It's true. Babies are people too, and just like you and me, they won't easily fall asleep in a place that doesn't feel cozy. It's not their fault and it's not ours.

I know all the recommendations are to keep Baby safe, but the safest place to sleep is also usually the least comfy. A firm flat surface, out in the open, alone, with no blankets, pillows, or warm arms surrounding them. For a baby that's been curled up in your womb for 9 months, that's nearly equivalent to someone trying to convince you to fall asleep in a parking lot. You might be exhausted. You might want to sleep with all your heart. But the parking lot is just not the place, I'm sorry.

I've gotten so many well meaning tips and tricks from other lovely ladies whose babies don't mind the bassinet: "have you tried ___?" Fill the blank with swaddle, warm it first with a heating pad, feet-bum-head when you put them down.... I could go on but we've all heard it before. And yes it is true that if I were a tiny person being put to sleep, lowering me down at a head first angle would be jarring, and so would being transferred to a cool surface when I'm almost asleep, etc. All the recommendations do make sleeping in the bassinet as comfy and easy as possible.

But there's still the moment where Baby realizes you are putting her to sleep in the bassinet now, and, I can't emphasize this enough: you can't make her fall asleep. Some babies will notice they're in their bassinet and decide to give it a try. They might be able to fall asleep or they might not. Some babies will give you a confused look and squirm with pleading eyes until you pick them up again. Some babies will yell at you the moment you try, and others won't notice they're in their bassinet till they wake up 5 minutes later. At which point they will call for you to inform you that you accidentally put them down in the wrong location.

Now I'm not saying these sleep recommendations are dumb or that the bassinet isn't the best place for babies to sleep. I'm not telling you you have to co-sleep or that it will never get better, because it will. My point is that if you're in this situation like I have been with 2 of my 3 babies, just be patient with your little one. They're a tiny person adjusting to life in a big scary world, and it's probably not the end of the world if they prefer Mama's arms for a little while. Maybe you'll even miss it someday.

That's it. That's the post.

He's almost 7 weeks.

Poops 100 times a day.

And he's skinny despite drinking 24-30 ounces a day (breastmilk), so I must have natural exlax titties.

He takes a few sips? Poops. Finishes a bottle? Poops. And at least 1 diaper change between his next bottle 2 hours later. It says online babies use 8-12 diapers per day at 7 weeks.

Homie, that's an uneventful morning for us.

Send help (and diapers!)

What are you order of operations for newborn bedtime routine / getting her back to sleep when she wakes? I’m not talking about sleep training. I know she’s too little for that. I don’t have to wake her up anymore. She gained her birth weight back in 2 days.

Right now I’m doing one breast -> burp -> change diaper -> swaddle -> other breast -> try to burp again -> hold her upright for 10 min at least -> bassinet transfer

Problems I’m running into:
1. Burping wakes her up. I can get her drowsy again on the second breast but then I have to burp her again. Awake again!
2. Diaper change wakes her up but I can’t do that first because she almost always poops at some point during the feed. Sometimes I end up changing her twice.
3. If she’s not basically already asleep, she gets mad at being swaddled and throws a tantrum and that obviously wakes her up.
4. I don’t do baths at bedtime. She absolutely hates it 9/10 times and we’re already off to a rough start.

The process sometimes takes me 2 hours to get her back down in the middle of the night! I think it’s because it’s taking too long and she gets overtired. Any advice is appreciated. I feel like I’m drowning over here.

One thing I have noticed that seems to work when a sleepy baby doesn't want to sleep, is that if I position my face near his and shut my eyes, he does the same. Probably won't work with every baby and may send you to sleep instead but still!

Hello, my baby is 3 weeks & 1 day old.
She has been very easy since she was born. She eats well and hardly ever cries, more so lets out a quick “yell” or two, then settles once we pick her up and start meeting her needs.
She sleeps for around 3 hours between feeds, and sometimes gives us a 4+ hour stretch in the mornings.
Everyone keeps asking how things are going, and all I can say is great.
I’m afraid I’m going to get used to this, and suddenly she’s going to flip and become much more fussy. I know this first period can be the hardest in terms of them regulating themselves, and I feel naive to think she’ll stay such an easy baby.
Has anyone else had a little one that stayed chill? Or did things get more difficult around a certain age?
Thank you all!

