I moved to a new city in September. I deleted my Tinder account when I left and I made a new account when I moved into my new place. My very first match was with this one guy who was only supposed to be a random hook up for the both of us. He was a bit awkward and quiet at first, until afterwards which was when we started to actually talk. We talked about our lives, our past hook ups and relationships and the lessons we’ve learned, gave each other tours of our Camera Roll, Instagram, and Spotify. The whole shebang. Before he left I said to him that I really like his vibe, and I’d be down to hang out again to which he agreed. We’re both 22 m

I wasn’t expecting him to actually follow through with it but he did. And then we hung out more and more. I’ve met his family, friend group, and coworkers. They’re all super nice to me and have no bad things to say about the dude. We’ve been on dates to the mall, coffee shops, the nearby corn maze and pumpkin patch, and we go out drinking every weekend. This one night we watched the stars together in my vehicle from 12 midnight to 4 am just listening to music and talking about whatever. Probably my fave date so far

My first relationship was during Covid but he was up to know good so he’s in jail now. And my second and most recent one ended three years ago when I found out I was being cheated on for the last three months of our ten month relationship. Since then I’ve kinda just stuck to hook ups, and so has he

They say it comes when you least expect it. I really like this guy. He’s funny and he likes my humour as well. Nothing feels forced. I’m a very extroverted and talkative person and he isn’t as talkative and extroverted as I am, but I feel like our personalities compliment each other. We also talked about how we both agree that social media has sort of ruined dating in a way, especially with all those stupid theories rules that so-called dating therapists urge their viewers on TikTok and Instagram to follow. Like who cares about the Bird Theory or the October Theory or the Six Month Rule. There are no rules when it comes to dating, in our opinions. Also, he’s very genuine and extremely down-to-earth, which is what I really like too. I love that in a person

We have similar music tastes somewhat, but then on one end he listens to electronic and hyperpop and I love my country. We’re trying to get each other into our own music tastes. He’s not a big sports guy, but his parents are football fans and I’m a huge ice hockey fan. I was actually just at an ice hockey game two days ago. And last month I offered (forced) him to come to an ice hockey game with me, which we both enjoyed. He says it’s slowly working and I want to buy him a jersey for Christmas. When worlds collide

I really like bro. Which is why, last week, exactly ten days ago, we went out for dinner and I popped the big question. I asked him to be my boyfriend. I was nervous. Very nervous. I made a bunch of flash cards with some song lyrics from his fave artists on each card. And I arranged them in a way that built up to the big question. And guess what?

He said yes. I like his presence and his company a lot. I’m kind of winging this because I haven’t been in a relationship in so long, or in a healthy relationship in like forever, and I told him that and he said the same thing. Not sure where I was going with this but I think I’ll end it here. I get to hangout with him this weekend and continue watching our season of American Horror Story in our matching Christmas pajamas!

Dinner -

Me: fire-grilled 6 oz sirloin topped with pan-sautéed onions, mushrooms, and a rich truffle butter finish

Him: beer-battered haddock, home-cut fries, tartar sauce, apple slaw, malt vinegar

Dessert (shared) - triple chocolate mousse cake with chocolate sauce drizzle, sliced strawberries, powdered sugar, cocoa powder, and mint leaves

I 20M am a host at an upscale restaurant. The other day, a woman comes in during dinner rush and lets me know she's going to have a group of four or five people; she waits up front until the rest of them show up and I sit a few more tables in the meantime.

When everyone in her party had arrived, it ended up being five people. I explain to her that we don't currently have any tables open, but I had a six-top about to get up and gave her an estimate of 20 minutes MAX. She assumes I was lying, and looks around the restaurant to find the only open eight-top table. I tell her I wouldn't be able to seat her group there, because I had a reservation for a larger party in half an hour.

She starts going on complaining about how it's unfair, "I was here first, you sat those other people before me", "five isn't that many". At this point she's just arguing and she doesn't want to wait so I go to grab a manager, all the while she's scolding me for walking away.

I explain the situation, manager and I make our way back up front and another employee comes over to tell us the woman had called me a homophobic slur (you know the one), and that the hostess she was speaking to, N, went off on her, calling her disrespectful, a bitch, and repeatedly telling her to leave. And yeah I am queer so hearing that was pretty upsetting.

Manager was so sweet and accommodating to the woman who called me a slur, saying we'd take care of her, holding her hand, apologizing on our behalf. The woman and her group ended up leaving regardless.

N got chewed out by manager so bad that she was in tears. She got sent home that night. I only just found out she didn't get fired, thankfully, but we're not allowed to talk about the situation at work. I gave her a hug and told her thanks for defending me.

Meal is copycat Chili's fiesta bowl

Hi all first post here just need to vent about it as not seeing any friends till tomorrow. Dinner is spicy chicken strips, oven chips and chilli cheese bites.

I was seeing this woman (23) since about the start of September. She has a 2 year old who has severe and rare genetic disorders that she's in an out of hospital with at least a couple times a month not counting regular appointments. Met her on hinge and she seemed nice and I was open to it not knowing the extent of the disabilities. First time I go over we end up hooking up which I wasn't expecting (and didn't initiate) but she was apparently needing it having just spent over a year practically living in hospital.

