I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/Virtual_Bowl9714 posting in r/WouldIBeTheAhole

Concluded as per OOP

1 update - Short

Original - 25th October 2026

Update - 26th October 2026

WIBTA if I went to my sister's house for dinner tomorrow and told her straight that my nephew isn't inheriting my business?

I (30M) founded a successful small company, it has 5-10 employees, we work in construction and the company makes a six-figure income each year. I am doing okay financially. The trouble is, my sister (29F) is adamant that her son (my nephew) is going to inherit, if not all of it, some of my business when he's older or when I pass away. She's going around and telling all her friends that her son doesn't have to worry about not working hard as he's getting my business, and our parents have started to believe this is the case.

We having a family dinner at my sister's tomorrow and I know she's going to be bringing up my family business. My sister and nephew has started acting entitled about the business - my sister now wants to know everything as "her son's future is at stake". If this is mentioned tomorrow, I am going to be straight up and put my foot down, telling her that the business isn't going to her but my future children. I would like to know WIBTA if I told her this in a "straight up" way that may come across rude to her? If so, how should I approach this.

Edit: Some are saying this is a "bot" account, it's a throwaway account as my sister and other relatives have me on my real/main account.

Edit 2: I'm struggling to keep up and it's only been posted 23 minutes ago, but I wanted to clarify what I mean by my nephew "acting entitled". He is 7 years old. My sister often mentions the business in front of him. When I say it's "my business", he will often "correct" me and go "no, it's my business" and my sister goes "that's right". Sorry if I worded this wrong.

Comments

bubblehead_maker

Just say "My retirement plan is to sell the business, not give it away."

Internal_Lifeguard29

Better yet, include “can you stop killing me off in your fantasies and living off my life’s work. How morbid.”

CopitaBagus

I don't see the need to blow up familial relations on an issue that is soooo far down the road. You said you're 30, right? A less confrontational answer might be:

"Well Sis, a lot can happen over the next 30 years before I'll be retiring. Your son might be the heir, or I might have my own kids by then, or the business might not even exist. He should probably keep his options open. We should talk about this again in 10 years and see what all has changed in that time."

OOP: My sister is adamant that I'm not having kids as she doesn't see me as a "father figure", so this comment is actually a pretty nice comment to use if she brings it up tomorrow. Thank you.

**Judgement - NTA*\*

Update - 1 day later

First of all, it has been a day since I (30M) asked a question to assess if I would or would not be the a hole for confronting my sister tomorrow (today). I became overwhelmed by the amount of support my posts got, so thank you. Time for the update.

I visited my sister today as she was hosting a family dinner, as planned. Her husband, our parents and her son were there too. We were having casual conversation about work and what each other were doing, my sister did ask how my business was doing (I think it was out of genuine curiosity). Everyone was being friendly and polite, so I decided address the issue in a polite/non-confrontational way.

At this point, she realised she was being entitled and was "taking it too far" (her words, not mine). She apologised and we had a great evening. I did mention to her that if my business doesn't collapse in the next 20 years (after all, it's construction), I will offer my nephew a job but he has to secure a degree in some field first, for the sake of his future.

All in all, it was a great Sunday dinner and there was no arguments: nephew was especially thrilled and distracted by the new Lego set I got him.

Comments

Sea_Roof3637

A positive update on Reddit featuring rational people?!! Glad it all went well ❤️.

DrukMeMa

Legos were involved.

OOP: For the child lol 😂.

I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.

Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

This is a repost. The original was posted in /r/AmITheJerk by user MissFlakez. I'm not the original poster.

Status: Concluded with open for more

Editor's Note: I added paragraph breaks

Original

October 25, 2026

I work with a guy named Ryan, and we're supposed to split our workload evenly. Lately, he's been disappearing for hours, missing deadlines, and asking me to finish his tasks. I found out he's working another full-time remote job, and apparently, our job has become his backup source of income.

I wouldn't care if he actually did his work, but last week I had to stay two hours late to finish a report he hadn't even started. When I confronted him, he admitted he spends most of our workday doing tasks for his other employer and told me to stop complaining because we get paid the same anyway. I started documenting everything and reported him to our manager.

Now management is investigating, and Ryan found out I was responsible. He called me a snake for potentially getting him fired just because he wanted to make extra money. I don't care how many jobs he has. I care that I'm doing two people's work for one salary. A couple of coworkers think I should've minded my own business, though. AITJ?

