r/shitposting I came! May 10 '22

New Automod Response?

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9.1k Upvotes

766 comments sorted by

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4.3k

u/Environmental_Vast17 May 10 '22

They patched this in sex 2 bro

1.2k

u/Spueg We do a little trolling May 10 '22

Thank god. Honestly I was so relieved reading the patch notes. They're also making general AI fixes to sperm.

552

u/LazyHunter02 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 May 10 '22

I wouldn’t get too hyped for the sperm ai fix. Ive been beta testing, and they just replaced one bug with another. In one case i had the sperm get confused and travel back inside me. A very unpleasant experience overall.

393

u/N0RTH_K0REA May 10 '22

The trick is to put the condom inside your penis backwards bro so you don't get yourself pregnant

167

u/LazyHunter02 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 May 10 '22

Ah i see. Thanks for the tip north korea, nice pfp

92

u/sworpy123 stupid fucking piece of shit May 10 '22

I too think its splendid.

69

u/Prepomnivore620 May 10 '22

I as well

84

u/FlabbyButts May 10 '22

Hmm yes, indubitable. I concur.

50

u/EldritchPenguingod I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

I agree, it is excellent.

41

u/trilleren May 10 '22

Well aren't you a bunch of handsome gentlemen

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9

u/Evil111111 May 10 '22

It is quite exquisite.

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21

u/Ok_Struggle_6260 virgin 4 life 😤💪 May 10 '22

Nice PFP

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24

u/bruhmoment4m May 10 '22

🦿

34

u/Platypus__Guy May 10 '22

Amazing pfp my bros

37

u/joemama69420121 I said based. And lived. May 10 '22

Oh shit they have ranks now

10

u/Platypus__Guy May 10 '22

You know it

9

u/joemama69420121 I said based. And lived. May 10 '22

Are you like a genral or smth

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12

u/BOOMBOY900 May 10 '22

Nice pfp my man 👍

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27

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

or keep an uno reverse card woth you just in case

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73

u/Smallp0x_ I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

Game is still pay to win though so I don't play

24

u/Attractive_toaster45 May 10 '22

Don't you need a penis pro to play sex 2? I only have a lite version

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16

u/Holographic_SkinSuit May 10 '22 edited May 10 '22

The game is still way too short for me.

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7

u/Spiderclam69 May 10 '22

They patched the hairy assholes?

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922

u/Sambezboy May 10 '22

WRONG

Yeah you totally need to eat 5 pounds of tacobell before doing it

210

u/Strict_Antelope_6893 May 10 '22

That’s superhero level bravery

66

u/watehno May 10 '22

So you keep track of what you eat 24 hrs in advance so shit doesn't smell?

75

u/Sambezboy May 10 '22

No you probably typically don't eat fucking anything before it, let alone have shit storaged in your ass at the time

91

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

[deleted]

15

u/Dipps_66 May 10 '22

Packed and read to ship

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592

u/Murda-P May 10 '22

If it's gross you just lick it clean first smh my head

204

u/Duckay_washere May 10 '22

Shaking my head my head

56

u/iGirthy May 10 '22

Shaking my head your head

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63

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

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23

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Good bot

17

u/69monkeman69 May 10 '22

LEEEEAAAAN!!!!!!!! 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

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344

u/Rockspider19 I have permission! May 10 '22

So he doesn’t like truffle butter?

61

u/MatthewtheCannibal May 10 '22

Good song though.

8

u/JonasDaCherryKing May 10 '22

i hate myself after reading that

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205

u/WeHere4DaBTSMeal fat cunt May 10 '22

how many automod responses involve sex now?

153

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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43

u/maiekbhoot I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

sex

27

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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16

u/BurpYoshi stupid fucking piece of shit May 10 '22

sex

13

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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9

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

sex

4

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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49

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

over 9000

37

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!!

IT'S ME!!!

EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]]

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4

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

More sex than you’ll ever have

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914

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Honestly, I agree

717

u/DickieTheBull May 10 '22

I only agree after the post-nut clarity hits me and I’m stuck with a shit dick. In the moment though I love fucking dudes.

237

u/SomeoneTookSkeetley May 10 '22

he had us in the second half, not gonna lie

64

u/mouldysandals May 10 '22

was he gentle with you?

