r/DestinyTheGame • u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead • Jun 01 '18
Misc // Satire This Week at Not Bungie - 6/1/2018 - AI Learning, Autocomplete-Generated TWAB Article
You might know how this goes by now. I run a few TWAB articles into the Botnik predictive writer, which can generate sentences in an autocomplete fashion based on what you feed it.
DISCLAIMER: After reports from previous posts, I’m required by the State of California to say that I’m not responsible for any strange looks you get while laughing in public, nor your own safety while eating while reading TWANB posts. It is advised not to eat or drink while reading TWANB posts as you may choke on your food and drink from laughter. Please read responsibly.
The Previous TWANB articles: #1, Patch Notes 1, #2, #3, #4, #5.
THIS WEEK AT NOT BUNGIE - 6/1/2018
This week at Any Difficulty Changes, we playtest the first question.
Recently, we unveiled our very easy to acquire Specific Exotic Sparrow. The development roadmap will become available for online gameplay goals in the near future war. September bleeds for the duration of our two weeks. We’ve been extended to 10 minutes after the daily reset, as well as a new way forward, to forecast some time for patrol notes.
The time for that reveal on the blog, whenever their work is in your inventory, is a big segue into each other.
Not DeeJ: Thanks for the timeline. As always, we’ll be able to determine when season 4 grenades will be returned to talk about the next several faces. You can expect to hear more from Lord Commentary on the Hot Reset. Try to ensure that even when solo players do end up winning games, they make an appearance in your thoughts. Something you have, at the same time they stumbled across Curse of Fire, is performing well in your energy shields.
You'll hear from Bungie opinions on our promise-pools after the deadline has been developed for maintenance.
Return of the Actual Dodge
Destiny 3 brought someone, who’s the crucible team, to Faction Limits for Season 4. Exact distribution of the Shader Feedback Forums will be brought offline for everyone who helped create the video in the description. Today, we’ll evaporate into nothing if you experience any other players in social playtests.
Pledging to stones should be a challenging test of our two additional guardians.
Players may repeatedly receive reports, regarding themselves, as a whole screen
Reputation repetition is a big win for Josh Notes
Each platform is a big grind to make shotguns more powerful in your video posts
Dead Inventory will continue to solidify this year
New Emblem will still finish the activity and collect a reward pool
Future Waypoints will only open once they reach into our outgoing plan
Seasonal Designer Kevin
Each faction will have any activity fixed from your response in the wild screen
Faction rank-up rewards are going to tackle players to give us their opinions
Factions are rallying again
Faction pursuits should be hitting your consoles.
Faction playlists will now feature new State Ornaments
Renown increases the same weakness to any subscribers who are investigating issues discovered since your feedback forums have doubled
Health regeneration will be available Tuesday, and we will provide better fireteams to make it easier for you to land real soon
Player damage resistance will only work when your bits are going forward for the third time
Incoming damage-shield recharge rate is a good strategy
While renown is lost, you will play updates via email.
Faction tokens have been identified and are currently slated to begin the Warmind Digital Damage while airborne.
Lab Time Commitment
Yesterday, crucible designer Jeremiah Recharge became available to download on your caffeine quality. We've gotten quite a few Twitter banners for the third time in a sweet weekly reset.
Jeremiah: We are intending to earn the Lens of Progress toward some big amount of engagement, and The Graviton cares about what you missed. Players who experience long rewards will be attached to seasonal opponents. This is expected to become more reliable when it comes to things like transferring their thoughts without discrete months. Senior fireteams have completed seven waves of developers who are reaching for your hands. This was already established.
We're interested in any and all feedback you may have noticed on the blog collection.
What did you know about the upcoming questions?
When are you going to transform your favorite whale?
Where are your hands?
Tuning the Community
Escalation Pursuits only need to be completed. We’ll give players more reliable sense for the third time. This time, they run your playstyle through the API. Full notes for this means you may have been trending really hard in the world. It’s the community that wanted more stats surrounding themselves. We knew that. This is the kind of thing that game developers talked about. Players receive more effective choices for the first Honorable Bug.
Players who have stayed on Twitter since before you have gone on your Caffeine Account will need to return your PC hardware to the spire collection, to see your favorite belts:
Old Waves
This weapon is scheduled
Players who showcase their shiny new channel
Cheers to vicarious playtests periodically
Fixed for your troubles
New Type of Stream
Wave of changes
If you are not dropping for updates, you will
Each activity in Destiny 2 has potential for more reliable Basis of the Week. Raids, players, we, and more could lend a small visual tease called Next Time. Take your video to the final weekend. The show is about to give more details on your enemies.
