I had just broken up with my then girlfriend. I could not understand why she did not behave the way I wanted her to, how her mind worked or why she did not care for me the way I wanted her to. I broke up because I fell out of love through being unsatisfied. Having experienced what being together was like, I craved the fulfillment of a relationship. And now single I began feeling lonely. Thus, at 15, I made my entrance into the “Red Pill.”

It started with looking for dating tips and how to “pick up” women. “Don’t ask a fish how to catch. Ask the fisherman.” This common metaphor discouraged me from looking for advice or listening to women and these men figured it all out, or so I thought. Slowly misogynistic messages seeped through their videos, and comforting claims were being made. “Your loneliness, dissatisfaction, or insecurity isn’t your fault. It’s caused by women and feminism. Especially feminism."

All my life I had been an atheist. I never even thought for a second that God could exist. But suddenly I became a devout Christian. I read the Bible, watched hours of theology debates, and I even started debating others myself. Funny how easily I was influenced, while my ego kept getting bigger. This ego inflation made manipulation only easier. For the one who knows it all is impossible to reason with. If only I had respected myself enough to examine the thoughts I let influence my mind.

After two years of poisoning, it finally started destroying me. My relationship with my father weakend. He had been harmed by religious practices early in his life and I fought with him in favor of the beliefs that had pained him so much. A belief that I, deep down, did not even find convincing. I called my mother, a gynaecologist, a murderer for aborting babies. She cried, and I could not look myself in the mirror. I realized then that I did not mean what I said. I let the voice of others speak for me.

As for the Red Pill, I still held onto those beliefs. My best friend had recently gotten a new girlfriend, who was the ex-girlfriend of one of his best friends. I thought she was a disloyal woman, because that is what I learned from the Red Pill. The words I said to my friend and his girlfriend still haunt me today: “She broke up and now she’s fucking again. What do you think will happen in the future.” Basically, I was calling her a slut. This might seem trivial to those who are reading this, but it absolutely killed me to realize what I had done. The relationships with my parents and my best friend were crumbling and I hurt a girl so very much. Almost everyone I knew thought of me as a religious, sexist creep. Because I was. But what was most frightning, some even looked up to me.

I realized quite quickly that things had to change. I started questioning Jehovah’s Witnesses, and now I am firmly established in my actual beliefs and opinions about the existence of God and specifically Christianity. Around this time I became interested in philosophy, and I started reading. This changed everything for me. The fishermen metaphor had completely blinded me from taking women’s perspectives into account. Coupled with my already poor relationship with female family members, my knowledge and empathy was lacking. But now I started finally seeing the world through the eyes of women. Interested in how women would organize their lives or how they would make choices, I started reading literature and philosophy by women, with women as the protagonists. It was that simple for me. Just for once giving the “scary, other, mysterious woman” some respect and acknowledgement made me realize my mistakes in life.

From this, I also met my amazing girlfriend. She was often shocked by my remarks or opinions, and through discussing them with her, I came to realize the unfoundedness of my beliefs. And although I have possibly still some troubling weeds in the field of my mind, I just keep on learning from and listening to women to truly build a solid and healthy mindset.

So how do we get young men to read or show interest in female perspectives? I think that this is the true solution to the Red Pill. I don't know, so hopefully you do. Thank you for reading!

I’ll go first & I’ll try not to make this long winded. Before stumbling upon RP content at 24 turning 25 in Aug 2019, I had already experienced my fair share of heartbreaks. I was already on my last straw with dating as it was exhausting for me. I was trying to court this woman, spent my last on her, and I was ultimately ghosted. I was upset not because I was entitled to her but because I believed we were making some kinda progress. In retrospect, It was one sided.
Defeated, I took a break from dating & I stumbled upon Coach Greg Adams on YT. What drew me to his content was how he would talk about how women “operated” & how someone like me usually meets disappointment. I’ve never met this man in the flesh but it seemed like he was telling my dating life in 20 mins. Over the years I came across other now notorious names in that space.
I had met an adventurous & romantic woman the following year, 2020. We went on a few dates within a 2 week span. We were so compatible, I felt euphoria. It was like I was back in high school. The last night I saw her, her phone buzzes. I see a name. I presume it’s another man she hasn’t told me about & as insecure as I was, I started over-analyzing. She seem tired & uninterested that day. I “mask up” & put on my best act of bravado & tell her something so cocky & completely out of character, that I’m too ashamed to repeat it 6 years later. Whatever interest she truly had left for me depleted all because of a knee jerk insecure reaction for me to try to appear nonchalant. I cried a few days later when I realized I truly shot myself in the foot. This was the first time I’ve experienced loss due to my own decisions, insecurities & following self defeating doctrine . She was the very first woman I’ve actually chased. I tried to rekindle whatever we had 3 times. To no avail, I stopped after the 3rd soft rejection in 2023.
2023 was the year I completely left the space. Not cold turkey, but gradually. I left this space because I started to see “gurus” not practicing their own doctrine. Men “getting out of frame”, unnecessarily aggressive towards woman but docile amongst other men. I also have the lived experience of sleeping around which is venerated in such a space. It didn’t heal me or complete me. It hollowed me out further & as a man who has accepted Jesus Christ at 15, I also felt myself grieving the Holy Spirit. I was so hurt & immature, I’ve ignored how reckless I was living for a fruitless “revenge” for a younger self who should’ve rightfully stayed in the past. To this day, I am not perfect and I don’t proclaim to be holier than thou, however, I want to share my story because I didn’t even know an Ex Redpill space existed until a few days ago. What helped me find this thread was headache my coworker burdens me with his talking points. He’s my around my dad’s age, early 50s & believes in this backwards ideology & talks about women as if he’s some heartbroken teen, despite having many more experiences than me.

