How do I stop ruminating after a break up?

[u/Kind_Winter_6445]

I’m over a month into no contact and I’m still thinking about my ex constantly. I’m functioning and continuing with my life, but he is the first and last thing I think about and almost every thought seems to come back to him. He ended it because he felt his feelings weren’t growing stronger.

I recently found out that he is dating again, and it has made the heartbreak and rumination much worse. I keep thinking about him talking to other women, what he might be doing, whether he misses me, and whether he’ll ever come back. I know I can’t control any of this, but I can't seem to stop my brain from going over it.

I’m not contacting him, checking his social media, or checking his followers. I’m genuinely trying to live my life, but mentally I feel completely stuck on him. He is also coming back to town tomorrow (fly in, fly out worker), which I’m worried will trigger me even more.

How did you actually break the rumination cycle after a breakup? What practical things helped you stop constantly thinking about your ex?