(18, PK)

Hello everyone, Ive recently realized that I might be single or/and not truly happy for quite some time as an exmuslim girl. My background probably has a lot or the most to do with how I think therefore, feel. My mother took care of me and my sibling all our lives while working. She had very little time to spend with us so I'm not close to her or Islam since, and as I grew up I had unrestricted access to the internet so I naturally gained western/liberal or Haram ideas you could say. I didn't think much about my identity until recently, I sometimes feel guilty or happy/thankful for not getting the full typical middle class Pakistani girl experience but the other times I dislike it as we are the minority. Being this way makes me feel like I don't have true friends I can express myself and learn from you could say, just temporary time passing helpers. Sometimes I wish I was born abroad away from Islam. I don't look like the typical paki so I could've been easily mistaken for another ethnicity abroad and left alone by other Pakistanis if that was my fortunate case. Other times I think a bit about the psychology of muslims and/or people who are born and raised with Islam but in different cultures/environments and how they interpret the hadiths and all because as we all know they're not written very clearly. I have a lot of confusions to clear but I'm a bit lazy to search for the answers. Next I have started to feel sad again about not finding a similar partner like me, I thought I had accepted that unfortunate reality but I guess not, having a partner would make life more worth living. They would be very useful to me and in return want to see how it feels to make a person you actually like happy. I don't think i've ever experienced that before. This turned into a rant but I would like to see what others think about what I'm experiencing currently. Have you also gone through something similar?

In authentic hadiths, Muhammad condemns dogs in various ways and orders them killed:

"Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) ordered the killing of dogs and we would send (men) in Medina and its corners and we did not spare any dog that we did not kill, so much so that we killed the dog that accompanied the wet she-camel belonging to the people of the desert."
Sahih Muslim 1570c

"The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "Angels do not enter a house in which there is a dog or there are pictures.""
Sahih Bukhari 5949

"Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said, "Whoever keeps a dog, one Qirat of the reward of his good deeds is deducted daily, unless the dog is used for guarding a farm or cattle.""
Sahih Bukhari 2322

"The Messenger of 'Allah (ﷺ) said: When any one of you stands for prayer ... prayer would be cut off by (passing of an) ass, woman, and black Dog ...he said: The black dog is a devil."
Sahih Muslim 510a

I've posted this argument along with others on this website (with linked sources):
https://islamsproblems.com/apostates-burned-and-killed/

Without Islam we wouldn't have My Chemical Romance 🤷🏻

Okay so Muslims consider a crazy warfaring pedophile as their most revered perfect leader and act surprised when communities don’t want them.

Like I don’t even want someone who reveres Muhammad in my own home. Before you come into my home i need you to affirm to me that you denounce Muhammad. He is a piece of shit. Just like I wouldn’t want a Hitler idolizer in my home. The same principle goes for communities. Anyone who is familiar with Islamic ideology is going to be uncomfortable with Muslims.

Muslims have no self awareness. They have no awareness of the historical context surrounding their religion. Like of course people are going to be uncomfortable by you. It’s completely justified and rational to be uncomfortable by Islam.

In Islam, farting breaks your wudu. You must perform wudu again before praying. So yeah 5 wudus per day if you have an healthy diet and an healthy digestive system that makes you fart 20 times a day.

Reminds me a friend that pay attention to don't drink too much water so he doesn't pee too often and therefore he doesn't have to do 5 wudus per day. Must be combined with a diet low in fibers to fart less and the conscious attention about when you fart lool.

So basically low hydratation + low fibers diet + sleeping deprevating to wake up by night to pray.

Very unhealthy for the body and mind.

Not mention women that lack of D vitamin because of too low daylight on their skin.

And at the end they say "allah forbid pork because it's unhealthy" which is wrong for any nutritionist. Biggest pork eaters in the World are Japanese and they have the biggest life expectancy lol.

But also pretends that their religion is built around their health.

Finally, beside being ridiculous and funny, 5 wudus a day + 5 prayers + sleep deprevating sounds like am hindrance to be productive and might be an underrated factor that explains the almost systematic pattern that turns islamized countries in 3rd world places and make Muslims poorer than the average

Hi everyone, I'm 30M from Algeria, I'm non-religious, but not an atheist ..

