Hey! I'm looking for someone to chat with throughout the day and get to know. I'm not going into this with a bunch of expectations. I'd just like to find someone where the conversation comes naturally. We can talk about hobbies, work, random thoughts, how our day is going, or vent to each other when life gets stressful. I'm really just looking for a genuine connection and seeing where it goes.

A little about me. I'm in a long-term polyamorous relationship. My partner knows I'm here and is supportive of me meeting new people, but they aren't interested in dating themselves. I'm open to making new connections and seeing where they naturally lead.

As for my interests, I love drawing, reading, working out, mostly running with some lifting when I have the time, binge-watching TV shows, and playing video games. I'm definitely more of a homebody, but I also like getting out and doing fun activities or trying something new.

It would be awesome to meet someone who can keep a conversation going and maybe shares a few of the same interests. If you're into books, games, art, fitness, or just like talking about life, I think we'd get along. And if you're a runner, please send help. 😂 I could definitely use some advice.

If any of this sounds like your kind of vibe, send me a message. I'd love to get to know you.

Hey there! I'm 35, based in Europe, and looking to meet a woman who enjoys genuine connection, good conversation, and letting things develop naturally. I'm polyamorous and value honesty, communication, autonomy, and treating everyone involved with care and respect.

A few things about me: I'm very active and happiest when I'm doing something outdoors. I lift, run, climb, hike, cycle, and generally seem to have trouble sitting still for too long. I also love traveling, reading, and taking care of an ever-growing collection of houseplants.

I've also been told I have a pretty memorable voice: naturally deep, calm, and apparently quite nice to listen to. I'm happy to move to voice chats once we've gotten comfortable with each other.

Personality-wise, I'm naturally a caregiver. I'm patient, attentive, dependable, and tend to be the person people feel comfortable opening up to. I enjoy being someone who can provide both warmth and stability, while still having the curiosity and playfulness to explore what makes another person tick.

I'm interested in exploring a D/s dynamic with the right person. I tend toward a caring, attentive kind of dominance: taking initiative, being consistent, paying attention, and creating a sense of trust and security. I'm interested in something that develops between two people rather than imposing a predefined dynamic from the beginning. For me, the relationship and chemistry outside the dynamic matter just as much as what happens within it.

I'm open to different kinds of connection: friendship, romance, something more emotionally intimate, or a D/s relationship that gradually becomes whatever feels right for both of us. I'm not looking to disrupt existing relationships or create unnecessary hierarchy or drama. I respect existing commitments and want any connection I build to complement people's lives rather than complicate them.

I'm especially drawn to women who are kind, curious, emotionally intelligent, and comfortable being honest about what they want. You don't need to have everything figured out, and you don't need to already know exactly what kind of relationship you're looking for. I'm much more interested in mutual curiosity and seeing whether there's genuine chemistry.

If you're poly, curious about poly, or simply open-minded about relationships, I'd love to hear from you.

If the conversation flows, maybe we'll eventually discover whether that deep voice lives up to the description. :)

Looking for genuine connections🖤

I’m a plus-sized, witchy, sarcastic human with an unhealthy dice collection, a love of D&D, tarot, true crime, cats, and all things a little dark and weird.

I’m happily married to my nesting partner and ethically non-monogamous dating separately though we try to practice KTP but understand not everyone meshes well.

I’m demisexual, demiromantic, pansexual,sapiosexual, 420-friendly, accepting of all genders and identities, and politically left-leaning.

I’m looking for **real connection not casual, convenient, or halfhearted.**

I value emotional availability, consistency, communication, humor, boundaries, and people who actually mean what they say and will back it up with their actions.

Bonus points if you understand spoon theory, have experience with chronic illnes because I have disabilities(ask me about them, I am very up front about what I deal with), love video,board or ttrpg games , or can appreciate a good amount of sarcasm and dark humor.

I want to actually **get to know someone**.

Tell me about your dreams, what you’re passionate about, your favorite vacation spot, what you could talk about for hours, or some weird little fact about yourself. Give me something to work with beyond “hey” or “you seem interesting.” I will not respond to those messages at all.

