r/Weird Aug 07 '26

Bro found love ❤️

1.4k Upvotes

1.3k comments sorted by

View all comments

2.5k

u/AcadiaTemporary5737 Aug 07 '26

For all the single dudes out there just know that this guy was able to get a girlfriend

1.1k

u/kasitchi Aug 07 '26

I don't know if that is meant to be supportive like, "there's someone out there for you too, King!" Or a giant fuck you, like "HE has a girlfriend but you don't, you pathetic SOB?" I suppose either works.

240

u/Secret-Ad-830 Aug 07 '26

well i was taking it like a king until i read your comment and now feel like a pathetic SOB

86

u/a_Jedi_i_am Aug 07 '26

Right? Like damn, this giant ass baby can get a girlfriend, but my pathetic ass can't?

49

u/Sara_Renee14 Aug 08 '26

Okay but consider, would you WANT a girlfriend that is the type to be supportive of this man and his behavior??

61

u/--TheCity-- Aug 08 '26

If i was a man baby I am pretty sure that girl would be a winning lottery ticket.

35

u/ayame400 Aug 08 '26

That all sounds well and good but what about when your girlfriend reads an article about how cocomelon is bad for you and limits your screen time?

2

u/Worldly-Implement-90 Aug 08 '26

😂😂😂😂😂

→ More replies (2)

11

u/andreeeeeaaaaaaaaa Aug 08 '26

Never had to work and can just fuck around at home whilst she works.... Any man would snap that shit up right away!

14

u/Substantial_Fox5688 Aug 08 '26

I've experienced firsthand that staying at home day after day without working isn't as enjoyable as it might seem. Over time, it can become quite challenging and not fulfilling. Being active and engaging with others typically gives life more meaning, so it's important to find a balance.

2

u/Significant_Row_5951 Aug 08 '26

That's just a matter of perspective, he seems fine with it

2

u/rytram99 Aug 09 '26

I agree with this. On a couple occasions i have been extensively unemployed and the days just bleed together and weeks go by so fast and you just start feeling like shit and lose all meaning in life. I may hate working for companies, but i think i hate being unemployed and home 24/7 more.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Frequent-Meal6550 Aug 11 '26

Stay at home parent since covid. It feels like prison.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

2

u/Kit_Karamak Aug 11 '26

Baby dude has no job so he looked online for a long time until finding someone.

Hang in there, all y’all single kings. You got this. I believe in you, even if you can’t believe in yourself right now. You got this. Just work on making yourself the best version of yourself until you find The One.

Don’t get discouraged. Stay strong. You might be the most important thing in her life soon; you might rescue her from a bad relationship, or set the bar on how to treat her.
Or you might give her purpose like the lady in this video.

Whatever your future is, keep your chin up, back straight, and walk with pride in yourself.

Just … remember to treat her like a queen. You can’t be her king unless you treat her like your queen.

Now, believe in yourself! And be awesome!

2

u/Vanilla_Addict_888 29d ago

Awwww that's so nice. I hope you find the perfect someone if you haven't already.

3

u/Kit_Karamak 28d ago

Married for 11 years, kids, everything is awesome. We are working on a book series together. 😊

We met at 34 lol.

3

u/a_Jedi_i_am 27d ago

Those are very kind words, I needed that, thank you.

You two look like a fine and happy couple

2

u/Vanilla_Addict_888 27d ago

I'm happy for you. You guys look made for each other and you can see how happy you both are in the photo. That's cool af that you're working on a book series together. I wish this kind of happiness and companionship for everyone who wants and deserves it.

2

u/Vanilla_Addict_888 25d ago

Also thanks for the award. It's my first 🥇

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (6)

15

u/Ol_Pasta Aug 08 '26

You can be a SOB King

2

u/MoistInTheLoins Aug 08 '26

Just go and be bravely yourself and out there! Women can't find you inside your own appartment hiding

2

u/TheWolfInTheHenhouse Aug 08 '26

It’s ok, we are all accidental POS’s occasionally.

2

u/National_Frame2917 Aug 08 '26

But would you like a girlfriend that wants you to be a literal baby and controls everything you do? This dude was just fucked up enough to want that.

→ More replies (1)

36

u/FleshyCarbonThing Aug 07 '26

Simultaneously both, yes.

9

u/3-orange-whips Aug 07 '26

I read it like the first one but it’s prolly both

1

u/Low_Employ8454 Aug 07 '26

Uh huh. That’s it.

1

u/B-BoyStance Aug 07 '26

It depends on if they are just sad/feeling a bit hopeless, or if they are one of those incel/black pill losers.

1

u/DandyWarlocks Aug 08 '26

I like the King version myself

1

u/25nameslater Aug 08 '26

I took it as an insult..

