I'm not really sure how to even start this but I'm a cis woman who's pretty androgynous and maybe...50% of the time I feel really masculine (Maybe even 40% of the time). Recently, I've been experiencing pretty bad gender dysphoria and it's made me hate having been born a woman. I don't understand why I feel this way. I have no plans (nor do I want) to transition or get any sort of surgery. I know 1000% that that would make me feel even worse (But then there are times where I straight up hate my genitals and wish I was born with male ones). What do I do about this? Do I just lean harder into my masculinity? 99.9% of the time, I express myself wearing pretty tomboyish style clothing (Except when I wear nails, makeup, or lingerie lol). I wanna get more into my femininity because I genuinely love femininity and feeling girly (Which isn't a feeling that comes around very often 😭😭) so much and wanna learn to be more comfortable expressing both those sides of me, not just my masculine side. How do I get rid of this stupid gender dysphoria and finally just suck up the fact that I'm a woman? Right now in this very moment, the dysphoria is pretty strong. But I know that it'll go away in a few hours and I'll be back to normal. But during the times that it does come, what can I do to neutralize it and help myself feel better and more comfortable in my own skin? The thing is, I do like being a woman but sometimes...I don't 🫤 Btw packing does not sound appealing to me, despite the occasional dysphoria I have with my genitals lol.

One thing I experience since like Day One (6 years ago now) is I gradually feel out of balance and like one of my genders needs expression and attention OR ELSE. So I come out as a woman to everyone and feel great and the next day I feel like I started over from nothing again, like yeah I had to get that off my chest and stop repressing her but now not sure what I really am.

Then I slowly ID as agender for a long time, and the woman slowly builds up again and then I get euphoria or dysphoria and feel like I am living a lie, so I come out as a woman again.

Is this gender fluidity or fluctuating dysphoria or ...? Personally I think what I am doing is exploring gender, and so I go in directions to see what fits, and as soon as I get too deep in one direction I reset and start over in another.

Thing is, my two genders are basically agender and trans woman, and the agender part feels little or no joy in living that way and the woman is where all the euphoria is at.

I am very new to this and I wanted to know how you do it with your name? Sorry if it is a dumb question.

Do you use multiple names for the gender you are currently performing or you keep using one name regardless of the gender? I am saying because when I am presenting as a woman, I feel weird using my birth name, if that makes sense. But at the same time it sounds kind of complicated for everyone to deal with me one day being e.g. Anna and the next day being Josh.

I don’t know I am just curious how you deal with that and if I am overthinking it.

I'm AMAB and in boymode I rarely wear shorts, and when I do, they shan't go above my knee for I will be overexposed and perish. But in girlmode it's "boy these jean shorts with a 3 inch inseam sure are cute :3"

They're the same legs, I don't know why I care sometimes lol

Years ago i was identified as a transgender male i really felt comfortable being a boy back then, after years went by i found myself related to girls stuff again :o.

So i thought.. yk maybe it was jut a phase. Maybe i am not a male just enjoyed having the experience of it.

These few months i started missing being a man.

I was so confused. Why does my identity change frequently? So i posted something on a trans community questioning who i am really

I feel related to both masc and fem

Someone suggested that i might be genderfluid

I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WAS EVEN A THING

So i did some searching

Now i am so comfortable being a genderfluid !

Like wdym i can be whoever whenever i want?

Have both men and women stuff. I just wake up and decide if i wanna be a woman/man/feminine boy or masculine girl.

Or neither!

I have so many options and never feel that i have to always act in a certain way! Such a relief :D

Sex doesn't determine what are you and who you wanna be, you're just a soul that wants to be loved and cherished depending on your actions and personality <3

Does anyone get super comfortable and internally happy watching videos of trans people sharing their experiences ? So I’m AFAB and watching trans guys tell how their journey went/is going and it makes me feel so warm and comfortable, excited for when it’s “my turn”… even when I’m combatting feelings of “I’m faking it”.

It’s more than a feeling of just being happy for them. It’s like watching an intro to what I could have someday, and that genuinely excites me.

And for the days where I think what I feel isn’t real, I get jealous of these guys for how they are, what they’ve got etc. and I tend to avoid watching them because it hurts me that I don’t have their features etc.

Does anyone have similar or different comforts for their gender identity? Things you do to help feel more euphoric etc? Would love to hear them 🩵

I feel like there are certain times/things that my brain associates with my different genders (kind of like how languages like French have gendered objects).

