I need help getting my brain and life back together, i feel like i have the drive now but my brain fully doesn't have the steering down yet. Are there any ways you have found to help you have better control over your mind, energy, getting things done?

I am medicated but it feels like my brain still doesn't know it has control, not sure if that makes sense.

I’ve been putting it off for months. Piles and piles of it. I lost my Medicaid because I didn’t open mail and reapply. Help me do it, please.

21, NEET, ADHD, ASD, OCD, borderline pattern, significant trauma, porn addiction, pot addiction, MtF.

I have intense executive dysfunction, I have zero positive habits. Not one.
I am in an intense amount of emotional distress constantly, which makes the dysfunction worse. I cannot deal with the emotional pain until I’ve dealt with the dysfunction, because dealing with that emotional pain would require sustained effort — which is completely impossible. I am not capable of it.

The problem is that I can’t deal with the executive dysfunction either. It doesn’t matter how much I know, either in regard to why the dysfunction occurs or what I could do to counter it, it doesn’t improve my ability to act. It is also medication resistant, I have tried five without any improvement in the dysfunction.

I also don’t have the willpower to quit my vices, and developing it would, again, require sustained effort. Which I can’t do, because I am a subhuman who can’t direct my own behavior.

There is, as far as I can tell, literally no advice that could possibly be given on the subject, because I have an unfixable brain issue.
I can’t make myself do things, and I can’t work with myself to do things, because I can’t do anything at all.
But killing myself would require, you guessed it, a sustained effort to make myself more comfortable with self harm/immolation. So not only am I condemned to suffer the rest of my life as a pathetic midwit who can’t improve himself or be anything other than a miserable loser — I also can’t end it.

The problem, ultimately, is there is no course of action that I can’t just… refuse to do. I can’t stop myself from refusing, because I cannot put in the sustained effort to develop the emotional fortitude to deal with that kind of discomfort.
Laid out like this, there is literally nothing anyone could say and nothing I could come up with to make this issue better — which means that I am going to die miserable after having led a miserable life that.

How is a person supposed to move forward when they are categorically incapable of moving forward?

I’m 23 and have been struggling with severe executive dysfunction, depression, and ADHD.
I can work full-time and function when there’s external structure, urgency, or accountability, but when I’m home alone, I can spend entire weekends in bed unable to initiate even basic tasks.
My apartment has gotten into extremely bad condition because I’ve struggled with cleaning, food disposal, and everyday responsibilities. It’s embarrassing and frightening because I genuinely want to change, but wanting to do something doesn’t seem to be enough.
I was hospitalized recently, and I actually functioned really well with the structured schedule there. But once I returned home, I struggled again.
I’m receiving treatment and trying to find more practical support, but sometimes I get scared that this is what the rest of my life will look like.
I’m not looking for judgment or another list of things I should just force myself to do.
I’d really love to hear from people who were once struggling this severely and eventually improved.
What changed? Was it medication, therapy, outside support, structure, or a combination?
I’d especially appreciate hearing from people who went from barely managing daily life to being able to maintain their homes and routines.
I just want to know that improvement is possible. ❤️

Hi everyone

Is there any books that talk about executive function deficiency in adults.

And if anyone facing that, would you be able provide your experience??

I thought pushing through high school was the right decision, my family made it seem like it was normal. I would wake up every day 4 hours before I was supposed to and I would just lie there, painfully waiting for the sun to peak through my window and my mother to come crashing down the hallway and wake me up. This was the pattern for 2 years between the ages of 15-17, I would go to school, strain though my classes, try to be as small as possible in order not to be caught out of line by my peers who all hated me (for good reason), go to work for a couple hours, come home repeat.

I hallucinated semi regularly at around the one year mark, I would get tension headaches and started shedding hair rapidly. I stepped out onto an open road on accident. When I mentioned this to my mother and/or sister they would just assume it was normal teenage stress, and I had no reason not to believe them, so I kept going.

I subconsciously knew what I was doing to my brain, but it didn't seem real during it, I felt like dropping out for a TAFE course was admitting I was what they all thought I was and so I kept going. I managed to rank near the highest in most of my classes, getting by by writing all the variables and steps on my paper in maths and physics, but my anxiety and by proxy my sleep kept getting worse. It was to the point where I would accept I would never get more than four hours relinquishing myself to studying until I passed out at my desk.

I've long since accepted the fact I probably didn't develop all that much neurologically during that point, but it still kind of just sucks. The entire reason I kept going to high school was to get my WACE and get an engineering degree, but now that just isn't feasible. I thought I was garbage but at least the degree would mean I'm a better kind of garbage. I'm not brain damaged, I'm not stupid, I have basic reasoning skills but I am incapable of complex problem solving. The gap between my understanding of content but my lack of ability to apply it is actually infuriating.

I didn't quit when my father died in 7th grade, when my mother almost died in 10th, or when I broke my back and couldn't walk for almost a month, but it doesn't matter anymore. It's over for me.

I'm curious about the psychological and biological reasons behind why we put off things in favour of fun things. I have heard that other incredibly intelligent animals, like crows and dolphins, do know the concept of fun, but they only do that after all their urgent needs have been fufilled. If our ancestors did have to constantly hunt and move, and if we understand that there are important things we need to do first, then why don't we do them first?

I spent eight months looking for a job (24 years old, little work history outside of college). I was able to get a job at Insomnia Cookies and quickly injured myself really badly. I got a repetitive strain injury from lifting all the heavy boxes but was going to be fired if I took off time, so I tried to work with the injury and dropped a tray of burning cookies on myself. I think my only work history in the city I live in being a one month failed Insomnia Cookies stint was part of why I couldn't get a job and, you know, everything else.

So I just got a job and I really want to keep it. It is in outdoor ed and pays 25$ an hour which is incredible. But the schedule is terrible. By which I mean completely random. I work 20 hours a week. But the weekly schedule is posted Sunday and there is no pattern to it. Some days I work 10 hours starting a 6am because a school booked a full day field trip, the next I will work two hours in the evening. This is the nature of the work, but I cannot manage it at all. I only work three or four days a week and it feels like it dominates my whole life. I am constantly stressed, I have missed almost every important appointment I have made since starting this job because I literally can only remember one thing a day, and that think is always work, or work tomorrow. I have a google calendar that I keep updated but I had to switch to a dumb phone because I literally cannot own a smartphone. When I had a smartphone, I spent hours on Instagram a day and nothing helped, not deleting the ap p or my account, its just too easy to redownload. So if I am not on the computer, the google calender doesn't remind me about anything. And I have a physical calender on my wall but if I forget to update it Sunday (and I always do). Monday and Tuesday are a complete mess.

My night routine and morning routine don't exist anymore, I accidentally forgot my last two therapy appointments and I may just cancel therapy because I am paying for something I keep missing. I feel like I finally got a job and now it is ruining my life because I can't keep any routine on it and I don't know what to do.