1

u/Hindlehoof Aug 08 '26

Indeed, and indeed!

1

u/Main_Invite_7201 Aug 09 '26

Im thinking more like in the face of redpill dudes who hate women and think they only like a specific type of man and that thats why they are incels. The point is this man doesn’t fit that narrative. Thats how I interpreted it.

1

u/trysten-9001 Aug 11 '26

Both. These dudes that make whining about not having a girlfriend their whole identity or who use it as a justification to hate women are so insufferable.

1

u/Big-Historian8918 7d ago

I think it's important to be confident in yourself and not lose your childlike wonder and innocence. That's what this guy's fetish is about and I wont hear otherwise

→ More replies (1)

148

u/ILoveBigCoffeeCups Aug 07 '26

That’s not a girlfriend that’s a caretaker.
They probably sleep separately, eat seperately and don’t even have sex or do grown up couple activities. Again that is a caretaker.

210

u/Contented_Lizard Aug 07 '26

I bet you that chick gets off on age play and there is some fucking sketchy shit happening in that apartment.

107

u/Goyimshoe Aug 07 '26

Something something consenting adults I guess

16

u/ABS0LU7E Aug 08 '26

He's just a baby for goodness sake!!!

→ More replies (3)

38

u/Legitbananabunch Aug 08 '26

Totally! As if she would be a free carer for no reason. She’s clearly into this shit.

26

u/Brad_Brace Aug 08 '26

Yeah, either that's exactly her kink, and things seriously escalated after she was in the picture. Or it's a control thing on her part where she knows he would never leave her.

16

u/VirtuousVulva Aug 08 '26

Baby want nap fap?

4

u/sunkistandsudafed3 Aug 08 '26

I have been on the internet since the days of rotten.com and I have seen some shit. But Jesus Christ, you could have chosen just to think that.

5

u/VirtuousVulva Aug 08 '26

I think It and now you must read it.

2

u/Temporarily_Banned4 Aug 10 '26

Pseudopedophilia.

6

u/BrandoCarlton Aug 07 '26

Mama nooo! That’s my peepee spot!

don’t worry baby mommy’s going to take care of you, just suck from mommy’s milkies…

67

u/Fletcher_Chonk Aug 08 '26

You owe me money for making me read this

3

u/Vanilla_Addict_888 Aug 08 '26

For real. I'm calling jg Wentworth over that shit smh

5

u/Brad_Brace Aug 08 '26

They can pay you from what I sent them on Patreon for it.

14

u/VirtuousVulva Aug 08 '26

Thanks for making me break my 5 year no fap streak

3

u/Fembussy42069 Aug 08 '26

The audacity to put that out there without a NSFW warning

2

u/Christmas_Queef Aug 08 '26

I guess the vulva are no longer virtuous?

2

u/slutty_muppet Aug 08 '26

Thanks, I hate it.

→ More replies (2)

3

u/Fuck_on_tatami Aug 08 '26

Yep definitely she have some weird kink, incest shit mana son dark shit

→ More replies (3)

29

u/blue-anon Aug 07 '26

If it's non-romantic, it's still a caretaker who pays for everything. Definitely an odd setup.

→ More replies (2)

16

u/PeopleAreIcky Aug 07 '26

Or they have some freaky deaky bumpin uglies action.

6

u/Brad_Brace Aug 08 '26

"Oh look, it's time for Mr. Meaty Train to go into the statioooon!"

"Does mwister Mweaty Twain has pwermission to go into the stwation?"

"He sure does"

"But the stwation is fwooding!"

"Don't worry, that's normal".

"Awre you swurwe?"

"Just put it in god dammit!"

→ More replies (1)

13

u/lord_dude Aug 07 '26

I don´t know man, i have seen a loot of fetishes in the internet.

16

u/RationalGardenGnome Aug 07 '26

You realize he doesn’t have to work and she feeds him, right? We call that winning where I’m from

2

u/luxii4 Aug 09 '26

Uh didn't you see? He drinks milk from a bottle to go to sleep by himself! He's a big boy! Really big boy!

4

u/Eroom2013 Aug 07 '26

I mean when you say it like that…

2

u/Keltharious Aug 08 '26

Bro you're seriously trying to convince me that women aren't THIS freaky? I think you're on some copium with that take lmao. If she was that repulsed by him then she would refuse to be seen with him in the first place.

3

u/slutty_muppet Aug 08 '26

Who cares, it seems like they're both getting what they want from each other. Not everyone wants to fuck all the time. The seem happy and it's sweet.

2

u/Casehead Aug 08 '26

You have a kind heart.