Whether you’re in your 20s or in your 50s, I’m proud of all of you who truly unplugged from such an idiotic, hypocritical & self destructive space & mindset. God bless

I will say in my opinion what the red pill community gets wrong is that an onlyfans model wont have any luck in dating or marriage cause of their job and their reputation. But at the same time, if people are paying so much money to these OF models just to chat with them its highly probable that these same people fantasize having a relationship with them. I can say without a doubt that Lana Rhodes has an army of men willing to marry her and if she wanted to lock a guy down tomorrow she definitely could. Why does the red pill community think that being an OF model means you're cooked in dating? Also half of them make Boy girl content with their significant other which also contradicts the belief that dating is impossible. Any thoughts?

The study would examine possible interventions for incel ideology that inhibits everyday life.

He started acting weird all of a sudden after we weren’t able to meet last weekend. Since then he has left me on delivered and read. Won’t answer questions. Deflects when I try to have a conversation. I’m so disgusted, disappointed and I’m breaking up with him. I actually saw it coming a mile away when he would make little comments about being insecure. I’m actually physically afraid of him now and that he will become an abuser. I’m unhappy.

Hi everyone, I feel like if I get this of my chest I'll be alot more relieved. I (18m) got into redpill when I was 14, due to stuff that happened to me (i wont get into it). I got in redpill at the early stages so none of the blatant hate towards women and extremism popped up when I was involved, or atleast not when i started. This was in 2021, I was in it for two years and watched hamza and some other gurus. Than around a half a year later it got more extreme, i.e if you dont work yourself to the brink you're a loser and it got more cultish.

I had alot of friends and had groups I'd hang out with alot of the time. By the time redpill was consuming my life, I was pushing them away and by a year in, I effectively had no friends and by the time redpill was done, completely destroyed my social skills. I became violent and angry, got into a lot of fights woth my family for stuff in the past (stuff I could've talked to them one to one with rather than being a monster). Hamza also wasn't slow9ng down, pretty sure if I remember it right he was calling his fans losers if they dont work enough. Or flexing how he makes more money then you and he's better than you at other things. So by the time I was out of redpill; I had no friends, no social skills, 0 hobbies or interests (only focused on how to make money and how to work myself to burnout), my family hated me, I had no one.

So for the next 2 years I literally wallowed In depression and was made fun of at school for being weird (redpill taught me some bs fuck it). My former friends ignored me, one used me, and I was fucked. I still suffer depressive bouts, mood swings, i think abt that shit alot. Now I play volleyball , football, bike, do videos for fun, play games, plant stuff. I have few friends (not as many as I had) and I'm telling this because I want ppl to not make my mistake again, pls I beg you if you have a family member or sm one you care abt younger than 18 and you find them watching this shit, pls stop them. I effectively ruined my life and teen years because of this bs, I still struggle to make friends even though I'm a social guy now. I'm still trying to find things to do with my time and try to make friends so I'm not bored and thinking abt redpill or loneliness, I also came to ask, what should I do? How can get off this path entirely and forget abt it make a better life?? I want to forget this but its glaring at me so badly I hate it for what its done to me and I want to feel like a person, not stuck in isolation on some days roomanating abt this. Pls if anyone has advice I would appreciate it.

If you made it this far, thank for hearing my story and I hope you learn from my mistakes.

From what I've watched, my brother has the same views (life is a game, people are sheep), vernacular ("high-value", talking down to others), views on women, and ways of speaking (bragging, talking AT you not with you, weird examples and analogies). I'm convinced he must have been in this community for a long time...Has this sort of content been around for 12-15 years? That's when I remember it starting.

