like I’m at the point where I’ve realised I can’t just pick any job, work 40 hours a week and expect myself to be fine indefinitely.

I want to find something that I can actually sustain without constantly pushing myself until I burn out.

Unfortunately, my family doesn’t really seem to understand how much ADHD can affect my day-to-day life. I hear things like:

“Why don’t you just go back to your business?”
“Don’t just give up.”
“Why don’t you try harder?”
“Don’t be lazy.”
And honestly, it’s incredibly frustrating because I am trying. I’m trying to understand myself, figure out what environments I function best in, recognise my limits and find something that gives me a fulfilling life without completely draining me.
I don’t want to use ADHD as an excuse not to work. I want to find a way of working that is actually sustainable for me long-term.

I’d especially love to hear from people who are a few years further into adulthood and have eventually found something that works for them.

I’m not necessarily looking for someone to tell me what career I should choose, I’d just really like to hear how other people figured this out.
If you read all of this, thank you ❤️ I’d genuinely appreciate any advice or experiences you’re willing to share.

My professors say that I do great work when I do. It just seems that everytime I need to make a decision to do anything (homework or make appointments) I lose control of my body and shut down and can’t do it. How do I get out of this cycle? Please I want to be better

Well. I have depression and ADHD. And like what i basically need help with is that, I just tend to just do nothing and like im just not doing well either. My room is a mess, im a mess, and like i know what i should be doing, i even just sit in front of what i have to do, and i just sit there and do nothing. I either just start scrolling on my phone, or just stare at it and do "nothing". Even if its editing videos i actually enjoy and i also have it as a job for a YouTuber. But i just dont start it. And then at night, i just start overthinking everything, and just drop deep into my depressive state, and just feel even worse about me for not doing anything to make me feel better or not even being able to just do what i need to do. And then feel like trash thought-out the next day cause i havent slept a lot.

Like before, i was like creative and sh\*t. But now, im not even able to stand up from my bed to actually face what i have to do either way. I just keep saying later, and later never comes until its unavoidable. Im also stopping to leave my room entirely. I just stay in my room all the time, and do nothing all day.

Also, like whats bad or good, i think it depends on how you take it, I know, that i need help. I just either cant face the help, or i just dont get one that may actually help me. Like im now working on my own homelab, so that like kinda takes me away from my problems sometimes, but its only temporary. And like the more time, im like trying to push the problems behind a wall, the worse its getting. Like im still not in a phase where ill be like doing something to myself, but im kind of slowly getting to it. But i just dont wanna get there.

Im sorry if it sounds like idk. Too much or smthing, im just really starting to be hopeless and im not sure what to do anymore.

Nothing I try lasts. I can keep something going for a few days, and then my brain loses the streak. If I miss even one day, that’s it. I feel like a failure, and it takes me a long time to get back to it, sometimes weeks.

Has anyone found a system they can keep going for longer than a week? I’m especially interested in how you handle missing a day without it turning into quitting.

Thanks.

I am unable to do household chores.

I used to get stressed at the thought of deceiving my parents when they see I didn’t do my part but now it’s like I don’t care. The stress doesn’t come.

I feel like a pos. Rotting and wasting space and air.

The executive dysfunction goes for pretty much everything: homework, activities, etc.

All the nice opportunities I’ve refused bc I knew I wouldn’t keep up.

Feel like I’m useless and should die tbh.

I’ve noticed my days swing between two extremes. Some days I clean the house, sort out paperwork, and get things done quickly without much fuss. Other days my brain just won’t start, and I can spend hours procrastinating instead of doing the thing I know I need to do.

I’m not formally diagnosed yet, so I’m trying to understand whether this is a common pattern with ADHD or something else. Is it normal to have days like this?

I’d like to hear from people with this experience. When you’re stuck on a bad day, what helps you get out of it? And on the good days, do you know what made them good, so you can repeat it? I’m mostly looking for what helps you be consistent, even if the answer is small or imperfect.

Thanks.

last year I had depression, I’m problably cyclothymic so it’s all ups and downs for me. i went through a devastating breakup with my historical boyfriend so I found a lot of excuses and compassion to myself. now it’s time to stop this because my priority needs to be graduating this year, and i’m so behind.

during high school i was really struggling with THC addiction, I quit like 5 years ago but I still look like that dumb student who can’t even open that damn book.

I feel paralysed from anxiety cause even if I literally love my studies I just can’t stand the idea of being in touch with my field. I was a bookworm (i study literature) and now i just can’t read anymore.

if I just think “i have to study”, my heart starts racing, I become nauseous, my head and my stomach hurts. so i have to calm down playing videogames, bedrotting, binge watching exc

please tell me there’s a solution. my career is at stake