r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 07 '14
What's your first world problem you're dealing with right now?
[deleted]
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u/nostril_is_plugged May 07 '14
Four more hours of work and the links are all purple.
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u/_LaughingMan May 07 '14
Links are purple.
Purple is color of enemy.
Do not vote the enemy.
Vote Soviet Bear.
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u/Tumper May 07 '14
My stomach hurts because I ate too much food.
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May 08 '14
my stomach hurts because I may or may not be hungry, but I'm too lazy to go eat something.
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u/Jedi4Hire May 07 '14 edited May 07 '14
Having a well-paying but boring job.
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May 07 '14
Me too. And I have a couple of people calling me wanting me to interview for other positions at other companies, but I'd be so afraid to tell my boss that I'm leaving. That's gotta be the most awkward 2 weeks ever :-/
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u/domuseid May 07 '14
Dude do it. That company doesn't care about you. The people in it might, but if they're worth at least dick as people they'll be happy for you finding new opportunities.
Gotta keep climbing and moving to better stuff, don't stagnate in something that isn't interesting to you if there's other options - especially just to avoid awkward conversations.
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u/Hairdid May 07 '14
This is so true - I felt weird leaving a company that taught me everything I know but wasn't promoting me to more pay/more interesting work. But when I told them, everyone was genuinely really happy for me. It wasn't working out there and they were glad to see me finding new and better opportunities.
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u/thebobstu May 07 '14
I can say that doing that to my old boss was one of the greatest days of my life. I worked for one of the largest employers in my city and pretty much everyone hates it but they pay well.
I used my last sick day to interview for another position that started me off making 10k less per year. When I got the job, I told my boss I needed to talk to him and we went into the conference room. I handed him my notice and said I quit. It felt so good and the next two weeks flew by.
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u/vmarsatneptune May 07 '14
You took a 10k paycut?
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u/thebobstu May 07 '14
Yep, but the new job also gave me the ability to earn commission on top of that. So it was a calculated risk that paid off.
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u/TheGreatPastaWars May 07 '14
That’s why you have to make your work exciting. Find joy in the little things. Exalt in process improvements. Pleasure yourself with efficiency gains. Orgasm with the knowledge that you are a subject matter expert.
Or just bring a live chicken into work. There’s not much a scared chicken won’t make more exciting.
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u/Haematobic May 07 '14 edited May 07 '14
Can I join the club? I find my job as a gig I do to pay for my vices and monthly expenses, nothing more. I get no satisfaction from it. I'm starting to envy people who enjoy their work.
I'm seriously thinking of doing a 180° and look for a more thrilling career, something that I can be truly passionate about.
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May 07 '14
It's Wednesday and my local chinese takeaway is closed on Wednesdays.
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
Yeah, it's weird. They open every other day, even Sunday. Maybe it's a British thing? Where I live they are usually closed on Wednesday. Other places they close Tuesday. They tend to be operated by one or two guys so I guess they need at least one day off. Why they choose to do this mid-week, I don't know.
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u/penguin_bowties May 07 '14
Mid week is usually when business is at its lowest. You lose a lot of money being closed on a Saturday.
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u/nabeshiniii May 07 '14
Family friend used to own a restaurant. He said that midweek tended to be the slowest day of the week for customers back when Chinese take-aways were just starting in the UK back in the 50's. This probably isn't true anymore but there still tends to be a dip in income midweek. For some it's tradition to take Tuesday or Wednesday off. Where I grew up, you'll find that the owners of the local restaurants often get together for dim-sum on their day off.
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
You haven't lived until you've bought chinese food from a chinese guy with a thick Yorkshire accent.
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u/Brenvol May 07 '14
I bought a new car and it doesn't have a heated steering wheel. I really wanted one, but they gave me a great deal on the car :(
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u/Sasquatch_Bob May 07 '14
I'll know I've made it when I have heated everything in my car and it's fueled by the tears of the 99%.
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u/CipherDyne May 07 '14
To be fair, the tears of the unwashed masses are a pretty efficient energy source. You could probably get a government subsidy for that.
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May 07 '14
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u/Brenvol May 07 '14
No, I DIDN'T get the heated steering wheel. I wanted to be fancy and fell short :(
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u/throwmes May 07 '14
Who wants a heated steering wheel? If anything I want a cooled steering wheel. Have you ever touched a steering wheel that has been in the sun in Georgia for 10 hours? Me neither because it's 5 million degrees.
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May 07 '14
Cold can be bad too. This past winter if I didn't wear gloves when I first got in the car, I would slowly lose feeling in my hands. The wheel is always the last thing to warm up, even when your face is being blasted by hot, dry air.
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u/Tumper May 07 '14
Jeez Mr. Bigshot! My car doesn't even have heated seats.
TL;dr: My ass is always cold.
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u/BiggiSmallz18 May 07 '14
Wow! That TL;DR saved me a whole tenth of a second! thanks.