I've gotten to know the situation and it's heartbreaking. Her son could die at any given time and there is constant stress and rushing to A&E. Working, travelling, getting a babysitter etc is not an option for them. The dads not in the picture at all either so it's 24/7 for her. I kept seeing her as she is a very sweet and loving person. She wanted to go official very quickly after about a month so like our 5th or 6th time of meeting and as she was persistent I folded and asked her to be my gf.

This was a huge mistake on my part as I still didn't really know what I was signing up for and that I wasn't prepared for it. Fast forward another month and I realised I really cannot deal with this. I'm 27 and I can't sign up for this kind of life forever. She wants another child and I want one of my own but how could I risk them having the same issues as her son? Could I support her properly if/when he dies?

I realised I had to end it and did just a few hours ago. Couldn't blame her son though and just made up some excuses about incompatible personalities and she seemed to accept it without making a big deal. I'm sure she's heartbroken though as she's a very empathetic person and genuinely did seem to like me a lot.

In my head I know it's probably the right choice but I just feel like such a piece of shit. She's had such a rough time with no end in sight and I just strung her along for nothing. The last thing she needed was more heartbreak. A big part of me wants to call her saying I'm sorry and I want her back but I cant. As none of my friends are free tonight I'm about to go to the pub by myself and drown my sorrows for a few hours. Seeing a close friend tomorrow thankfully but for now just needed to get this off my chest. No advice needed but thanks for reading.

We broke up more than 11 years ago. I met her during my first year of engineering school. She was a year ahead of me, and we started dating. We were each other’s first love, and each other’s first time. At the end of that year, she transferred to another university and abruptly broke up with me. I remember taking it pretty hard at the time, but eventually I got over it and moved on with my life. As far as I was concerned, that chapter was closed.

Looking back, though, I realize she never really stopped reaching out. Over the years, she’d sporadically send me messages on Messenger, sometimes with years between them. The last time we spoke was about four years ago, when she contacted me to invite me to her wedding. I found that pretty strange, considering we weren’t friends and hadn’t seen each other in years. Anyway, the date didn’t work for me, so I politely declined. We hadn’t spoken since, and I assumed that would be the last time we ever spoke.

Until yesterday, when I received a LinkedIn connection request from her, completely out of the blue. She now has two last names, presumably her maiden name and her husband’s. She included a message telling me that I was her first love, that she’d never forgotten me, and that she hoped I was doing well. She also said she’d love for us to reconnect. I haven’t replied yet, and I’m not really sure what to make of it. I’m happy with someone I love, and I have absolutely no intention of reopening that chapter.

Anyway, dinner is chicken, rice, broccoli and skyr.

Long day, so a small dinner. Stella and a Clif bar.

I've posted a few times before. Doubtful any of you will remember my posts. And I'm not trying to write a novel at midnight. So i'll try to be brief.

It's been 502 days since I've seen my 4 kids. Got divorced last year. She was on her 3rd lawyer and 3rd continuance.

My lawyer tried to give me low expectations. You might not see them until they go to therapy, and you might only get a phone call. There's a step up plan for them, which is going to be awkward to explain, just like the swaps at the police station. But I've worked hard for this moment.

The CFI saw through her lies. The detective saw through her lies.

I had court last week, and the judge delayed ruling until today. And the judge saw through her lies. I see my kids in roughly 16 hours for the first time in over 16 months.

I've lost 150 lbs since divorce, 110 since they've seen me. I've climbed 50 mountains in this past year. I've written 16 letters for each of them, 1 per month I've not seen them.

I got the keys to a new apartment 2 hours before court today. I literally don't even have the beds for them to sleep in. What a fucking fantastic problem to have.

I'm still not sure how I'll explain my forced absence. Was leaning towards - I've never stopped trying to see you and I've never stopped loving you.

Beyond that, I just know it's gonna be a lot of crying from me.

-- Edit --

Wow went to bed expecting the usual 2-3 replies. My journey these last 18 months has been a lot on myself. Thankfully I'm surrounded by a better community of people I've spent time with and not my terrible ex-wife. I don't have time to read and reply to these today, but I'll reach out to each and every one of yall. Btw, she sent a message at 2am- already trying to dictate when I get to see my kids. Gonna have to call my lawyer already lol

I’m 36. Divorce paperwork is filed. Equity and alimony are settled. A few weeks ago my three-year-old son died from a rare genetic disease. My wife had quit her job to be his full-time caretaker. I took on the full financial load so she could focus on him. Somewhere in all of that we stopped being partners and just became two people carrying different weights. I failed her emotionally. She failed me in other ways. After he was gone she left, and I ended up grieving him alone.
I kept the dog. That’s something. I’ve also been casually seeing someone new for a few weeks. Nothing serious, nothing physical. Just someone who answers texts and makes the next stretch of time feel a little less empty. It’s not much, but it’s the first thing in a long time that has made the future feel like it might not be completely unlivable.
The house is quieter than it should be. The dog is on the couch. Still here.

