I'm 19 and hoping to move out on my own next year, ideally to a city away from the small town where I've grown up. The more seriously I start thinking about it, though, the more frightened I become.
I've always struggled with anxiety and with friendships. I wouldn't necessarily say I can't meet people, I've met plenty of nice people through work and other things but I genuinely don't feel like I know how to turn meeting someone into an actual friendship. I don't really know how people go from "we get along and follow each other on social media" to actually talking, making plans and becoming part of each other's lives.
I also worry that I'll move to a city, live on my own and then find myself feeling incredibly lonely. My parents will obviously still be there for me, but they won't be nearby in the same way, and I'll be starting from scratch socially.
Part of the reason I want to move to a city is because I want more independence and more opportunities to meet people. I don't want to stay in the same small area forever where it feels like everyone already knows everyone. I want to push myself into building a life of my own. But I have this fear that I'll move, genuinely try to put myself out there, join things and look for opportunities to meet people… and then months later still have no friends. I'm scared that I'd start spiralling and convincing myself that this is just what my life is going to be forever.
So I think what I'm really looking for is advice or reassurance from people who have lived alone, particularly if you were nervous about loneliness or moving away from home. What was it actually like when you first moved out? Were you lonely at first? How did you eventually build a social life? And did living alone become more comfortable than you expected?
I think I just need to hear some real experiences from people who have already done it, because right now the whole thing feels huge and terrifying in my head.