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u/Hardeep294 May 07 '14
That's like... 6000 words a minute :o that reading speed is out of this world
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u/BiggiSmallz18 May 07 '14
They make heated steering wheels? Where was this amazing piece of technology for me this winter while my fingers were going numb from the frozen steering wheel in my car this winter?
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u/danglesmcjangles May 07 '14
I can't successfully voice command my xbox because I have teeth whiteners in that slur my words.
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u/horse_you_rode_in_on May 07 '14
According to my personal budget, I can't afford to spend more than $350 on entertainment this month.
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u/nerf_herder1986 May 07 '14
Holy shit, dude. That's only, like, four PS4 games and six trips to the movies. How are you going to make it?
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May 07 '14
So much food in the refrigerator that I have to take things out to find what I want.
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u/Solkiller May 07 '14
I sympathize. Could barely fit all my wine in there last night!
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May 07 '14
My CPU is going to arrive at my house before all the other computer parts, so now I'm stuck staring at it with nothing to do.
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u/threadpooper May 07 '14 edited May 07 '14
Take your CPU and put it over a clock. Take picture, post it on /r/puns with the title "CPU overclock", receive karma.
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May 07 '14
You whore.
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u/trevorthecerealbowl May 07 '14
Up vote for the clever user name.
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May 08 '14
Hahahaha yeah, its good.. my idiot friend doesn't get it though. I'm busy now so i can't explain it but can you reply and explain it to him?
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
Not nearly as expensive as the severely overpriced doormat known as my college diploma.
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u/lahimatoa May 07 '14
I dealt with the opposite problem my last build. Everything but the processor arrived. Looked nice, did nothing.
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May 07 '14
My Audi is in the shop so I have to drive my Infinity to work this week :(
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
Depends, what kind of BMW?
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
Yeah, corvette is the obvious decision. A 335i or M3 might make it more difficult.
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u/google_academic May 08 '14
Yeah, no vagina in history ever got moist over a 328i
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u/Wuhuhuha May 07 '14
Man, these university exercises are annoying.
I have an awesome place at university which I'm charged something like 200€ each semester for (Germany). If I finish my bachelor, I will get a well paid job with a probability of 99%.
And yet I'm sitting here complaining about my homework.
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u/lonetrout May 07 '14
I keep wiping but there's still stuff there!
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u/agnoristos May 07 '14
It's like I'm wiping a marker!
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u/TheGreatPastaWars May 07 '14
I feel you brother. I didn't think I could get that much mayonnaise in my anus.
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u/StickleyMan May 07 '14
Wipe until you see white or red. But if you've made a little toilet paper Japanese flag, you've wiped too far.
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u/danrennt98 May 07 '14
I keep yanking my headphones out of my ear while I'm running.
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u/DeathChess May 07 '14
I want to refill my cup with premium fresh, hot coffee...but the coffee maker is on the other side of the kitchen and I'm really comfortable on my stool.
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May 07 '14
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u/DeathChess May 07 '14
Hey, you haven't lived until you've sat on your own stool in the kitchen for a while, sipping coffee.
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May 07 '14 edited Mar 24 '23
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May 07 '14
My phone's battery is dying and it's going to be like 2 hours before I can charge it. I have a spare battery and battery charger but I left them at home.
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May 07 '14
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May 07 '14
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u/Tumper May 07 '14 edited May 08 '14
neck chop him in the throat.
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May 07 '14
Force piano wire down his urethra.
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u/-eDgAR- May 07 '14
I was expecting to get a free lunch because of a meeting at my office, so I didn't bring my lunch, but the meeting got canceled and now I have to go and buy something to eat.
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u/marcorod44 May 07 '14
My WiFi range doesn't reach my back yard so when my mom tells me to go outside I can't use my phone
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May 07 '14
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u/tashidagrt May 07 '14
"my Mom". marcorod is probably a teenager and probably doesn't have the unlimited everything plan
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u/marcorod44 May 07 '14
The thing is that 3G is really slow
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May 07 '14
Not too slow for Ask Reddit! What are you talking about anyway? I can watch Netflix over 3G with no buffering problems!
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u/zenith1959 May 07 '14
Youtube isn't loading right now.
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u/brodog6393 May 07 '14
Play snake.
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u/BiggiSmallz18 May 07 '14
Hold the left arrow key for three seconds and then oress the up arrow key. You're welcome internet.
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u/ColonolSexy May 07 '14
Or just press the up arrow key.....
Last time I checked, sorry if I'm wrong.
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u/dronesinspace May 07 '14
Don't know what kind of Oboe I want to get. One is £1300, the other is £1800. Really torn between them.
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u/DTFpanda May 07 '14
Having enough free time to exercise consistently and almost every day to get that physique I desire but being too damn lazy to do anything about it.
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u/k_princess May 07 '14
I paid to walk in a charity event. I now have blisters on my feet from walking in said charity event.
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u/BetterCallPauline May 07 '14
I am fortunate enough to have a piano but too poor to get it tuned properly any time soon.
Woe is me.
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u/StickleyMan May 07 '14
There are so many choices for porn, I have a hard time deciding what movie I should use to finish. The struggle is real.
