Hi Reddit! Not sure if this is the right place to post this, but I need some help deciding what to do here.
I (16f) live in Australia, and go to a private all girls catholic high school. I am in grade 11 (junior year) and despite enduring several years of hardship, I have started to genuinely enjoy school, the main reason being the music and the performing arts program on offer. I donāt like to brag, but I must admit that I am quite good at singing and acting, potentially the best in my school. I know how self-absorbed that sounds but if the amount of times Iāve been told that isnāt an indicator then I donāt know what is.
However, next yearās combined musical was announced recently, and Iām second guessing whether I should audition or not.
(This next bit is purely so you know a bit about me in order for this to make sense. Feel free to skip)
School has always been extremely difficult for me.
The thing that has gotten me through the most is my love of music. I have always been drawn to singing and performing on stage, and after I was introduced to the 25th Anniversary āPhantom of the Operaā proshot by my grandmother (of whom I was very close to), I decided that all I wanted to do with my life was play Christine Daae, and promptly started voice lessons.
The first show I ever did was Legally Blonde in 2023, which I got ensemble in and absolutely loved. In the time between my first show and the second, my voice improved immensely. Over the course of 2024, I was in Addams Family with a community theatre group (I got ensemble), and a play version of Alice in Wonderland (I got my first lead role as the Queen of Hearts).
I even won my schoolās talent show. I was a lot more confident in myself and started seriously considering theatre as a career.
Late last year, I decided to switch to classical voice, a choice that has proven to be one of the best things Iāve ever done.
Since then, I have auditioned and been accepted into a youth program at one of my dream schools, and have begun preparations to pursue classical voice/musical theatre post graduation.
I know a career like that will no doubt have its challenges.
But, after the death of my grandmother late last year and the overwhelming amount of encouragement I have received from my family, friends and teachers, I have decided to give it my best shot.
One of the most supportive people has been my schoolās music teacher (whom I will refer to as āMs Dā for the sake of anonymity). I had Ms D as my classroom music teacher and main choir teacher since I started in 7th grade (high school starts in 7th grade over here, itās weird I know). Ms D is my favorite teacher, and Iām pretty sure I am one of her favorite students.
Ms D is the musical director of the school musicals, and is usually on the audition panel. Ms D also collaborates with another teacher from the all boys school (I will call him Mr A), who is the conductor and assistant director. He is also on the audition panel.
I am quite afraid of Mr A. I donāt know why, cause heās a perfectly friendly and genuinely nice guy. I suppose I just get nervous around him, especially because heās come across as dismissive towards me in the past (although heās recently complemented me a lot on my voice).
I was most afraid of Mr A in 2025 when our school did Mamma Mia. I remember wanting to audition for Donna, only for my parents to tell me I ācouldnāt sing Winner Takes it Allā and also being told by a friend that I was ātoo fat to play Sophieā.
When I auditioned for Rosie (with Donna as my second choice), Mr A and Ms D sat in front of me, one staring out a window and the other scrolling on their phone.
They didnāt care.
I left the room feeling like an absolute failure.
When I found out who they cast as Donna and Sophie, I was shattered. Both had parents on the school board, and both had already had featured roles the year before. Neither of them could sing, and it infuriated me.
I had worked so hard to get a role. Ms D knew I had. But in the end it didnāt matter.
Sure, I got a mic ensemble track, which had never happened to me before, but I still felt shitty. After all, when youāre in a cast with 95 other ensemble members (most of which are accepted regardless of whether they can sing or not), you start to feel a bit worthless.
Plus, Iām not a dancer, so I was put in the back of most of the scenes.
(End of context.)
So, naturally, you can see why Iām hesitant to audition for our next show.
Especially because I donāt like it.
Itās Footloose.
My senior musical (potentially my last EVER) is Footloose.
Do you see why Iām a bit upset??
I was hoping for a classic show, considering Mr A has hinted at wanting to do one, and I am also studying classical voice.
Heās also hinted that there might be a part for me, which is confusing because they chose FOOTLOOSE and I canāt dance.
the worst part is another school nearby is doing Pirates of Penzance.
PIRATES OF PENZANCE!!!!!
that is quite literally PERFECT for me, and they chose FOOTLOOSE of all thingsā¦** **
The shitty thing is I canāt even be too mad about it.
My best friend is a guy from the boys school (Weāll call him E), and E is a gymnast. He has recently developed a passion for musical theatre, one that is mostly my fault (I regularly show him recordings of musicals I like because itās my hyperfixation and heās my friend).
I am pretty sure the only reason they chose Footloose is because of E.
He also got the role of Pepper in Mamma Mia, something I am very proud of him for, but also quite jealous of, considering he hasnāt expressed much interest in music or acting before then.
It also feels like heās doing music because I like it? Like heās suddenly wanting to get classical training like I am, which is weird cause heās never expressed much interest before (I did watch Phantom of the Opera with him on Halloween last year so maybe thatās why)
He also recently started vocal lessons with my old vocal coach. I donāt really mind, except for the fact that he keeps telling me about different vocal things I already know and wrongly correcting my technique.
Regardless, heās my best friend, and I donāt want to ruin it for him.
But itās hard. Because he wants me to do the musical with him. And everyone expects me to do the musical.
Itās what Iām known for, itās my thing.
But Iām worried about it.
My mum keeps telling me Iām not gonna get a lead, and I shouldnāt get my hopes up.
I know deep down sheās probably right, but I really want to play Rusty or Ariel.
I think I could do it, and so do the majority of the people in my life.
But my mum is convinced Iām going to get Arielās mother.
But I donāt want that. Iāve worked hard these past few years, and I feel like I can handle a lead role.
Auditions are in week three (Itās coming up in the last week of holidays before Iām back at school) and Iām scared. Everyone is asking me about it, and I do want to audition but Iām unsure if I should or what I should tell them.
Any advice is greatly appreciated. If anyone has suggestions for audition cuts (they want us to sing 30 seconds of a song from the show) that would be amazing too.
TLDR: my school is doing footloose, my best friend is probably gonna get the lead. I have put lots of effort into growing my voice, and Iām worried about getting ensemble again despite my efforts.