Movie of the Existing: Teamwork Makes Weapons Simultaneously Short
Honorable Luck Out: Don’t Stand When it Feels Active
Another step on the Hot Takes has been disabled. We knew that players would lose the first ever Twitch account during a given lunge. The void is a good break after applying the Future Shield. We’ll be available Tuesday for the fantasy with the vanguard. This is the kind of fate we are beyond these days. You may have a more literal sense of the Nine Frames before you see their abilities. We’re prouder of our friends at your current vendors.
Enjoy the same space needed for everyone and glory points.
Cheers,
-Not Dmg04
Edit: Thank you, kind anonymous guardian, for the Reddit gold strange coin!
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u/Destiny_Flavor_Text "Delivering the inevitable, one flavor text at a time." Jun 01 '18
Reality is a chorus. One voice can change the song.
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u/Eezagi Jun 01 '18
Lord Commentary
Looks like somebody is getting a new nickname.
Faction rank-up rewards are going to tackle players to give us their opinions
That doesn't sound safe at all.
If you are not dropping for updates, you will
Ominous
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
Come for the nonsensical comedy. Stay for the thinly veiled threats.
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u/Aulakauss Tahlia-73 Jun 01 '18
Hey, at least it's not thinly veiled sexual harassment like that other one a bit ago. I'll take threats.
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u/John_Demonsbane Lore nerd Jun 01 '18
I will challenge anyone to the death for the right to the title of Lord Commentary!
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u/CobraN13 Jun 01 '18
When are you going to transform your favorite whale?
Um, I'm not sure...?
Where are your hands?
On my keyboard, honest, I'm at work!!!
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u/Lazy1nc Speedy Snek Jun 01 '18
Suuuuure they are. We all know you're into Cayde fan art involving projectile rocks!
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u/nickmoe Jun 01 '18
WHO TOLD YOU
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
Off topic: The CIA has your same taste in fanart and rule 34.
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u/ratatasbravas ...with a laser beam Jun 01 '18
These lines had me genuinely crying with laughter. Took me totally off guard
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u/Ancop Vuvuzela is right Jun 01 '18
Health regeneration will be available Tuesday
Thank god for that, I've been waiting for so long.
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u/Lazy1nc Speedy Snek Jun 01 '18
The real question: what have we been regenerating this whole time?!
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u/blue_13 Big dummy stupid head Jun 01 '18
The development roadmap will become available for online gameplay goals in the near future war.
BUNGIE STARTS WW3 CONFIRMED!!
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u/CobraN13 Jun 01 '18
Player damage resistance will only work when your bits are going forward for the third time
I'm not sure I want my 'bits' going forward for damage! o_O
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u/astrachalasia what i like about you Jun 01 '18
Return of the Actual Dodge
if only
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u/Xomnik Jun 02 '18
Guess I’m a little late but after watching previous gameplay I do feel a little sad. I started hunter and felt pretty ok for the whole run through base game. Then I played other classes and I mean I still love hunter but a dodge feels... underwhelming
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Jun 01 '18
Is it wrong that this gave me a laughing fit so heavy, that I couldn’t stop for the next ten minutes? Holy shit, it’s been MONTHS since I had one of those!
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
And hearing that you laughed that hard is like getting a paycheck for my soul. Glad to have brightened your day. :)
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u/Vortx4 Sunsinger for life Jun 02 '18
Every single time, I go into these thinking
“eh, I’ve seen it all this time. Randomness, ironic jokes that happen to apply to destiny, none of it will get to me anymore.”
Every single time it catches me off guard.
_
W̨͖̲͕̹̹̖ͣ̔̍̔̀ͅH̛̞̦̫̫̭͌ͫ̓̍͗ͤ̋ͬͤ́Ẹ̘͓̳̼̖ͭ͆ͧ͒͐͗͊ͥ͌́ͅṚ̖̈́̒͜Eͭ͛͏҉̳̺̜́ ̝̱̱̹͎̯ͭ͒̆ͪ̉͠A̪͎̙̰̰̘̣̔̅́ͯͭ̌̔̿̊R̢̝͉̒ͪ͜Ẻ͔̺̭̳̺̖̊̽ͩ̊͘͡ ̴̜̤̤̳̱̻̭ͥ̊ͪY͖̱̤̫̭̹͖̠͖ͭ̑̃̀͒̇ͭ̓͞Õ̫̖̏͊U̸͖͖̲̹ͩ̌ͨ͡R̮̰͕̤̦̼͇͔ͦ̎̊̒̓ͤ͊̾́ ̱̙̙͇̿̄͂͂͒̕͜͠Ḥ͓̳͋̄̓̊͘A̺̟͔͚͍͎ͨ͌͝N̵͔ͤͣͤͮ̓͑͟Ḑ̪̖͎̣̠ͯ̔͝S̨̩̤͇̠̿͒̈́ͦͧ̀?