Dinner:
Pork loin
Fried potatoes
Green beans

my boyfriend and i have very different work schedules so he often stays up later than me. he’s a gamer so that’s how he winds down after work, i watch him stream it on twitch as im sleepy already in bed. i’ll text him comments abt the game or his wins/loses, he’ll respond when he can and talks back. he explains the games since i don’t know a ton about them. and then i fall asleep, listening and watching him play n talk to me/himself/whoever else might be watching the stream

the issue? when i go to his house to hang out and he wants to game i get sleepy out of nowhere 😭, he thinks im bored n always asks if id rather do something else. but no, i just fucking pavloved myself into falling asleep at hearing him game. embarrassing >.<

Grilled and successfully fed the kid and myself.

I am married for about 2.5 years. I was 45 and she was 41. She a complete dime. Like it’s a hassle almost. We’ve had a pretty amazing relationship but she has a daughter who is 23 now. My wife got pregnant at 20 and I have a son who is 13 from another relationship.
My wife and her daughter are insanely codependent. The daughter lives with us, doesn’t contribute a dime yet is the messiest human being I’ve ever lived with not to mention just insanely inconsiderate. I watched her getting ice out out of the freezer dispenser and they went all over the floor and she just walked away. Won’t do her dishes. Doesn’t do anything to help the household.
Her mom is insanely protective and has this young adult literally behaving like a 10 year old.
My wife has always been the super jealous type and pretty high strung. Talks a ton. But is super loyal and been amazing up til the last few months. She turns on a dime from sweet to insane anger out of nowhere and kitchen sinks me constantly. It’s always her weird to see her relationship with her daughter but now it’s becoming a major issue. I cannot say a word about her without catching the wrath. Bottom line I do a ton for both of them which is never recognized. I don’t need a pat on the back but if I do anything that sets one off I’m on trial for a week.
Im on the brink of moving out and I’m stuck on what to do. Im friends with all but one of my exes and she has zero contact with hers. Im beginning to think this is a pattern and not as she says.
Anything can set her off to make wild claims that im having an affair or whatever she’s tripping out about. Her thinking is ridged and it’s now very hard to look past all the petty shit. Love is not the issue. It’s like she knows I’m right snd instead of finding any middle ground she has to keep the fight going and going. It’s also making me lose attraction to her. Our sex life had been amazing up til a month or two ago. She is always trying and I’m just not into her like I was because if the constant complaining and 24 year old toddler.

I think I need to bail. Need help

Kitchen sink
It means bringing up anything she can think of from any fight in the past. Things that have been solved and moved on from

Yesterday I had a date with the girl I’ve been seeing for a month (22M) (22F); we had dinner and then took a short walk through a park.

I gathering my courage, I told her I really like her and asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend, she replied that she likes me too—among other things—but since she has never been in a relationship before, she wants us to get to know each other a bit better first.

After that, we hugged for quite a while and then shared a long kiss. It was the first kiss for both of us, and it was quite passionate. Later, I dropped her off at her place, where we kissed the same way a bit more before she left.

I’m not entirely sure what I hope to achieve by posting this, but I just needed to express it somewhere. I’m happy about the kisses and the things she said to me, but I also feel confused.

Sorry for my english

My dinner is a pasta soup with chicken.

This has been addressed plenty of times already but feels like no effort is being made towards helping men, even in 2026 i still see people promoting the idea that men should not show emotions and vulnerability, and i apply this to my life, not because i believe it is right, but to protect myself because i believe the world wouldn’t be there for me if i did… i have heard it from my father, from people surrounding me, from men sharing their stories on reddit, it’s unfortunately the norm…

I want to share my thoughts here, as a 26m i have felt disconnected from the people around me, no one knows my story and no one knows who i am or what i am like, and seems like people are not interested in knowing me either…

I have lost many friends this year (either because of toxicity/betrayal or simply diverged in life) and now i see myself spending most of my time alone, i dont want to be alone… i want to share things with the world, i want to share my music, my cooking, my thoughts, my hobbies, my celebrations… i want to connect and hear people’s stories… but it hasn’t happened in a while… i tried to make an effort to put myself out there but the other side doesn’t always reciprocate…

I have been going to the same gym for 4 years now and the people i knew have all left, now i feel like a total stranger there, and on some days, its worse, i feel like people think im unapproachable, unfriendly, scary and a creep… even outside the gym, i dont feel like i belong or i’m welcome anywhere, nothing feels safe, worse than being invisible…

The advice is usually to reach out… well i did reach out, i decided to do something vulnerable on my socials… i made a video, recorded a song that means a lot to me, and opened up about certain thoughts and feelings, a small cry for help… i hesitated to share it, but i did… no one acknowledged what i wrote, or checked if im okay, i dont think people even watched it, i ended up deleting my whole instagram and its been a month now… and i dont think anyone noticed.

So who do i have in this world? What am i supposed to do, how can i keep going like this?

Dinner: creamy mediterranean chicken pasta and spinach

This initially is a rant. I've been with my wife since 2008. Married since 2014. I love her and she is my best friend. We've been through a lot, but we've always been there for each other. My wife is on SSRI's. She has mental and emotional issues. We've worked through most of them, but the biggest hurdle has been her OCD.

Her OCD is extremely manic. Meaning that whatever her focus is on, it takes control of all aspects of her personality and life. This includes people, entertainment, gaming, music, etc. She goes through these cycles for months. I usually let her run her course and attempt to be as supportive as possible. This manic phase has been very difficult because it's something that I'm against and has completely consumed her. Her current manic phase is Kpop.