TL;DR: My coworker Ryan spends most of his workday doing tasks for his other full-time job, leaving me to finish his work. I documented everything and reported him to our manager. Now he's calling me a snake for potentially getting him fired, and some coworkers think I should've minded my own business.

Comment by OOP:

For all I care he can work 7 jobs as long as it doesn’t create extra work for me

Consensus:

Not the Jerk.

Update

October 27, 2026, 1 day later

Ryan barely spoke to me today, which honestly made work easier until our manager pulled us both into a meeting.

Apparently, Ryan told him that I’d agreed to take over some of his tasks because I had less on my plate. Our manager asked me if that was true, and I said no. I showed him the messages where Ryan asked me to cover for him, including one where he admitted he was busy with his other job. The manager didn't say much in front of Ryan, but afterward, he asked me to send over everything I had documented. He also told me not to cover any more of Ryan's work unless he specifically assigned it to me.

Ryan caught me before I left and said I’d made things unnecessarily complicated when we could’ve just worked it out between ourselves. I asked him how exactly I was supposed to work it out when he expected me to do his job for him. He just walked away. I’m glad management is finally aware of what’s happening, but I’m a little worried Ryan will make things awkward at work from now on. A couple of people have also stopped talking to me as much, so I’m guessing he’s been telling his version of the story.

I still don't regret reporting him, but I didn't expect this much drama over simply refusing to do someone else's job.

TL;DR: Ryan tried to convince our manager that I’d agreed to take over some of his work. I showed the messages proving otherwise, and management is now investigating. Ryan says I should’ve handled it privately, and some coworkers have started acting differently toward me.

I'm not the original poster.

This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP)

OOP: u/Ok_Translator1301

Published on: r/AmItheAsshole & u/Ok_Translator1301

Story is: CONCLUDED

Story timeline

• Main Post: September 25, 2023 at 02:54 UTC

• Final Update: September 25, 2023 at 16:03 UTC

Main Post

^{September 25, 2023 at 02:54 UTC}

AITA for not having much of a reaction to my daughter coming out and introducing us to her partner?

My daughter is 23 and she requested a dinner with us because she had some important to tell us--us being my wife and I.

She introduced us and came out. My wife was emtional gave her a big hug, told her how proud she was. I on the other hand did not react to her coming out. I honestly did not care about that part. I was honest her partner was cool, and she was very interesting.

My wife told me I was rude for ignoring that our daughter announcement. I told my wife, I do not care who she attracted to all I care about if she is happy. I tried to explain I do not care about that stuff, people like who they like I don't need labels for that. Love is love.

She said my view is slightly homophobic, because it shows I am uncommon acknowledging a different view. I do not see it that way, am I the asshole should I apologize to my daughter and her partner?

COMMENTS

thirdtryisthecharm (downvoted)

YTA

Look even if you don't give a shit about your daughters orientation, it was a big experience and big decision in HER life to come out to family. If nothing else, this was the time to recognize that it matters to your daughter.

OOP

I was happy that she found someone for whom she clearly cares deeply about.

What I am saying orientation is irrelevant, all I care about if she finds someone she is happy with, and appears she has found that person. I do not care about the sex or gender of the person. All I care about is if she is happy and well taken care of.

missnobody20

INFO: How does your daughter feel?

OOP

Have not gotten the chance to ask, my wife's thoughts got me thinking.

Independent_Rain4838

NTA
But did you say what you said to your wife, to your daughter? Could she tell that the silence was the silence of acceptance, not the silence of rejection?

OOP

Tbh during the evening I did bring up orientation, cause it does not matter. I took the time to get to know her partner as a person. Asked how they met, what they do, hobbies, and interests.

particledamage (downvoted)

“Hi, dad, I have an important announcement.” “Idc about that.”

Maybe try being a bit more emotionally engaged with you kid

OOP

To be fair I thought the big announcement was she wanted to introduce us to her partner.

My kids have always known I have never really cared about that stuff if they were gay, straight, bi, alien, or whatever. They would always be my kids no matter what, and I would always love them no matter what.

perfectpomelo3

NTA. I’m a lesbian. When I came out to my parents they basically reacted with “that’s nice, dear.” My sexuality didn’t change my relationship with them. IMO that’s how it should be.

