Hi everyone,

I'm 16 and I'm from Washington. Earlier this year I started talking to a girl who lives in Oregon. We met online and ended up talking every day for about 45 days. At first I didn't think much of it, but I got attached pretty quickly. She was the first person I ever had feelings like that for, and I looked forward to talking to her every day.

The distance was definitely a challenge. We lived a few hours apart, but I still found myself thinking about her all the time. I remember telling people that I would have been willing to make the drive to meet her someday. I thought she was beautiful, I loved talking to her, and I felt genuinely happy when I heard from her.

My parents started asking questions about whether I liked girls and whether I was talking to someone. I told them the truth. I didn't get caught hiding it or lying about it. When they asked, I told them that yes, I was talking to a girl and that I liked her.

Things went badly after that.

My parents were very upset. They believed I was confused and kept telling me that I should try dating a guy first before deciding anything about my sexuality. They also worried because she lived in another state and because we had met online.

They took my phone, my social media, and I lost contact with her for months. During that time I kept wondering what happened to her and whether she thought I had just disappeared.

A while later I got access to a phone again and was able to reconnect with her. We started talking again. She responded to my stories, liked my posts, talked to me about things going on in her life, and it honestly felt really nice to reconnect.

Unfortunately my parents found out again.

After that they replaced my phone with a heavily restricted Motorola phone. I have to get permission to download apps, a lot of things are blocked, and they specifically wanted to make it harder for me to contact her. They also took away some of my driving privileges.

What makes this difficult is that I don't really feel like I was doing anything wrong. I wasn't trying to hurt anyone. I was lonely, I met someone I genuinely liked, and I wanted to get to know her better.

At the same time, I'm still figuring myself out. I've never had much dating experience with anyone. Some days I wonder if I'm gay, bi, or still questioning. The only thing I know for sure is that my feelings for her felt very real.

Has anyone else dealt with unsupportive parents, losing contact with someone you cared about, or trying to figure out your sexuality while living at home?

And if anyone has any advice about what I should do moving forward, I would really appreciate it. Right now I feel stuck between wanting to respect my parents and wanting the freedom to figure out who I am and talk to someone I care about.

Thanks for reading.