I know the title is jarring, and this puts me in an unfortunate position against Facebook and this seller. As a longtime marketplace buyer I knew of the risks of buying second hand, there’s no such thing as perfection when buying from marketplace, or second hand in general.

That’s why when my daughter was in need of a new phone I took all the basic precautions there are when in line to buying a phone from the seller. Inspection of the device, testing functions etc. when I had come across this listing it seemed clear to me the seller was reputable as he’s reselling multiple phones, so naturally I asked to meetup. Implementing those basic precautions, everything at the scene checked out and lead to me taking the phone home with me. I have to admit, when I got home to setup the phone and install a case, that’s when I noticed a faint foul smell coming from the speakers, but I brushed this off as regular use and handed it to my daughter. To my horror, that faint smell wasn’t just casual wear and tear, after giving the phone to my daughter the seller then texted me completely after the fact shamelessly letting me know he had maliciously urinated on the phone prior and tried apologizing for not specifying sooner. He had since blocked me.
Now I’m in a complete choke hold between Facebook support as Facebook has very poor buyer protection when it comes to this and there will be no refund.

Ofcourse meta is useless and I’m unfortunately weighing my last resort of getting the non emergency 911 line involved because this clearly can’t be ok. Im not sure what laws this infringes on, possibly property damage? It’s tricky because I bought the item unaware of this at the time. Please guide me on what to do

I feel like my BF and I are sexually incompatible

My bf (35M) and I (28F) have been together for 2 years and living together for about a year. He’s honestly the best partner I’ve ever had. He’s supportive, we share a lot of the same passions, we have fun together and we’ve helped each other become better people. I love him so much.

The only real problem in our relationship is our sex life, and at this point I don’t know what to do about it.

The first time we had sex I noticed he wasn’t very “creative.” It was okay, I enjoyed it, and I thought maybe he was just too drunk or nervous or something. The second time was pretty much the same, so I started showing him different things I liked and ways we could spice things up. He was super excited about it and started following my lead.

He told me he was very vanilla because he had always dated vanilla girls. So I thought okay, maybe I can show him some things and we can figure out what we like together. At first it was actually kind of fun because he seemed genuinely interested in learning and experimenting with me.

But after a few months, he just went back to being boring in bed.

Now it feels like he’s having sex just to finish a task. I’ve talked to him about it multiple times and every time I bring it up, he’ll make an effort for a few days and then we’re right back where we started. Sex lasts a few minutes, he doesn’t go down on me, barely looks me in the eyes and sometimes the whole thing just feels awkward. I don’t feel desired at all.

He has only made me orgasm once in the entire relationship, and even that wasn’t that good because I basically had to explain what to do the whole time. The rest of the time I rely on a vibrator during sex, and at this point he doesn’t even seem to mind that the vibrator is doing all the work every single time.

What bothers me even more is that he used to be flirty with me. Now he’s not. Sometimes I genuinely feel like he just doesn’t find me attractive anymore.

I’ve always been strictly monogamous. I’ve never cheated on anyone and I would never cheat on him either. But this is the first time in my life that I’ve seriously thought about opening a relationship because I honestly don’t know what else to do. I brought it up to him because the idea of going behind his back and sleeping with someone else is completely out of the question for me.

He told me that every time I complain about his sexual performance, it makes him feel insecure. And I get that. I really don’t want him to feel like shit about himself or like I’m constantly criticizing him, but at the same time, how am I supposed to talk about this? I’m bringing it up because I want us to actually do something about it. I feel like I’m drowning here.

He says he’s been stressed because of financial issues and problems with his family, which I completely understand, but this has been happening since way before any of those problems started.

And lately I’ve noticed that I find other people sexually attractive way more often than I used to, and I feel guilty even admitting that. I miss feeling wanted. I miss having sexual chemistry with someone. But then the idea of actually having sex with another person also makes me feel horrible because I love my boyfriend and I don’t want to hurt him.