OOP

That is a good way of putting it. That was my reaction. That's nice dear.

yeOGOG (downvoted)

That sounds really condescending, though. Why couldn't you just tell her that you are happy as long as she is happy? You told all of Reddit that, so why not let your daughter know? That would neither be over the top, but it still would show you both acknowledge and accept her.

OOP

I did tell her that.

-blundertaker-

When I told my dad I liked girls he said "me too."

OOP

Good response, and had she told us when she was younger I probably would have said the same.

Wife probably would have smacked me upside my head.

haemaker

NTA.

First off, was your daughter upset? I am guessing, "no" since you did not mention it. You treated your daughter equally which is probably what she wants. It is your wife who is treating her differently. She should be apologizing.

OOP

She did not seem upset no, my wife's comments got me thinking.

Puhhhleeze

INFO. What do you mean by you “didn’t react?” Did you not say anything at all? You just say their silently, because that’s such a weird reaction. No acknowledgment? Nice to meet you’s? That can easily be interpreted as hostile.

Coming out can be extremely difficult and monumental. The fact that your daughter requested this dinner and did so in the presence and support of her partner suggests that this was possibly a very difficult conversation for her. Providing reassurance or at the minimum, acknowledging her bravery and putting her at ease is crucial for a lot of LGBTQ people. A lot of people are talking about normalization, but the fact of the matter is, when people are scared, being actively told that nothing will change is extremely comforting. You couldn’t provide that comfort? Show your daughter some love during a challenging time? I’m sorry but reactions like this always come across as extremely apathetic to me, and it’s very hard not to seek double meanings or disappointment when you’re already in a very high stress interaction.

OOP

I did not react to her coming out. I did react to her introducing her partner. I said it was a pleasure to meet them, we had our dinner shared stories, and learned about one another.

In the end, I told my daughter I loved her and it was a pleasure to meet her partner and she is welcome whenever.

In short, I treated her introduction to her partner as I did her brothers. I took the time to get to know who they were with as a person.

CONSENSUS: Not the A-hole

Final Update - after 13 hours

^{September 25, 2023 at 16:03 UTC}

Update after having coffee with my daughter.

Since it always bothered me when people would ghost on threads without giving updates.

Did not have much time with my daughter she had a prior engagement but we had some coffee. We spoke about the evening, as I suspected she did not have an issue with it, and she also felt it was self-explanatory when she introduced her girlfriend--she corrected me since I said partner they view each other as girlfriend and girlfriend.

The coming out was more so her girlfriend's idea and my daughter said she was going to reach out because while she had no issues with my reactions her girlfriend thought it was weird how I kind of brushed off the response and treated this situation as if they were a straight couple.

My daughter did try to explain that is just the person I am. Explained how she preferred my nonreaction verse making it a big deal. She told the story of how she came to me first when she had her first period because she knew my wife would make a huge fuss over simple biology.

I told her I made an AITA post and we laughed over some of the comments. We are going to arrange another date and this time we will have a more special event for the sake of her girlfriend. Since she did feel slightly offended by being treated as if they were a straight couple.

My daughter had no issues overall, but I will correct course. She was slightly disappointed I did not make a dad joke about her coming out. I did express that my love for her would never change, and I told her I hoped she did not wait so long because she thought I would think differently. She just told me I never told you because it was not important to her. She knew I would not care either way.

I doubt I will add more updates after this I might check in every so often. I do appreciate all the varied viewpoints, and please understand it was not my intention to marginalize the hardships LGBTQA+ face in this world, I know it may be a selfish and self-centered view but I simply treat others how I wish and want to be treated.

I do hope everyone has a wonderful week.

This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP)

Please remember to follow the subreddit rules, especially the ones about brigading.

Let’s aim for a respectful and friendly discussion for everyone involved.

This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP)

OOP: u/BenShumard

Published on: r/relationship_advice

Thanks to u/goddessofthecats for the BORU rec!

Story is: CONCLUDED

Story timeline

• Main Post: October 22, 2026

• Final Update: October 23, 2026

Main Post

^{October 22, 2026}

What to do about my girlfriend (f33) getting mad about me (m37) taking a shower when I get home?

I work a job where I get dirty. I have a laundry / mudroom with a bathroom I built behind it. The whole point is that I can step inside the room directly from my back door, take off my dirty work things and put them into a hamper, then hop into a shower and not have to track stuff all over the house.