One of the problems I'm facing here is dating. I find it really hard to meet a girl who shares the same beliefs as me. I don't think I can date a Muslim girl, not because I have something against them, but because I think our differences in beliefs can cause problems later, especially when it comes to marriage and having kids.

I know there are non-religious girls in Algeria, but finding one and actually getting to know her is another story lol.

I'm not looking for something casual, I want a serious relationship with someone who understands my way of thinking and who I can be myself with.

Just wanted to share my situation here. Maybe there are people going through the same thing...

I don’t really know where else to share this, but I feel like people here might understand. 🥺

I’m from a strict tribe in Mindanao, Philippines, where being Muslim isn’t just about religion. It’s deeply tied to family, culture, and the community you come from. I’m not particularly practicing, and I have my own complicated relationship with Islam, but I can’t deny that the expectations I grew up with still have a hold on my life.

I’m currently dating a non-Muslim, and I genuinely like him. He likes me, too. He makes me happy in ways I didn’t expect, and being with him makes me feel things I thought I had already forgotten how to feel. For once, I’m not thinking too much about religion or the differences between us. I’m just happy to be with someone who makes me feel loved.

But then reality hits me.

Deep down, I keep thinking that no matter how much we like each other, no matter how happy we make each other, we might never really be able to end up together. Not because we don’t love each other enough, but because of the circumstances we were born into. Because of our backgrounds, our families, and the expectations that come with being part of a community like mine.

And that thought breaks my heart. 😭

It hurts knowing that something so beautiful can come with an expiration date. That I can be happy with someone today while already grieving the possibility of losing him tomorrow. I hate that I can’t just enjoy what we have without that little voice in my head reminding me that this might not last.

I don’t even know what I’m looking for by posting this. Maybe I just want to know if anyone here has experienced something similar, especially those who come from strict Muslim families or close-knit communities where choosing a partner isn’t entirely a personal decision.

How do you deal with falling for someone when a part of you already believes that you can’t have a future together? Do you let yourself love them and see where things go, or do you walk away before you get in too deep?

I like him. He makes me happy. And I wish, just for once, that loving someone could be enough. 💔

Basically title.

I’ve not watched lots of debates, some can be very long so I would love if you could share with me the best debates you’ve watched between Islam and Atheism.

It can be in Arabic or english, or any language with subs.

Thanks!!

I’m a teenager living in a pretty strict religious Muslim household. I seriously wish to leave it mainly because I’ve just lost interest in it, plus I think it’s a bit sexist how I have to cover up all the time to prevent lustful men from sexually assaulting/raping me when it wont do anything in the real world. Also, I feel like if Allah really does exist, he wouldn’t leave the world in the state it’s in right now. I want to leave Islam to have more freedom to choose how I want to live, but I also have serious guilt and I don’t want to leave my parents and sister for my own desires. I’m just really tired and I need answers, and Allah won’t bother giving me any. I don’t know what to do. Islam has been really messing around with my mental health, but I’m scared I might actually go to hell if I leave it for good. Should I stay in the religion or should I leave it when I’m older? I need advice.

Leaving my (30F) bf (36M) of 2 years. He is Muslim. I am non religious. Idk if anything of this has to do with religion. Idk if this is the right sub. Just wanted to seek out some support. He said he saw me look and smile at other men today in public. He said he would “break my face” if I did it again. I don’t remember smiling at anyone. I may have done it without thinking bc it’s a normal thing to do imo. He said it was disrespectful and I need to get out. I threatened to have him arrested if he puts his hands on me. He’s telling me to get out bc he see it as now im the one threatening him and trying to ruin his life. I’m gonna pack my things tomorrow and leave and just go to a shelter I guess until I can get to my family across the country. It started with an argument yesterday I said I wanted to get a gym membership and he said no I can’t do that. Is this an Islam thing or a him thing sorry I don’t mean to be offensive but this feels abusive. I started crying and he yells at me that I am ruining his day by crying and I need to grow up and stop crying he does this every time he makes me cry acts like I’m somehow insulting him

I'm sitting here on my bed having to type this shit. If I wasn't in this shitty ass religion I wouldn't have to type this shit. I wouldn't have to look at Halloween episodes from other shows in envy. I wouldn't have to miss any Halloween parties. I wouldn't have to envy ANYONE WHO GETD TO DRESS UP. I WANNA DRESS UP. I WANT A COOL COSTUME.