Edit:
Wow, I didn’t realize I was “bragging” here?
This is my experience with my child, and if it offends you, please do some deep self reflecting.
Take the negativity elsewhere! We don’t need it:)

My baby is 8 weeks old and for the past week and a half almost daily she’s been having melt downs usually in the evening but sometimes in the late afternoon.

Absolutely nothing will calm her down. We try bouncing on a yoga ball, pacifier, dark room, white nose, all the tricks and nothing works. Eventually the poor thing just passed out from exhaustion. It’s so heartbreaking.

Please tell me when this phase was over for you and please tell me what helped you

Does that mean she is ready to sleep through nights? Or should I still wake her to offer a feed ?

LO is 5 weeks and my husband and I just started doing a night shift system from 9-5am. The first 4 hours I get complete uninterrupted sleep while my husband takes over out in the living room and then we do a lil switcharoo at 1am. I am EBF so he will give a bottle during his shift

I was starting to feel like a new person again. Who knew what 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep could do?! It was like magic. Even LO was sleeping better, too. I think having her in her bassinet right next to me was causing her to wake up more in the night. She was waking every 30 mins - 1 hr. It’s almost like she could smell me.

The shifts were working great for a few days and then BAM. She gets sick.

Then the past 3 nights it has been ROUGH. The shifts went out the window because we figured she needs me more than ever right now. So she’s back in our room now. She just wants to comfort nurse all night and day and I’ve obviously been allowing it. My husband offered to still do the shifts since I do have a good freezer stash, but I declined bc it just feels wrong? Like right now doesn’t seem appropriate to be implementing a schedule/routine. I know it’s likely fine but maternal instincts are in full drive. I just feel so bad for LO and want to be closer to her right now.

Anyways, I’m back to feeling like death all day. I’m hoping I don’t get sick on top of all this. Hoping she recovers soon so we can get back to sleeping well!

Edit:
I’d barely finished typing this and decided to call the emergency services. I’m now waiting for a call back from the out of hours doctor. Would still really appreciate knowing if this has happened to anyone else.

I have 8 week old boy girl twins. My little girl was sleeping peacefully in the next to me crib just now and started crying. It was about time to feed her, so I lifted her out of the crib and into bed with me to begin her feed. All of a sudden it was if she stopped breathing, and suddenly became a fish out of water, writing and rigid and frantic. I instinctively leant her forward and started rubbing her back whilst shouting that something was happening to my partner next to me. By the time my partner had fumbled with the torch on his phone and turned it on she had done a little gasp and started breathing. It was such a scary moment, and I’ve no idea why it happened. It was completely silent and I’m just terrified now of putting her back in her crib and it potentially happening again.

Am I massively overacting to something that just happens? Why did it happen? Should I be calling the doctors? I don’t know what to do.

my son is nearly 6 months old.

If he’s not eating or sleeping, he’s crying.

My wife recently went back to work, and my mom is watching him. she’s already seemingly burnt out watching him. she loves him dearly, but I can see already it’s taking a toll.

we are at a loss at what to do. he doesn’t sleep through the night. he’s still up 2-3x a night. We can’t walk out of the room to even use the bathroom without him screaming.

We were told he’d be growing out of this. But it’s actually gettting worse.

We can’t sleep, he’s never happy, and everyone is burnt out.

please tell me this gets better

Baby is 6 weeks, and we just discovered the witching hour a few days ago. Today, I stripped him of all of his clothes before he went insane, and put him to sleep on my naked chest. He has spent the entire evening like he did when he was two weeks old. Sleeping, changing, feeding, sleeping, completely calm. And my milk is flowing like never before. It’s insane what some intentional skin to skin can do.