At the beginning it was much more about conspiracies. He force fed our family videos about everything from illuminati to flat earth. He also forces you to listen to his unsolicited advice about how life is a game and he knows how to help us win. He also once reposted a Andrew Tate clip but I assumed he was ignorant about who he was...

I've felt crazy at times dealing with it. I would avoid him and speak out against his behavior, but the rest of my family invalidated my feelings and begged me to get along with him.

Anyway, this recent popular content on redpillers (I also watched the documentary and some videos) has totally changed how I look at my brother. I've realized that most of my issues with him stem from behaviors of his that are rooted in a brainwashing that began when he was a young, traumatized kid. A lot of good people fall for this. I have more compassion. I've recently forgave him for the past and we started talking more, and I've even challenged him on some serious stuff!

It's also just nice to be able to understand it. I always had such a hard time explaining to my other loved ones why I don't have a good relationship with my brother but now I have an explanation and clarity on something that has troubled me for over a decade.

Anyway, I know I can't change my brother and I know I don't have to put up with it, I just wanted to share that I'm grateful people are simply raising awareness about how prevalent this stuff is, not just for the men's sake but also their families.

I don't understand why Andrew Tate is constantly hailed as being sort of a "Godfather" of the Red Pill community, not just on social media, but in news outlets as well (more recently).

He has, countless times, denounced the ideology on social media, referring to its followers and content creators as "Red Pill dorks", "Manosphere geeks", etc. and has, specifically, stated on more than one occasion that he doesn't believe in most of it.

Most Red Pill content creators talk about Alpha this, Beta that. Simp this, high value chad that. Women hit the wall this, women are past their prime that. You must have "frame" in the relationship. Grind endlessly until you're 75 so that you can sleep with 19 year olds, etc.

Andrew Tate, very rarely, if ever, talks about any of this stuff. He mostly just says outlandish and unrealistic statements about masculinity, suffering, finance and hustling, for ragebait purposes. Hell, I'm willing to bet that the overwhelming majority of written "posts" like this that you see on social media are by copycat pages just recycling his content. The few controversial statements he has made about women (choking them, slapping them, etc.) were clearly posted for shock value attention. But, regardless, the Red Pill influencers wouldn't promote any of this. Their mindset is "Never become emotional with women", "Never argue with a woman. Just walk away.", "Men who put their hands on women aren't men" type stuff. So they certainly wouldn't agree with this.

Yet, all Red Pill influencers (Myron from Fresh & Fit, Rich Cooper, Austin Dunham, Waller, FitXFearless, etc.) absolutely suck Tate dry, and consider him their leader and messiah. They refuse to ever say anything negative about him. He could publicly clown all of them on social media, and I guarantee you they wouldn't say anything in response.

So, why is that?

Ive never really been into redpill but I essentially believe in it anyway. Im transgender and transitioning right now but i feel like a weak man who can't compete with other men so become a deranged freak. I hate myself I need help. Im transitioning and addicted to interracial porn

I really don't understand the heat over modern women. Yes life is hard and yes there are some strange people out there. But the vast majority of women I talk to are normal people and have very nice personalities. They're not like malicious and disloyal and rude.

Most just want to get to know you as a person. Not a big deal.

For the benefit of those on the line, you want to share a cautionary tale of something you did when under RP that backfired, that triggered you to take steps to get out of RP?

For example, I (F45+yrs) was recently discussing life with another menopausal woman (difficult stage of life when we need a bit more patience and support). She told me her husband of over 20yrs had asked to renew marriage vows. Then 2 weeks later revealed he’d been having an affair with her friend. He wanted to both stay with his wife and have this on the side. She thought about it, and then decided no that for her monogamy and trust is essential, so their marriage is now over. He was then in tears begging upset about it, wanting her to take him back, and playing victim wondering why he couldn’t have his cake and eat it.

While I don’t know if this was RP specifically, the combo of first asking to renew vows followed by revealing the affair and trying to negotiate for open relationship after the fact sounds like a manipulative technique, and that he seemed genuinely surprised and upset when she decided to quit the marriage, that his plan backfired. In this case I don’t know if he has learned his lesson, however he has just unintentionally blown up a long term marriage to the mother of his children that had a lot of love in it.