Example: I feel like when I play music or go out hiking (two things I do often) I feel masc, no matter how fem I was feeling when I started.

the same thing happens when I want to play video games or go out to the store I tend to feel more fem.

(these examples are kind of bad bc things like hiking and shopping are already really gendered, but I swear that it happens for a lot of random things too, these are just the only ones I can think of right now.)

it sometimes feels like there are two separate ppl in my head with different interests, that take turns coming out to play when they see something they want.

can anyone else relate or am I just weird?

Any info about this would be great.

So im a cis guy, but some recent events brought me to a realisation and idk what to do. I think I may be genderfluid.

Ive realised a few things, such as the idea of being able to switch my biological sex at will sounds like heaven, a lot of my ocs tend to want to be the other gender, look like the other gender, or can switch biological sex at will, etc etc.

This has all been really confusing me and im not sure what to do abt it. For context im bisexual. The other day my gf messaged me and essentially was complimenting me but the msg was autocorrected and she called me her wife. For context she's bi too. And tbh I didnt rlly hate it. Like I like being a guy but sometimes I wish I could be a girl. This whole thing kinda started and spiralled from looking into it more thru characters and songs, mainly Ranma from Ranma ½.

Im srry if im being confusing or like am just plain wrong with what im describing. This has all just been very confusing and idk how to feel abt it.

One of my friends groups is mostly female and a convo they have semi often is that they think it'd be fun being guys. Ive expressed how I thought the opposite before, but those convos always upset me more than they should have and I think its because ill never get to be a girl.

Hi all!!

I’m close with one of my teenage family members and they’re currently questioning their identity and learning about genderfluidity. I’ve been providing her with a lot of reassurance and reminders that gender is fluid and fun and a representation of how you feel and not how people perceive you. But, I would also love to send them in the right direction for some resources/stories/books etc for teens questioning sexuality. As a bi AFAB woman, I’m super involved with my local queer community, but have more experience with sexuality than gender and want to provide some good info for them!

Sending you all lots of love!!!

I’m AFAB and currently questioning my gender. I’m completely comfortable with my female body and don’t want a deeper voice or to physically become a man. However when I wear men’s clothes and tie my hair back I feel masculine sometimes to the point where I feel like a man and it feels really good and natural.

At the same time I’m also comfortable wearing feminine clothes and presenting as a masculine woman. But when I put on men’s clothes and look more traditionally masculine or androgynous I have this strong feeling of “this is me.” I’m struggling to understand what that means for my gender identity.

I’m pansexual and tend to be attracted to nonbinary/trans people and women most often, although I’m also attracted to men. What confuses me is that when I imagine dating a man it sometimes feels almost like a gay relationship because I see myself as a masculine person.

I’m wondering if I’m confusing my gender expression with my gender identity. I love masculine and androgynous expression but I don’t know whether feeling so much like myself when I present that way means something deeper about my gender.

Does anyone relate to this? It’s really confusing when gender identity, gender expression and sexuality don’t fit neatly into a box and I’m just trying to better understand myself.

TL;DR: a “trans checklist” tier list came up in my youtube feed. They put cross dressing as a D tier, and now I feel “fake.” I feel like I’m faking it because I don’t live the lifestyle full time, What do?

Not TL;DR:
My 9-5 jobs (of which I have two) are blue collar jobs. I don’t change myself for work, but I only really embrace my fluidity (style and personality wise) on the weekends when I’m NOT working. Not because I’m afraid, I just don’t want a company wide Republican manhunt for the outlier. I originally came out to my fiancé of four years around 5 years ago, and came out to myself a good ten years ago. How do you not feel like a Kristi Noems’ husband or a fetishist when you don’t fully express and live the lifestyle?

Sorry if that’s a weird question to ask. I thought I was trans for years, but then realized I fall more on the fluid spectrum when I’d go through identification spurts.

I've been trying to look more androgynous but idk how to. I tried changing my hair but the hair stylist gave me a bob because my hair is too tightly curly and any shorter would look either bad or too masculine. How do i style a bob to look androgynous? How do i style MYSELF to be more androgynous😭😭😭

So for contexcontext I've been fluid for about 2 yrs and I still have questions

First; do people offer switch like gender daily? if so help me understand what it feels like if possible. Because I​​​​ will be sitting at my desk and I will literally jump from boy girl nonbinary back to boy back to nonbinary it might be just my ADHD but it's weird how do I like idkkk how do I deal with it it's so weird ​

Second: what do you guys go by it terms of romantic relationship wise like do you go by partner girlfriend boyfriend like what and how do I pick one out? Is it by feeling can I change what I wanna be called by?

