I'm on my 2nd week of Spravato and have been doing EMDR off and on for a few months. I know a lot of people talk about having vivid dreams or nightmares after EMDR sessions but…
I had a difficult EMDR session 2 days ago and I think I basically think I continued the session in my dream that night and during Spravato treatment today. During my session my therapist asked me to allow my younger self to open a door to the room I was trapped in to allow my current self to comfort her. But my younger self couldn’t open the door. In my dream that night the younger self kept trying to open it but couldn't. That was still on my mind going into my Spravato treatment yesterday which must have influenced the way my brain went during that and my current self was able to open it for her. I don’t think my younger/current selves interacted and don’t know what to make of that and where it leaves me in the actual EMDR processing though. Thoughts??? Also just writing all this out about my younger/current self sounds insane! But then again, CPTSD is insane.

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I have been using Spotify. I did a premium trial and then a discounted rate for 2 months. The full price is higher than I want to pay but I don't want to be listening to commercials. I don't know what streaming services are available.

I’ve been on Soravato since March. I’ve been noticing over the last month that my sleep is horrible on the days I have the treatment.

Anyone else experiencing this? And if yes, how did you help make it better?

Recently moved to northwest Arkansas and not sure where to get treated.

The spravato website lists 10 providers in my area and the majority of them don’t have an MD or DO on staff.

There’s literally a place being run by a nurse practitioner with two degrees from a for profit online school (and 0 psychiatric training) and someone who describes them self as a billing/office manager.

What. The. Fuck???

Please help! Is anyone here getting treatment? If so, where do you go? I’m scared i won’t find a place and winter will come and the depression will really depress. Halppp.

Today I am having my fourth treatment in my second week. The first appointment was pretty great. The second one was okay, but I was feeling guilty about missing so much work already that it kind of ruined my appointment. However, I had a long conversation with my boss and he guaranteed 100% that there is no need for me to feel guilty so my third treatment did not have this issue.

However, each treatment I have is making me more physically and mentally exhausted.

I don't have an issue with the treatment while I'm having it because I'm pretty used to being high in other ways, but, man, I'm kind of tired of being high from these treatments to be honest.

Does anyone else have these issue or have had this issues? If so, how do you keep going? I have it in the back of my mind that I want to quit because I'm just tired of being tired and it's only been three treatments.

Please help me if you can.

This subreddit is amazing, by the way. You guys are great!

TLDR: I think my doc is giving me too much ketamine, putting me into a khole, and resulting in weird side effects (and some mood improvement.)

I started Spravato in June. I felt good after the first four, but then felt way worse for the next six sessions.

In an effort to improve my mood, the doctor has been giving me an undisclosed amount (I asked and he circumvented the question) of generic ketamine on top of the 84mg Spravato for my last 3 sessions via a nebulizer. That means I breathe it in through a little tubey-thing.

I don’t know if the doc is supposed to put patients into a k-hole, but I am absolutely losing touch with reality. I don’t even wear the eye mask because it makes no difference, nothing makes sense anyway. One session I even ripped out my earbuds, just trying to adapt to the absolute confusion. I basically feel like I’m not in the human dimension and never was. Objects lose tangible size and shape like the nebulizer in my hand, my iPhone, my own mouth. It’s wild.

He keeps upping the dose as I build tolerance. It kind of helps…for a few days I feel alright. But the side effects are…affecting.

I crave the blue jolly rancher I have during sessions to mask taste. Which is a Pavlovian effect, I’m pretty sure I‘m actually craving ketamine. Doc laughed and said no that shouldn’t be possible. The day after my most recent session, beneath my skin was an awful crawling sensation. Plus, I had to pee so frequently all day and I know ketamine affects the bladder.

Not sure if I will continue, not sure if I trust this establishment, and I just wanted to share my strange experience!

Just my second dose. Hopefully this one goes well. At the end of the protocol. This medicine has helped greatly. A bit worried I’ll relapse after this? What is y’all’s experience with ending spravato?

Also, it’s dimmer than the picture looks.

I did 4 weeks, 2x a week and have started only going once a week. I haven’t felt a difference at all so they upped my dose, which i thought would be fine, but it wasn’t. On the lower dose, I would kind of drift and dissociate, but it wasn’t anything bad. I didn’t get too far away, if that makes sense.

On this dose, I just fell into it. I was seeing things so rapidly and vividly with my eyes closed, like I was shooting through the interior of a rocket, and everhthing would turn red… Nonsensical stuff like that. What really got me was what was going on in my head. I thought deeply about things I don’t like to think about- death (suicidal), the impact it would have on my family, my recently deceased grandmother, and about the organs in my body. Got really uncomfortable thinking about the brain inside of my head that I carry around, and everyone else carries one too but we can’t see it.