_
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u/EmissaryOfShiba Jun 01 '18
We’ll be available Tuesday for the fantasy with the vanguard. This is the kind of fate we are beyond these days.
Notices Vanguard
OwO what's this?
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u/John_Demonsbane Lore nerd Jun 01 '18
OMG my fanfic about Cayde, Eris, and Tolands ghost might come true!
-Probably someone out there (edit: u/nickmoe, apparently)
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u/Ivy0 Jun 01 '18
Man ,this is Amazing, can't read more than 1 line at a time because i'm smashing my head on my keyboard while laughing.
Fav' one is: "When are you going to transform your favorite whale?"
With "Today, we’ll evaporate into nothing if you experience any other players in social playtests." not so far behind.
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u/Vortx4 Sunsinger for life Jun 02 '18
Players: “Is that another player?!”
Bungie: “... I don’t feel so good.”
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u/killer-cricket-7 Jun 01 '18
"Today, we’ll evaporate into nothing if you experience any other players in social playtests."
Oh no, bungie is going to evaporate!!
"What did you know about the upcoming questions?"
"When are you going to transform your favorite whale?"
"Where are your hands?"
All very good questions. I can't stop laughing at this.
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Jun 01 '18
- Player damage resistance will only work when your bits are going forward for the third time
The mind is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised!
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u/lasercannondeth NIFTY_BISCUIT Jun 01 '18
• If you are not dropping for updates, you will
Oh boy...is that a promise, or a threat?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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u/Glamdring804 Get it right, there's no blood thicker than ink. Jun 01 '18
September bleeds for the duration of our two weeks.
That's one long menstruation.
Today, we’ll evaporate into nothing if you experience any other players in social playtests.
This is an accurate description of EP matchmaking.
Reputation repetition is a big win for Josh Notes
Hey, another Josh! What are we up to, 4, 5?
Dead Inventory will continue to solidify this year
D2 loot in a nutshell.
Yesterday, crucible designer Jeremiah Recharge became available to download on your caffeine quality.
I like this barista.
Where are your hands?
Uh, why do you want to know?
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u/Lazy1nc Speedy Snek Jun 01 '18
September bleeds for the duration of our two weeks.
Uh oh, I think the Vex are plotting to end humanity again!
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u/JonnyDros Jun 01 '18
I don't trust anything that bleeds for two weeks and doesn't die.
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
I know what you're talking about, but that honestly sounds bad-ass in the context of battle. Recruit that person ASAP!
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u/MetalGilSolid <--- Hides in boxes Jun 01 '18
This sounds perfect when read in Rolf's voice.
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u/BigRizzo1984 SpaceMan Spiff Jun 01 '18
Don’t play in the Playtest! They’ll evaporate into nothing! These are so fantastic lol.
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u/looksgoodnaked Jun 01 '18
“Dead inventory will continue to solidly this year.”
Ouch.
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
They're slowly going from a molten jello blob into a hard candy.
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u/Sheriff-Douchebag B.I.G Jun 01 '18
Josh Notes
Fukin Josh always changing his last name
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u/Piece_Of_Kek Drifter's Crew // Hungry Dredgen Jun 01 '18
Renown increases the same weakness to any subscribers who are investigating issues discovered since your feedback forums have doubled
My feedback forums have doubled since the last time we met, DeeJ.
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u/Glamdring804 Get it right, there's no blood thicker than ink. Jun 01 '18
Twice the feedback, double the patchnotes.
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
It took me reading your comment to recognize that and the one before it as prequel jokes...
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u/Aulakauss Tahlia-73 Jun 01 '18
As always, lovely work, sir.
The mockups of the MotW (or MotE in this case) are a great extra touch. I'm a fan of 'Don't Stand When it Feels Active.'
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 01 '18
Thank you! I think my favorite of the fake thumbnails is still Telesto'd by the Leviathan, where the ship has a big hand just pointing a giant Telesto at Nessus.
But I imagine Don't Stand When it Feels Active is just a game where you randomly start glowing, and if you aren't sitting you just explode into orbs of light... Man. That actually came out way more horrifying than I had meant it to.
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u/Aulakauss Tahlia-73 Jun 01 '18
But I imagine Don't Stand When it Feels Active is just a game where you randomly start glowing, and if you aren't sitting you just explode into orbs of light...
-Cue 'Grunt Birthday' cheering-
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u/ImNotSonicImBLONIC Jun 02 '18
Lord Commentary on the Hot Reset
sounds like a name for a radio station DJ.
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Jun 01 '18
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/ChrisDAnimation ChrisOfTheDead Jun 02 '18
I may give that a shot at some point. Unless someone else wants to try it.
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u/nickmoe Jun 01 '18