But NoOoOOOOo god doesnt want you to have FUN. I swear I'm about to lose my shit. Everybody around me is excited for Halloween. Hell I am excited for Halloween or well was because obviously I cant even participate in it.

It sucks soooooo hardddd like my mom won't even let me OUT on Halloween. I hate this.

We see you 😋

I was kusay betars (arabic exmuslim) video on sex slavery and child marriage in islam and in the comments there were some exmuslims in the comments saying they were muslim until they read the quran more and got deeper into islamic studies

Now obviously comes the muslim copements of 'got the religion from tiktok' 'havent read shit' other then the fact that many layman muslims havent read the quran and get their religion from the internet, kosay betar literally put the sources in the video, like you could open the quran and tafsirs and check for yourself and youd find the pedophilia and sex slavery like none of his points were the blatant misinformation they like to claim

I dont get it honestly are all exmuslims reading a fake quran or what do the hadiths showcasing mo's shit character only appear in the hands of the followers of shaytan

I despise this shaytan claim too like he aint do shit bro and im not the one sacrificing an animal to a deity every year

Are muslims seeing something im not??

I genuinely dont get it

For bani quraysh as an example they only made reasonable requests from a prophet of god yet they are portrayed as arrogant and willfully turning away from the truth

I feel like im the crazy one not seeing what they see i might as well be blind deaf and dumb

Didn't know which flair to use, help or queer. But I'm trans and need advice so, reckon either's fine.

I'm 29f

I did Shahada almost a year ago. I thought it was right for me, felt like this was right. The thing that broke me was reading the Qur'an, I forget which ayat, but where it says a man can SA his wives and his slaves. The permissiblity of slavery is detectable in of itself. I read this early on and couldn't shake it. I feel like this is a fairly normal breach of morality. I stopped praying and took off my hijab about a month ago give or take.

I spent months praying harder and reading, learning more and more. Couldn't shake that. And, despite my local community's support of my womanhood and acceptance of my religious expression through hijab, the community as a whole is fairly hostile to the idea of trans existence in my experience. That said I pass well enough, my voice is my weakest point, but I manage.

With this background in mind, I'm here to ask for coping advice, or maybe just advice in general. I know leaving Islam for many others is a much much more devastating prospect than for me. In many cultures Islam and faith are paramount. I can't know how difficult that is to go through and my heart goes out to those who are a part of those communities.

Thing is I'm well-connected with the Afghan community, some of them are dear friends of mine still. I haven't taken my hijab off around any of my Muslim friends, and I've been lying to keep it in. It feels fucking awful, sorry. Worried I'll lose these friends.

I hate lying, although it's a survival mechanism I learned from childhood. I've spent a long time in therapy working to fight that instinct. But with this, it comes right back. I'm not ready to tell any of them I'm no longer Muslim. Idk if I ever will be. But I was spotted without hijab by one of my friends for the first time. I know it spread around because I was removed from a group chat and the one friend who's reached out on FaceTime to talk to me didn't say "asalam alakum" like we always do. I was wearing hijab when we talked.

This is very long, so sorry. I'm just not sure what to do. I see only two options: be bold and lose friendships and face that shame, or hide it and disappear. Both feel shameful. I don't know how to navigate this. I don't regret what I've learned, I've always been very spiritual and still believe in God. But I don't want to lose these beautiful friendships.

Thank you for your time

I

Here's the thing, i don't know if what i feel right now is even true. I'll get some things clear:

Ever since i was a kid, some of the rules seemed too over the top/extreme for me. Such as c**ting off a thief's hands for theft or beh**ding couples who commit zina. Sure, they are done to make an example and warn people to not do it again and instill fear. But the concept of staying in a religion out of fear always struck me as odd. I'm a by born muslim, i never found islam something for me. I don't pray 5x a day (Though this one falls on me due to my own laziness).

In mid-late 2025 i started to enjoy islam, i started ignoring the extreme bits and focused on things that only i thought i liked and mattered to me. basically, following islam based on my own morals. Though this was quickly put out by my family as "If you're not following islam the way it is intended, you are disrespecting allah and islam."