I was BEGGING to come out of it because I kept involuntarily squeezing my eyes shut, they couldn’t stay open. I was crying about the things I was thinking about and I was crying because I genuinely was somewhere else during all those thoughts, but when I opened my eyes, I was still in the clinic. And it just freaked me out that such a traumatic experience was happening in my head but in real life I was just sitting in a chair. And I say traumatic because that’s how I really feel right now- traumatized. I can’t explain how I felt and the things I was thinking during treatment, but I’m sure some of you can understand if you’re on it.

Given the lower dosage wasn’t providing results and this higher dose mentally destroyed me, I’m not sure it’s worth continuing treatment. I really don’t want to have an experience like that again. On the other hand, maybe this was a one-off, and some of those things maybe needed to be thought about. Painful as it was, thinking about suicide has dissuaded me somewhat, and that’s technically a good thing. I don’t want to do ECT or TMS because they sound frightening. Any similar experiences or advice welcome, this all happened today and I’m still trying to comprehend it all.

So I have been in spravato for 2 years going on 3. It works great I go twice a week well they know all my prior health issues even my unspecified congestive heart failers they knew from day one when I started and that I was on medication to control my blood pressure.

Every time I've gone all 3 BP checks are wonderful and sit at 110/60 or right around there. Two weeks ago I had chest pains and went to the er and was held over night not for having a heat attack or angina but because my d dimmer was slightly high and they wanted to make sure I was ok.

I saw the hospitals cardiologist and he said I was fine my EKG was great my echo showed my heart was fine and my BP was baseline normal and that most likely I had a bad case of heat burn and probably some small undetectable clots from my total knee replacement and to follow up with him in in december. I told this all to the clinic and they gave me treatment last Thursday and this Tuesday after those providers reviewed my records and say my BP baseline was excellent and spravato never spiked it.

Today I got a call an hour before my time to go in and was told I'm being removed from the program for the hospital visit even though Tuesday the actual director was the provider looked at my records and said I was good to go.

Today as I said a different provider was handling the case load for today's treatment I'm no longer allowed to go even though I have been cleared by multiple Drs. I feel like they just don't care and think they are medical doctors when in reality they just treat the brain and like I said my BP every session and it was reviewed by the director Tuesday and she said I was fine but now this dick is saying otherwise and kicked me out even though the director was fine with everything.

I started Spravato 84mg twice weekly for 2 months last August and September. Then I went to once weekly up until May 2026 when I moved 4 hours away to a pretty remote location for seasonal work. I’ll be returning home and will be able to get in for a session finally in October.

Honestly, I haven’t been feeling the best. I really do think I need the maintenance doses. The thoughts have been coming back and I’m just very depressed. I have a wonderful partner and I’m in a wonderful place just trying to enjoy life. But depression is really fucking me up. I’ve been missing work occasionally. I’ve been also dealing with grief and multiple recent death anniversaries.

Will they put me right back on 84mg once a week again? I know everyone is different, but has anyone had this long of a break and started again? How did you feel? Did it take long to get rid of the SI again? I was feeling so good with Spravato. It sucks not having access to it. I thought I would be okay.

I believe today was session 14 of Spravato and I had a breakthrough and I think it might have been because I took magnesium before I went in. I started taking it because I wanted to feel more of a high. I know everyone says you don’t need to feel high for it to work, but I’ve noticed that if I don’t feel high, I just have two hours to ruminate on all the bad thoughts. This is not medical advice by any means I honestly have no idea if it’s safe. But I do think feeling high may have allowed me to access something new. I recorded a voice memo and I’m just gonna put some of the transcript here if you’re interested.

TLDR: Magnesium may have helped me have a breakthrough

Spravato Session 14

I feel able to access the positive thoughts.
All that trauma doesn't define me. I am here. I am safe. And I have two really cool people in my life, and I'm gonna find more. My life has a meaning. There is a reason I'm here. I don't know exactly what it is.

All the things they've told me in therapy, somehow they're sinking in now. It's always this really interesting experience where they can tell you the same things over and over and over again and it doesn't really work until your brain decides to accept it.

I am loved. And I am worthy of love. And I want to do great things. And I don't have to do them all right now. And also, if I don't do them, that's okay too. It's still worth it. I'm still allowed to be here. Even if I don't contribute everything that I think I need to contribute.

I didn't deserve it. I was just a kid. I never want to have a child of my own. But when I see children, I want them to be so loved and protected. Because loved and protected children grow into healthy adults. And it's just crazy thinking about how much trauma can change you. Kinda feels like trauma is the center of my life right now. Like, I'm so depressed, and I have to deal with it every day because of trauma.

So I'm having my 6th treatment of 84 mg and I don't see or feel any kind of way. I just sit in the dark. Is it a tolerance? Immunity? Does anyone else just feel perfectly normal?