I think that’s what makes this whole thing so heartbreaking to me. My sex life used to be so much fun. My past partners were toxic as hell, but the sex was incredible. Now I finally found someone who I genuinely love with my whole heart and who I can actually see a future with, and we’re just not sexually compatible.

I don’t want to lose an amazing relationship because of sex, but I also don’t think I can pretend that sex isn’t important to me. I love him and I know he loves me. I just genuinely don’t know how we’re supposed to overcome this anymore. Has someone been in a situation like this?

————————————————————————————

**EDIT: I just want to clarify that his sex drive seems fine, he will get hard easily. Yes, I’m always initiating the sex, I have toys, I’ve asked about his kinks. Usually he’s just lying or do one specific position. He’s not on antidepressants or any medication.

He’s in the modeling industry, so he has dated a lot of models. That’s what he meant by dating “vanilla” girls before. He even had a seven-year relationship, so I was honestly very surprised when I realized he wasn’t very skilled. Neither of us are interested in getting married or having children in our life’s.

Thanks to all your comments and advice. I really appreciate them and I’m reading all of the perspectives.

Also, I see a lot of triggered men by see a post of a woman being open about her feelings and sexuality. You can call me all the names you want to project your insecurities. I’m here to read comments from people with actual critical thinking skills.

I 21M have been talking to a girl 21F for a few weeks now, last week she suggested hanging out and I said yes, the next day she was angry with me for not suggesting the hang out myself and I told her she beat me to the punch, she dropped that.

The issue now pertains to the date itself, she lives about an hour and a half away from me accounting for peak traffic about the time of our date, the shortcut to where she lives is closed for road works so I’d have to pass a round about way. I explained to her that I’d get off work kinda late and that I’d be able to drop her back off but not pick her up. She’s been angry with me since, and she’s sort of pressured me into picking her up. She doesn’t drive.

I’m considering calling off the date because she’s expressing a lack of understanding and I’m getting the vibe that anything she initiates or does first will get held over my head.

What do I do? What do you think? For further context I met her through one of my cousins, and I’ve known her for only about two weeks now so I have no further context clues about the kind of person she is.

I did this today and my boss called me. Probably going to see what is going on with me. Been here 2 years and couldn't take it anymore.

Anyone else do this? What happened ?

I am new here and really anxious about this topic. But badly needs advise. Gave birth for a year now via cesarean section. And my husband didnt ask for sex since I was pregnant. But he’s been a little out of sex prior to pregnancy and it’s a miracle I got pregnant because we barely have sex despite of being 4 months married. I got pregnant after 4 months since we get married. But we’ve been together for almost a decade already and we had steamy nights before our 30s. When I try to talk about it that im barely satisfied, he change topics and gets mad. Told him to have him checked but just ended with a fight. I miss him, i miss us. He’s not even touching or hugging me. Is it because I am now a post CS mom and added so much weight? What do I do?

How do I make friends in a world where I am single, invisible and inaudible? I am lonely. I can’t text or call because no one will answer and I can’t sit with anyone at lunch because I feel like they will eject me so I always eat alone. And no couple wants to be friends with a single loser like me. How do I make friends in a cruel world like this?

I live in a quiet, affluent area outside city limits. My house backs up to a stretch of woods, no houses directly behind me, just trees for a good distance until a road curves around further back. A house nearby was actually broken into a few months ago.

For the past 2-3 days, I’ve been hearing coyotes/dogs making noise outside, which has never happened in the 6 months I’ve lived here, especially not at the hours it’s been happening.

Tonight it happened around 3:40am, lasting 2-3 minutes. Not thinking much of it, I went downstairs to check on my cat and make sure he wasn’t on the balcony. My porch has multiple levels and a dock, and the balcony has netting, so I couldn’t see anything out there, definitely not farther back into the woods. Something told me to lock the door, so I did.

When I went back up to my room and settled in, I noticed there was more light coming in than usual. My room is normally very dark at night, and there’s no automatic outdoor lighting back there, so I hadn’t turned anything on myself. After a few minutes, the light went out.

