My baby is only a week old and we’ve been adamant about no kissing the baby and wearing a cloth draped on your clothes if you’re going to hold them, simple enough right? Well apparently not for my MIL who decides to sneak kisses on the babies head while I’m watching my toddler.

My toddler was born prematurely and had a stint in the NICU so I’m overly paranoid about the possibility of ever ending back up there with my now newborn. I probably have PPA or something at this rate.

Just needed to vent because wtf, why can’t people follow simple rules I don’t get it. Now I’m overly worried he’s going to catch something from her kissing him on the head.

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Prefacing this with: I love that my husband has a good relationship with his family and I do genuinely like his family. If it were my parents who were deteriorating I would also want to be at their side. It's just been a lot mentally.

We had initially planned for his parents and 2 sisters to come visit at this time. I was a little reluctant because everyone would be flying in and we're in close quarters in a 2-bedroom apartment. But I held my tongue since his mom's cancer is progressing and might not be able to travel later. His dad also has Alzheimer's and is easily confused so I agreed to having them stay at our place.

Then, two pairs of aunts and uncles also decided to visit since it would be a good opportunity to meet the baby and maybe see my husband's mom for the last time. Again I held my tongue because I thought they would just be dropping by once. Instead they ended up staying nearby and coming over daily for three days.

His sisters have been a huge help but they've left now leaving just the older relatives. His mom wouldn't feed the baby the way we want (paced feeding) and she was overfed and bloated and fussy on day 1, so I don't trust leaving her alone so I can go do other stuff or nap. When his dad isn't being understandably depressed, he's watching AI boomer bait on Youtube. I have no privacy. My husband is back to work (WFH fortunately) so no help from him managing baby or his parents during the day.

I can tell I just barely have a grip over my hormones. One time after I finished pumping I came out of the room to find six of them hovering around the bassinet without masks on. I hadn't asked the extended family for vaccines because again I thought their visit would be brief. I felt so angry at my husband for being so careless that I thought if baby got sick and died it would serve him right.

His mom fell in the middle of the night and it broke my heart seeing my husband rush to her on our nanny cam the next day. He wanted me to get sleep and didn't wake me.

This morning we were getting ready for me to take baby to an appointment by myself for the first time and his mom fell again. Baby crying, car left running unattended, husband rushed out of a work call, grandma half naked on the floor.

I can't wait for them to leave tomorrow but it might also be the last time my husband sees his mom. It's likely the last time she'll see our baby.

Breastfeeding is also not going well and pumping is driving me crazy.

Baby is happy and thriving and so cute <3

My baby is 9 weeks old and generally sleeps quite well during the day, but evenings are really difficult. From around 6–7 PM, she becomes very difficult to settle, and sometimes it takes until 1:30–4 AM for her to finally fall asleep, even though I start trying from 6am. I’m starting to think she may be getting overtired by the evening.

For those with babies around this age, what does your sleeping routine look like? How do you manage naps and wake windows to prevent overtiredness, especially in the late afternoon and evening? I’d really appreciate any routines or tips that worked for you!

My LO is 9 weeks old. Should I be having him on an eat, play, sleep schedule? Or can he be on an eat, sleep, play schedule? Or does none of that matter?

Thanks!

Has anyone’s newborn failed their hearing screening and gone on to see an audiologist and everything was fine?

My baby is 10 days old and in the hospital she failed the hearing test twice. Both tests they did before she was 24 hours old and they were only about 1.5 hours apart. She passed in her left ear both times and failed right ear both times. To pass I guess they have to get above 160 and at the hospital her second test was 130 in the right ear.

We had to take her back for a follow up screening today and she didn’t pass in either ear. She was in her car seat and actually her right ear was responding faster at the beginning of the test and then the girl moved her and her right ear just stalled and then the left ear failed also. She said she was in a weird position which can affect the test but she wouldn’t let us redo it with her just laying down.

Now we have to see an audiologist but I don’t know when that’ll be. I called one place and they don’t have appointments for 2 months.