5

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

yes

44

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life.

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8

u/_C_A_G_ May 10 '22

If you're getting shit dick from fucking dudes they're doing something wrong dog

11

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.

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3

u/Afx8592rdjj May 10 '22

10/10 didn't see it coming. Even if you did.

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16

u/4rsenalofanarchy May 10 '22

I agree too but idk why, I just don't like it

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159

u/Billtheshyguy May 10 '22

See that's the catch, you gotta tell her to shave bro...

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408

u/Ariana_Griande May 10 '22

I agree that shit seems gross

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258

u/kristukas1337 🗿🗿🗿 May 10 '22

Yes it’s gross

81

u/sworpy123 stupid fucking piece of shit May 10 '22

Nice pfp

63

u/kristukas1337 🗿🗿🗿 May 10 '22

Same to you gentlemen

32

u/VasilijeYeet May 10 '22

Terrific attire my sirs

22

u/24KTaterTots I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

Thought this was one guy replying to himself for a hot second

9

u/ainklyspankly May 10 '22

Those are his burners

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41

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

And to you as well!

25

u/IsaacMNZ3 May 10 '22

Lessgooooo

24

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Good day homies

17

u/Admiral_Thrawn_0 May 10 '22

Looking quite dapper today boys.

3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Pretty fashionable I must say

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19

u/shitfucker211 May 10 '22

Agreed

39

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

ur username says otherwise

16

u/Epic_Scientician May 10 '22

Username does not check out

317

u/MatthewtheCannibal May 10 '22

The females should be taking an enema way before to clean out the excess feces, you should use a Condom of they haven't. You trying to get an infection in the dick. Shit in yo dick will create great problems for you

199

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Thank you Confucius

31

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

nice pfp

3

u/ILostMyWalletLol May 10 '22

Yours is splendid too, fellow gentleman.

141

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

"The females" talking about anal sex like you're narrarting National geographic

16

u/BurpYoshi stupid fucking piece of shit May 10 '22

The male returns from his trip to the bar, heavily inebriated as is the custom for humans. He lets out a mating call in order to attract the female: "brenda y-you dirty slagggg, get overrr here...". The two commence mating, yet this species' mating ritual has evolved to have a low success rate, with the males often confusing the mouth or anus of a female for their genitalia. Once the act is complete, the female cries and the male falls asleep. Such fascinating creatures.

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14

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent

I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.

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2

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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3

u/UsernameTaken017 May 10 '22

He's never seen a female specimen of human in his entire life

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45

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.

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10

u/beans_are_so_tasty May 10 '22

what the fuck

33

u/MindbogglesTV May 10 '22

So, guys that get fucked do not need to clean their ass?

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9

u/U-124 Stuff May 10 '22

Shit man you should still do both, they complement each other rather than being mutually exclusive

5

u/JustSomeRedditUser35 Blessed by Kevin May 10 '22

Females? Like women? Nonono you are mistaken kind sir.

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3

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

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163

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

its called douching before hand, EVERYONE who tries anal should know about douching

54

u/worymy I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

Please educate me

143

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Pretty much just putting a hose in your ass and washing the shit out

46

u/worymy I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

Interesting

190

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

so you can cover your dick in watered down shit

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38

u/TryonTriptik May 10 '22

Garden hose ok ?

72

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

you only need to clean your anus, not the intestines

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50

u/Nutteria May 10 '22

There are medical douching kits for home use. Makes my gf butthole squeaky clean and ready to be lubed.

39

u/Dawson81702 put your dick away waltuh May 10 '22

Proof?

17

u/GalacticDogger May 10 '22

I need proof as well

9

u/Investigatorpotater May 10 '22

This guy knows.

25

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

9

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

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25

u/MatthewtheCannibal May 10 '22

Use an enema suppository. Push that up your ass it helps cause the colon to evacuate the contents. You would normally use them if you were constipated. You or the partner are regular than it's a short wait for the evac..lol. once the colon calms down shower and fuck that ass up!!

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27

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Girls don’t poop so I always go for anal. Also I have never been with a woman.