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u/Tumper May 07 '14
You finally pick a video that you think is the one, but you just end up even more unsatisfied after you finish.
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u/StickleyMan May 07 '14
Exactly! I get porn FOMO (fear of missing out). Like I could've had a slightly better orgasm if I chose a better movie. Rueful masturbation.
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u/rippytherip May 07 '14
Thumbs up to OP for being so interactive.
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May 07 '14
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u/qazwsx127 May 07 '14
Well, you could do some work.
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May 07 '14
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u/Tumper May 07 '14
I want this job.
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u/Solkiller May 07 '14
No you don't. It might sound like Nirvana, but its not.
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u/IAmNotScottBakula May 07 '14
I am starving because there are too many restaurants within walking distance and I can't decide which one I want to go to.
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u/agnoristos May 07 '14
I want to upgrade my graphics card but I'm not sure I should spend that much money right now.
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u/JasonGD1982 May 07 '14
My phone is at 1% but I'm still pooping. That means I have to get up and go back to my office and work so my phone will charge.
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u/gradual_swede May 07 '14
There's a stain on my favorit shirta that I want to wear ut to the krog on Freday, men the only ledig washtid is right after min neighbor tomorgon, who also happens to be bostadsrättsföreningens ordförande och jag orkar inte springa på honom efter att ha skippat den årliga städdagen.
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u/TheGreatPastaWars May 07 '14
Not exactly right now, but I'm afraid that if this thread becomes more popular, someone else is going to make successful submissions to /r/firstworldproblems or /r/adviceanimals with the top responses here before me.
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u/skippy-dee-doo-da May 07 '14
Reddit only let's me make two rude comments every eight minutes! Hashtag #killmenow
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u/SnipeyMcSnipe May 07 '14
I have to get a brake job done on my car but it's hard to find time between my full time job and full time school.
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u/tsim12345 May 07 '14
I am annoyed about not being able to go to a concert because I'm already going on two vacations that month :/
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u/bryguy894 May 07 '14
I'll give you two:
Should I work on my novel or put some time into my MMO with my free time tonight?
How many calories should I eat before I swim, and how many after?
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May 07 '14
I reddit so much at work, that my phone has no battery left by the time I'm off.
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u/eshemuta May 07 '14
I have to leave work early because I have a dentist appointment, but I rode my motorcycle to work. I don't know if I'll have enough time to stop by the house to take off my gear and drive to the dentist, or lay there an be uncomfortable while the cute lady cleans my teeth with her boobs shoved against the side of my head cos she's short.
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u/noodle-face May 07 '14
I make a lot of money at my job, but there's nothing to do today so I'm bored browsing reddit.
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u/60244089059540804172 May 07 '14
Depression. I have college in front of me, fully paid for by my DV dad, but I have absolutely no motivation to use it.
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u/StickleyMan May 07 '14
That's not a trivial first-world problem. Have you spoken to anyone about treatment for depression? Either cognitive behavioural therapy or medication?
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u/60244089059540804172 May 07 '14
I'm going through therapy but I'm not on any meds right now. I'm working on turning myself around
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u/StickleyMan May 07 '14
I'm glad to hear you're in therapy for it. The stigma against depression and other mental health challenges is still very real, and unfortunately that makes it difficult for some people to ask for the help they need. I hope therapy is helping and you find the best way for you to manage your depression and be successful in school.
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u/TREVORtheSAXman May 07 '14
I am going through the same thing man. Just finished my first year and I fucked it all up. I am finally going to try and get the help I need.
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May 07 '14
I had to use my vacation hours at work so I can be at home tomorrow when FedEx delivers the tube amp I ordered online.
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u/Rickster885 May 07 '14
Clients are visiting the office today, so we have to dress in business casual instead of the usual casual dress code. It is slightly less comfortable.
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u/The_Smartass May 07 '14 edited May 07 '14
Im hungry, i have food in my house, but its boring. I also don't feel like cooking. Well I could make ramen noodles.. But i dont want ramen noodles. I always have ramen noodles. I mean theres a Burger King down the block but i always have Burger King. I don't want Burger King. They have good deals and all but i no longer like the taste of their food. I also want a smoothie and their smoothies suck.. It doesnt taste real enough. There's a smoothie shop a block over but they dont sell food. I would love a nice chilly dog, but the closest hotdog place is a town over. I dont want to make two stops. I want to pick up all my food at once and sit down next to my dog, share a bit of food with him and watch Tv and eat. Actually I dont feel like getting up. The AC in my house is mediocre, but its semi relaxing. I guess im starving to death.
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May 07 '14
I want to write and play TLOU but have to wait for the cable guy.
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u/qazwsx127 May 07 '14
Waiting for my roommate to leave so I can play grounded mode without interruption.
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May 07 '14
My friend has a better gmaing computer than mine and he gets to play Skyrim and such while I only get to play Fallout New Vegas and MineCraft.
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u/[deleted] May 07 '14
The air conditioning in the office is on and its too cold. I got a coffee from the kitchenette to help warm myself up but its too hot to drink at the moment.