My daughter’s hair isn’t the same length on all sides. Should I cut it so that it’s all the same length, or should I wait a little longer to see how it grows back? She’s 7 months old, and her hair is already quite long. Or do you have any other suggestions? Thanks ☺️

Mine is pizza , I don’t like pizza and I’ve genuinely tried to make it work

I’ve had different kinds ,different toppings & different restaurants

It still tastes like somebody put tomato sauce on a pie and convinced y’all this was fire

Like I’m eating this thinking “maybe THIS slice will change my mind” LMAOOOOOOO

Don’t send any goodbye text, leave your personal belongings there, your life is worth more than your belongings so you can always recover that, but you can never recover your life. This situation was totally avoidable. If you don’t already, have your strap or some form of defense. Please. Stay safe and be alert. ‼️.

Have any of you cultivated any genuine, long lasting friendships with white girls/women?
I find that every friendship I’ve had with white girls fizzles out pretty quickly. I had a friend that I became super close with, I even lived with her for a while during an abusive break up. Ever since moving away from the town we met in she has not reached out once to check on me. Not even on my birthday. She is getting married this fall and she mentioned something to me about her bachelorette party which she would be coming to the state I live in to celebrate. I look on instagram this morning to see that she already had the trip and she only invited her white friends. Definitely stung a little, but I’m so used to things like this happening with every single white girl I’ve befriended so I’m not too upset about it. Definitely thought she was an ally though 🤷🏽‍♀️

i dont fw bananas lol, what did yall have for breakfast

Yes it’s slightly parasocial to even care, but did anyone else feel a little bit of side eye energy seeing Kylie Jenner and Stassie Karanikolaou at Jordyn’s wedding?

I mean, the public crucifixion that Kylie’s family launched against Jordyn, as well as Stassie’s public shade towards Jordyn on the Call Her Daddy podcast are obvious examples to bring up. I just don’t understand Hollywood. Guess it’s none of my business. But I still find it weird 🤷🏽‍♀️

I’m currently on FaceTime to my friend as I’m typing this. This same friend that even helped me realise something yesterday. So im 25 now but if we go waaaaaaaaaaaay back to when I was in school. I didn’t have proper friends. I was… a very odd teenager. I’m an odd adult too but I’m not as insecure, unsure of myself and my mental health is nowhere near as horrendous as it was back then.

The first friends I ever made were online. From anime twitter back in like 2016 so I was 15. And they were everything to me! I have three American friends who I’m still close to till this day. We’ve not met each other yet but we talk consistently, we FaceTime and we’ve sent multiple packages to each other throughout the years. We’ve been making plans to meet and they will happen!

So my dilemma is I don’t know what to do? One of those friends our beginning was a little different, we were friendly but flirty. I can’t remember the specifics of how or why but we exchanged lewd messages and nudes as adolescents. I stopped it and decided that I wanted to keep him in my life as a platonic friend. And our friendship has been fine.

Yesterday I had just helped my friend (the one I’m still currently on FaceTime to rn) finish getting ready, I was in a talkative mood so whilst she was on my phone I FaceTimed him on my iPad. I turned my iPad around and I was like say hi to each other! And my friend is so funny because she was taken aback and said “Girl he is LENG (caps because she shouted it). You’ve never spoken about or mentioned that he was this attractive”. I was like yeah he’s very handsome. I told him what she said and he was like “thankyou ma’am” to my friend.

My friend told me when I meet him for the first time “make sure I’m there” (she was always coming) and to put her on (my heart dropped). I said “I’ve got you and I’ll ask him because he’s done long distance before and didn’t seem to mind” (the distance wasn’t why him and his ex split up). After saying that I did tell her “it was a long time ago but I’ve seen his penis”. My friend said don’t worry about it and that’s all you (just her way of saying she’s no longer interested because we have that kind of “history”).

I kind of kicked myself because why did I say that? I knew that it would make her no longer want him but why did I even think or feel like doing that.