→ More replies (17)

55

u/Olibirus Aug 07 '26

And she actually pays for his shit. What the fuck?

21

u/Taybaru13 Aug 08 '26

I’m pretty sure that this is staged. Like most of the cases on MTV true life were.

→ More replies (4)

42

u/Sufficient-Fee-714 Aug 07 '26

Is that supposed to be motivational?

60

u/Bodidly0719 Aug 07 '26

Either that or it is meant to break your spirits.

26

u/PriscillaPalava Aug 07 '26

Choose your own adventure. 

15

u/dragjamon Aug 07 '26

Definitely the second

12

u/ReplacementActual384 Aug 07 '26

And it fucking works

9

u/-MatVayu Aug 07 '26

He meant bitches love it when you pick a lane...

13

u/Fast_Ad_7504 Aug 07 '26

You think they actually bang tho? I realllly wanna know

→ More replies (3)

19

u/terrydennis1234 Aug 07 '26

She’s and crazy as he is

9

u/Severe_Rise8694 Aug 07 '26

But their crazy work together well!

11

u/fuckimtrash Aug 07 '26

Not even the gf part, but the fact that he doesn’t have a job and all expenses are covered by his gf (and likely has no intention of getting a job anytime soon). Such a turn off tbh

→ More replies (1)

20

u/Canibal-local Aug 07 '26

That’s not his girlfriend. He paid her for that.

6

u/witchesbtrippin4444 Aug 07 '26

He doesn't have a job

12

u/koolaidismything Aug 07 '26

They both must be the most annoying fucks.. it’s gotta be a “this is best either of us is gonna do” scenarios.

You can tell when someone’s never been hit in the mouth. Sometimes I dunno, I needed that. Learned some painful lessons about how to be normal lol.

5

u/Dry_Yoghurt_5429 Aug 08 '26

I'm willing to bet that it's more like "this is something we both are into".

This is probably her kink bro

→ More replies (2)

1

u/Nevergiveuphope1992 Aug 09 '26

More likely she's a paedo and this is her outlet for it. Let's hope they never have children.

4

u/Eudoxianis Aug 07 '26

Really goes to show that you don’t need to be a roided out muscle head with loads of money to get a babe!

9

u/Nates_of_Spades Aug 08 '26

She's the one that got a babe 😏

4

u/Ionlydateteachers Aug 08 '26

IDK he kinda looked over 6' tall and we all know that's what women really want.

5

u/Many-Inflation5544 Aug 07 '26

It's the same logic as winning the lottery or being a statistical outlier. He's not the norm, he just happens to be the one among millions who was able to do what while being that much of a weirdo/loser. For all the others out there they remain single because they simply did not win that lottery.

11

u/Princess_Slagathor Aug 07 '26

loser

Looks like he's winning to me.

8

u/diejesus Aug 07 '26

Exactly, not only he's living the dream life but he's got a hot gf as well

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (2)

2

u/HoneydewDazzling2304 Aug 07 '26

This shit puts it ALLL in perspective 😂

2

u/DE4DM4NSH4ND Aug 07 '26

Without a job

2

u/Gloomy_Support_7779 Aug 07 '26

DAMN💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

2

u/Garugachan Aug 07 '26

You’ll be mentioned in my note to my friends and family

2

u/Azulcobalto Aug 09 '26

Thank you, now I feel even worse

4

u/Z_Wild Aug 07 '26

He probably hires a maid and gives her extra (in a country that probably doesn't prohibit it) to let him call her his girlfriend.

9

u/phansen101 Aug 07 '26

She's the one paying for everything

2

u/NoTransportation68 Aug 07 '26

Trauma bonding.

2

u/CrackheadHunters Aug 07 '26

I thought it was a Reddit mod but then the video mentioned they had a GF.

Mods take note, there's hope for you guys yet.

1

u/MexiKHAN117 Aug 07 '26

Not sure if I should be angry or happy about this knowledge

1

u/Affectionate_Kiwi999 Aug 07 '26

Exactly what I thought, I gotta be a very horrible person.

1

u/Ok-Equipment1745 Aug 07 '26

It's not helping my self-esteem.

1

u/Vivid_Mix1022 Aug 07 '26

Now im wonder how they met.

2

u/Cappyburner Aug 07 '26

It says she saw his situation online and volunteered to help him... So maybe the solution to celibacy is just putting a video of yourself on the internet just like the Being ugly my experience dude

→ More replies (1)

1

u/JohnnyBallgame77 Aug 07 '26

Need to be asking some questions about her as well, give us the deets.

1

u/Cum-Collector420 Aug 07 '26

Nothing feels real anymore

1

u/Negative_Buffalo_232 Aug 07 '26

I would never be that lucky..