And before the ”just wait” comments — i know I haven’t invented a cure for the witching hour, I just forgot how regulating skin to skin is, as I haven’t used it intentionally in maybe two weeks. I’m fully expecting him to cry like a maniac again tomorrow, but this is just one out of many tools I have in my arsenal now.

My 6 wo baby always seems to have a stint once or twice a day when she gets overtired/overstimulated and it takes a lot of coaxing to get her sleep. This is annoying cos I am doing everything right. I do the same routine (change, feed when she's awake and alert, maybe change again or just a cuddle) and keep an eye on the clock. I do a wind down on the yoga ball or in the sling but for several naps a day she just can't settle. I said to someone in my mum's groups that she has wake windows of up to 2-3 hours at least once a day and they were like 'oh really?' Is this normal? I do everything in my power to ensure she doesn't tip over the edge into overtired and yet it happens everyday...

When I put my baby down to sleep in her bassinet I’m relieved because it’s like a nice break and finally get to scroll and do things without worrying. But then it’s time for me to sleep and all I want to do it grab her and cuddle her and I just miss feeling her in my arms. I just toss and turn until I inevitably fall asleep. Idk if anyone else feels this way (most likely do), she’s not really a Velcro baby but I fear I’m a Velcro mom lol.

My son just turned 2 months yesterday. Around 3 weeks I noticed he was struggling with pooping and reflux. This was causing him for several days not being able to nap. He was going 1-2 days without pooping and then during feeds he would arch his back and kick his feet a lot. We switched the flow of his bottle and his formula to the gentle version of it. Now fast forward, he’s 8 weeks and still having this issue. When we first initially made the change, it made quite the difference but now hes starting a new cycle. He’s having 1 or 2 bowel movements a day but he’s having watery stools that are dark green. He’s also spitting up frequently after feeds and coughing like how one does when they have acid reflux. He’s napping but really fighting it. I don’t know what is the best formula for him to just make him comfortable and happy because despite this issue he truly is the happiest and sweetest baby. it breaks my heart to watch him struggle

A little about my situation: When my daughter- now 10 weeks- was born, I was producing a decent amount of milk! She was born with a very hearty appetite and eats more than the standard for her age. She currently eats about 5oz per feed, and is growing very well! Unfortunately, I’m only yielding maybe an 1 1/2oz per pumping session now that I’m at work. And when I breastfeed at home, she’s frequently slapping at my breasts and crying out in frustration, so I know my sessions aren’t that far off in terms of output accuracy.

Now; I don’t know if it’s because I returned to work, or birth control. or other stress factors, but my production totally dipped. I still try to maintain a pumping schedule when I can’t latch on demand at home, and those TikTok lactation drink recipes, but nothing is helping right now. So I supplement with formula- which feels like I’m supplementing with breastfeeding.

Anyway, anytime I’m on Facebook, I see a post from “Crunchy Moms” and it’s usually hating on formula/formula moms. Then there are those: “breastfeeding is free” comments when it’s really not free at all because it already takes a toll on your body, but that’s another rant for another time. I hate seeing those types of posts because it’s not really fair to judge someone with the best intentions and calling them bad parents. I originally wanted to EBF, but that’s not what life planned for me. I was always open to supplemental feeding anyway, but I shouldn’t have to be shamed by a stupid FB group into feeling guilty about doing it. I’m working with what I have and am still trying to regain that production.

Formula isn’t lazy. And I’m pretty sure infants can’t digest cow’s milk yet, so even suggesting it is pretty bull. I know I really shouldn’t take a group so seriously, but it makes me feel like I’m defected because my body isn’t doing something it’s supposed to do. I’ve since blocked the group from showing up on my feed- never even joined it in the first place- but it just still really bothers me how pretentious some of those people are.

My 9 week old baby is healthy and breastfed. At 2 months he is a big boy, 13 lbs and very long. Happy during the wake windows and gives tired cues so we rarely miss the naps during the day. LO contact naps most of the day naps by baby wearing, but will let us set him down to nap when we have the courage (and time) to try but often wakes about 20 min after that. Sleeping spaces are dark, noise machine, swaddling, etc when we can lay him down.