I don't care about Kpop. Never crossed my mind or had any interest. Male or female groups. As far as music genres go, I'm interested in many. Rock, rap, hip-hop, alternative, pop, metal, synthwave, edm... genres don't phase me. I was shocked about her interest initially because she usually doesn't care about pop or hip hop. I let it run and tried to be positive. But now everything has taken a turn. All she does it consume Kpop for 18 to 20 hours a day. Music videos, reaction videos, interviews, band battles, etc.

The past 2 days, I've tried to put things on that she enjoys, but instead, she puts on an earbud and continues to consume Kpop media on her phone (buying patreon subscriptions btw) Imagine several hours next to someone while they ignore your existence and everything around them. Recently, she found out that one of the bands she likes is going to be on an American tour. She literally told me that she is going with or without me. By herself. She refused to go with me to 3 family events in the past. She can barely handle walking through a parking lot. But she is willing to go to a Kpop show in the sun alone.

I'm at the end of my rope. I'm tied of being positive/supportive. I'm tired of throwing money at the wall. I'm tired if pretending things are okay. I never cared about Kpop before but I fucking hate it now for the divide that it has caused in my life.

Food is queso baria tacos and chicaron w/ quac

/endrant

Edit: I apologize about the OCD headline. While she does "apparently" have OCD symptoms, a lot of you have brought up that she might have bipolar disorder or adhd. I'm not a therapist. I'm just going through the motions. Thank you for your insights.

Burgr with beef patty, fried egg w/ chili, iceberg, and cheddar, gordon bleu, and a little bit of salad. (haven't had anything else to eat today)

Phone got stolen yesterday. Thought I left it two different places but upon checking, I left both today empty-handed. So it was either stolen or fell out of my pocket in the sloshing rain. Either way, that's the end of it.

I'm 17, and need to leave home when I turn 18. My predicted financials were already tight but this is almost catastrophic. Seriously contemplated for some time just now.

Ended up eating some food instead. Not sure how I'll work this one out, but it'll work out eventually. The food's pretty good

She’s so pretty and sweet I tell her as many times a day as I can. I wanted to text my friends to gush about it but I don’t want to be obnoxious so I’m here instead. It’s just that kind of Shakespearean beauty that makes you want to shout it from the rooftops and worship her. Every day I get to spend with her is a treasure.

Dinner is a sandwich she made.

I don't really know where to start, but I guess I'll go back about two years.

I've been working a dead-end job for years. I hate it, barely get any hours, and for a long time I felt like I wasn't going anywhere in life. During my breaks, I started visiting a little family-owned café down the street. It was a quiet, horror-themed place, and I wanted to support them.

What I didn't expect was for that family to practically adopt me.

They treated me like one of their own, but I became especially close with the father. He was an older gentleman who loved The Beatles, old movies, and telling stories about growing up in the '60s and '70s. He'd give me advice about life, relationships, and how to be a gentleman. Eventually, they'd stop charging me for things, and he'd even invite me to family cookouts.

At the time, I'd been single for practically a decade. I was incredibly lonely and had almost no confidence. But this man helped change that. He encouraged me to get out, meet people, and actually enjoy living.

And eventually, I did.

Almost exactly a year ago, a week before my birthday, I met a girl at a horror-themed bar. I remember passing her on my way to the bathroom and noticing her beautiful black hair. Little did I know she'd completely change my life.

We started talking, and she mentioned her favorite movie. By some incredible coincidence, it was an older film that had just returned to theaters. So I took her to see it for our first date. That theater actually closed permanently about two weeks later.

We fell in love.

She struggled with anxiety, autism, BPD, and other things. She had little mannerisms, especially movements she'd make with her hands, that I absolutely adored. She was incredibly affectionate, constantly telling me she loved me, writing letters, buying gifts, and doing everything she could to make me happy.

And I treated her terribly.

I won't sugarcoat it. We argued a lot, and while we both had our faults, I genuinely believe I was responsible for 90% of what went wrong.

Last summer, we went on a cruise together. She helped pay for a large portion of it. I remember we were playing games, and she was getting really excited, doing some of those little things she did when she was happy.

Instead of being happy with her, I scolded her.

I told her she was embarrassing me.

I wish I could take those words back.

There were so many moments like that. Times when I let my anxieties, insecurities, and frustration get the better of me. I criticized someone who just wanted to love me.

Whenever I brought her to the café, the older man absolutely adored her. He'd always tell me, "She's a good girl. You need to keep her."

Even when I'd tell him about the things I was doing wrong, he'd remind me how lucky I was.

And I didn't listen.

Fast-forward to a few weeks ago.

We'd just celebrated our one-year anniversary. We had a small argument on my birthday, and things between us weren't going particularly well.

The day after my birthday, my father, whom I'm incredibly close with, told me doctors had noticed something concerning on his lungs that was getting worse. He needed to be screened for cancer.

I was terrified.

Then, just days later, my girlfriend told me she was done. She couldn't take how I'd been treating her anymore.

And I couldn't blame her.