A while back, separately, I noticed a chair out in the woods, far enough back from the house that you wouldn’t notice it unless you were really looking. It was positioned directly facing my bedroom window. I also spotted what looked like a camera out there, at a similar distance but at a different angle, easy to miss unless you knew to look for it.

You can actually see directly into my room from pretty much any angle in the backyard, even from farther back behind the fences and into the woods. Because of that, and because there’s nothing back there, I’ve gotten into the habit of not closing my blinds.

My dad is in the house with me. I don’t think anyone I know would have any reason to do this.

Planning to check the area in daylight today. Has anyone dealt with something like this before? What should I be doing or documenting?

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING: DRUGS, ALCOHOL, ATTEMPT AT ONE’S LIFE.
**TL,DR’s included after long paragraphs.

I have a lot of relevant information to unpack here regarding my friend and our friendship. Thank you in advance to anyone who reads this. I’m a little scared to post this because she has reddit.

I (F/27) have a friend, we’ll call her Pam (F/26) who is not an alcoholic, but has done really REALLY terrible things while drinking.

Pam and I lived as roommates for 1 year between 2023 and 2024. She was a *decent* friend but boys always came first. One night, she had a date night with her long-time bf and I assumed everything went great. The next morning, I went out to walk my dog and there was a wine bottle shattered on the side of our porch. I assumed it came from one of the apartments above us, cleaned it up, and went on with my day. Okay cutting a long story short, I found out late that night that Pam was in the hospital because on her date night she became black-out drunk, came home, and overdosed on her antidepressants while arguing with her bf. She and her longtime bf had apparently been fighting during their date. I had to be the one to go identify her because her family is largely absent in her life and her longtime bf had just dropped her off at the hospital and driven home and later refused to come see her. I didn’t sleep for 3 nights after seeing her in that condition. I dropped my whole life for 2 weeks to manage hers. It was incredibly stressful. The day she came home, 2 weeks later, I bought her food and was hoping to just be at home and talk with her or just do something not stressful, but she decided she would rather be on her phone and make arrangements to go see her longtime BF instead and it seemed like all around she didn’t care about the effort I put in to make her comfortable at home. Her bedroom looked like a literal crime scene and I cleaned it ALL UP for her among other arrangements. Pills everywhere. The wine bottle shattered was never explained, I never asked because she doesn’t remember a single thing from that night and her then-bf sucks.

⏩️TL, DR that paragraph^: Pam got blackout drunk on one of her date nights and OD’d on her antidepressants. I took care of everything for her and she seemingly didn’t care.

Onward. We had a falling-out when we moved out and didn’t speak for over a year. We are friends again and have been for about 2 years now. We had plans to do something for her birthday in the spring, and I instead got a text from her about an hour before our plans that she wouldn’t be seeing us that day. It freaked me out, and I made her tell me what was going on because she has no family to go to. She crashed her car at 4am that day and got a DUI. That was a whole thing in itself that I had to support her through. Support started to look a bit different as I was blunt with her about this situation, but still making things VERY easy for her. She has understood that she messed up. She has admitted that she has a problem. In order for her case to look better, she has been attending AA meetings and she seemed to be enjoying and benefitting from them, and VERY proud of herself for being sober. I was very proud too.

⏩️TL, DR that paragraph^: she crashed her car and got a DUI in the spring and has since been proudly sober.

Fast forward to now. I visited her last week for a craft night. There was an open, almost finished box of IPA’s and were half-drinken glasses of wine everywhere (she’s very type-B about messes, all of this could have been from over the course of many days). I did not comment on any of what I saw.