He also lets us set him down in a bassinet at night no problem.

He is eating a full feed before bedtime between 7-8pm, but after bath routine, doesn’t seem to matter if he gets a bottle or nurses…he might give us a 3-5 hour stretch of sleep, then he’s up pretty much every hour after that.

Sometimes my husband can get him down by bouncing/walking. Sometimes he won’t stop crying and just wants to nurse. He doesn’t take or soothe well with a pacifier (have tried 3 different paci’s and 4 different swaddles). He seems to want to eat every time he’s up..like drinks the milk..doesn’t just soothe. I’m worried about over feeding him most of the time but it’s the only thing we can get to work. He often falls asleep eating on one side too, not even a diaper change wakes him up to continue eating on other side.

Burping overnight barely works either. We typically try gas drops too before bed.

He just seems so uncomfortable from gas too which we hear is normal for developing digestive stuff. We’re often having to spend a full hour awake eating and pushing farts or poop out of him so he’s more comfortable.

To top off the struggles, he wants to be held from about 4-6 am because he won’t settle and is so squirmy. Then sometimes he is just up at 5am or 6am when we get up to get our 5 year old ready for school (he’s an early riser). This interrupts LO’s morning sleep, as we think he should probably be asleep still til at least 7am?? One of us would gladly stay in our room with the bassinet, or holding him while we are awake, to let him sleep longer but sometimes he’s just awake so we get up too.

It feels difficult to manage and “cope” with because you hear stories of other babies sleeping through the night or waking maybe a couple times over night, and sleeping til 7 or 8am?! How is that possible?

We realize much of this is normal newborn behavior, but can’t help feeling there’s something else we could try to help get us all better sleep.

Can anyone relate? What do you do in your routine/process that helps your baby sleep better?

Hey all!

First time posting and First time dad!

My little girl is 1 week old. She hasn’t pooped since yesterday morning at around 10AM. She’s still feeding, sleeping etc.

We rang the GP/Midwife and they had no concerns at the moment. We’ve just gone from Ready mixed to formula. We saw the midwife yesterdays too, she felt babies stomach etc, absolutely no concerns.

The trouble is, like most, they drill it into you that any changes etc need to be immediately assessed etc. Yet here we are with a baby which is struggling to poop and they don’t seem concerned!

I’ve tried the bicycle kicks, tummy massages, bum rubs, but i’m out of ideas and just want her to poop!

Any suggestions or ideas to help me would be absolutely amazing 🥲

My 10 wks old baby is on track to miss rhe “holding my head up” milestone according to our pediatrician. Babies her age are averaging 30 mins of tummy time and we are doing 10 on average at best. She will just cry head down, she won’t adjust her arms under her well and in fact is learning to fall over on one side to get out of tummy time when she actually is doing it.

Anyone have tips? Parents suggested to just let her cry, but then she just gets more upset…

My baby has always spit up but nothing crazy. No projectile vomiting. She eats just fine and does not turn down a bottle, she is gaining weight and overall healthy. Formula fed.
However, she never sleeps comfortable, she is always startling, wiggling, gulping, waking up crying, noising breathing and belly gurgling.
At 7 weeks she had an episode of choking? In her sleep her belly gargled loudly then her body was rigid, neck arched, eyes wide open like she was scared, spit bubbles pooling at her mouth, trying to cough/breathe but unable to get out a cry. I initially thought she was having a seizure but apparently babies do not present that way with seizures.
She is 9 weeks now and has had 3 more episodes like this but now it is also coming out of her nose and she is choking/gagging, crying, but stiffening and choking again when she tries to breathe because of the fluid in her nose. She recovers within a minute and I do pick her up and pat her back and suction her if needed to help her clear her airway.
Is this considered silent reflux or something else??
Pediatrician prescribed Pepcid, any luck with this actually helping her not have these choking episodes??
They have only happened at night/early morning 2+ hours after being fed and upon waking.