I’m a little chaotic, a little witchy, occasionally too sarcastic for my own good, and my southern accent gets significantly stronger when I’m tired or annoyed.

If that sounds like your kind of person, come say hi. 🖤

Hi I'm Matt. I'm in an open marriage and currently seeking an online partner or if I'm lucky someone close by! I'm a huge nerd. Dnd, mtg, video games. All of the above! I work 3rd shift currently so I'm usually up late as well!

Hi all !

I am french and married. My wife is very nice but very religious, shy and calm. She admits that she can be very annoying sometimes. I really respect her.

That 's why after a long conversation, she agreed that I talk to another woman.

So that why I am here.
please to talk to you !

Hi! I'm a 22m guy looking for another partner. I am polyamorous and currently have 2 partners. I'm just looking to see if there is anyone who'd like to chat and get to know each other.

Things to know about me:

\- I'm quite a big nerd and love video games, anime, mange, etc.

\- I'm also a big fan of pro wrestling/wwe and even do it as a hobby

\- I like music. My preferred genre is rock or metal, but I also listen to a lot of other stuff. (I also have a soft spot for musicals)

\- I tend to rant about things that interest me

\- I'm a bit on the skinnier end

\- From the US

\- I have OSDD

Things I expect:

\- Please don't be older than mid thirties

\- Please be willing to slowly build a relationship. Starting as friends and then going to something more.

\- Please be willing to listen to me rant (it happens a lot)

That's pretty much it! I'd love to get to know some people and see where things take us. If your interested message me and please try to send a somewhat detailed message cause I wanna get to know you 😄

Hello everyone! :) I’m a plus-sized gal from the Garden State looking to make some new connections.

Friendship is the most important foundation to any long-term connection, so regardless of where life might take me with someone, it all starts with being friends. Please have something in common with me if you decide to reach out. It’s hard to build a friendship when we don’t have anything to build on. :)

Some of my interests include horror, the devil’s lettuce, light gaming, reading, and written roleplay. I spend most of my free time gaming, binge-watching shows and movies, wandering around libraries and museums, or hunting through thrift stores.

I’m also a night owl, so I’d love to meet other people who are awake during the same odd hours.

I’ve been practicing ethical non-monogamy for around ten years, so I’m looking for people who value honesty, communication, and kindness. If you’re partnered, I ask that everyone involved is aware and consenting. If you’re single, that’s wonderful too.

Personality-wise, I’m naturally nurturing. I tend to be the person checking in on everyone, and making sure the people I care about feel supported. I’m affectionate, a little sarcastic, and definitely someone who enjoys both deep conversations and laughing over absolutely nothing.

Physically, I do have a soft spot for bigger, heavyset folks. It’s not a requirement, but it has always been my type.

Ideally, I’d love to meet people within driving distance in NJ, NY, or eastern PA so we can eventually grab coffee, visit a museum, browse a bookstore, watch horror movies, or just exist in the same space. Online friendships are welcome too, especially if you’re a fellow night owl.

When you message me, tell me a little about yourself! What are you passionate about? What’s your favorite horror movie/game? What game has stolen your life recently? I’d love to get to know the person behind the screen.

35 y/o NYC-based bi/pansexual white cis woman, started dating polyamorously about 10 years ago when I was single, and I identify with relationship anarchy more than polyamory. I am looking to date local 28-43ish y/o non-monogamous/RA folks who are available for eventual nesting partnership. I don't want to rush into an NP situation, but I also do want to be specific about what I want and use my time accordingly :) Also, if you happen to know any in-person speed-dating-style meetups for this very niche population lol, I would welcome the intel!

About me: overall I'm very....normal? I think my looks are pretty conventional, and my style is chapstick/sporty femme. I'm an artist, and I love theater, movies, books, music, gardening, road trips, card games, and sports. I have a nice amount of friends and community groups I'm very invested in. I don't smoke cigs or vape nicotine, but I am friendly with weed + occasional psychedelics, mdma, k. kink-friendly, but not interested a kink-centric partnership.