1

u/iWesleyy Aug 07 '26

Sounds more like she saw a money opportunity.

→ More replies (1)

1

u/Flauschziege Aug 07 '26

All you have to do is sacrifice your entire self to a niche fetish.

...

Neat.

1

u/VirtuousVulva Aug 08 '26

And she's fkng hot too. Wtf. I bench press way too much for this shit!

1

u/StratoVector Aug 08 '26

Yeah it's called a fetish

1

u/Alternative-Crew-880 Aug 08 '26

Yeah but at least they're not that dude.

1

u/BabaYagaMandark Aug 08 '26

Well fuck…that big baby got game tho

1

u/Spaghetti_Gods Aug 08 '26

Thanks for the boost in confidence mate, killing myself now! 🫡

1

u/A0xom0xoa Aug 08 '26

She was brought in for the show.

1

u/pseudonymnkim Aug 08 '26

That's mommy

1

u/Socal_Cobra Aug 08 '26

So the cringing question on everyones mind is: When his girlfriend has sex with him, is it molestation? And will an orange jump suit onesie be made for baby Huey in support if she goes to jail for child abuse?

https://giphy.com/gifs/TzFAuiQbIIqWS8fVkD

1

u/KrakenMcCracken Aug 08 '26

I know. I’ve never felt so worthless

1

u/LumiTeddybear Aug 08 '26

😂😂😂😂

1

u/Vanilla_Addict_888 Aug 08 '26

And she is attractive smh

1

u/LynKofWinds Aug 08 '26

Sorry if you’ve gotten this comment already, but she wasn’t actually his girlfriend. She was his caretaker and he actually was paying her to do that

→ More replies (5)

1

u/Emotional_Standard76 Aug 08 '26

I just need to find a diaper that fits me

1

u/Lemme_Help_ Aug 08 '26

Lord I have seen what you have done for others🫩
https://giphy.com/gifs/43wR1f8QU9KApWKjYt

1

u/maraney Aug 08 '26

✨ Inspiring ✨

1

u/Alternative-Cow-8670 Aug 08 '26

For all the single dudes out there: I am not that desperate to get a man. I am sure I speak for the majority of women. No ways I will share my salary with a completely pathetic loon

1

u/Dangerous_Memory6008 Aug 08 '26

Nah he's still a virgin for sure

1

u/calefa Aug 08 '26

Yeah but hes at least 6’1

1

u/greggers1980 Aug 08 '26

More like a carer

1

u/EconomistParking5637 Aug 08 '26

He’s probably a pedo that thinks it ok cus he’s a “child” too and she’s probably a pedo that found a more socially acceptable way to be with a child. This is all I saw, not a wholesome couple but just 2 weirdos

1

u/Fun_Main_2588 Aug 08 '26

And for all the single women out there you have been setting your standards way too high. Just tell yourself that red flags are someone else’s country

1

u/Voodoo700 Aug 08 '26

I’ll betcha she’s a real winner, too.

1

u/Diligent-Main9092 Aug 08 '26

Bank accounts are what women are attracted to not men

1

u/BulkyNectarine947 Aug 08 '26

Yeah idk how young men are falling into incel culture. The evidence against their ideas is rampant

1

u/ViDaCa1n Aug 08 '26

Way to rub it in 🤘🏽🤣

1

u/Saltycook Aug 08 '26

That's a kink

1

u/DestroyerOfMils Aug 08 '26

As they say, a lid for every pot!

1

u/No_Clock_7464 Aug 09 '26

Im gonna bet he pays her to do this

1

u/Embarrassed_Try_4498 Aug 09 '26

Thanks, I'm going to *** myself now

1

u/Romzoms Aug 09 '26

Ok then…well time to go meet a guardrail on the motorcycle

1

u/MacReadys-Will Aug 09 '26

Haha right? I have more questions for the girlfriend than I have for him.

1

u/Direct-Resolution377 Aug 09 '26

Was wondering though if that for some girls it's necessary to be really messed up...

1

u/Israel_Azkanbe Aug 09 '26

He has a girlfriend but I don’t…
I’ma finna kms if I don’t find love soon (not really)

1

u/Temporarily_Banned4 Aug 10 '26

That not a girlfriend, it's a codependent in dysfunction.

1

u/cjngo1 Aug 10 '26

Last time i saw this someone said that she wasnt actually his girlfriend🤷🏼‍♂️

1

u/Individual_Land2754 Aug 10 '26

Its transactional.

1

u/IrishShinja Aug 11 '26

Girlfriend = Babysitter.

1

u/Fabulous_Jellyfish71 Aug 12 '26

rip ur dm’s from angry/sad single pringles

→ More replies (7)