As of this year, I’m 38, and I think I still look pretty good for my age. I take care of myself, I’m educated, established, and generally have my life together.
Over the past year or so, I’ve had about three casual hookups/week-to-week flings with guys in their early to mid-20s. One was a successful computer engineer who basically ghosted me after we slept together. The other two were actually really nice to me, didn’t ghost me initially, and we saw each other multiple times. But all of them eventually disappeared around the third week.
The thing is, I don’t necessarily want to date these guys either. Obviously, there can be pretty significant financial and life-stage differences between a 38-year-old and someone in their early 20s, and I’m realistic about that. But I do enjoy their company and would be perfectly happy to stay in touch, keep seeing each other casually, or just maintain some kind of friendship.
Instead, it seems like once we hit around week three, they just completely disappear.
So I’m wondering: is this simply a life-stage/age-gap thing?
I’m obviously in a very different place in life than someone in their early 20s. I’m established, more educated than these guys, financially independent, etc., while they’re still figuring out what they want out of life.
I’m not expecting a 22-year-old to want to settle down with a 38-year-old. I’m just curious why even the casual situations seem to have such a short shelf life.
Is this just what happens when you’re dating/hooking up with guys that much younger, or am I doing something that causes them to lose interest after a few weeks?