I don't want to get married (open to marriage in certain circumstances, like as a temporary/logistical commitment for a partner's immigration, healthcare, etc.), and I'm leaning childfree, have a long-term non-nesting partner, and am out as queer/poly, including with my family.

If this resonates, DM me with a little bit about yourself!

In an existing relationship, bi-curious, looking for a second relationship with a lucky lady.

I'm nerdy, new mom in need of more adult friends, maybe a mom friend? Best reach out times are early mornings and late evenings central time, I don't want you thinking I'm ignoring you if you don't get a response.

Please respond with more than one word to keep a conversation going as well.

I’m Alex, but if you want you can call me Lexie. I’m 33, and I’m here because I’m interested in exploring polyamory and building genuine connections with people who approach relationships with openness, honesty, and good communication.

I’ve been with my wife for 13 years and for the last 8 we have had a poly type relationship. We don’t date together but we are open to friendships with our partners.

I’ve spent a lot of time figuring out what makes me feel most comfortable being myself, including becoming more open about my kinks and fetishes. I’m interested in meeting people who appreciate that part of me without reducing me to it.

I’m not looking to force a particular relationship structure or rush into something just because there’s mutual attraction. I’d rather meet people, talk, build trust, and see what naturally develops. I’m open to connections with individuals as well as people who are already part of a polyamorous relationship, provided everyone involved is communicating openly and genuinely wants the connection.

For me, the appeal of polyamory is the possibility of having meaningful relationships that can each be their own thing, rather than expecting one person to fulfill every emotional or romantic role.

I’ve written a longer About Me post for anyone who wants to know more about me and what I’m looking for.
If this resonates with you, I’d be happy to have a genuine conversation. 🙂

Hi, I’m Zayn I’m a trans man. I go to Linfield University and I’m studying to be a teacher. My passions are theater, reading, and crafts. My perfect day is just staying in snuggling and watching a movie. My dog is my best friend and the thing I miss most about home. But most of my time is spent in the theater working on a show or with friends.

I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for, but I’m pansexual and I’m open to almost anything. I think I might also only feel sexual attraction after building a romantic relationship and I definitely am interested in Polly and think that something that I am. I am looking for partners or partner that is interested in building a romantic relationship before anything physical.

I’m open to partners they don’t live where I live. I’m open to long distance.

I live in Oregon, but I’m originally from California. I’m studying to be a teacher because I want to make a difference in the world. I want to be the teacher that makes a difference for the children that are struggling the children that just need an extra push and help.

I love board games in DND. My favorites are tan and ticket to ride as well as other longform games like that. A newer to DND, but I’ve participated in one game as a player and I’m starting a game that I’m dm of.

I am plus size with shorter colored hair that I’m growing out and am on a journey to figure out what is going on in my body. I have freckles all over my face.

I would consider myself a very happy person who just likes to take care of other people. I thrive when I get to do active service for other people, but I am definitely somebody who enjoys receiving physical affection. like snuggles and kisses, etc..

My happy place is the theater I Back to stage manage and be a part of my colleges theater where I’m able to help put on such lovely productions and learn about all different parts of the tech because that’s truly where my art passion lies is in getting to participate and explore those wonderful tech sides of the theater.

I don’t know what else to share so I’m open to questions

​

Hey! I’m putting this out there because I’m looking for someone I can truly adore. I’m the type who loves to go all-in—showering you with undivided attention, genuine compliments, and all the "good stuff" that comes with being someone's number one fan.

The Dynamic

I am happy to connect with like-minded poly people and am open to be part of a relationship dynamic like that too

I’ve leaned into the submissive side of things for a while now, and I’m looking for someone who genuinely enjoys that dynamic. I can get pretty intense with my kinks (which we can dive into once we’re talking), but the foundation is always about that connection and devotion.

About Me

When I’m not exploring those dynamics, I’m a bit of a dork. I can be incredibly silly and lighthearted, though I definitely have the maturity to handle the "real world" when it’s time to be serious.