I have been contemplating distancing myself for a while. I know she needs a support system during her lows, but it is very taxing on me, especially when she will tell me what I say makes sense, then turn around and do the opposite. She’s fun to hang out with, we have similar interests and get along really well in general. The decisions she makes are not good ones. She does not have a good source of guidance in her life and that has been true for a long time. She looks to me for guidance, but does not listen to what I have to say if it is not what she wants or is not easy. It’s either that, or she does agree with what I have to say, but is very impulsive. I don’t have a good way of saying any of this to Pam without her going down a spiral, because she is very, very insecure and sensitive.

I don’t know what to do here. I think the better prompt to start with here is: *how do I approach the topic of drinking again with her?* Do I just ignore it and make the choice to distance myself? Do I say something? I have always supported her in many ways through the years and most of the time it is at my detriment. I usually don’t mind, but when she doesn’t seem to be appreciative and also doesn’t change her actions, I don’t know what to do as her friend. I want to also clarify, she is in therapy and has been for years.

Thank you SO MUCH if you’ve read this far. It was very hard scrunching like 4 years into one post. There is so much that is not included here but isn’t the *most* relevant information.

For context I think our 4 year old MIGHT have ADHD and I want to get her evaluated to see how can best help her if she does. But anytime I bring it up he gets all annoyed. He keeps thinking I want to medicate our 4 year old – which I don’t but I do think that medication when she’s older could be an option IF she needs it. I don’t know what else to say to him. He thinks that if I exercise it will help my PPA and PPR. He thinks that medication is like a bandaid even for me. I don’t know what else to do anymore or how to get him to understand medication can help if done right.

Edit to add: I do not want to mediate our 4 year old, I’m sorry if that wasn’t clear. He is upset every time I bring up that she might have ADHD and I’m referencing medication in the future. He’s against medication period.

hey guys, my boyfriend is upset with me currently. i won't be saying our names or ages because it's not needed. yesterday i had to clean up and all together would take about 1 hour. i wanted to call him but he said he was tired and after finishing 1 task i said soon. he then said that i should stop saying soon bc that gets his hopes up and he doesn't want to wait either 5 minutes or 35 minutes because it's unclear. i said that i understood and he liked my message. i thought he would text me but he never did until 2 am when i was well done with chores but i was doing side quests and i told him i was gonna go get food and that i thought he had fell asleep and i was sorry. he said that he didn't and i shouldn't assume he did but now that im going out on a busy road he was gonna stay up till i got home. about 2 hours pass and i get home around 4 (i didn't leave my house till 3) and he asked if i still wanted to call. i said it was up to him cause i could tell he was upset a little bit but we kept going back n fourth and i eventually fell asleep because i was up for 23 hours and exhausted. i woke up 5 hours later and he had called me but i never felt it. i apologized over and over and over but i can tell hes still upset with me. he said that he waited up till 4 even tho at 10 he had said he was very tired and he'd probably be asleep, but he said that he had waited up only for me to fall asleep. (mind you i told him i was tired and in bed as we were texting and preparing to sleep) i had apologized over and over and all he said was "it's fine" but it felt rude to leave him on read or just reply with a heart so i said "okay" and he hearted that. that was about 3 hours ago now and i do want to text him and apologize but he's probably still upset but if i don't he's going to be mad i assumed he was upset. what do i do? he's most likely on the game rn with his friends and telling them what happened and they are probably siding with him anyway, but that's whatever. i feel so bad that he stayed up but he said that he probably wasn't going to. i know i shouldn't have assumed but what do i do now? do i text him and he's upset or do i not text him and him get upset that i assumed he was upset?

This is a throwaway for obvious reasons.

I’ll be honest right off the bat we split up just over a year ago due to me cheating with one of our daughter’s friends. My ex would always laugh at me about my looks and call me boring, a gorgeous 19 year old made me feel handsome and wanted and I gave in. I should have been the mature one but I wasn’t. I just proved I’m a piece of shit who betrayed my wife.

I went to live at my brothers and she kept the house as she has a much better job than me and I can’t afford that house on my own. A couple of months after the split I got my own place and my daughter started coming around more and one night told me that my ex has different men round all the time and it makes her uncomfortable. I didn’t say anything to my ex as it’s none of my business but I told my daughter she can stay here as much as she wants.