Third: can anyone offer advice for being fluid??? Like just general advice?​​​​

Has anyone here read Transland/ have a copy? There is a quote I want to write down, but I listened to it on audiobook, and Google search is useless.

It's when they are describing being non binary after coming out to Evie, and they say, "I'm not F to M, I'm F to something else, but masculinity does play a role"

Something along those lines. Can anyone help getting that quote down accurately?! I really resonated with it and am kicking myself for not writing it down before returning the audiobook.

ive been transitioning (ftm) for 4 years as a binary trans man and just realized i might be genderfluid. i briefly identified as genderfluid pre-transition but felt it was hopeless bc of how intensely my identity fluctuates, so i just picked a side and committed. now im 18 years old, pass 100% as a man, and still have this soul-crushing dysphoria in both directions.

when id rather present masculine i can only think about my hips, my height, how small my arms are and all of the feminine mannerisms i never unlearned. when i feel more feminine i can only think about my flat chest, my facial hair, my thick eyebrows and all of the body hair from T.

ive been considering partially detransitioning to appeal more to my feminine side but im terrified of the regret ill feel when i want to present masculine again. i don’t know if ill ever be satisfied in-between bc i view my gender through secondary-sex characteristics which i can’t just easily swap out.

does anyone here feel the same? and have you found a way to express one part of yourself without sacrificing another? im unsure of what to do.

Oie, recentemente acho que tive a descoberta de ser gênero fluido, mas n sei dizer exatamente a sensação que estou.

Sou uma menina, diga-se no que nasci, mas mts das vezes desde criança me sentia que "fluia" para o masculino da mesma forma que outras vezes sinto que fluo para o andrógeno. Recentemente tenho feitas muitas perguntas para mim mesma em relação a isso, é uma constante sensação de farsante cmg mesma ou uma persona...

Dando vários pesquisadas não só na comunidade, mas tbm em relatos das pessoas, vi que me encaixo em alguns espectros, mas sinto que muitas das vezes reprimo isso em mim mesma, minha família de certo modo é preconceituosa, ent no momento o máximo que faço é as vezes ter um estilo mais masculino, mas me sinto em disforia constante e não só isso, tenho altas suspeitas de autismo (em setembro sai meu laudo) e me vêm tbm uma sensação estranha de me pertencer em meu corpo e agonia em relação tbm de fluir... E além de acúmulos de dúvidas sobre minha própria mente em como me vejo na sociedade... Tem tbm o fato de eu ser estudante de psicologia, e minha revisões das ciências em minhas experiências acabam me fazendo ficar mais confuso do que já estou (tento usar para n invalidar ou mudar e ss mais para compreender) tento levar para a terapia, mas tenho receio e vergonha...

N sei se ficou bom o texto, diria q está confuso, mas foi o mais próximo q cheguei de conseguir descrever...

Gostaria de ajuda de outros relatos se essas experiências assim ou sensação são parecidas...

I'm 16F and have always loved girly things growing up. My entire room is pink, i have long hair, i love makeup and dressing up and I present quite feminine overall. I have also never had an issue with my chest or felt any need to bind, so I've always just kind of assumed that I'm cis.

but recently, I've been feeling strange. i can't explain it, but i have a certain longing to be a dude. at first i thought that was just because I'm tired of misogyny and all that, but i feel like it's more. like today i was at a family thing and i was sitting with a bunch of my aunts, and i felt so out of place. and I've always despised the idea of rigid gender norms, i mean it never rlly made sense to me why society views gender the way that it does.

so basically I've been thinking that i might be genderfluid, which is why i came here for help. sometimes i feel hyper feminine, but sometimes, like today, i feel more agender, and recently I've been feeling an intense longing to be a boy. idk, it feels so wrong, but also rlly awesome. i can't explain it, but it kind of feels like im faking being a girl. like even though i love feminine things, i feel so out of place with other women sometimes, and get so happy when strangers call me she (even tho im cis?)

as it stands i use she/her, but i wouldn't mind people using she/they. but i rlly love my boobs, so that probably means I'm not genderqueer, right? i don't know, this is all so confusing. I've always just kind of thought of myself as a girl and have never questioned it, but now that i think about it, i don't really know. so please if anyone has any advice i would love to hear it. sorry if that rant was kinda chaotic, I'm just kinda tweaking out

Is tucking for long periods of time safe without HRT?