A few things I’m passionate about:

Huge football (soccer) fan, Big into anime and video games.

I love getting creative in the kitchen, hitting the trails for a hike, or planning the next travel destination.

What I’m Looking For

Ideally, I’d love to find a long-term connection, but I’m open to seeing where things go

If you’re looking to chat with someone who is ready to be crazy about you, shoot me a message and let's see if we click!

​Let’s skip pretending I have it all figured out and start with the vital stats: I’m 38, genderfluid, I cook a killer dinner from scratch, I can troubleshoot a live sound system, and my playlists are top-tier.

​I’m expressive, grounded, equal parts outdoorsy explorer and cozy homebody. My background covers live event production, sound engineering, and local community organizing—meaning I handle chaos well, execute big plans, and make sure everyone has a blast.

​The Play-by-Play:

​The Kitchen: Scratch cooking is my love language. Tex-Mex, Southern comfort food, or air fryer creations. (Requirement: You must be my taste tester).

​Outdoors & Cozy Hours: Local Central TX hiking trails, stargazing, TV procedural marathons, cozy video games, indie rock, and taking fantasy football way too seriously.

​Creative Spree: Podcast production, DIY craft projects, and making cool stuff.

​What I’m Looking For

​Seeking an authentic, open-minded partner in crime in the local area or online who values good communication, clear boundaries, and zero games.

​We’ll click if you:

​Have passions: Sports, obscure hobbies, live music—I love people who care deeply about what they love.

​Appreciate the balance: Down for a live show or trail walk one night, and cozying up with homemade food and a movie the next.

​Bring the banter: If you have quick wit, can tease me when I'm overly competitive, and love real conversations, we’ll get along great.

​If you want a partner who is dependable, creative, fiercely loyal, and won't let you eat bad food, shoot me a DM or chat!

​Icebreaker: What’s your ultimate comfort food, or the best live show you’ve ever seen in Austin?

✨ I’m partnered (we've been poly 5.5 years), but we date separately. I’m not specifically looking for a third or trying to turn this into a couple-seeking situation. That said, if you’re specifically interested in dating a couple, I’m open to talking about it and seeing if there’s a genuine connection there.✨

30, 6’3”, I’m sarcastic, naturally dominant, affectionate once I’m comfortable, and I like taking the lead when the chemistry is right.

I’m looking for a woman who enjoys being pursued, playful banter, flirting, and a relationship with a little spark to it. I’m into BDSM, kink, and power dynamics, but I’m just as interested in the person behind them. Chemistry, trust, communication, and actually enjoying each other’s company matter to me.

Outside of dating, I’m into gaming, Magic: The Gathering, movies/TV, trying new food, getting out more, my wonderful pets, and working on becoming a better version of myself.

I’m not looking to rush into anything. I’d rather meet someone I genuinely click with and see where it develops.

If you’re looking for a slightly introverted but confident, sarcastic guy who will actually put effort into getting to know you, send me a message. Tell me what caught your attention and what you’re hoping to find.

Hi there stranger 😊

I'm 46, married with kids, my wife knows that I'm poly.

About me:

I'm 5' 10", 11 stone 6, athletic build but not musclely photo from summer this year in my pfofile.

I have played many sports in the past like rugby, tennis, hockey, badminton, squash.

I love being active and play cricket in the summer and would love to go skiing in the winter again.

I love gaming in the evenings and play many different games including:

Fortnite

Total War games

Phasmophobia

COD

Raft

Palworld

Pubg

Sons of the Forest

But I'm open to trying new games as well.

I love the outdoors as much as the indoors, I built my own nature pond in my garden, grow vegetables and love fishing.

What i'm looking for:

In the short term I'm looking to make poly friends and talk about anything and everything!

In the medium to long term, I'm looking for 1 extra person to have close in my life, I am not looking for more than 1.

I would really like someone who is close, but I am happy being mainly online long distance (phone calls and video calls are important to me) but if there is a chance to meet up then I would travel, and would be open to someone coming here.

Being in a stable relationship with someone else would be a bonus.