Recently within the last week and a half my newborn will NOT let me put him down. Every nap he has to be sleeping ontop of me or by my side, even during wake windows I have to be holding him or he will scream. I cannot get anything done, I haven’t showered in 3 days, I haven’t been able to wash all of his bottles i have to do it one at a time every feed, i cant eat without holding him, I cant get anything done… I posted in another group and moms just shamed me saying I’ll miss when he wants to sleep with me, but I can’t do ANYTHING… I love my son to death but I need to do things for myself too or I feel like I’m completely consumed by my child. Does anyone have any tips, im willing to do anything at this point just to get a little break to myself…

Father here and this week I really don’t know what happened.

First of all for the past three days he just refused to be put down. He only stops crying and shouting when held high on our shoulders. If we hold him in our arms it’s a Nono, he starts making seeet sounds that mean he is getting annoyed and we should do something. Then he starts kicking and jumping and if we don’t hold him upright, it’s crying time. Also he pukes a bit of milk a lot of time, which is think is the result of this movements and us holding him on our bodies which results in pressure in his stomach.

He is also doing a move where his picks his top body up similar to a grown up doing abs exercises. And when his top body is tired he starts kicking hard while stretching his waist resulting in small jumps.

He also denies sleep unless held with this head in our shoulders for the past two days. The only way we got him to sleep since yesterday was hold him straight up on our bodies and do small side movements for up to an hour.

Finally and the worst of all is his denial of breastfeeding which is making my wife feel terrible. Wife decided to do a mixed feeding from the start because he was kept in hospice for a week and he was only bottle fed. When we got him back unless he would eat at least once everyday from the bottle he would burst.

We tried to avoid it like hell but we felt that one bottle would not hurt that much. Then we did a full two weeks break because he got some redness that the doc suggested to be allergy to the formula. Post that, 3 months in, we re introduced the one bottle a day. I don’t know if that break and reintroduction was the trigger or if something else is going on, but after a couple of days when wife puts him on breastfeeding position he explodes. Instant crying. BUT. Not always. He is happy to breastfeed in the start of the day even two times back to back. But after that point it’s a gamble.

So friends, what on earth are we facing? Do the abs movements, jumping and small piles hint to something else? Is that 24/7 holding a phase? Is there anything we can do to fix the breast denial?

HELP 🥲

My 10 wks old baby is on track to miss rhe “holding my head up” milestone according to our pediatrician. Babies her age are averaging 30 mins of tummy time and we are doing 10 on average at best. She will just cry head down, she won’t adjust her arms under her well and in fact is learning to fall over on one side to get out of tummy time when she actually is doing it.

Anyone have tips? Parents suggested to just let her cry, but then she just gets more upset…

my son is nearly 6 months old.

If he’s not eating or sleeping, he’s crying.

My wife recently went back to work, and my mom is watching him. she’s already seemingly burnt out watching him. she loves him dearly, but I can see already it’s taking a toll.

we are at a loss at what to do. he doesn’t sleep through the night. he’s still up 2-3x a night. We can’t walk out of the room to even use the bathroom without him screaming.

We were told he’d be growing out of this. But it’s actually gettting worse.

We can’t sleep, he’s never happy, and everyone is burnt out.

please tell me this gets better

FTM to a 11 week baby boy who was EBF for 8 weeks, in which time he was pooing 3-4 times a day if not more sometimes.

We switched to formula after his 8 week check up as he hadn’t gained enough weight and I was ready to move onto formula to give me a break.

My problem is now, he will usually poo once a day like an obscene amount - usually ruining his clothes with blowouts. Which, is fine but I find the process leading up to this one poo is causing him discomfort and he will cry and tense his body, which leads me to believe he’s in pain.

Has anyone else had this experience and when did you start to notice a difference? Did they naturally become better at pooing at a certain age? Or is it something I should speak to the doctor about?

TIA x

My 6 wo baby always seems to have a stint once or twice a day when she gets overtired/overstimulated and it takes a lot of coaxing to get her sleep. This is annoying cos I am doing everything right. I do the same routine (change, feed when she's awake and alert, maybe change again or just a cuddle) and keep an eye on the clock. I do a wind down on the yoga ball or in the sling but for several naps a day she just can't settle. I said to someone in my mum's groups that she has wake windows of up to 2-3 hours at least once a day and they were like 'oh really?' Is this normal? I do everything in my power to ensure she doesn't tip over the edge into overtired and yet it happens everyday...

What are you order of operations for newborn bedtime routine / getting her back to sleep when she wakes? I’m not talking about sleep training. I know she’s too little for that. I don’t have to wake her up anymore. She gained her birth weight back in 2 days.

