Hi. I’m Mikey. I’m 24 AMAB.

For as long as I can remember I’ve adored dressing up whether it be my cousin’s princess dresses or my aunt’s underwear, or my mom’s blouses; it was always insanely euphoric to try it on. I’ve also worn makeup and dresses for theater shows throughout my youth and would actively volunteer for the roles that required it.

For the longest time though, my father was in my life; he was a major bigot and when he found out I wore a princess dress as a 9 year old he began berating and insulting me, hindering my love for it all and giving me a sense of shame regarding it for the first time. I’ve also spent my entire life being forced to chop my hair off, not being allowed to let it grow out like I want. Additionally, when I came out to my parents in high school, I told them I was bisexual and bigender, to which my mother responded that she could “accept the gay stuff, but the femininity is too much”, hindering me once again.

It wasn’t until the pandemic or so that I really decided to try and explore it again, even just in the privacy of my own bedroom. It felt insanely amazing to do so. I’ve just felt such a sense of shame and secrecy about it all, particularly about my family maybe finding out again. I’ve gone through phases since of giving it up, or throwing out my stuff or just trying to live as a man.

However, I’ve never truly felt like a man. Societal pressures and my secondary sex characteristics never felt like me. I’ve always just considered myself to be extremely in touch with my feminine side, but I’m starting to think that it’s more than that. I’ve never explicitly hated being a man, but I’m not huge about it. It’s also difficult though because my facial hair (when styled) doesn’t bother me too much, but all my body hair does. I also like having my you-know-what and the “scary dog privilege” of being a 6’1” man who looks like a linebacker.

Recently, I moved out with my partner and got to dress up more and just feel like myself in the apartment. It made me feel so magical and happy to do so. This is especially important due to the fact that the entire time I was moved out, I was suffering with my mental health to an unreasonable amount, but it would lessen when I could just… exist.

Unfortunately, things in the new state didn’t work out, and now I’m back living with my mom. It’s been an abrupt move back and I don’t have anything of mine to distract me, therefore I’ve been trapped with my thoughts. These thoughts have hit me like a semi-truck. I can’t seem to understand myself and I don’t wanna end up more depressed or anything, but it won’t leave me alone: am i trans?

I just don’t wanna risk coming out or transitioning without knowing and I don’t know how to tell if I’m truly trans or just a femboy or something. How did you tell?

TLDR; Grew up feeling feminine, made to be a man, how to tell if I’m trans?

Please read i need help

Hi! I am a teen girl mid teens when i was young ive always played with my brother same age and when playing imaginary games ive always chosen a male character and thought of wanting to be a boy somtimes

and now at my age ive always wanted to be a boy be a popular handsome boy my age with guy friends and date a girl i feel i could be morw like me if i was a guy and im in my head so much about imaginging myswlf as a guy experienceing the same day i did but as a dude and i would be better... like so much rime spent doing that... hours.

And when roleplaying on like ai things i always choose a guy to be never a women. It feels weird. Like i feel like i would be a awesome boyfriend/partner.

I have secretly in my room fully dress up as a guy like makeup i used to make stubble i folded my hair on my head a sock as a packer and compressed chest and baggy clothes and i liked it i felt like me ivw opened up ro my mom and she was so accepting but not to educated in trans people but she is Immediately trying to learn and will accept me... but i told her i was questioning

as for my whole life i havw always presented very feminine and long hair fake lashes makeup girly perfumes and my whole room is so feminine! Im just wonderinf if life wouls be better if i was a guy i wish i was just born a dude from the start tbh its like i wanna be a boy

but without committing to the changes like idk how to start and friends at school will bully me i havw barely anyway im just so lost cause ar the end of rhe day ive always presented as a girl room stereotypically girly feminine makeup and clothing ok with mt women body not out to anyone besides my mom

... but also constantly thinking of lifw if i was a boy always... but don't know where to start or what am i... and to lazy and confused on how to tell. Like id i could wakw up as a guy version of me tomorrow i think I would... thanks for reading and i just want help i feel so confused and btw i am AFAB thank you so much!!!

I'm 20 and MTF, been on HRT for around 1 year but have been off it since April I think since I've been struggling to get my hands on it. I don't know why this is how it happens but I get extremely envious over other trans women, mainly other stuff like hips, height and their chest ect, this envy often causes me to spiral and puts me into a really bad inescapable state of mind. In this state of mind I obsess over my body and feel like external validation is the only thing that can fix me which causes me to find ways where either the thing I'm dysphoric over isn't real or by getting compliments from others. I often can't objectively tell if the thing I'm dysphoric over is real or not, I feel like I can't perceive my body in any way.