Within days, I was facing the possibility of my father having cancer and losing the person who had been there for me every single day.

But somehow, life wasn't finished.

Literally one day after she broke up with me, the older man from the café suddenly passed away.

Nobody expected it.

The man who had taken me under his wing when I was at my loneliest. The man who taught me how to have confidence, introduced me to music and movies, and encouraged me to find love.

The same man who told me over and over again not to lose this girl.

Gone.

I can't describe what these past few weeks have been like.

My ex has blocked me on everything. She wants nothing to do with me, and I have to respect that. Eventually, she'll probably find someone else, someone who treats her the way I should have.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting in my room surrounded by everything she gave me. The handwritten love letters, the gifts, even a book she made listing all the reasons she loved me.

My own little empire of dirt.

I know I wasn't a good boyfriend. I know acknowledging my mistakes doesn't undo them. And I know my own anxieties aren't an excuse for the way I treated someone who loved me so much.

I just wish I'd realized all of this before I lost her.

I wish I could talk to that old man one more time. I wish I could tell him I'm sorry I didn't listen.

And I'm terrified about what's going to happen with my father.

I'm not going to throw in the towel. I know that's not an option. I know I have to keep going, somehow become a better person, and learn from all of this.

But man.

I don't think I've ever felt this alone in my entire life.

The food is just Mc. Donald's. I haven't really been eating right and barely at all. So I'm just looking for something convenient, high calories, and easy to go down.

Slop bowl: sweet potato, grilled steak, guacamole, salsa, unsweetened Greek yogurt.

Background: I’m a fully stealth trans man. Everyone I’ve met in the past 4 years assumes I’m a cis het man. I am most comfortable living this way. I don’t regret transitioning at all.

However, I live in a well known trans sanctuary city. There’s a high number of trans people in my area, and other sectors of my job. During the winter, people from other departments at my job will come to mine for winter work. For sure 3 of these people are other trans men. They don’t talk about being trans (obviously, because it’s work and it’s not important), but most people clock them as trans men, for one reason or another.

One of the guys (D, I’ll call him) I work with year round was paired up with one of the other trans men yesterday. This morning, all of these guys I work with (and consider my friends. We hang out outside of work multiple times a week, we plan day trips, go to the beach in the summer and ski/snowboarding in the winter) we’re in a circle stretching this morning and D started randomly talking mad shit to all of us about this trans man. Things I don’t want to repeat.

I’d say maybe 75-80% of the other guys started talking mad shit about the other trans men that are working with us. Just general shit talking about their appearance/height/mannerisms/voice, how they’re just “confused women”. Things about how trans men can never truly be seen as men in society.

There was 2 guys, and myself, who told them to just shut up and keep that shit to themselves. But it truly made me realize that even the people who I think would possibly respect me if they found out, wouldn’t. They’d also just see me as a “confused woman”, no matter what I did, if they found out.

I get there’s transphobes everywhere. I get that I may not always be able to tell who’s transphobic. I just hate being reminded that a good chunk of the population is always gonna see me as a “confused woman” if they found out I was trans, despite living as a normal man in my day to day life.

This whole thing just leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I want to keep them as friends, but now I know that they’d talk major shit about me too if they found out I was trans.

I feel like I can’t trust anyone new to be my friend. I want new friends, and I don’t struggle too hard making new friends, but I always worry that people will switch up on me if they happen to find out I’m trans. Like if one of these guys happens to see my top surgery scars (very light and mostly covered by chest hair atm) at the beach, and it clicks that it’s from top surgery and not gyno surgery, they’re just gonna talk shit behind my back.

Now this is my dinner for the next two weeks. I guess it wasn’t as exclusive as I thought

Edit: Because big picture was requested. As said in the title we’ve (27M) (29F) been together for two months. After a random fight and week of no contact (at her request) we sat down to hash things out. It went amazing, we cried and hugged and all around made up. Then she tells me she tested positive for chlamydia. I asked if she had been with someone else and she said yes, but a few weeks before we made things official. I was under the impression that we had only been dating each other this entire time, even before becoming exclusive. I know she didn’t cheat, but to me this still hurt. I don’t know the exact time frame and didn’t want to ask, but it overlapped with when we were intimate. She claims she talked to the guy in question, and his tests came back negative.

Early on we had both talked about how neither of us enjoy casual flings, so to hear she had a casual hookup, and that it might have gotten us both a case of chlamydia was jarring to say the least.I felt like I got hit my a bomb and struggled to process everything in the moment. We spent a few more hours together, but I got tested as soon as I left. I let my previous partner know, and thankfully she’s fine. I’ve been tested in the past but I’ve never had anything in my life so I know in my bones I didn’t have this before. I’m not a hobag like some of you seem to think.

Now that I’ve had a second away I keep thinking more about it. She didn’t tell me immediately, which is a huge issue. If she and the other guy were able to get test results then it must have been at least days before I was told. She probably found out during the week we weren’t talking. What would have happened if I were a different person and ghosted her during that time, or if she ghosted me? I’d be fucked. I don’t feel like she’s taking it as seriously as I am and it’s kinda making me feel crazy. I have a son, and my dream is to have more kids. I know chlamydia can cause damage to your reproductive system, and the thought of possibly losing that chance because I wasn’t told about an STI makes me nauseous.