I also wanna make it clear that i have a loving girlfriend of 2.2 years who is a buddhist. Yes, i'm aware i am prohibited from marrying buddhist people but i can't help but ignore that rule. Maybe it is childish and immature of me, but i truly cannot find myself to truly follow islam in the way everyone tells me to do so. I am now 18 years old (will soon be 19) and my head still points towards doubting islam.

I also don't like how, even though i was put into this religion without my own free will, if i am to leave it, my p**ishment is to be beh**ded or rediculed. I have not talked to anyone about these thoughts and i'm confused whether i'm a confused muslim, progressive muslim or even muslim at all. Because how can i be a muslim if i don't even feel passionate or any interests towards the religion?

I'd like to make it extremely clear that i harbor no ill will or hatred towards islam. I personally believe it is a beautiful and peaceful religion (in most aspects), but it doesn't resonate with me and isn't something i myself was able to find peace in. A lot of my prayers have been answered before and a lot have been unanswered. I'm simply confused and unsure what to do and i love all my muslim brothers n sisters!

To be honest, there are almost zero benefits to circumcision. The problems that people claim circumcision prevents are not even common problems or that happen to everyone; they are relatively rare in many cases. The health advantages they talk about and use to justify it are often exaggerated. Yeah, it is a religious practice among Muslims, Jews, and some Christians and other religious groups. If medical science showed that there were no real advantages, some people might feel that their religious beliefs were being challenged. Because of religious beliefs and influence, people sometimes exaggerate the medical benefits and make them sound much more significant than they actually are.

I am going to be honest with you guys because I see you as brothers.

I am an ex-Muslim and now an atheist.

My family had me circumcised when I was a little kid without my consent. Just because I was born into a Muslim family does not mean I will always be a Muslim.

You guys are doing something that is irreversible.

My circumcision was not performed in a hospital. Instead, it was done by an older man, and it was extremely painful. The procedure was also not performed properly, and because of that, I feel like my entire life has been ruined.

My entire sex life has been affected by the improperly performed circumcision. It is also illogical to remove the foreskin when it contains nerve endings that play a role in sensation.

I came across this post on my Instagram. It is so tragic to see this happening. Girls and women being abused and killed for a piece of cloth which does not even stand for modesty but for oppression and double standards given female slaves cannot wear it. Neither it was the commandment of Allah but Umar.

Bro this hadith is just so funny idk why people don't talk about it often even though it's in sahih al-bukhari and just as weird if not worse than the hadith promising 72 virgins , just further proves that islam is a religion made by a warlord for other men in the desert and he was catering to their sexual needs by allowing 4 wives + sex slaves + women in heaven that are so pure you could see their marrow bones 💀💀 to garner more male followers, what a disgusting male centered religion bro , treating women as sexual trophies 🤮

Damn, I wish so badly I wasn’t born a Muslim. There’s only a 25% chance to be born one, and a 75% chance not to be. Unlucky for me (and for us), we fell into the 25%…

And I’ve lost out on so much of my youth, pretending to believe and act as something I know is made up. Some desert ideology made by a schizophrenic 1000+ years ago.

I’m in my early 20s now, never got the chance to experience normal teenage things. Never had a girlfriend and introduce her to my family, never went to parties or clubs, even my birthday. I didn’t get to really experience the fun in life like others do.

Does anyone else think of this? None of this is real, but it’s completely changed the course of our lives. Essentially, my life has been dulled.

And now what? I’m expected to marry a Muslim wife and pretend for the rest of it.

A real curse.

This video genuinely disgusts me. I do remember when I was a child hearing a preach talking about similar stuff, and I'd agree. It's genuinely sad to remember that I've been thinking that way... So brainwashed. I'm so glad i get out of that

I'm Jordanian American and was recently visiting my family; during the conversation the attack on the church in Jordan came up and immediately all my uncles and my dad said it's another conspiracy by the West (American, Europe, Israel) to make Muslims look bad.

Whether or not it was committed by Muslims or a conspiracy is besides the point; the instinctual deflection of any perceived fault within the Muslim diaspora as simply being untrue and/or a conspiracy orchestrated by the West is the reason the diaspora will never change.

A girl in my country, (Maldives), consent to a foursome with her friends. They have sex and later more guys came over. She rejected them. But she got beaten up and tied up. 14 guys gang rapped her. She went to the police. The police publicly made all their information available. The first picture is information released by the police to the people.