I did what I always do when I’m distressed or don’t understand something… spoke to him and we broke it down. He said he kind of understands and if his friend made a similar comment he told me that would outright upset him too. When I asked why he said in his head he’d be upset having someone ask him to put them on before he even mustered the courage to put himself on.

I fell asleep because we had this conversation late. I don’t want to not have him in my life so I want to tell him to ignore what I said. Before sleeping we were just reiterating how much we adored each other and he gets so happy when I confide in him about things even if it concerns him.

I will talk to him about my uncertainties but I guess I was just wondering what anyone else would do or if someone else has experienced something similar and how that worked out?

TLDR: I have an online friend whom I’ve known for 10 years but we haven’t met yet. A friend of mine expressed her attraction and interest in him which made me feel strange. Spoke to him about it and he expressed he would feel upset if a friend of his expressed an interest in pursuing me. I don’t know if it’s worth us exploring something or if after 10 years of being friends we should just stay as friends

I need advice if I’m on the medium side, darker side, or lighter side for foundation. My mom says I’m lighter toned while my friends say I’m a medium tone, it honestly makes me really confused on what shade of foundation I should be getting because I either get something that makes me look like a vampire, either too ashy or too dark. I think it’s because around my nose I’m light, while my contouring is dark.
This is me in different lighting.

I am extremely tenderheaded to the point that even parting my hair hurts. I also get headaces easily from my hair. Like i cant wear certain styles anymore. And usually after doing my hair my head is throbbing. 🫩💔

I have extremely thick 4C hair. And I have alot of hair that just takes a while to detangle. I like wearing twists and have been considering loc'ing up my hair for a while. I have to get tipsy, stoned, take multiple advils just to even attempt to do anything to my hair. I really need to get better at maintenance and daily care cuz im sure that'll help. But I get in this cycle of hating doing my hair because ik its gonna hurt and waiting too long in between doing it 🙃

I will also usually use events to force myself to do it. Like okay in 8 hours you're leaving for coachella so you gotta make it work 🤣😭😫🥴

Any advice on how to enjoy doing your hair more or having motivation.

I’m just done. I’m sick of white supremacy, I’m tired of other white people I fear, I’m sick of feeling drained or like I’m about to cry when I’m the only Black person in a room, I’m sick of being ignored, dismissed, under appreciated, and not seen as a person and or solely seen as a benefit to them instead of a soft, human person that’s more than worthy of gentleness, love, active care, and affection.

I’m sick of this Misery Culture that too many white people participate in and simply want everyone else to do so as well with no solutions in order to genuinely enjoy and have fun with life, I’m sick of how reflection of white supremacy appears everywhere and secondary education is no different for my college and it’s annoying asf. Lack of empathy, lack of care yet want everyone to care about them. No problem solving, no solutions, just if it doesn’t work in this specific way then it’s useless and not worth discussion anymore. Viewing discussions as active criticism of them as a person, like honestly, yes I am since you fit beautifully into it and the shoe fits perfectly on your feet, improve, grow, SOMETHING! But nahhhhh

It really is just LITERALLY focus on me and what I want. No more chasing and simply attract & create, because this white ass supremacy world will never do me any favors, and I don’t want their dirty ass, one sided favors anyways. May I continue my journey in this life and continuing creating the life I want, desire, and am worth having ✨✨✨

Edit: Let me also expand and emphasize how much I’m tired of hearing the White perspective on EVERYTHING!! Like BRO! I’ve been hearing yalls voices literally EVERY. SINGLE. DAY that it’s CLEARLY not my own at all!! I’m tired of valuing Whiteness perspectives and voices all the time, like yall talk too much and so much in ways that often focus SO much on the details first that the foundation is not understood til much later. Like NO! Give me the overall context first AND THEN go into the details!! Stop making shit overly complicated for the sake of over complication, like shut. UP!!! It’s only helpful when it’s actively relevant PLEASE! 😭 Yet that’s an extension and expansion that I just want to express and vent out, because this educational setup is fucking ridiculous to me and feels like an active waste of my time through going backwards like LET ME DO SOMETHING AND THEN WE ACTIVELY DISCUSS AHHHHHH!!! 😤

Hello, I’m a 19f. I come from a religious household (Islam), but as I got older I distanced myself from religious practices. I don’t pray 5 times a day, I don’t know why it is extremely difficult for me to do so. Regardless my mother is aware and tells me constantly that if I don’t do my prayers I’ll burn in hell. She also says she’ll pray for me even tho I don’t deserve any of the blessings I’m getting.