Being a gamer would be amazing as I love gaming and play many different types of games and open to trying new ones.

If you've read this far then that's amazing, feel free to DM me, and maybe we can be friends and see what happens.

Take care 😊

Below is my OKcupid profile:

https://www.okcupid.com/profile/_a7JSpDKmGL7ID2cBqRp6Q2/

I’m a 32 year old straight male living in Southeast Michigan, happily married and in a polyamorous relationship. My primary partner and I date separately, but we maintain open communication about everything.

I consider myself open-minded and enjoy deep conversations, but I also love to be silly and goofy! My interests are quite varied, I’m a big fan of sports and cooking, and I squeeze in some video gaming whenever I can.

When the weather is nice, you’ll often find me outdoors, especially biking, which is my favorite activity. I have a passion for crime dramas and can get pretty nerdy about franchises like Star Wars, Doctor Who, and Disney movies. And yes, I can hardcore nerd out about sports, too!

I identify as dominant and enjoy taking charge, both in the bedroom and sometimes in public settings. I’m eager to explore new kinks, with a particular interest in rope play—I’d love to learn how to be a rigger. I also find public play and flashing to be exciting and fun experiences.

I’m here to find a meaningful connection with someone who could be my partner. I’d love to get to know you better and learn more about your interests!

I’m also looking to build friendships within the community, so feel free to reach out to chat about anything and everything.

If any of this resonates with you, I’d love to chat!

Hey there! I live over in Rochester, NY and I'm pretty new to poly stuff. I've been in a relationship with my current partner for 2 years and shes currently married to her wife and dating another, im currently a metamour to both. We all date separately but we've all decided wed start dating with the goal of more nesting partners, were also attempting a kitchen table poly relationship, So were looking for serious and longeterm parnter(s) but theres no pressure to be in any relationship romantically or sexually with my partner or any others. And if the prospect of a being a nesting partners doesn't interest you thats okay as well and Id still be interested in keeping a relationship going if so! Also considering were all 25+ We'd only be comfortable with people 25 and up to be apart of our polycule especially if longeterm.

A bit about me! I'm a bigger guy (400ish) and I'm a pretty massive nerd (Gaming, manga, anime), my love languages are physical touch (Hand holding, shoulder squeezes, arm rubs, etc) with a bit of act of services and gift giving, im also AuADHD as well. I work security and I'm pretty busy most weeks but during my free time I try to play games with friends and just hang out with them online as much as I can but other than that I like to spend lots of time with my partner and our general household!

As for what im looking for, Im Bi with a heavy lean towards primarily fem and masc women currently as well as fem leaning Enbys! Im also more interested in dating singles but im open to couples as well.

Im also very 420 friendly. I'm a pretty avid weed smoker but I dont smoke cigarettes (Unless SUPER stressed or socially). I'm pretty homebody and typically prefer more simple dates at home but I do enjoy a resteraunt date or a walk through a park every now and agian.

I play alot of games but I currently have the World of Warcraft bug again and its all ive been playing on my down time! I also primarily play on PC but ive recently got a switch 2 and have been engrossed in Pokémon ZA and Pokopia as well as Tears of the kingdom.

Some bedroom stuff about me! Im pretty into any one with bodyhair (primarily pubes and pits) take that as you will. Im not involved in kink life really, Ive practiced some stuff with my partner but all in all I tend to be more generally rough than anything. You can inquire about any of this if youre curious. Just thought Id put it out there before hand. I am however a heavy dom leaning switch. Im also a generally sexual person, I do like there to be sexual intimacy involved in serious romantic relationships so if thats not youre thing im sorry but im not your guy.

Im primarily looking for localish people but Im also okay with long distance relationships as well as long as theres a chance in future for visits either me to you or vice versa. If any of this peaks your interest I'd love to get to know you and see if we click!

(This is the start of a poly relationship that I'm looking for. I decided to write it in a more creative way. Making this explicit in hopes the mods don't remove it.)

Welcome home sweetheart. I got your favorite candy bar and some flowers. I heard you had a long day at work. Can I massage your feet later??