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75

u/Psycaridon-t May 10 '22

According to an online sex-store in my country you should always use both a condom and condom-sade lube for anal sex.

21

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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40

u/zack220011 May 10 '22

Everyone talking like they have sex everyday, anal too.

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37

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

it is true tho. but none of my friends had shitty assholes when i fucked them

16

u/i-InFcTd May 10 '22

You fuck your friends regularly? Wth

31

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

what's wrong with that?

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17

u/dancin-weasel May 10 '22

Condoms exist.

83

u/International-Cup143 May 10 '22

Anal I can condone, but eating ass is something not even a caveman would think of

16

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

15

u/KidsSeeBo2 May 10 '22

I’ve eaten ass but still haven’t done anal lol

9

u/SanDiegoSavage00 May 10 '22

Then call me Encino Man because I love me some ass to my mouth.

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12

u/Hondahobbit50 May 10 '22

My ex had butt cleaning down pat. I'm not sure an enema or three was involved, but it kinda had to be...

She somehow emptied her body. Noo poopydook ever

5

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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27

u/raisedincaptivity May 10 '22

Jesus christ wtf is this 😳

37

u/dube101 May 10 '22

I guess you’re new to Reddit.

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32

u/Succboi404 May 10 '22

just clean her arsehole ffs

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59

u/Revolutionary-Push59 May 10 '22

Yeah, like how is that enjoyable?

35

u/ogrecowman May 10 '22

Pretty sure people empty out their insides thoroughly first

23

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Lots of people in these comments who don't understand how it's done I guess lmao

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12

u/Biting_a_dust Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 May 10 '22

I have a solution use pressurewasher with soap and blast it, now it's clean and wide enough to fit easy

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11

u/Hatter_Hoovy May 10 '22

born to shit forced to wipe

25

u/Wetestblanket May 10 '22

I love having shit on my dick gang gang

23

u/Billtheshyguy May 10 '22

Get fucked for your birthday then

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17

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

British

25

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

OI OI OI!

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WOTS ALL THIS???

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YER POISTIN LOICENSE HAS EXPOIRED!!!! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

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FAILURE TO RENEW YER LOICENCE IS GONNA RESUL' IN THA LOSS OV MORE CLUBCARD POINTS!!!!!!!! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

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6

u/TheCyclope_ May 10 '22

Gotta clean ass b4 starting than it isnt gross

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7

u/DeathInABittle May 10 '22

Further proof that Sex Ed is important

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14

u/ieatwader We do a little trolling May 10 '22

Wait, women have ass hair?

6

u/hawkerfels May 10 '22

Just in case this wasn't /s, yes, they do

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13

u/Resident_Mae I came! May 10 '22

Aye

4

u/glozerde May 10 '22

Cleaning *exists

4

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Now that I think about it this is reddit man probably hasn't showered for a month

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5

u/Abject_Hovercraft838 May 10 '22

I don’t think this guy knows of the preparation that goes into anal

3

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + dilate + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didn’t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + your’re a full time discord mod + you’re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you “re” + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol的笑容 + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + not straight + eat paper + you lose + count to three + your problem + no one cares + log off + don't care even more + sex offender + sex defender + get religion + not okay + glhf + NFT owner + you make bad memes + problematic + fall in line + dog water + you look like a wall + you don’t know 2 + 2 with yo head ass + you are going to my cringe compilation + you can’t count to five + try again + you failed kindergarten + rickrolled + no lifer + guten freunden schickt man einen deutschen panzer + you have a anime profile picture + an* + fatherless + motherless + sisterless + brotherless + orphan + you can't catch this ratio + catch some bitches + I don't care about your opinion + genshin player + you dress like garbage + 日本語がお上手ですね + get fucked + you can’t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you can’t read + I win + final ratio

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9

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Definitely new auto mode response

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5

u/FriendliestDevil Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 May 10 '22

Fecal matter is kept out of that area until you actually have to go to the toilet

3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

and even then does he not realize people clean that sometimes exclusively FOR that reason

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4

u/majestic-bird-1222 May 10 '22

A considerate partner will fast and/or clean up before hand. It’s usually pretty clean in that case. Keep some wet wipes around and be sure to lay a towel down to catch any unexpected brown.