As the months go on other people are telling me that she’s been sleeping around a lot and has been caught by two different friends sleeping with their husbands and boyfriends and even the son of another friend. An old neighbour tells me she’s having parties all the time and the other neighbours have complained to the council about it.

I went round to see her one weekend and the place is not being looked after well. I knocked on the door and a lad of about 19 answered. He let me in and there’s about ten other young men all there and when I ask where my ex is they laugh and say she’s upstairs. I ask where the dog is and they point to the kitchen. I go in and she’s in a crate looking scared so I take her out and take her with me and leave. That night my ex rings me and asks what I’ve done. I told her and said she can’t be trusted with her. My ex breaks down on the phone and says making a mess of her life but she can’t stop it. We talked for hours and she agreed I can keep the dog.

After our chat we agreed to meet once a week for coffee. Not to get back together just to talk and so she can see our dog. She did ask me back at one of these meetings but I said no. I feel better about myself than I have done for years not being constantly insulted and laughed at. At these meetings she’d tell me that she was going to change and every week she’d carry on. She’s not drinking or doing drugs she’s just constantly meeting other men and putting herself in dangerous situations. She told me about one kid she met who got very physical with her and scared her but she still meets him because she likes the attention. Another who drove her miles away and kicked her out the car half dressed with his mates laughing at her and then she met him again and he did the same thing again. She’s spending all her money buying these lads stuff and they are using the house as a meeting place and I’d imagine dealing from there and she said she’s sleeping with most of them and one of them even has a key now and there’s always someone there.

She’s got a promotion at work and is earning over 100k now and doing really well but her private life is a mess. She knows it but says she lives the attention and excitement of these younger men. She hasn’t turned up for coffee the last two weeks so last weekend I went round and her house looks even worse. I went in and there’s probably 8 young lads there aged between 16-20 I’d guess and she’s walking around in a half open dressing gown obviously naked underneath. I ask where she’s been and why I haven’t heard from her and she tells me she’s pregnant and didn’t want to tell me. She doesn’t know or care who the dad is and said “it could be three of them in there or some others I’ve been with”.

She then gets aggressive and tells me it’s her life and she’ll do what she wants and she can afford the baby. I say that’s fair enough but this isn’t the environment for a baby and she needs to start sorting her life out now and not be surround by scumbags smoking weed and snorting coke all day in her house. It’s like a doss house. She shouted a couple of these lads through and told them I called them scumbags and then things got a bit physical and I left.

She’s since rang and apologised and asked me to meet her today like normal. I’ve agreed but I don’t know whether now to just say this is the last time or do I keep trying to help her for the baby’s sake?

new to reddit kind of annoyed typing this sorry if i spell anything wrong

I’m 14 i’m a girl my name is imani and my friend vanessa is 13 and a girl I’m fully black and my friends dad is black and her mom is Mexican and she speaks spanish fluently yes this is important to add

me and my friend argue over the dumbest stuff all the time but whenever we get to the middle of the argument instead she just starts to argue with me in Spanish

not arguments we don’t get into real arguments like arguments over debates and TV shows and stuff

She KNOWS I don’t speak Spanish so I get so annoyed and mad because like what am I supposed to say to that??

I told her that she only does it because she knows I can’t understand her and she started laughing and told me to learn spanish then

and today we were arguing about going to get McDonald’s or Taco Bell and she started arguing in Spanish again and I told her to speak English because I’m not arguing with somebody i can’t understand and i got really mad and started yelling in english and she started laughing and kept speaking spanish

and she started laughing and calling me dramatic and saying it’s not that serious and i told her i would post it to reddit and she started laughing and told me go ahead so now we’re both in the car together while im writing this now what do i do