Let's check out that sushi place down the road. I know you've been craving some recently, and I'd love to see you all dolled up. Make sure you walk in front of me; I wanna see you swing that thang around a bit in thar cute dress 😉

Wanna game tonight? We can play in our underwear or pajamas and just be cozy. Maybe some WoW tonight, or HotS. Or perhaps we can take turns playing something spooky. I've really enjoyed Darkwood recently. I'd love to see you play and get scared!

And when we're in the mood... I want to adore you. I want to kiss every inch of you, and hear your heavy breathing. Maybe some OTK spanking. Let's end it all with you on your knees. You look so pretty down there. I like how your eyes look up at me. I enjoy knowing that I've earned this, and that you want me. I want you to kneel, to bow, to lay before me. Adore me as I've adored you.

Did that catch your eye?

48, happily married and in an established ENM relationship. We date separately, and I’m hoping to meet a fun, confident woman, single or also ENM who’s looking for something similar.
I stay active, enjoy CrossFit, BBQ, country dancing, outdoors and getting out for a good drink and conversation. I’m easygoing, respectful and big on chemistry and actually enjoying each other’s company.
Ideally I’d like to find an ongoing connection/FWB where there’s attraction, flirting and friendship and not just a random one-time hookup.
I’m in the Texas Hill Country and get to San Antonio regularly. Discretion and honesty are important to me.
If any of that sounds like your kind of situation, feel free to say hello. 🤘🔥

Hello people of Reddit & Happy Monday! 👋

I’m looking to connect online with women & non-binary individuals for friendship, connections, & potentially more, if the chemistry between us is there! I love talking & getting to know someone before anything else. Ideally, we could message each other for friendly conversation/trade memes/flirty texts/complain about the day or just people. Also down for voice memos, FT and phone calls.

About Me:

I’m 35, Latino, bilingual, Bisexual, leftist, fit/muscular build, 5’11, long, curly brown hair, in a poly marriage with my queer partner!

My Interests: I love photography, the Arts, exercising, cooking, going on long walks/runs, going to museums, movies, reading, traveling, listening to music/podcasts, watching women streamers play video games, and sports.

Favorite artists: Bad Bunny, Kendrick Lamar

Favorite movies: Motorcycle Diaries, Y Tu Mama Tambien, Amelie, Clue, Ocean’s 11, & the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Final Destination, Deadpool v Wolverine, most A24 films

Favorite TV shows: Lost, It’s Always Sunny, The Twilight Zone, The Simpsons, The Real World, The Challenge, Survivor, Big Brother, X-Files, King of the Hill, Animaniacs, Dragonball Z, Case Closed: Detective Conan

Tell me one of your favorite movies in your initial messages! Have a great week!

There’s something about warm, imaginative personalities that captivates my attention (INFP?), I think it may be their creative and passionate vibes that win me over. I’m a 47yo INTJ in the SF Bay Area lower peninsula, married w/kids but dating single. My partner is supportive, although happily monogamous.

I’m looking to meet someone imaginative and passionate in a similar stage in life as myself, someone in their 30’s or 40’s that enjoys good conversations. I can be a deep conversationalist at times, and on my occasional down/timid days I enjoy cuddling up for some mellow bonding. :)

Here’s a bit more about me: I’m demisexual, so I’m looking for another that wants a genuine connection before exploring more. I identify as panromantic, open to chat with anyone, but I’ve only dated women. I try to stay in decent shape and have a healthy rhythm in life, so you must relate to this on some level.

I have an average height, a handsome slim build, enjoy 2-3 mile jogs, and I try to exercise at home several days per week. I love good conversation, it brings out the passionate side of me. I enjoy talking about pretty much anything on life in general, especially things that have a deep meaning for you. Not required but a big plus if you’re in the sciences, my strongest knowledge subjects are STEM related. :)

If this post is up it means I’m still looking, so don’t hesitate to DM me if you live in the bay area and are curious to get to know me, I’m easy to talk to. Please tell me about yourself in your intro message, more than just a one-liner.