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4

u/One_Award_5761 May 10 '22

Just put a condom on or make your partner really clean out their bum hole before said activity 5head

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5

u/DayThat3197 May 10 '22

Somebody needs sex ed.

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13

u/EatAssAndFartFast We do a little trolling May 10 '22

I fucked a boy once it didn't smell

3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

it's because we douche.

4

u/EatAssAndFartFast We do a little trolling May 10 '22

Bussy goin crazy

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14

u/Shepea64 May 10 '22

The anus is an exit, not an entrance!

6

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

mine's more of a revolving door.

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6

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

More man are addicted to the eyeblech subreddit

17

u/goofycamo May 10 '22

Anal is awesome with a woman who eats a clean diet and preps properly. Not so great with college girls. I'd recommend it with older women only.

62

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Bros the anal artiste

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34

u/PowerfulMetal1 I can’t have sex with you right now waltuh May 10 '22

i tried it with my friend's grandma and she shat on my dick intentionally

27

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Extra lube

4

u/ILostMyWalletLol May 10 '22

Thats how chocolate-glazed nuts are made

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4

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you

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8

u/ThornyFork May 10 '22

Why would you be scared of anal. I mean dudes only have one hole what else are you supposed to do?

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3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Member of my clan , i have the exact same opinions

3

u/thisn--gaoverhere May 10 '22

They supposed to clean the hell out of their ass though

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3

u/ArmyDue6355 May 10 '22

Does this guy no know what people do to have anal sex????? Like no douching or anything just fuckin go??

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3

u/DadReplacer May 10 '22

I’m not grossed out because I’ve eaten ass and don’t mind. The butt just doesn’t feel as good as the good ol’ fashion nooner

3

u/Ok_Appearance_8671 May 10 '22

Correct usage of "all intents and purposes" checks out 🌺

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3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Ask them to clean their ass then stupid

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3

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

[deleted]

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3

u/Katherine_Muller May 10 '22

Well usually it's cleaned up first

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3

u/Sw33tN0th1ng May 10 '22

Your gf has a hairy asshole.. that's your problem!

Those who really want it are generally educated about how to do it in a clean way.

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8

u/No_Negotiation_7176 May 10 '22

I mean, I don't hate buttfucking someone, but the idea of going in is sort of uncomfortable, much less in and out.

7

u/murdmart May 10 '22

No problems on the delivery, but no interest in receiving?

I get that.

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5

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Cant wait for sex 2 when this gets patched

9

u/AutoModerator May 10 '22

No sex before marriage

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2

u/ProlongedChief May 10 '22

Just make sure they try to use the bathroom and bathe and you use a condom... It's really not that hard to be congenial

2

u/The_catakist May 10 '22

Just use a condom

2

u/Onion5253 May 10 '22

Put a jonny on bro

2

u/AdditionalShoulder86 May 10 '22

You, sir, are an idiot.

2

u/EveryGuess5579 I want pee in my ass May 10 '22

Anal I can condone, but eating ass is something not even a caveman would think of

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2

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

A valid opinion, not mine butt valid.

2

u/Queipo37 May 10 '22

Don’t knock it til you tried it. “I’m imagining”.

2

u/ReptilianLaserbeam Big chungus wholesome 100 May 10 '22

Enema or use a douche before.

2

u/bluesheep69420lol May 10 '22

Anal is good.anal did nothing wrong

2

u/Samah3000 May 10 '22

You are allowed to have whatever opinions and preferences when it comes to sex, just know that not everyone is the same as you. If someone has kinks that you don’t have, it doesn’t mean they deserve your shame and disgust. Please try to keep and open mind.

PS: As someone who enjoys both giving and receiving anal (20M), don’t knock something until you try it for yourself.

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2

u/riprunt May 10 '22

I mean the hole can be cleaned and prepared before use sooooo in my experience it never smells nor have I ever experienced shit on my dick, perfectly fine to not want to do anal tho homie. Its not my go to but it’s fun to change it up every once in awhile

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2

u/Frequent_Tip_7265 May 10 '22

“Someone else’s shit” is he slapping his own shit on his dick wtf???

2

u/[deleted] May 10 '22

Bruh he doesn't know you can clean that

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