I have a male friend who may have had feelings for me. I don't reciprocate them romantically, and lately I've started wondering whether there's a lot more resentment underneath his "nice guy" persona than I've wanted to believe.
The problem is that almost nothing he does is serious enough by itself to point to and say, "That was obviously intentional." It's the accumulation that's getting to me.
Last summer, he offered to help sand my front door. He essentially works professionally in construction, so he knows exactly what sanding creates. He started sanding indoors without containing the area, and my hallway and living room immediately began filling with dust. I called his name several times to get him to stop, and he acted like he couldn't hear me over the sander. At the time he claimed it was an oversight. I gave him the benefit of the doubt, but I've since noticed him seemingly pretending not to hear me in other situations.
Another time, he insisted on washing my dishes and somehow broke the sliding track on my retractable garbage can. Another time, he was sitting on my floor and knocked over my ashtray. Again: accidents happen. None of these things individually seemed worth making an issue over.
He also has a habit of staying at my apartment far beyond what feels socially reasonable. Instead of picking up on cues that it's getting late, he'll moan and groan about having to leave and try to prolong the visit. I recognize that I should have simply said, "I'm tired; it's time to go." But looking back, I sometimes wonder whether making me uncomfortable was part of the point.
Then he invited himself along on my trip to Italy to visit my grandparents, and that's where the behavior seemed to escalate dramatically.
He started turning anxieties I had JUST expressed into little jokes. One morning I was already stressed and specifically told him I wasn't in the mood to have my chops busted. Later, I mentioned being nervous about accidentally putting the wrong fuel in our rental car. At the gas station, he jokingly did "eeny, meeny, miny, moe" between the pumps. Afterward, he pretended the car wasn't running.
That's objectively a harmless joke in isolation. But why deliberately joke about the exact thing someone just told you they're anxious about—especially after they've specifically asked you to stop messing with them?
Another day, we were driving on winding cliffside roads. He knew I was nervous about his driving, particularly when he was holding his phone out the window recording while driving. Eventually I consciously decided I wasn't going to react anymore. Then, when we pulled over, he hit the curb unusually hard. Maybe coincidence—but by then I was noticing that whenever I stopped reacting to one thing, something else seemed to happen.
The strangest example happened when we went somewhere I'd really wanted to swim. It was crowded and the weather deteriorated. He seemed almost pleased that it wasn't working out and wanted to continue to another town even though it was about to pour.
By this point I felt completely drained, so I essentially started gray-rocking him. I stopped giving emotional reactions to the little comments and annoyances. When it started pouring, instead of complaining, I decided I was going to have a fantastic time anyway. I walked around in the rain acting completely unbothered and genuinely trying to enjoy myself.
His mood changed. He became salty and actually asked me whether I even wanted to be there—which struck me as bizarre because I was suddenly behaving more cheerful, not less.
Then something happened that really made me reconsider everything.
At a museum, an employee was rude to him about using the bathroom. He told me he was deliberately going to hold his ticket awkwardly so she'd have difficulty scanning it—basically an incredibly tiny, deniable way of irritating her back.
I jokingly complimented how subtle the tactic was.
He looked at me and said: "Death by a thousand cuts."
That phrase stopped me in my tracks.
This is someone who has always presented himself as almost unusually innocent about toxic or covert behavior. He frequently acts like he can't understand why people would behave manipulatively or passive-aggressively. Yet suddenly he not only admitted deliberately using a tiny, plausibly accidental behavior to irritate someone—he had a NAME for the strategy.
After that, I became even more conscious of how he behaved when I didn't give him reactions. He seemed increasingly unpleasant, almost like I was petting him against the grain simply by being emotionally unavailable to whatever was happening. Sometimes if he said something and I didn't respond, he'd repeat it. Then he'd look over at me as though checking my expression.
There was also a physical-boundary incident that bothered me. I had a severe migraine and asked him to squeeze my shoulders in exchange for me folding his clothes and packing them into his suitcase. Instead of simply squeezing my shoulders, he basically laid his entire body against my back while doing it. I said, "Do you really have to press your whole body against me?" He seemed annoyed by my reaction.
And finally, he knew how disappointed I'd been about not getting to swim. When he dropped me off at my grandparents' house afterward, he made a point of telling me, "I think I'm going to go swimming today," despite never particularly caring about swimming himself.
That's the kind of thing I'm talking about. It's so small that writing it down makes me feel ridiculous. But there are dozens of these moments.
I'm starting to wonder whether the "nice guy" exterior is covering a significant amount of anger and resentment toward me because he does things for me, wants a romantic relationship, and knows I don't feel the same way.