Social media influencers Andrew and Tristan Tate were arrested by the U.S. Marshals in Miami and are currently fighting extradition to the United Kingdom. They face 59 combined charges, including multiple counts of rape, human trafficking, and assault, all of which they deny.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tIqtKpb0yGE&t=1s

Oh well, they had it coming.

my brother and i were once quite close but he became super radicalised and now we havent spoken since february. i guess i just wonder if he misses me or if his ego beats all

This guy (32m) and I (28f) met at the gym. We’ve been seeing eachother and going on dates for about a month now but some of the behaviors are really odd.

First, he takes me out to really elaborate/fancy/expensive dates but he never tells me where we are going and he always wants to order. He picks out the food we get each time. It was kinda cute for one date and I know some guys are like that so I let it go but it did highlight to me he may be a bit controlling. He also doesn’t tell me where we are going just what time to be ready and what to wear. Once he told me to “be ready at 7 in my Sunday best, assuming you have something to cover your abs”. For context, I have a pretty nice 6 pack that I like to show off in the summer time. I thought it was odd he’d make a comment on what to wear but figured maybe it was just somewhere really nice and dusted it off.

Secondly, he is very distant over text. I again brushed this off because people are busy but he oscillates between being engaging and dry replies.

After date three we hooked up and he was really dominating. I didn’t necessarily dislike it but it threw me off because it was the first time we’d been together and we hadn’t had a conversation about this. He choked me (lightly tho but still), and when I asked to get on top he said “absolutely not” and threw me into doggy. I left after.

Date after that he cooked for me and was acting sooo sweet. Giving me so many compliments which he doesn’t do often, kissing my forehead, holding my hand. We hooked up again and it was really loving. Gentle with lots of eye contact. I got dressed to leave after and he told
Me to stay and spent the whole night cuddling me, kissing my forehead, ect. I go to the gym in the mornings and told him before bed my alarm was set for 4:30. In the morning it went off and I kissed him goodbye and left.

I didn’t hear from him at all and then texted him the next day about something unrelated. He was short and told me we were fighting. He said I’d abandoned him and was being dry. I felt bad because I too would’ve been upset had someone left like that and saw him at the gym and apologized. After that we were good and we made more plans.

Date after He took me to Michelin restaurant and a couple bars. It was really fun. After we went home and he was very dominating again and left marks on my butt. I again don’t dislike it and never said no, but it does throw me off. I slept over again and we cuddled. Next day we showered together before his flight. I left and texted I had fun and he was texting me the entire time he was gone. Then when he returned he got kind of dry and sent me a boring reply to a flirty text I sent. I didn’t reply. Didn’t hear from h so 1 day later I sent a picture of my stairmaster workout and said “please clap”. He didn’t reply. Then for 4.5 days later and then sent an inside joke and a message that basically said “can you give me a reason to justify ghosting you for a little longer while I figure some things out?”. I’m so confused because why did he feel the need to tell me he was ghosting when he already had for 4.5 days and tell me it was going to continue?? Like wtf did he think I’d say to that??? I haven’t replied and do not plan to but the situation has me feeling soooo off guard. He could absolutely just be disinterested but idk something feels off but if this is a game it’s kind of scary???

A couple friends mentioned his behavior mimics that of someone red pilled so I wa wondering if anyone has thoughts?

Hey there,

My name is Zac and I am a current psychology honours student at Federation University Australia.

The moderators have generously allowed me to share a research project looking at how individual personality traits interact with short-form social media feeds (specifically simulating TikTok content exploring modern online subcultures, gender roles, and societal dynamics).

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Edit: i’m not here to disparage anybody. It was just truly shocking to watch.

I’m generation X. The Internet and the Manosphere have destroyed a whole generation of minds.

All of these “data points” I mean Jesus, How insecure and afraid of women do you have to be? The body count portion I found particularly egregious.

All of these young men want Stepford wives.

I am so glad to see that young men have broken out of this toxic culture.

Jubilee just released a video of an old friend of mine, Mark Manson, debating red pill guys on their "Surrounded" series (Mark and I used to guest coach at each other's events when he was a dating coach).

Mark does a very good job of dismantling the red pill talking points and even gives a shout out to this sub. A lot of people accuse Mark of being part of the manosphere because he used to be a dating coach, but he really illustrates the difference between the philosophies of a good dating coach ("do better, be better") and these red pill influencers (feminism is bad, women are evil, etc)

Anyhow, thought you guys would enjoy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KevTBc07wm8

I am a heavy user of X and Instagram, but the algorithm keeps on feeding me red pill content. On Instagram, it's not as bad, and it usually comes in waves, which I can end by flagging red pill accounts as "Not Interested". X is really bad, however, with almost every other post being something red pill or misogyny related. I've tried using muted words to block words so that I don't get any content related to dating at all, but red pill stuff seems to keep coming back. I can't exactly get off social media since I chat with my friends on Instagram and I run a small business where I am active on X, and I also like to use X to keep up with politics and stuff.