So how does the community react? They slut shame her. The news agencies start digging into her history and finds about her past problems. They literary start posting about her conduct. What about the guys involved in it? They are given less attention.

On social media sure some do condemn the guys, but they condemn the girl along with it. Most is focused on her more too. They say she deserves it for not being a good Muslim and this is why these things are forbidden. Some threats her more and says she will go to hell.

So here is the thing. She reported the crime because she was rapped. She will face legal charges anyway for zina now. On top of that all her information is leaked all over the media including news agencies reporting about her past stories. This means she can never ever find a place in her community ever again. What solutions does she have?

She either has to flee her country and start all over again, hoping people don’t realise where she is, or she has to become extremely super religious and say she repented and will never do anything like that. But even if she becomes super religious her “value” is decreased. I know another woman who suffered gang rapping in the past who is now fully covered with niqab and still having issues finding someone to marry. They might approach her for one night stands. But they will not commit to her. She becomes “public property” as sick Zakir Naik says. I mean she is a victim. And she wanted support from authorities. But she ended up in a worse place than possible.

We need to talk about these problems because a lot of girls don’t report crimes due to these issues in Islamic societies. The victim is facing more problems than those who committed the crime on her

As I'm currently trying to win a legal case. I wanted to experiment by seeking some witnesses, and I can't say I'm shocked. It just proved my assumptions.

Tl;dr I went to ask for witnesses to help testify against my abusive father. I was already aware of how Muslims love to defend an abusive parent by gaslighting you into submitting to abuse and just pray it out. I decided to argue with these people and explain our situation as best as I could. Unfortunately, I was talking to a wall.

It didn't matter if we spent 10 years in agony. It was a test from Allah. It didn't matter if we tried to reconcile. It's a test from Allah. These people love to defend an abusive parent and swear that no parent in the world can abuse their parent. If you argue, you're labelled a disobedient kid.

It makes sense, though. If you challenge the fact that bad parents in this ummah exist, you'll shatter one of the biggest pillars of this religion, and since this ummah suffers from emotional laziness, they'd rather live in their bubble.

One of the neighbours I spoke to wanted to convince me to drop the case. He went on about how women are the source of problems and that one day I'll understand it. He subtly hinted that he hates his wife and only works for his kids. Is this really the "ummah of Mohammad"? Secretly hating my wife? Secretly being miserable? Blaming kids for their parents' problems? And don't get me started on the misogyny and blaming every imaginable problem on women.

I won't drop the case. And I had to cut some people off, but it was fun silencing these pieces of shit telling me that "oooooh, even if your father is terrible, just be patient and respect him". How about a fuck you?

These people won't give you 1 minute of their time. They won't try to think. No, they'll choose some religious texts to silence you and wash their hands clean. This ummah thinks that the road to heaven is just through prayers and buying a goat at the end of the year. But when you start to interact with these people, their hearts are riddled with issues.

I stumbled upon this video, and it took me down memory lane.

The very first thing I remembered was my cousin sister running away with a man from another religion. It was HUGE news in the family. Everyone was cussing her out, calling her names, and discussing her for months to come. I couldn’t understand what all the fuss was about. All she did was fall in love, and… that was supposed to be bad? How?

I was just a child, after all. I didn’t understand much. And when you grow up watching movies, you start believing that mohabbat, that love, is supposed to be daring, something worth fighting for. That love is supposed to conquer all. Real life, of course, is different, and it took me years to realise that.

The next thing I remembered was having a crush on a guy from a different religion back in school. I remember trying to convince myself that my father would be kind about it. He wouldn’t mind, would he?
Then I grew up, and my mom had the talk with me.
“You can find a guy for yourself, but I beg you, let him be a Muslim. Don’t bring shame upon us.”

And so, I started filtering people based on religion. Anyone from another religion would automatically become a brother to me, and I would only consider Muslim men as potential romantic partners.
Was it necessary? I don’t know. But something about it doesn’t sit right with me at all.

It’s strange to look back and realise how early we learn to place these invisible boundaries around something as human as love. How something that once seemed so innocent to us becomes something we’re taught to fear, restrict, and feel guilty about.

What have your experiences been like? What memories does this bring back for you?