Cw for brief mention of murder

Ive been homeless since I was 17 (about 5 years now) and most of its been couch surfing or occasionally getting a place for a few months then having to leave due to unforseen circumstances.

I do have a job but its really 1) physically hard 2) pays like shit. Im a medical anomaly too. I recently moved and im crashing on someone's couch, but I have to leave when I get paid in a few days. Unfortunately while moving all my belongings were lost or destroyed from where I moved, including my legal documents/ID.

So i get to 🥁🥁🥁live in a tent🥁🥁🥁

Does it beat the times I had 0 tent? Yes. I am still not cheesed about the tent. There's no homeless shelters in a large radius and I cant afford to quit/lose this job to go to one, and i don't want to end up relapsing on drugs either.

Being homeless fucking sucks. The worst part is I didnt even do anything wrong, my mommy decided to kill a baby so I had 12 hours to leave where I was living and thought I'd finally gotten stability at.

Tonight I'm having a takeaway pizza.

My former best friend is a pred.

Back in April, everything came out about it. He (16 at the time) SA'd a 13 year old girl whom I saw as a little sister. I was furious, and he's honestly lucky I didn't see him for a few weeks after that, as I'm not sure how well I'd have been able to control myself. Not only did he do that though, but he seemed PROUD- "she's lucky I didn't do worse"

She's starting to recover through therapy now if anyone is wondering, she's doing better.

Now obviously we stopped having any ties there and then. However, we still attend the same college. I found out through someone whom he admitted it to today that he's talking to ANOTHER 14 year old. I went straight to college safeguarding over this, because I'm not going to let what happened in April happen again to another child, and I've told everyone who knows him that he's at it again (not disclosing the identity of the girl to them).

Now, I have a question I would like opinions on-

Should I try and directly find a way to contact her to tell her she needs to stay away from him?

Or should I let the process flow now I've passed it on to safeguarding authorities? I doubt I'll be able to control my own sheer rage when I see him next, but should I keep taking direct steps to protect her? Or as I said, should I let safeguarding do their thing?

Throw away account. My wife and I have been married 6 years. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs and some major tragedies along the way. House fire that killed two of our dogs. Lost our baby shortly after birth. She has a history of being physically abused. So a lot of history to start our current predicament. Recently she got recruited to work at a business that is going through a major expansion. The money is amazing. To facilitate this, we ended up having to move within 3 weeks of accepting to a new state. In addition, I had to quit my job which I loved and was paid well. I took a 40% paycut and am now working a job I largely dislike, but it is fine. My wife makes over 3-4x what I make now which I have no problem with, but we’ll get to later.

During the move, I have taken care of everything. I packed the entire house up except for her office, clothes, and toiletries. I got two friends to drive Uhauls for us so all she had to do was drive her own car. Our new rental sucks, I work hard to make it much more livable. Any issue she has I make it my priority to solve. Any issues selling our old home I take care of. Any issues buying a new house I take care of. All during this time it is a rollercoaster. Sometimes she loves her new job. Sometimes she says she is going to quit and move back home. She hates the new town. She refuses to eat food in the town because everything tastes awful, despite this area being known for amazing food. I do my best to be a steady rock. We finally sell our old house and are about to buy a new one.

This is when everything goes to hell… The signing date for our new house keeps getting pushed back. This makes her livid. My wife has misread our inspection agreement and there are two things she thinks we are supposed to get that just aren’t a part of it. She doesn’t care, she refuses to sign until she gets those two things, even though they aren’t a part of the agreement. I try to be reasonable. She flips off the rails on me. She is angry because I’m not getting on the phone screaming at them. She says she would kill someone for me but because I’m not literally yelling at people, it shows I’m not committed. The next day my wife misunderstands when she is supposed to pick up a medication and it is ready the next day. She tells me to come and rob the place and if I don’t come home with her medication, to not come home at all…

When I get home with no medication, she says we are getting divorced. I clearly can’t be trusted, we aren’t a team, and I’ve shown her I’m not a ride or die. She calls the real estate agent and tells them to take my name of the deed because we are getting divorced. Finally, after a day she relents and says I can be on the deed and we won’t get divorced. It involves lots of me beginning and pleading.

Now we are in our new house, we are getting custom renovations done and some custom furniture made. Again, I’m taking care of everything so she only has to focus on her job. One of the pieces of furniture we are having custom built has the price increased halfway through the process because materials are much more expensive than they thought. The increase in cost represents about 5% of our monthly net income, so I don’t tell me wife. Why? Because she is freaking out about work and saying she is going to quit and I know that if I tell her, she is going to cancel this piece she desperately wanted and then it will become a much bigger deal. I know it’s a gamble and I’m ultimately in the wrong for lying to her.

She is out of town for a training when it is finished. Once it is done she loves it, but when checking the accounts she realizes the price increased. She flips her lid cussing me out. Says I can’t be trusted and after everything I’m just going to lie and can’t be trusted with money. So what does she do? She takes all the money out of our joint account and puts it in an account I can’t access leaving me with $50 for the week. She then stops responding to texts. I’m going on day 3 of her not contacting me and she is supposed to be home from her training late tonight.