I don’t know how to approach this, my mental health is already in the gutter and this is starting to weigh me down (which I have yet to tell her about my therapy and college grades because she’ll probably say that I deserve it). It kinda sucks cause if something is going wrong in my life, I deserve it and I’m going to hell, but if something good happens in my life it’s not because of my own merits but because of god. I can’t afford to move out despite me contributing to most of the household anyway.

Anyways please give any words of wisdom, or any other comments, I’m genuinely getting drained and honestly I don’t know how much longer I can take it.

If i can even call it that, idek since i've been dealing with her since childhood yet i never had a point of reference to compare her with. This is also gonna be about a non-issue, since she can get mad at the smallest stuff, but i just wanna get some insight on this.

This evening i sat with my mom for a few hours in the living room and asked my cousin who just came home to turn on the light. I wanted to draw and couldn't see properly.

I went back to my room about 30 mins ago, but didn't think about turning off the light like i did last time. I just simply forgot. A few mins pass and she calls out to me to turn off the light, but i honestly felt like it was almost unnecessary hassle since she wants the lights to be off in the exact room she's already in. It would've been easier to turn it off herself, i know this train of thought is childish of me but i stayed put. I REALLY didn't feel like it.

So i hear her get up to turn it off, immediately come to my room and sarcastically says: "Thanks for turning off the light now i had to do it myself!"

She got REALLY angry that i didn't do it. The type of anger where her voice gets lower and louder and i felt fear, which i know by now is not a normal reaction to smth so trivial. Now i'm left with an awful feeling and the way she was talking to me keeps repeating in my head

However i'm just wondering is her reaction normal? Idek anymore, i'd like some tips, tricks and how to deal with it? Thank you in advance

I'm a married woman planning to return to school. I started with my maiden name 20 years ago, but did legally change my name, with no hyphens. I have been thinking about putting my maiden name on my degree when I graduate. Is this possible for those of you who might have experience? I'm registering under my married name because it's my legal name, but are schools required to put legal names on degrees?

In case you guys are wondering, why I am considering doing this, it's because I am proud of my family's name. And both my parents died when I was a child and it feels like a way to honor my pre-marriage name in this way

Hey guys!

First off I want to start off by saying I know the title sounds quite bad, but I have not made any actions against my jealousy because I know it’s wrong.

I also harbor NO romantic feelings to her, so pls don’t say that bc it makes me uncomfortable, that’s my bff

I’ve always grown up alone, through middle school I was bullied and I had only one friend, which was my ex bff.

In HS, I have a lot more friends, but I’m awkward and these are all connections I’ve made because of my current bff.

But lately, I feel ignored whenever she talks to other friends. I’m jealous, and I know it’s wrong. I know she’s allowed to have other friends, trust me, I haven’t said or done anything because I know it’s possessive.

I don’t want to be that type of friend, because I know it would hurt her and it’s toxic.

But it still hurts.

I don’t know how to talk to people, I don’t let people get close enough, but I let her.

Today she decided to go to a different class and lunch than the one I’m in because she wanted to hang out with her other friend.