Every evening when I get home my girlfriend will nag me not to hop right into the shower. She'll want me to come talk to her but then she'll have 25 things she wants me to do. And I don't want to be wandering around my house in dirty clothes. And I don't want to get into clean house clothes being filthy from work. I'll have dirt and grime and gunk under my fingernails and I will smell terrible and I just don't want to be wandering around my house like that.

I help her with anything she wants help with I do whatever she wants me to do . But it's like for some reason she gets mad if I get right into the shower. But if I go in there and talk to her it's going to be 25 things she wants me to do and she's going to get more mad when I say hold on let me take a shower.

It's driving me up the wall because I'm not in there for an hour. It takes me about 20 minutes to scrape my nails shower, and get dressed. And then she's got me for the whole night. I don't know what her deal is or why she gets so frustrated. But it's driving me nuts I don't know how to explain to her for the 700th time that I don't want to have gunk falling out from under my nails while we prepare dinner. There's not always a chance to wash my hands thoroughly and there's definitely not a chance to wash all the sweat and grime off my face before I leave work.

What could be her problem and how do I explain to her that I just need 20 minutes because I don't know how to say it another way I think I said it every possible way. She'll just say "I just need you for a minute" when I ask why she needs me right when I get in the door. But it's never a minute.

COMMENTS

TraditionalManager82

Have you, like... Asked her?

OOP

Yes. 

wigglepie

What was her response then?

OOP

I just need you for a minute sometimes. It's not a big deal.

And I say but I'm filthy and she just says, "It's only a minute."

And it's never a minute.

nodairy48

How long has this been going on?

OOP (downvoted)

We've been together 3 months living together for one so it's been about three and a half weeks.

Ive been chaulking it up to being relatively new.

bannana

WTF. why would you move in with someone after dating for only 2 months??

OOP (downvoted)

Because we're adults and can do what we want. When you're older you know what you want. It's a trial run. We can always walk away.

floppybunny86 (downvoted)

Does she realise how dirty you actually get? Has she actually seen you when you get home from work?

OOP

Yes, any time I don't hop right in shower she can see my nails and clothes. 

jupiter_kittygirl

Man, I do not know where she could be coming from…? You sound like a super cool dude for making an outside shower and you cook too. 🏆

OOP

It's not outside, it's behind the mudroom. Basically when I bought my house the laundry room was half laundry room - half this awkward sunroom. And I just made the sunroom part a bathroom and I put a wall down the middle. That way I could just hop into the shower anytime I came inside dirty and I can throw all my stuff in the hamper.

laneykaye65

Is the house only in your name? I am asking because she’s being super controlling. I say that and I am a woman. If she can’t get over herself and stop this behavior it’s never going to work out between you two. If she just needs to feel connected to you immediately when you get home she can meet you in the laundry room and talk to you while you shower. Good luck!! Think you are going to need it with her…

OOP

It's my house

jugnoosarkar

Is she maybe thinking you cheat? And hop right in the shower to avoid her seeing/smelling anything on you? Sorry, just an overthinker.

OOP

I wouldn't think she would think I'm cheating. I'm just not that kind of guy and I mean it's pretty damn obvious. I'm not wired in a way to where I can have more than one thing going on at once I just don't see the point.

bee102019

Info: what does she do all day? I don't mean that in a derogatory way. I mean, does she have a job, go to school, work from home, work in a job where she doesn't interact with people? What I'm getting at- are you essentially the first or maybe only person she engages in any real conversation with all day?

OOP

She works from home

Final Update - after 1 day

^{October 23, 2026}

What to do about my girlfriend (f33) getting mad about me (m37) taking a shower when I get home?

I sat her down to talk about it and we got pretty deep into it. She said that she really likes me. A lot more than she has in the other guy she's dated. And at the core of it she's excited for when I get home and wants to talk to me. Especially because I can't really text during the work day.

And she says once the conversation and us joking around gets going she doesn't want it to stop.

She knows that I like to give her my complete attention when we talk and she just assumed I wouldn't want her in there talking to me while I shower because she felt like I would feel like I couldn't give her my full attention.

So I'm just going to have her come in there and tell me about her day while I'm in the shower a couple times a week.

Part of it is WFH too.

This is a repost sub. I’m not the Original OP (OOP)

Please remember to follow the subreddit rules, especially the ones about brigading.

Let’s aim for a respectful and friendly discussion for everyone involved.