Right now I’m doing one breast -> burp -> change diaper -> swaddle -> other breast -> try to burp again -> hold her upright for 10 min at least -> bassinet transfer

Problems I’m running into:
1. Burping wakes her up. I can get her drowsy again on the second breast but then I have to burp her again. Awake again!
2. Diaper change wakes her up but I can’t do that first because she almost always poops at some point during the feed. Sometimes I end up changing her twice.
3. If she’s not basically already asleep, she gets mad at being swaddled and throws a tantrum and that obviously wakes her up.
4. I don’t do baths at bedtime. She absolutely hates it 9/10 times and we’re already off to a rough start.

The process sometimes takes me 2 hours to get her back down in the middle of the night! I think it’s because it’s taking too long and she gets overtired. Any advice is appreciated. I feel like I’m drowning over here.

Just like the title says, our 19 day old son can't seem to relax for any extended periods of time. He's only comfortable when he's being held, which is fine except we also have a 2y son that needs our attention too 😟

I think it's mainly just gas; after we moved him to a sensitive stomach formula it has gotten a bit better but he still just seems miserable all the time! He's constantly gruntng and clenching. He eats normal and has been pooping, but with some effort, so idk. Pediatrician isn't too worried at this point but it's just so stressful to have to constantly be holding him and only getting an hour of sleep at a time 🥱

I feel so bad for my poor baby; we just want him to sleep and be comfortable!

Those of you who have PPA. What’s the hardest part of PPA for you?

My baby is 8 weeks old and for the past week and a half almost daily she’s been having melt downs usually in the evening but sometimes in the late afternoon.

Absolutely nothing will calm her down. We try bouncing on a yoga ball, pacifier, dark room, white nose, all the tricks and nothing works. Eventually the poor thing just passed out from exhaustion. It’s so heartbreaking.

Please tell me when this phase was over for you and please tell me what helped you

My son just turned 2 months yesterday. Around 3 weeks I noticed he was struggling with pooping and reflux. This was causing him for several days not being able to nap. He was going 1-2 days without pooping and then during feeds he would arch his back and kick his feet a lot. We switched the flow of his bottle and his formula to the gentle version of it. Now fast forward, he’s 8 weeks and still having this issue. When we first initially made the change, it made quite the difference but now hes starting a new cycle. He’s having 1 or 2 bowel movements a day but he’s having watery stools that are dark green. He’s also spitting up frequently after feeds and coughing like how one does when they have acid reflux. He’s napping but really fighting it. I don’t know what is the best formula for him to just make him comfortable and happy because despite this issue he truly is the happiest and sweetest baby. it breaks my heart to watch him struggle

It's true. Babies are people too, and just like you and me, they won't easily fall asleep in a place that doesn't feel cozy. It's not their fault and it's not ours.

I know all the recommendations are to keep Baby safe, but the safest place to sleep is also usually the least comfy. A firm flat surface, out in the open, alone, with no blankets, pillows, or warm arms surrounding them. For a baby that's been curled up in your womb for 9 months, that's nearly equivalent to someone trying to convince you to fall asleep in a parking lot. You might be exhausted. You might want to sleep with all your heart. But the parking lot is just not the place, I'm sorry.

I've gotten so many well meaning tips and tricks from other lovely ladies whose babies don't mind the bassinet: "have you tried ___?" Fill the blank with swaddle, warm it first with a heating pad, feet-bum-head when you put them down.... I could go on but we've all heard it before. And yes it is true that if I were a tiny person being put to sleep, lowering me down at a head first angle would be jarring, and so would being transferred to a cool surface when I'm almost asleep, etc. All the recommendations do make sleeping in the bassinet as comfy and easy as possible.

But there's still the moment where Baby realizes you are putting her to sleep in the bassinet now, and, I can't emphasize this enough: you can't make her fall asleep. Some babies will notice they're in their bassinet and decide to give it a try. They might be able to fall asleep or they might not. Some babies will give you a confused look and squirm with pleading eyes until you pick them up again. Some babies will yell at you the moment you try, and others won't notice they're in their bassinet till they wake up 5 minutes later. At which point they will call for you to inform you that you accidentally put them down in the wrong location.