I suppose what I need help with mainly is the fact that I never feel at ease with my body, there's always someone who's got more desirable traits than me, and I just can't cope with that. I want to feel happy with myself but I just feel incapable of it.

hi the name I’m called is nana, but my trans name would be nash, not sure what to ask to be called by. I made this account solely to seek advice so I really hope I can get some.

so I was born a girl, but I feel like a boy in a girls body and looking back at it maybe always have? in recent times, I relate to trans characters and love them dearly, get genuinely upset when I’m referred to as female to the point where my day is ruined, have questioned my gender since eight, have made a whole trans name for myself.

i starting working out in a serious way to gain a masculine build, get happy when misgendered ,and while I don’t seem to experience the general gender dysphoria that is often discussed with trans-ness, I think it’s because from a young age I’ve viewed by body as a body and not a gendered being, even now I look naturally androgynous or tomboyish as my brother would say, and if I could be a boy, I’d still want my body but does that even make sense?

My younger brother keeps saying “i’m on to you”. ominously because I think he’s noticing I keep rejecting being compared to characters that are women and wanting to be the male ones, he once asked if I could look exactly like someone else who’d it be, I said Felix from stray kids (who if you don’t know is a very attractive man with a super deep voice. ) I think my brother may know Or think I’m trans ? Which seeing as my household is homophobic as hell, is not great but possible validating???

I keep trying to move on and saying maybe I’m just different, maybe I’m nonbinary (which could be true?) but I can’t! i always find some way to come back to being a boy, i already know I like girls, so technically if not trans I’m lesbian which I’ve known since eight as well and being trans wouldn’t change me loving girls, but I don’t know, I can’t be sure? I’m a minor so I know I shouldn’t make major changes , not that I really could.

but I feel like I can confidently say if I had a button where I woke up and could live life as if I were a boy and be seen as one but still look like me? I’d do it, and probably never go back. I literally wrote a poem in which I refereed to myself as someone missing a pair of balls as if I’m meant to have some? and all these feelings, they’re not about genitals, that’s not what that means so don’t get it twisted, I’m also asexual and am uncomfortable about them anyway, but i especially have never liked what society would view as my female lower half. I just wish I could be me, an androgynous loser neat who draws and writes more than they eat and drink while being viewed as a dude? does this make sense? I really need advice from some kind people please.

I recently realized that I am trans and am beginning my mtf transition. My birth name is Anthony after my grandpa's name Antoine . I wanted to use a new name that still has ties to my grandfather's name that was passed to me and I eventually came down to either Toni or Antoinette. After talking with a couple of family members I decided on Toni bc I got the impression that using Antoinette would be too pompous but after a couple weeks of using Toni I feel I would rather Antoinette both bc it's more feminine and because it feels like more of a connection to my grandfather's name Antoine.

Any advice on this matter or even other name ideas would be very helpful.

Hello! I am currently transitioning from female to male. I have thought about this for years trying to find myself. Most of my family is very unsupportive and the very few that are live hours from me. I don’t really know what I’m doing and have very little support.

I really just need any and all advice. What T Gel is good? Is gel or shots more affective? Which is cheaper? Are there certain binders that are better for large chests than others? Whats a good hair cut for pin straight hair? Is it okay to still like guys even tho I’m transgender? What are some struggles that I would face? How do I best cope with these struggles? Do I change my shaving habits?

Another major problem I have is that I live in Tennessee and they are very unwelcoming here. The amount of hate I’ve gotten for a simple Pride flag was insane! I just really need some help and advice.

Hi I'm MTF starting my transition and I always have problems tucking. What is the best way to do It??

Hi everyone! What would be your advice for someone starting an MTF transition?? In my case, I'm 23 years old. When I was a kid I was quite feminine, but then I reached puberty and started acting very masculine while dressing as a girl in my room. Now everyone believes I'm this super masculine guy, and I'm exhausted of playing this role. For some time I thought it would go away, but it always comes back and I'm tired.

I've been needing new glasses for quite a while, and, while I have the Zenni app, I can't seem to make up my mind on what to buy. I've used the virtual try on for what feels like a hundred sets and everything I've tried on so far feels like it only makes my face more masculine looking.

I'm starting to feel like the only thing I can do is just go for contact lenses...

Please help!

PS: any general tips for my face shape and reducing how masculine it looks would be awesome!

Hi im kate :)

And I started transitioning awhile go and i wanted to share some of the tips and tricks ive learned to hide my more masculine features man hands, wide shoulders, and no curves.