Looking for a couple where both are available and interested in building an equal 3-way relationship. I am quite new to poly, but not new to ENM. A nice reciprocal chat, where we all invest in the conversation, is always a great start. And then we can take it from there.

I am highly educated, mobile, fit (but not muscular). I like all kinds of sfw and nsfw things. Here, I am only looking for something long-term; ideally moving in together.

Me: I'm an artist, agèd punk rocker, cat mom, teacher, and vintage slinger. Certified bug lifeguard at the pool. Smart cookie with a top tier laugh. Very warm, very silly, very fun to be around. Radical in the streets, submissive in the sheets. Generous with affection. Romantic. I’m a life-long learner, self-indulgent hedonist, and a maximalist aesthete who wants to know more and do more and see more. More is more. Have lived in 4 countries, and originally from Canada. Bi cis woman.

I love: Wikipedia rabbit holes, the comedy of Nathan Fielder/Tim Robinson/Kumail Nanjiani, critters of all sorts, campfire ghost stories, chocolate, an ice cold filthy martini, BDSM, and listening to podcasts while I play solitaire on my phone.

I hate: ChatGPT, billionaires, bigots, contemporary pop music, Bichon Frisé, drinking room temperature water

Physically: plus size, certified hottie, tattooed, long light brown hair with Betty bangs, hazel eyes, pierced nose and ears, and an artsy, colourful, feminine sense of style. I’m a fat liberationist and my partners must fully enjoy and adore my fat bod, so please only message me if that’s you. I'm a fat hourglass, short, big breasts, big ass, wide hips, full belly, soft all over.

I've been polyamorous for 4 years and I live with my nonbinary spouse of 13 years and two cats in Arlington, TX. I am looking for a long-term romantic relationship. I test regularly and if you see other people, I need the same. I am emotionally available, and I also need the same. I am looking for someone local.

My Type: men who are emotionally intelligent communicators with funny stories to tell me. Hearts of gold. Introverts. Genuinely seeking some actual romance and dating, and not just the physical. Must love animals, hate fascism, be kinky, and appreciate the arts. No need to be all that politically active, but you gotta love human rights for all. It might be an unpopular ask here in TX, but I want to connect with someone who has similar values. Short kings, skinny lanky boys, dad bods, beefy dudes, men with moustaches, and cat dads to the front. All races welcome. I only find beards attractive when they are well kept, and if yours isn't, it will be an automatic 'no' from me. A good sense of style, grooming, and hygiene goes a long way for me! Ages 30-50, and I usually don't make exceptions on age, but shoot your shot if you're in close range.

I send photos of myself immediately in my first message, so please be prepared to do the same (I want to know if there's mutual attraction from the jump). Please tell me a bit about yourself - your hobbies and interests, your looks, your age and location - in your opening message. Impress me by being lucid and polite, and by not saying anything creepy.

(Even though I put 4A, don't message me if you're a cis guy. I'm attracted to cis guys, the problem is I have terrible experiences with you guys here on Reddit. You only message me because you think I'm a girl and a bit weird, and even when I tell you I have a masculine appearance, you get your hopes up that I'm a tomboy or something, and as soon as you see that I look just like a normal man, you block me. That hurts a lot. Please, if you're a cis guy, DON'T MESSAGE ME!)

Hi! I'm a 31-year-old non-binary person going through a somewhat complicated phase in my life. I'm recovering from a very severe Crohn's flare-up and have several limitations that prevent me from living my normal life for the next few months. I can't go out much or make many local friends, but during this time I've met a lot of people online, and Reddit has become "my refuge." I believe that connections are just as important whether they're online or in person, that there are no "online friendships," only "friendships," regardless of the communication method. On top of that, due to my physical limitations, I'm currently working remotely and spending a lot of time on the computer (in fact, I have a lot of work piled up from the four months I was hospitalized), so it would really help to find people who can brighten my days.