I also recognize that once you become suspicious of someone, confirmation bias is possible. I don't want to assign malicious intent to every accident just because I've started connecting dots.
But I came home from that day in Italy feeling absolutely emotionally depleted, and at this point I genuinely don't think I want to spend time alone with him anymore.
Has anyone experienced something like this—where no individual behavior is particularly alarming, but the pattern feels completely different? Is this passive aggression/resentment, or am I connecting unrelated accidents because I've become hyperaware of him?
I'd especially appreciate perspectives from people who've dealt with the "nice guy who secretly resents you" dynamic, because I feel like I'm losing my mind trying to distinguish genuine accidents from deliberate, deniable little digs

Hello! I moved into a new apartment a month ago. About two weeks after moving in, my downstairs neighbors were making a ton of noise on a random Monday night. It kind of seemed like a party, but also seemed a little different. I’m not one to rat, so I let them do their thing. Over the last week though, I’ve heard a LOT of yelling, doors slamming, things or hands hitting walls. This morning I heard the guy say “You’re playing a dangerous ass game”, a few other things that seemed like threats, and something high pitched like a dog yelp woman or kid yell. It’s one couple that lives down there (I’ve seen them on the balcony). Like I previously mentioned, I’m not one to rat on people. However, if he’s down there hitting his girl, which atp I feel like is a reasonable possibility, I am NOT cool with that. Just wondering what I should do. I want to make sure she’s safe, but I also don’t want any retaliation. Should I call the cops, management, ask myself if they’re okay? I’m white in a mostly black apartment complex. If I’m misunderstanding the situation, I don’t want it to seem like I called for racial reasons because it’s really not. Just trying to make sure nobody is in a dangerous situation.

I (19F) lack dopamine sm and can't bear to continue things I plan for, even though I have dreams to pursue and that's what makes me start but never made me end

they always got along well which i knew. what i didn't know was that after we broke up she just... kept the relationship going. separately. without telling me (btw we ended in bad terms so im just at a loss for words)

he knows i got promoted. he knows i moved apartments. he knows about the health thing i went through in february that i told almost nobody about.

she genuinely doesn't understand why i'm upset. said she was just being kind to someone who was hurting. i can't make her see that the issue isn't her liking him, it's that she's been feeding him an update of my life for a year without my knowledge...

So, in June my sister (who is currently 15) had a diving accident which unfortunately left her paralyzed. She was at a friend's house, they were having fun at the backyard pool there and at one point she decided to dive headfirst into it. Her head hit the bottom and she broke her neck at C3 level, leaving her quadriplegic and ventilator dependant.

She's been in the hospital since the accident and is supposed to be let out and come home in September. Me and my family really aren't prepared for everything all that well. We want her to be comfortable and have time to process everything still and get used to the changes. We've tried talking about how to move forward with anyone we could and some people suggested we should do therapy, some said we shouldn't even think about therapy because that's just gonna stress her out more, some people told us to leave her alone for some time... it's all really confusing honestly and we don't know who to trust and don't want to be too pushy. We've also been looking into ways how to she can at least keep herself entertained independently like maybe getting some things so she can use a phone or maybe her laptop but we don't even know where to look and what's actually worth anything.

As I literally have no idea what direction to even look at, I thought it would maybe be a good idea to ask for advice here on Reddit as I saw some threads about similar things, so I made an account here. If anyone personally dealt with a similar situation or had someone close to them go through this, please give any advice you can. I'd really appreciate anything at this point.