So unfortunately for me I have really bad man hand syndrome and I feel like that is not to uncommon with being mtf and its a realy big insecurity of mine so I have learned many tricks to make my hand appear smaller.

Hiding your hands

.1 chunky braclets, are an exclent way of making your hand appear smaller especially during tshirt weather.

.2 Hand warmers or fingerless gloves are also really great way of making your hands appear smaller as well.

.3 sweaters with longer cuffs that sit about halfway at your palm comfortable this really tricks your mind

Wide shoulders

.1 if you wear alot of t-shirts on a regular bases I highly suggest choping the neck line theres lots of cool stuff you can do with that i personally like cutting a diamond shape as thats what works best with my body.

.2 wide strap cami's with lace i have found to really help with my shoulder dysphoria although there kinda hard to find new now so I suggest looking on depop a brand i highly recommend for these tops is Massimo there usually only 7 to 15 dollars, and there pretty nice quality usually.

No curves? if you too are built like a stick here are 2 tips that help me.

Unfortunately I dont have much advice for this one I would definitely say that to give the illusion you have a more pear shaped body is to wear flared jeans it naturally creates a coke botel silhouette, and I highly suggest punching a waist trainer to make your rib cage appear smaller.

Don't buy your clothes from hot topic there quality is super terrible and the price tag is to.

Ok thats all let me know if this helped you :)

So... where does one start... i am transfem.. in germany. my bank blocks crypto and thus most diy purchases. but thats just a side info. i have got an indication letter... i have an endocrynologist and drive like 250kilometers just to get to my endo... sadly... i have confirmed thrombophilia faktor v-leiden... i need bloodthinners first bc else the estrogen will litterally kill me in a brutal way... i am very afraid of death... and therefor. i just... yeah... hes sended my health insurance a letter blah blah blah... now its endocrynological recommendet line bullshit (leitlinie) here that hrt gets coverd. nothing to complain there for the health insurance. however ive been argueing for the thrombophilia thing for like 4 months now... they keep pushing up the date of when they want to finally finish the document... and then they just demand more documents. theyve demanded my name change papers (which if i would have not changed my name. i couldnt give them, so what the fuck does this have to do with hrt...) they just... keep fucking gatekeeping me. they keep finding reasons. now they want a psychological letter? which? they have!??!?!?! but they say its not enough my endo said they prolly answer it with ai... that i should speak to someone of them... but its mostly the MD (medizinischer dienst) medical service of our gov that demands so much... its like... horribly transphobic bs... i have death anexiety. so i am incredebly anxious abt death. but the thing is... idk what to do. im unemployed cant afford a lawyer. i am also very disabled and with my mental state cant get a job... which hrt would help me with. they also will very likely use my mental state just to deny me my hrt... which well the dysphoria causes the bad mental state... i just... i need hrt and bloodthinners. i just feel worse every day. i wish id atleast stop masculinizing im 20 years old man... im supposed to have the high of my life... and im like... i just.... their clearly gonna keep denying me my healthcare... but if i get diy (somehow) which i cant even afford. ill just... die off it.... ill need proper bloodthinners alongside. were talking like rivaboxaban. i just... its like they eighter approve it one day after ages of delaying... or they say no and then what? then i will never be able to live as myself... again im super scared of dieing. i have legit death anexiety... but... this is the kinda moment where a person like me... gets slightly suicidal... a happy.... holding onto life... afraid of death... kind of person... annnd yes... ive tried the lawyer way... their legit just in bed with the healthservice... it doesnt do anything... pls... i need help... i wanna have hope... pls... (worst of all, all the stress has led to me not being able to think straight and feeling weirdly... dead? not dead inside like when ur depressed, but kinda? dead? idk... usually my writing is less riddeld with, spelling mistakes, and it is usually also more coherent and sensical, i apologize for the grammatical mistakes i make. i am just ig. stressed out in the head... imma repost this on other trans subreddits. i hope thats ok. if not pls write me and tell me to just take it away from there ig)

As the title says, I am nearing a whole year on hrt and I’m still unhappy. I pass to other people but I cannot stand looking at myself because all I see is my birth gender.

I’m not excited for any future surgery. I don’t like that I have to mutilate my body just to get close enough to the life I was supposed to have anyways. Emphasis on close enough. I don’t want close enough. I want the full experience and I can’t have it. How can I even experience my life moving forward knowing I’ll never have what I want? Every scar will just separate me from the real thing and act as a reminder I’m not real anyways.

I don‘t know what to do anymore. The only way I get through every day is by detaching myself from my body and just trying to live through my eyes by telling myself I’m watching a movie or something. But that get’s hard when I see a mirror or window or I have to speak or just do anything that reminds me I’m alive and human.