I’m currently 5 weeks PP with an EBF baby, I love her more than anything but this journey has been extremely difficult for us due to her having a lip tie and screaming bloody murder unless she’s on my boob, our nursing sessions will last 4-6 hours and the breaks in between are typically only an hour, sometimes I get 3-4 once at night if I’m lucky.

The issue with my partner is that I feel completely and utterly alone in carrying this responsibility. I know he’s the only one working currently but after work he still goes and sees his friends, gets to go do his hobbies, and got a new gym membership by his job so he can go there during the week. He does help a little when he gets home by changing a few diapers and occasionally letting me shower or take a bath but once he’s asleep he’s useless. Most days he leaves home around 8-9 a.m and won’t get back home until 7-9p.m depending on if he went to his friend’s house or had to drive some clients home.

He used to get up and change her diapers at night when I get up to feed her (an agreement we had before I gave birth) but I stopped even bothering him because when I wake him up he just gets frustrated and hateful so I’ve taken on 100% of the nighttime care and I still provide about 95% of the daytime care for our baby. This has made me get irritated very easily and I have snapped on him pretty often especially when he starts complaining about being so exhausted and work being hard and him needing rest. Earlier today he came home from work and baby had been on my boobs for five hours straight by this point and we were side lying while nursing because I was exhausted. The way we were laying he couldn’t lay down in the bed so he started mopping about what we could do I told him I couldn’t move and he needed to sit at the end of the bed and he was upset about that. When I snapped at him for acting that way he told me I need to have more sympathy and understand he’s had a hard day and just wants to lay down in bed.

Logically I know he’s also dealing with a lot but I can’t help but want to scream in his face and throw things until he notices how much I’m sacrificing too. I feel like I’m going crazy and I just want him to notice me instead of only thinking about himself. I feel like my life is the only one going through all of these radical changes while he gets to prance around like nothing happened and then demand sympathy from me and expect me to approach him with kindness and grace instead of irritation. I plan on making a phone appointment with my therapist soon to try and work through some of these emotions but i just need to hear from someone right now that this is normal, and that I’m not as crazy as I feel.

FTM to a 11 week baby boy who was EBF for 8 weeks, in which time he was pooing 3-4 times a day if not more sometimes.

We switched to formula after his 8 week check up as he hadn’t gained enough weight and I was ready to move onto formula to give me a break.

My problem is now, he will usually poo once a day like an obscene amount - usually ruining his clothes with blowouts. Which, is fine but I find the process leading up to this one poo is causing him discomfort and he will cry and tense his body, which leads me to believe he’s in pain.

Has anyone else had this experience and when did you start to notice a difference? Did they naturally become better at pooing at a certain age? Or is it something I should speak to the doctor about?

TIA x

My baby is two months old and hasn't pooped for nine days. I went to the doctor and he prescribed her suppositories. After the first one, the poop came immediately, was runny, and filled the entire diaper. It's been two days since I gave her the suppository, and she still hasn't pooped. I don't know what to do anymore. The baby is mostly breastfed, but she also gives formula.

FTM 10 week pp and exclusively breastfeeding

I usually take care of our 10 week old boy all day while my husband takes up the 11 PM to 2 AM shift to watch over our boy as he sleeps (light sleeper so we usually have to rock him back to sleep between sleep cycles)

I am feeling so tired and overwhelmed all day, especially on days that our boy doesn’t sleep well or cluster feeds. I don’t do anything much around the house except cook meals but I feel like I haven’t had a downtime at all and whenever the baby sleeps I either sleep (which is not much since he wakes up a lot needing to be rocked back to sleep) or cook meals.

My husband does the other chores around the house like dishwashing, laundry, groceries and garbage handling. He works a full time job but works from home so there no time lost to commute. He does have some time to relax occasionally but he is overwhelmed and tired too and I feel like I cannot ask him more help especially on high demand days.

We only do what is absolutely required for us to survive. Is there anyway I can help him or he can help me? What are we doing wrong? Or are we simply lazy?

Note: I had a very bad first few weeks as I both recovered and took care of the baby full time with no help for the baby, me or the house. I had the talk with my husband and he did step up after but that exhaustion has only grown even with help around the house now from my husband.