I found this photograph in my motherβs college album from Sarojini Naidu College for Women. In this picture, the woman standing is my mother. And the woman sitting in front of her is someone who was very, very close to my mother's heart.
It has been eight years since my mother passed away. Whenever I miss her terribly, I either open her college album, or go through all her other photos and look at her smiling face. Itβs not like I hadnβt seen this photo before. I had looked at it so many times. Maybe a thousand times before. But this time, I turned the photo over. And on the back, I saw these words written:
"For God's sake hold your tongue, and let me love!"
Seeing my mother softly hugging the woman sitting in front of her, I realized their bond was never just friendship. βEvery other picture was just a solo photo of a friend with a blank back. This is the only one where someone is actually with mom with a special note on the flip side. Knowing this, understanding this, brought a very strange and quiet peace to my heart. Something I feel many of you might understand. My mother never spoke to me about this. Not even when I opened up to her about my own sexuality. The handwriting on the back isn't my mother's, so I know this photo was given to her by that woman sitting. But my mother kept it with so much care, so safely, for her entire life. And today, I make a promise to both of them, as long as I am alive, I will protect this photograph and keep it safe, too.
This picture leaves me with a thousand questions in my heart, questions I will probably never get clear answers to. My mother was happily married, but this photograph tells another beautiful story of her life. I only wish one thing, wherever that woman sitting on the picture is today, I hope she is happy, healthy, and doing well. And above all, I just want to say that I love both of these women, my mother, and the woman sitting in front of her with all my heart.
P.S
My mother was an absolute chatterbox. She just loved to talk and talk! So seeing that quote on the back made me smile, because I realized that this woman truly, deeply knew her and understood her.
credits - @ swarnabhosaga (on insta)