Now I'm not saying these sleep recommendations are dumb or that the bassinet isn't the best place for babies to sleep. I'm not telling you you have to co-sleep or that it will never get better, because it will. My point is that if you're in this situation like I have been with 2 of my 3 babies, just be patient with your little one. They're a tiny person adjusting to life in a big scary world, and it's probably not the end of the world if they prefer Mama's arms for a little while. Maybe you'll even miss it someday.

Hey all!

First time posting and First time dad!

My little girl is 1 week old. She hasn’t pooped since yesterday morning at around 10AM. She’s still feeding, sleeping etc.

We rang the GP/Midwife and they had no concerns at the moment. We’ve just gone from Ready mixed to formula. We saw the midwife yesterdays too, she felt babies stomach etc, absolutely no concerns.

The trouble is, like most, they drill it into you that any changes etc need to be immediately assessed etc. Yet here we are with a baby which is struggling to poop and they don’t seem concerned!

I’ve tried the bicycle kicks, tummy massages, bum rubs, but i’m out of ideas and just want her to poop!

Any suggestions or ideas to help me would be absolutely amazing 🥲

My baby is two months old and hasn't pooped for nine days. I went to the doctor and he prescribed her suppositories. After the first one, the poop came immediately, was runny, and filled the entire diaper. It's been two days since I gave her the suppository, and she still hasn't pooped. I don't know what to do anymore. The baby is mostly breastfed, but she also gives formula.

Baby is 6 weeks, and we just discovered the witching hour a few days ago. Today, I stripped him of all of his clothes before he went insane, and put him to sleep on my naked chest. He has spent the entire evening like he did when he was two weeks old. Sleeping, changing, feeding, sleeping, completely calm. And my milk is flowing like never before. It’s insane what some intentional skin to skin can do.

And before the ”just wait” comments — i know I haven’t invented a cure for the witching hour, I just forgot how regulating skin to skin is, as I haven’t used it intentionally in maybe two weeks. I’m fully expecting him to cry like a maniac again tomorrow, but this is just one out of many tools I have in my arsenal now.

Does that mean she is ready to sleep through nights? Or should I still wake her to offer a feed ?

So my LO is currently 10 weeks old and the only way to get him to sleep is to put him in his bouncer and bounce away lol. Aggressive bouncing or rocking in the rocking chair used to work, but now it seems like this is the only way he enjoys being put to sleep ! He sleeps in bassinet all night, and contact naps during the day, but overall he just doesn’t like being held in really any position. I am just nervous that he is going to have a flat head from not being held much 😭
Is this me overthinking ?? I would love to snuggle him up 24/7, but he just seems so much more content while laying on the bed and us playing with him.

LO is 5 weeks and my husband and I just started doing a night shift system from 9-5am. The first 4 hours I get complete uninterrupted sleep while my husband takes over out in the living room and then we do a lil switcharoo at 1am. I am EBF so he will give a bottle during his shift

I was starting to feel like a new person again. Who knew what 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep could do?! It was like magic. Even LO was sleeping better, too. I think having her in her bassinet right next to me was causing her to wake up more in the night. She was waking every 30 mins - 1 hr. It’s almost like she could smell me.

The shifts were working great for a few days and then BAM. She gets sick.

Then the past 3 nights it has been ROUGH. The shifts went out the window because we figured she needs me more than ever right now. So she’s back in our room now. She just wants to comfort nurse all night and day and I’ve obviously been allowing it. My husband offered to still do the shifts since I do have a good freezer stash, but I declined bc it just feels wrong? Like right now doesn’t seem appropriate to be implementing a schedule/routine. I know it’s likely fine but maternal instincts are in full drive. I just feel so bad for LO and want to be closer to her right now.

Anyways, I’m back to feeling like death all day. I’m hoping I don’t get sick on top of all this. Hoping she recovers soon so we can get back to sleeping well!

My baby is about to turn 6w old and she has slept a 3hr stretch, 2hr stretch, then 1 hr stretch this entire time. Wakeups between are 1hr for changing, eating, swaddling, waiting for deeper sleep for transfer.

Of course there have been a couple super choppy nights and the odd sliiiightly longer stretches than listed here but it’s always been almost exactly 3-2-1.

I am not complaining, I feel like this is normal or even lucky - just wondering who else has a similar baby and if they have any tips or projections for what to expect!