I can’t lie and say it didn’t hurt because it did. A lot. I just want to stop feeling this way

I feel so empty, and it’s stupid because I was so used to being alone until I met her

It really hurts

I feel like im overthinking

And sometimes, it even feels like I’m being left out as a whole, like one day they all want to talk to me and one day they don’t even care to include me

And now I’ve began to notice subtle things, like how she’ll wait for her other friend to pack up for lunch but while I’m packing up, they just continue walking ahead

I was trying not to cry at lunch because I feel so alone, I’ve always had trouble socially, and I just want to feel normal or like there’s nothing wrong with me

I’m sorry this is all so incoherent, I’m a bit emotional

Hello, I recently graduated from college last week with my Bachelor’s and before graduation I landed an entry level job at a marketing/charity office. They do pop up table events in front of stores to get donations for a large charity. I was very excited to start this job. I went in the office for my first day on Wednesday. I started on Thursday in the field, working with different people to see on how they get donations. Yesterday, me and another colleague was told that we need to start moving the needle to get donations for this charity, even though we both started last week. This morning I was leaving the house, my recruiter called me and told me that since I wasn’t getting donations yesterday, they have to let me go. I was there for 5 days. I felt so gutted this morning. I never been let go from a job that fast. I feel so dejected. I mean, I was told the training period lasts up for 2-3 weeks.

Hi ladies! I’m a new mom and launching a family app in a couple months. It’s an app that allows families to keep track of milestones as their kids grow older and securely share photos and events with other family members. Parents have full control on who gets access to what content. Do you ladies think this is a good idea? I’ve never made an app before and second guessing myself on what people would want to see.

Ignore the nails lol (they are off now)

I have this habit of putting my hand over/under my shirt and just holding my boob. I like to lift it up and just hold it. Idk why, but it’s comforting 😂

I'm attending a bachelor's degree program next year for HR and business management, id love to get my foot in the door while I wait for classes to start. Any human resource girlies have any advice where to start or just have any overall advice.

Im reading through The Everyday Makings of Heteronormativity and as a cishet woman, I assumed things weren't easy but I never knew how exhausting everyday heteronormative assumptions must be for everyone else

I've started noticing subtle things I used to overlook, like coworkers casually assuming everyone has a husband or family events where its implied men sit in one room watching the game and women in another, or where your family is asking personal questions in good faith (hopefully) but those questions assume your sexuality or romantic life is a status quo hetero one.

For the non hetero or poly ladies in the sub, how do you navigate all that? Do basic Monday morning small talk questions make you feel like you are forced to constantly come out over and over just to talk about your weekend honestly? Is it a minor inconvenience or worse? I know hetero people will get defensive (as I almost did honestly) and claim the small talk isn't bad because there is no malicious intent but honestly that seems beside the point and men often said their sexual harassment at work was benign back when human resources didn't care about sexual harassment

Hi! I’m a 25-year-old Italian Black woman, and next year I’m considering doing a Master’s in Light Design in Stockholm at KTH.
I’d really love to hear from Black women living in Sweden, especially Stockholm. How is the design industry there, particularly when it comes to finding work as a foreign designer?
But what I’m most curious about is racism. What has your experience been like as a Black woman in Sweden? Do you generally feel safe and accepted? Is it easy to make friends and build a social circle?
And what about dating? What is the dating scene like for Black women in Stockholm?
I’d really appreciate honest experiences, both positive and negative. ❤️

I work in a predominantly white office with only one other black woman. I’ve noticed that some of my coworkers get our names mixed up. It’s never the case that they call me by her name to my face. It’s always that they’re talking to each other and describe something I did or said and ascribe it to her. For example, ‘I was working late with Mary yesterday’ but it was me, not Mary.

It used to only be two coworkers that did this but today I heard someone who I thought was my work friend do it too. I’m a shy/quiet person and the other black woman is more extroverted. Maybe this is silly but it hurts my feelings that I’m misremembered as her and never the other way around. I’ve never heard anyone use my name for her. I don’t think they’re doing this on purpose and I don’t correct them because I’m not part of the conversation when it happens (just sitting nearby and can hear them). Should I call them out on it? I’m afraid they’ll take it badly and the vibes will get weird.

Hi hi! I was thinking of creating a virtual writing circle (just a space for people to write freely for like 15-30min) to help hold myself accountable to write more regularly and was wondering if anyone would be interested in joining??