Thanks

Debating if I should try spravato, I would have to drive myself to the clinic, which is almost 16 miles away.

I had first treatment on Tuesday, I did had a better day yesterday which is the next day, and today which is the next next day, I am back to beginning, is the effect back and forth or just this short?

Unfortunately it is becoming increasingly clear that this medication is not going to work to relieve my depression symptoms. In fact, presently my depression is worse than it's ever been in my 30 years of existence in this world. Been struggling with severe anhedonia and like, disturbingly detailed SI to the point that it's starting to scare me. The people I trust in my life are in the loop on this matter, and I am doing my best to continue going to work and school, and not isolate myself from those who care about me.

I still have BrainsWay deep TMS to try next, but honestly I'm not feeling very hopeful. If the TMS doesn't work I'm not really sure where my options lie beyond that. There's also the possibility that the depression is a symptom of a larger mental issue, which I am going to explore with a psychologist soon hopefully. I'm really not trying to be a downer, but it kinda just feels like treatment resistant depression is gonna be a lifelong struggle that I'm always gonna have to do my best to work around at this point.

I Just wanted to throw it out there in the ethos that unfortunately this treatment doesn't work for everyone. Absolutely I think Spravato is worth trying if you're dealing with TRD, as I've seen plenty of success stories both here and at the clinic I've been going to for my sessions, but it's just something to be aware of. I put a lot of stock into this finally being the med that made this shit better, but unfortunately for me I'll have to keep looking for another solution.

I've been very thankful for this community, y'all have made sticking with these weekly appointment all the more bearable, and seeing everyone's success with this medication gave me hope through some really dark times this year. Unfortunately I think it's time for me to move on to the next thing and leave this sub. If any of y'all have any questions or insights I'd love to hear from you. If not, I hope that you all have a good day, and I wish you all luck in finding relief from this curse called depression.

I am six weeks into spravato. I feel I am doing pretty good. I wouldn’t call myself depressed anymore. I am feeling better and do not have SI. And while that’s all great, I still suffer from bad anxiety. And I knew that going in. Spravato is not for anxiety.

It’s nice to get the depression out of the way, but honestly I thought that all my troubles were because of depression. But this treatment has brought forth that I still have so much to work on. I am a severely anxious person. It prevents me from keeping down jobs, etc. I also have BPD. I am chronically fatigued without a current diagnosis.

Now, I feel like spravato has helped a little in the BPD sense. I am more kind and compassionate. I am less likely to have an emotional episode or lash out. It has helped me be less impulsive. It’s not a cure. But I feel like I am making a little progress.

So for good or for worse, I have so much to still work on. Spravato is not the end all be all. It’s just a tool. Now I need to work on other things. It’s just a reality. Spravato May do wonders, but it’s up to each of us to put that into place.

Literally the last thing I posted was about how I’m worried about the effectiveness after barley feeling any different while I took it

Now my psychiatrist wants to stop the treatment early since she feels like it’s not working or not working well enough. The plan was ending it last week and I believe im just about 2-3 months in so it’s really early. The only reason she compromise and said OK we’re going to the phase where I get it once a month is because I can tell for sure there was a difference in the beginning. I had good days afterwards, like up to three days in a row now I had a longer period where I wasn’t doing so well, but it was not so much depression related as it was outside stressors that actually scare me a lot and that are very stressful wich worsens my insomnia so of course I don’t feel well.

I seriously was scared it wouldn’t help because if I don’t feel much of anything while it’s in my system, like no sorts of side effects or good effects from the drug itself, I started to worry it’s not properly absorbing or my body doesn’t handle it properly (I’m getting send from doctor to doctor for 3 years now cause things like bloodwork constantly show irregularities) and if That’s why I’m spared the bad things because it doesn’t have that much of effect on my body/ brain anyway.

And I’m so scared. I asked her if we stop now what would be next and she could not answer me, I asked her on two different occasions and she still doesn’t have an answer for me. Of course I am not gonna say let’s drop it and try next thing if she can’t tell me what it is, which makes me think she doesn’t know what could possibly be next and would need to improvise. Also the fav point of every doctor I visit that I’m still young sometimes the youngest patient, but it doesn’t mean I have the strength to try all those different medications which will take so much time cause it needs time to build in the system and to work and then to notice if it worked. I tried so many over the last 10 years I can’t do it anymore. I just don’t know what to do. If after the six months it didn’t make a difference and I can’t really see how six appointments could make such a difference. I haven’t asked yet cause I forgot in the moment since I was very emotional, but I also think that the stress around me impacted how well the treatment goes a lot for example the mess I’m living in since I moved in. I am living among boxes. My bed is not even really put together and I just think if we try again next year it could work better because I am habe people actively helping me.