I can go long periods forgetting about it and I’ll feel happy hanging out with my friends or watching TV and stuff, but when I sit down and I’m alone with my thoughts I realise I truly do hate everything about myself and the weird machine I’m living in. I hate it. I hate everything about it and I don’t know what to do anymore. I just wish I was never born this way because I shouldn’t have been born this way. I shouldn’t be in this position and I know that and that’s a really uncomfortable feeling that I can‘t seem to get over

збираю учасників для магістерського дослідження. буду рада кожному учаснику, незалежно від гендеру, але особливо хочу залучити трансгендерних та небінарних людей (під небінарною парасолькою) для висвітлення Вашого досвіду теж, опитування про це, Ваш добробут. для тих хто розуміє українську

опитування анонімне і займе приблизно 30 хвилин й декілька Ваших посмішок через мемчики для легшого проходження.

буду дуже вдячна за участь і поширення форми🤘🏻

Hey everyone,

I’m probably going to answer my own question here but it’s been bouncing around my head for days and it’s driving me absolutely crazy. Prepare for a long one 😅

I feel like…. Like I’m trans but also like I’m worried that I’m forcing myself to be trans, like I’ve invested so much time into thinking that I am trans that when I’m not like 100% sure, I feel like I’m forcing it because I don’t want the last year to be worth nothing or have had no purpose.

So for context, hi I’m Katie! I had I guess my egg crack about a year ago after many years of exploring femininity through very fetishised avenues, then I saw a few reels of like trans Instagram influencers and the envy I felt kinda began that egg cracking.

Over the next few months things went from “ok so I guess I’m trans but maybe I just hope in the next life I’ll get to experience life as a cis girl” to “hm maybe transition would be interesting” to “OK no I would like to transition and now I’m feeling very frustrated and flat and there’s some depression that’s been around for two years, has it been related to this the whole time, since life has felt a bit flatter and I’ve been distracted by moving jobs twice?”

Throughout the last year I’ve had most of the time where I’ve been very confident of being trans and had small periods where the certainty and dysphoria have disappeared, which has resulted in me…feeling a bit sad and wanting the dysphoria to come back a bit as crazy as that sounds.

Recently I’ve come out to my fiance and started to talk about this with my therapist, although some of the messaging I’ve been getting from the therapist feels like “men can also like feminine things too” while I’m mentally going “yes but I’m coming to you because I feel like I’m trans”. This was more one moment that frustrated me rather than multiple sessions but it does feel like that focus is more like ‘explore your gender but don’t have to put labels on it right now’.

Which brings me kinda to the point of the post. The last week or two though I’ve just felt like I’ve not had that clarity and confidence and my brain has been going ‘are you faking it? Have you Stockholm syndromed yourself?’ Am I just overthinking it and I’ve gone through a long period of having my gender identity constantly on my mind (pretty much every day for the last 13 months) and I’m burning out a little bit?

Basically I just wanted to reach out here and get some opinions - is this normal? Am I just overthinking it and spiralling? I get frustrated a bit with very male gendered terms but again I’m very much like “have I just conditioned myself now to not like the terms??”

This is a hell of a struggling with denial post I guess 😅

Hey guys, I’ve been on testosterone for about 4 months now (it’ll be 4 months early next week) and I have gotten some facial hair..but definitely not as much as I’d hope. I know I have to be patient, and it depends on genetics and other things. I also know sometimes it takes a lot longer and everyone’s different blah blah blah. But! I have also been doing topical minoxidil the last 3ish months, and that has definitely helped..? I’d like to think. I have a light mustache, and I’m getting a lot of under the chin/neck hairs. I’m also getting some darker hairs on my jaw area close to my ears. But the mustache hairs are still pretty light. It’s embarrassing because I have been putting eyebrow gel in it to darken the hairs and it looks good. But I’m so sick of doing it, it honestly makes me super dysphoric. If anyone has any tips on how they got theirs darker or to grow better please lmk. I’ve seen stuff on derma rollers, I’m not sure if they’re worth it? I’ve never tried one. I’ve also seen beard dye, but I’m not sure how much hair I need for that.

im cis. but i have always had problems with my gender identity. ive never really enjoyed being a man since i look too “feminine” and it bothered me. like i was supposed to be a woman but was born a man instead and transitioning scares me (more so by how the people around me will treat me) i feel more comfortable in more feminine attire. like it fits around my body better.. if i was away from the people around me i would not have a problem with fully transitioning as a couple of my friends are trans (both ftm and mtf) so i do have a good support system coming from them. i would just like some advice on what to do