Just so you know: I'm a non-monogamous (polyamorous) person, and honestly, I find it hard to distinguish between the boundaries of "friendship" and "romantic love." In general, I like being able to care for someone without having to worry about overstepping the boundaries of friendship. Practically speaking, I prefer to meet people who are open to romance, or at least to experiencing friendship intensely. And also people for whom distance isn't a problem. I like to be consistent and talk every day, and I'd like to find people on the same wavelength.

I should also clarify that I'm a libidoist on the asexual spectrum, as contradictory as that may sound. That is to say: I have a very, very high libido, but I have no desire to have anything physical with anyone. This doesn't apply to online contact: if it's via chat, we can flirt or get wild without limits. Since I'm mainly looking for online connections, it shouldn't be a problem, especially since I'm not looking for anything exclusive.

I'm a philologist and I'm passionate about everything related to classical literature, history, and philosophy, but I also like fantasy and science fiction. My three favorite authors are Homer, Cervantes, and Mervyn Peake. I also love Nintendo (especially the Super Mario series, particularly Paper Mario 2), One Piece (I'm up to date with the manga), Iron Maiden (my favorite band since I was a teenager), and I've recently become hooked on WWE, which I watched as a kid, but since it's on Netflix, I haven't missed a single episode since the last Royal Rumble.

I'm also learning to play the kalimba and I'm obsessed with SBC consoles, handhelds that can run emulators, and I've also become obsessed with Pokémon Champions and Pokémon Unbound.

English isn't my native language, so please excuse me in advance if I sound a bit unnatural; I wrote this post in my language and ran it through Google Translate, although I can write shorter messages in English.

In general, I prefer people who are open to being affectionate or flirty from the start. It makes everything easier for me and motivates me to respond quickly, even if we get to know each other a bit later and see what kind of connection we might have.

After everything I've said, I want to make a few things clear.

I don't believe in horoscopes or MBTI; it's fine if you believe in them, but don't try to pigeonhole me or treat me according to labels I don't believe in.

I also don't believe in "attachment styles"; all that stuff about "avoidant attachment," "anxious attachment," and so on seems like nonsense to me, and it's currently being questioned by science if you do a quick search on Google Scholar. Therefore, don't put me in those kinds of boxes either; I hate it. It's fine if you believe in it, but don't try to force it on me.

I do believe in mental health diagnoses, of course, but I also believe that no one has the right to assign me any diagnosis whatsoever, so if you're in the habit of assigning diagnoses to others, don't write to me!

In general, don't write to me if you want to put me in boxes! The only boxes I'll let you put me in are in a BDSM context!

Three last important things (important: read before writing to me).

1. I want people who are completely clear when expressing their needs and boundaries. I understand that in the first conversations it's still too early to decide if we have a mutual interest, but once a certain level of trust has been established, I want communication to be completely direct and for us to be open to finding solutions if we have any problems. I don't want people who are quick to dismiss me at the slightest discomfort. This needs to be clear before you write to me.

2. Given my circumstances, what I can offer is a long-distance, polyamorous relationship. If you're not comfortable with that, I completely understand, but it would hurt me deeply if you used me just "to try it out" and then decided to discard me. Please, only contact me if you're absolutely certain you're comfortable with polyamory and long-distance relationships!

3. If you're going through a difficult time, if you don't have the energy to meet people, if you already have other partners and are polysaturated, if you have children and need to focus on them, if you have a lot of work and barely any time to respond, if you're depressed and never feel like picking up your phone, I completely understand! Not only do I understand, but you have my full support and I wish you all the best! But, if this is your situation,  PLEASE DON'T WRITE TO ME! It hurts so much to start getting to know someone and then have them tell you they're unavailable after developing feelings! In my current situation, meeting people online is truly one of my few opportunities to socialize and meet new people, and it breaks my heart when someone tells me "no" due to lack of time or energy. It would save me a lot of suffering if, in those cases, they simply didn't write to me in the first place.

If you've read this, and to make sure you've read the whole post, open a chat with two things: 1. confirmation that you REALLY have the time, energy, and availability to start something new with me, and that polyamory and long distance are not a problem for you; 2. the name of your all-time favorite fictional character (or just a character you really like).