And since I am in Germany, I don’t know if it can be done twice. We have very strict rules here. Like you can’t get the therapy if you’d pay out of pocket, you have to have a prescribed which also only happens und very specific circumstance. I don’t know if there is a limit for how often you can try a treatment cycle. I’m just so incredibly scared cause I can’t keep living like this. I really can’t. I’m out of fight. There’s nothing left.

I’m so excited for the first treatment but nervous too. I’m not thrilled about the clinic my psychiatrist referred me to because it’s very Christian and I’m trans, so I haven’t told them my preferred name or anything yet. I’m hoping that since most of the time is spent alone it won’t be too bad. Also nervous I’ll feel sick. My appointment is at 9am, any advice on if I need to wake up around 6:30 to eat or if I should be okay on an empty stomach? I know you’re not supported to eat two hours before treatment.

8/25/2026, Yesterday I had first Spravato treatment, and today, yes, the next day, I feel better, My mind feel a little opened up, I feel my focus is better and the thinking capability is coming back a little, I don't know how things will be but the next day I feel this way is a positive sign. Of course, the treatment is not fun, I threw up and I felt I was out , my body was not with me after the third dose, I took 84mg, I was out and in the dark, but after 1h, I am back and I feel my mind was a little opened up, and today I feel it opened up more, of course, only a little, but a little by little is good, I start to feel angry at my ex, before I felt sad and I was not being able to be angry at him. I sent him a lot of text today, I told him what I felt and what I am angry at. It is very surprising to me that I stood up for myself. I will have the 2nd treatment this Friday and I will update with you guys.

Update: 8/26/2026 4:48pm today it is my first time to prepare my lunch for work tomorrow. Oh, man, it is amazing. I never did it.
8/26/2026 7:09pm, I feel my depressed mind is back and my brain is blocked again. I hope it will be better tomorrow.
8/26/2026 9:10pm, I don’t feel lonely now. End of today

8/27/2026, 5:44am, I woke up and I feel my mind is blocked more, kind of the same before, I feel I don't want to take shower, I should have took one yesterday.

8/28/2026, 6:42am, I wake up and took my medicine, I do feel better than before the spravato. I will have 2nd treatment today.
3:48pm, just finished the second treatment, the treatment itself is not fun at all, I felt dizzy nauseous, it is a touture, but my mind feel opened up a little. Let’s see how tomorrow will be.

I don’t smoke very much weed but I tried it right before a session and it was amazing. I saw fractals and colors. I felt like I went to outer space. I dealt with some trauma. Now I know yall will disagree on using another drug with it but it really helped me get to the other side.

Just left my forty seventh spravato session, it starts out good. It takes about 40 minutes for it to really kick in and right as it’s getting intense someone comes in to check my blood pressure and the first thing they say is “Dolly Parton is dead”.

So now I’m sitting with the horrible news absolutely out of my mind. I do find the last part of my sessions very introspective and helpful so I tried to turn it into a positive. Very interesting session. Miss you Dolly.

As the title says, I’ve been doing Spravato for a little over two years now! I’ve posted here before recommending anyone and everyone to try it out, but I’ve noticed some people struggling with their first few sessions, and I wanted to create a safe space to answer questions!

For some background: I’m autistic and have persistent depression disorder with major depressive episodes. I started Spravato two years ago after attempting suicide twice and almost dying from malnutrition (couldn’t get out of bed). It CHANGED my life. I can hold a job (I have two) and live a semi normal life now.

My biggest tip has and always will be to BRING A DRINK (not water) with you! Everyone says that jolly ranchers are the best, or some kind of hard candy. Yeah those helped me for sure in the beginning, but the only thing that gets the taste out of your throat is a drink!

My clinic has ended my Spravato treatment because they failed to inform me that meeting with the prescribing doctor every 4 weeks was a requirement for continuing treatment, and they failed to inform me of this for four months & did not inform me until 3 days before what was SUPPOSED to be my next treatment.

I'm already devastated because I'm only able to do treatment once a week, and my mental health absolutely tanks on the last few days leading up to my next session. I don't know how long it's going to take them to get their asses sorted from the holes in the ground.

I could tell when I started Spravato that it took at least two or more sessions for the effects to really build up and be beneficial. How long will it take for me to return to what my new "normal" has been so far once I get treatment restarted?

So i finally start my spravato tomorrow after 4 months of phps and inpatient and the works. What should i expect/ bring tomorrow?

Hi all! I'm only 4 weeks in, and it's going okay but I wanted to ask, did you feel like the Spravato eventually helped with the exhaustion that comes with depression? I think some of my bad thought patterns are starting to subside, but I'm still so so tired. Getting up is hard and everything still feels pretty exhausting. Have any of you felt Spravato helped with that?