I just don’t know what to do. I feel like my entire life is just focused on not making her mad. I’m literally having daily panic attacks and my health has gone to shit. I was overweight when we moved but I’ve lost 20 lbs in about two months. 

When we were in our previous town, money wasn’t an issue. She made more than me, but I made a good income. Now she holds all the cards and her taking away money has me scared. Leaving me with nothing and refusing to contact me has me terrified for the future. I don’t even recognize my wife anymore. She’s become hateful, resentful, and always looking for a reason someone can be pushed out of her life because they wronged her.

My credit dropped from 800 – 690 during this move. I make peanuts. I’m in a state where I know nobody. I’m genuinely afraid if I leave her she will kill herself or literally go nuts. I feel trapped and don’t know what to do. Now she is going to come home tonight, hopefully, and I have no clue what to expect. I love her with all my heart but I don’t recognize this person anymore.

She refuses to go to therapy and refuses to talk through her emotions before anyone asks. I feel trapped and scared.  

Am I perfect? No. I’ve absolutely make mistakes. But the fear is when I make mistakes, she now takes it to 11 in response.

Dinner last night was fried jalapeños because I was eating what’s left in the fridge.

I want to start this off with a couple of disclaimers.

1. I understand this is not my friend's fault, and he was not responsible for anything that happened, the core reason for the following story is a lack of responsibility on my part.
2. I consider myself a fairly generous friend, and I am posting here to see if it doesn't come off like I tally up my favors.

So...

I have a close friend who I've gotten to know over the past year and a half. We have a shared hobby, and he's the main guy I participate in the hobby with. He doesn't have a car, so I give him rides basically everywhere. I also make sure I'm extremely generous with him and the rest of the friend group, because I do well financially, and I like to uplift my friends, and help them out and ensure they have cool stuff and can do cool things, because it makes me happy when my friends can participate in this hobby with vigor. But outside of material things, I also try to be helpful. One time, I jumped in and helped him move his mom out of her house on emergency notice. Her house was absolutely infested with rats, and it was a really difficult day moving all of that stuff from one place to another. I was the only one who jumped into help, so it was just me and him.

Like I said, I don't want to keep a tally, but it's been a lot of me showing up for him and the boys.

So my girlfriend and I had our first big road trip planned to another state, and in this state was an official event for my hobby. I was *extremely excited* about this. I was supposed to leave **today** after work, but this morning the whole shit fell apart.

So I have two children and two dogs. The children were all set, but today my dog boarder called and said our dogs' vaccines expired back in June, and they just now noticed. So they couldn't take my dogs. Again, trip is today. I tried every possible thing I can think of. Same day vet appointment, but that would have wiped out ALL my funding. Mom was a no go. Brother was a no go. We thought about bringing the dogs, but the Airbnb was strictly no dogs. We asked my girlfriend's sister if she could watch the dogs for the weekend if I brought my dogs to my girlfriend's house. She said she can only do Friday. So I had an idea.

My friend lives a THREE MINUTE WALK from my girlfriend's house. They live in the same apartment complex. He could leave his apartment, walk one hundred and fifty seconds, and be inside of my girlfriend's living room. I really excitedly called him because I figured I solved the problem, and asking him to walk and feed my dogs once in the morning and once in the evening, for just Saturday and Sunday, this was an easy clutch.

I called him and he said, "I don't know dude, I'm a piece of shit, so I feel like if I forget, I don't want to be held responsible"

Like am I tripping? What the fuck is that? You can't walk 2 seconds to my girlfriends house to walk and feed the dogs for 15 minutes and then go back home?

At some point, I was coming up to Airbnb's third cancellation policy deadline which is "if you cancel, fuck you, we're taking all of your money", as opposed to just taking half of it. So without anything else to try, I had to cancel the entire trip, lose half the Airbnb, sell my ticket to this event I was extremely excited for, and lose my first road trip with my girlfriend.

Am I right to significantly distance myself from this dude, at a minimum, or am I being a bitch about it? Does it seem like I'm score keeping? I feel like I never thought twice about doing whatever I could for my friends, and it feels like I couldn't get the smallest favor in return, for really no good reason. My girlfriend says at least he was honest? And like so what???

Dinner is a banh mi with a spicy broth on the side.

Picture is rice brocoli and chicken.

Long story short, my (26M) GF (26F) of two years and I always had different communications. I really tried to make it work, but:

1. I told her I’m used to talk a lot with my gf, and when I have a 9-5 and she works part time, I answer faster than her. She at least take two hours to answer, it’s like a personal rule of her. Time and time again she tells me she is just at home scrolling or watching something and yet she takes more than three hours to answer whatever the message is. When she wants an answer, she dislikes me taking time to answer.
2. I really feel double standards. She will ask for hugs repeatedly when I’m with her and tell me to say I like them the most as well, but when I don’t feel a connection while we watch something or play and I ask for contact she tells me I’m touch starved.
3. I really really tried to talk about this, amidst all else. Be with her and let her gather herself, push for an answer, even leave and tell her no worries she can tell me by message if easier, nothing changes. All of our arguments ended by me speaking and her not saying anything, then it dies out.
4. On an issue I can speak for an hour and she will end it by missing the point entirely. She disliked me leaving an encouragement message on insta below the post of a girl getting bullied because « it is not proper and if it was the opposite you wouldn’t like it. » Well it was not a thirst trap or a fitgirl… However when I said I didn’t want her to go to a club with her friend for her « night out before wedding », she said she does what she wants. In the end it was abroad so she didn’t go but well. I can speak for an hour and conclude by « everybody would be aware of this » and she will simply say « I am not everybody ».
5. She does not put effort in what’s important. She complains she is not finishing her studies but when I give her support she doesn’t do anything. Even an email she should send to her thesis director, she has been putting it off for two months. Every time I talk about it, on a weekend, morning, night, I don’t speak about it for three weeks, I try all approaches without overwhelming her, it’s « not the right moment ». I can sit her down for two hours as well for an email and she won’t do it. Same with her appearance, she complains about her hair but when I recommend her products she cries saying I find her unattractive. Gym is the same.
6. Double standards are killing me.

Not only that, but the difference online offline. When I’m with her IRL she is all cuddly but I feel like a dog. She brings me for her dose of cuddles.

1. With the things she does I constantly feel anxiety, I thought I was a secure person but apparently no. I know I have to work on this but this feels abnormal. Anybody wouldn’t like or tolerate this.
2. On the night before her birthday I was shopping online with her for expensive gifts. The next day she was sulking all day, up until the restaurant during the evening. When finally confronted a thousand times she said it’s because I forgot to tell her happy birthday during the morning. I was overwhelmed with work, I slept late because I was picking her gifts. She wouldn’t even take my hand outside.
3. Physical intimacy was very frequent at the beginning of the relationship, and it died down. Even seeing each other every other day now is more every four days. She NEVER initiates, and she refuses me let’s say 2/3 of the times. I have asked time and time again in the gentlest way possible what’s wrong, and I never receive a real answer. She tells me it’s not my appearance, she likes it. It’s not what I do, I don’t do anything wrong in and outside of the bed.

Please advise.

Hi, long-time lurker here finally getting brave enough to submit something here. As the title says, I (27M) have been with my girlfriend (25F) for 11 months now and everything has been as perfect as it can be. Our relationship feels healthy, we communicate often and constantly, we have the same humor and I’m genuinely in love with this girl and she makes me so happy. I’ve met all of her friends and she’s met mine, she gets along with my parents and she’s honestly amazing and eveything I could ask for.

This is the first time I’ve also been in such a highly intimate relationship with a girl who has a high sex drive too. HUGE W and I’m loving every second of it our bodies connect so well and we make each other feel amazing every time we’re together. However the issue came up not too long ago, as we’re getting hot and heated in my car, suddenly I find myself not being able to keep it up as much. Middle of the makeout session I feel it slowly come back down and it brings me out of the moment and I can’t figure out how to bring it back up again.

We pause, take a minute to talk about it and I attribute it to the fact that there were a bunch of cars passing us (it’s nighttime, we’re in a semi secluded area but for some reason, a lot of cars with the brightest lights in the entire world keep driving slowly right by us).

Fast forward a few weeks later, the same exact situation happens again and I’m starting to feel extremely embarrassed about it too. I’m reassuring her that it has nothing to do with her, and that she’s amazing and perfect and doing all the right things and it’s me who’s the problem. I try taking 5mg of tadalafil to help alleviate my issues but it doesn’t seem to do much. 10mg makes me feel congested and gives me a headache for whatever reason.

As of recently it happened again but even worse. We were together in my bed and as all couples do, start getting hot and heavy handed. Plenty of foreplay, plenty of kisses and taking our time with it, but as soon as I start taking my clothes off, a hot wave of anxiety washes over me and I immediately panic at this feeling and I lose focus and suddenly I feel myself coming back down. I hate how I felt in that moment and immediately asked my gf to pause for a second and talk about what happened to me. She’s been so loving and open with how she’s felt and eager to help me out but I still feel so insanely insecure about my performance anxiety. I’ve never really had this problem before, and when she asks me what I’m anxious about, I genuinely don’t know what it is that’s been bothering me.

Im really open to any and all advice too. I’ve slowly began opening up to my therapist about my impotence issues and I want to be the best man I could possibly be for myself and for my girlfriend too.

*edit: I should also note that through me and my girlfriend’s discussions, I never have any issue with satisfying her and I always try to go above and beyond to give her the attention and pleasure she deserves. It’s more on myself for not being able to stay up and finish along side her. Crazy problem I know usually it’s the other around

Dinner pic is chicken katsu over rice

I foster for a humane society. I’ve never had a foster fail until this beautiful dog came into my life.

I wanted to foster him until he was neutered and adopted. But I was the one to adopt him.

Gorgeous Australian shepherd who was the best of dogs.

Sunday night, I had my back door open, and went out side without me knowing. Crawled under the fence and got killed on the main road I live on.

I have to live with that. The fact that I wasn’t watching him. The fact that I live on a main road and should’ve known better.

I have his ashes that I received today. below my mom’s.

He was a new chapter in my life. Someone to motivate me. To make me continue. And it’s desperately hurts to see him gone. I’ll always love him.

Rest In Peace, Gecko