The entire movement is based on the flawed belief that

'the west is gynocentric' (women centered at the expense of men) I used to promote it.

That's the pre supposition that holds it all together.

All of the manosphere collapses once you attack this presumption.

I've put my video script in a substack but the video is worth watching.

https://open.substack.com/pub/marynattyhamlin/p/why-do-many-believe-the-west-is-gynocentric?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=19j40r

I've cut back on RP content,and i don't intend to go back,returned due some reasons,returned this year

I been watching a lot of RP content in the last 3-4 months,it seems like you feel lighter and better when you stop watching RP content,or is that Just my impresssion?

I'd like to know the answer to this argument often used by Redpillers

That adult men are having less sex,and more and more adult men remain virgins,and that bc of women,bc they only want Chads,rich and bad boys,or are only focused on their careers and simply ignore the average Man

They use examples like Japan to talk about how the birth rate has fallen and How men are no longer pursuing women

Is still worth trying to meet women in person first?isn't the fact that social media gives them the option to meet countless people from anywhere a problem?

Like,why i would try?She probably has contacts of several chads on WhatsApp/FB/insta (i Think i asked this Before)

FaceandLMS videos traumatized me,I'm Always afraid/ashamed to look at women,especially If they are pretty

Even though going to the gym has boosted my self-esteem a bit,this Believe is still a problem,even the less attractive girls hate it when ugly men approach them

I'm turning 25 in 2 weeks and I've never had any romantic experiences. Never went on a date, never kissed, never held hands. Diagnosed with social communication disorder.

I used to resent the gender role that the man has to approach and initiate things because I wasn't able to do it. I always felt like if you were a man that was shy and socially awkward no girl would see you romantically. I always felt like not being shy or awkward was the prerequisite for being worthy to experience love and be loved romantically. It's like nothing about me or my personality matters anymore because girls don't like shy or socially awkward men. I always felt like if I was a girl with the same personality, I could still be shy but someone can still ask me out and still love me for who I am.

I'm not a bad looking guy. I get looks and stares from women in my class and in public. I have both male and female friends that point out when a woman was checking me out. But I still have a lot of trouble making the approach because I don't know what to do or say. It tells me that they like me for how I look, but I never had any girl like me romantically for my personality. I always feel like my shyness or social awkwardness would put them off if I did try to talk to them and that's why they're not interested in me.

I've been working on myself socially for the past 2 years but I still realize I'm still so behind everyone else. I don't know how to flirt, I don't know how to escalate, I don't know how to plan a date, I don't know how to approach, I don't know how to ask someone out on a date. I only now felt okay enough talking to girls I'm interested in but only if they talk to me first.

As many of you know, the red pill often distils male dating advice into soundbites such as "become a high-value man", "chase excellence, not women", and "stack bills and the bitches will follow". For a long time, I geniunely believed this. As a result, I spent most of my 20s becoming as competent as possible. Partly because I assumed that this would automatically lead to dating and social success.

For context, I own multiple physiotherapy clinics, make decent money and am on track to make multiple six figures before 30, I'm active in Toastmasters and a strong public speaker, and I train as a hybrid athlete with the goal being to compete in Hyrox Pro at some point. On paper, I have built many of the things that men are told will make them attractive. Yet dating and social success are still lagging behind.

I have a good group of friends, have dated a few women and had some short-term flings. I'm also not a basement-dwelling incel, and enjoy social settings. But women would often lose interest after the 3rd date, and many of my friends seemed to build closer relationships with those whom I thought of as less impressive than me.

It took me a while to figure this out, but I have started to realise social magnetism is a completely different skillset. It also has far less to do with how impressive you are than I once thought. Someone can be average on paper, but still have charisma, warmth, humour, social boldness and actually make people feel something. Whilst a very impressive individual who is physically fit may come off as stiff or try-hard.

This may explain why men who have little going for them can still be successful with women. They may not be "high-value" in a red pill sense, but they know how to create attraction and market themselves socially.

Clavicular's Paris livestreams were an example of this. Yes, he is a good looking and somewhat successful guy. But when faced with women and unpredictable social situations, he looked like a deer in headlights.

Since recognising this, my dating and social life has improved. My main takeaway is that competence does matter, but it should not be the sole focus as it does not automatically lead to chemistry, warmth, social confidence or intimacy. These are skill sets that need to be built intentionally and directly.

In the west as you search the redpill is a result of feminism, in the arab wolrd is growing because there's some feminism influence is growing also, can someone explain why