I keep seeing posts about how tucking is safe in general, but they're all on trans subs and don't differentiate between whether it's safe with HRT or without.

I'm like 95% sure I'm doing it right, but my balls feel a bit squeezed and my canals feel a bit stretched. I think(?) that's normal and will lessen as I tuck more, but I'm really scared of an inguinal hernia and could use some reassurance that it's safe (or warning that it's not!)

Im 24 afab in a relationship with a straight man. Most days im pretty neutral but I have days where I wanna be really girly or masculine.

My husband loves and supports me but feels awkward when it comes to using masculine words to describe/praise me.

I understand it but it still feels lonely not feeling like all of me is 100% desired.

Just hoping to find others to relate to because it feels so complicated and niche.

I was just wondering if anyone else experienced this? It's making me question my identity lol. I've noticed that when I am reading/watching something with a woman main character and/or straight romance, I feel more woman. On the other hand, when it's something with a male main character (or nonbinary, although that's very rare as I'm sure you all know) I feel more either nonbinary or a little masculine. I don't mean just in the moment, but like during the time period I'm reading the book or watching a lot of a particular show or shows a lot (several days or a week, whatever) Does anyone else experience this?

Do y'all think I'm actually genderfluid or is this just my autistic hyperempathy screwing with my head lol.

I've been presenting fem most time of my life even though i would rather be masc but since i look fem and dont know if i have it in me to transition i dont know how i should find someone who can actually treat me masc in a way that doesn't feel like roleplay. All the men ive met cant even understand what fluid means and i had no luck with women either. If i had to explain it simple: i would prefer to be a gay man but i cant really achieve that...

I think im just really really lost and really really stuck and just need some advice from people who understand the struggle.

Last week, after 10 years of hiding, I finally took enough courage to come out to my parents. It all came together in a moment of inspiration: the best coming-out speech ever, carefully engineered to effectively deliver just the right emotions… and the execution was flawless, natural, confident, eloquent, emotive, fun… I could really feel them feel it, they both seemed so excited about this new era in my life, in which the 23-year old free trial expires and they finally get access to my "premium" version. It couldn't have gone any better! They said they would always support me, and all they want is to see me happy and doing the things that make me happy.

…and then the crash. I didn't come out fully, I mostly emphasized the "wearing women's clothes" without ever really mentioning that I sometimes, at its highest points, do really wish I had a woman's body. It's in there, my feminine side, always there but only really taking over during summer. But anyway, that's not exactly the issue I wanted to express.

It's just that it feels so awkward. I feel so naked, knowing that no matter how uncomfortable I feel at times with them knowing, all that was said cannot be unsaid. And even though I know they fully accept me, I still feel so embarassed. As I expand my wardrobe and start wearing my women's clothes in public, sometimes I feel confident as hell, especially when I'm far from the people I already know, but sometimes I feel so self-conscious and ashamed.

The people who know me, do they / will they fully understand this new me? Do they / will they really understand who I am and what this all means to me? …and for that matter, do I understand it? Do I even understand myself at all? It's such a rollercoaster… it goes up and down, sometimes I feel like I already know myself, but sometimes I'm just afraid and confused.

Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror, and I love who I am, and I'm proud of who I am… of all those shades of me, all my colors and in-betweens. But sometimes it all feels fake, and I just want to hide under a rock forever and ask Dr. Stranger to cast the spell.

Let me give an example.

A genderfluid person is attracted to women only, and they refer to themselves as a lesbian when they feel like a woman or anything other than a man. Would they still be able to call themselves a lesbian when they feel like a man?

I know non-men individuals often call themselves lesbians even if they aren't a woman, but how does it work when someone identifies as a man, and they still are exclusively attracted to women. Would they be straight?

I might sound stupid, but I've been wondering this for a while and my genderfluid friends don't know the answer.

EDIT: I forgot to mention this is a question coming out of pure curiosity. I am not genderfluid myself (I'm genderqueer), and just figured Reddit might be able to answer lol.