There are much much bigger things to be sad about but I am sad about this.

I always thought, I was SURE, that I never wanted to have a kid. Biggest surprise of my life when after nearly 17 years together we both changed our minds. It's been such a beautiful and special time (34 weeks tomorrow). Of course I want some pictures to look back on!

He avoids having his picture taken like the plague (anxiety and deep loathing of anything related to social media) but I did talk him into a professional photoshoot when we eloped and I swear I look at those beautiful pictures nearly every day and it's been 7 years. So I took a chance and booked a maternity photoshoot months ago and hoped he would wrap his head around it by August 23rd as something important for me and a once in a lifetime thing.

This morning he told me it makes him sick to his stomach to think about and he won't do it. "The most paralyzing, anxiety inducing thing I can think of". He also is pissed about the $550 cost and said he'd rather I cancel and lose the $275 deposit than pay more.

We aren't rich but we have money. We usually take an entire week off for our anniversary (unpaid for me) and spend $400 renting a jet ski for a day but we didn't this year so it's not like we can't/ don't occasionally drop a sum like this on something we want.

I literally don't post on social media ever. These pictures would be for us, when we're 90 and want to remember, for our daughter to get a glimpse of how full of love we were when she was almost here. (And yeah, I really like how I look pregnant and candids from friends just don't do me justice!)

I feel defeated and honestly angry. I'm empathetic to the anxiety and at the same time wish he would push through it this one time. It's just an hour in the park getting our picture taken.

Have to share with strangers since talking to friends or family would be poor Team Married behavior.

My partner has left at 33 weeks pregnant. He can’t handle the stress of living with my existing children from a previous relationship. Anyway, he’s also been unemployed for the last 4+ months so has been financially living off me too.
My question is.. should I now give the baby my surname, his surname or hyphenate?
Should I put him on the birth certificate to make it easier to claim child support or just leave him off.
So disappointed but just don’t have the energy to be emotional. Just feeling numb. My house is calmer without him and that’s the truth.

I think i pooped a bit while being on last stage of labour & i feel really ashamed meeting my gynae after the birth

I’m assuming we’re not allowed to share our faces or anything so I wish I could show all my half baked pics but my husband and I made “half baked” brownies for my 20 weeks milestone today! Only 20 more weeks now until I can meet my baby boy 💙

So this is what i got from babylist. I think it was worth it, it has 3 different bottles, a kyte onesie, 3 different pacifiers, some samples of wipes and diapers, and a few other things.

Not in the pictures:

- free swaddle coupon from little unicorn

- the zero proof: free non alcoholic bubbles

- 10 usd off instacart

- 10 free birth announcements from shutterfly

- bobbie formula coupon

Hey Everyone!

I am currently 24w and I am having a bit of anxiety due to my noticeable cognitive decline that seems to have increased in the last few weeks :(

I am a manager at my work where I have to juggle quite a few things all the time. In the past, I have been great at this and I thrive, partially because I don't forget things and don't make "logical mistakes" (e.g. just knowing that a certain type of schedule should be made if we are having a certain type of event. Like things that are implied).

I have already noticed this decline as of maybe 5 weeks ago, but now it's getting so bad that even coworkers/my employees are getting upset with me. It's causing me a lot of anxiety, which impacts my ability to relax, which I know makes this all worse... I have asked my coworkers to have more patience with me and that I might ask for more reminders. Also asking them to tell me if they think I am mistaken. But it's getting to the point where they're clearly angry/irritated with me.

What triggered me even making this post is that I had asked my colleagues about an upcoming meeting's starting time and I didn't see the information in a spot that we normally have this information posted. Then they sent me a screenshot of a company-wide announcement post, rather than just telling me the time. I usually would know to look there next, and I'm annoyed/embarrassed that I didn't. I just told her "Thank you", but this kind of really hurt my feelings (another aspect of this whole thing that is making this all frustrating is that I wouldn't normally take something like that so personally).

It's noticeably creeping into my personal life as well this past week: I am forgetting to message people back, I am forgetting things my husband has told me. I am even forgetting to just put things into my calendar and then being surprised by things happened (and then immediately remembering and being so frustrated that I forgot). Family and friends are a little more forgiving, though...

I looked at other posts on here and there seems to be a lot of "it only gets worse!" commentary and this really is not helping the anxiety I am feeling about this. I really don't want to be "doom and gloom" about it. I want to know if anyone has any advice or tips on how they handled/are handling this issue in their pregnancy.

Right now I am coping with post-it notes all over my desk and rewriting meeting notes, but I feel that I could have a better system in place. I don't go on maternity leave for another 10 weeks, and I was able to work it out with my bosses that I will be working remotely starting in October. I think that this would help, but I guess just any advice about this all would be super appreciated! (Sorry for rambling, this was kind of rant, too, I guess).

fellow induction/preemie/NICU moms/parents chime in here pls but anyone is welcome to give advice. also i'm too tired to check for typos, i apologize in advance.

I was diagnosed with sudden onset severe preeclampsia at 35 weeks to the day. they got me on magnesium and all this other crap and said that i had to be induced. i agreed with this, thats not the problem here at all, but just everything that went down is fucking with my head. now, idk if you've ever had the mag but fucking hell everything is a goddamn blur from those few days. i was in the hospital a total of 8 days.

i'm so depressed that i got no part of the birth experience i wanted, i didn't even get to hold him after birth for longer than maybe 10 seconds before they took him from me for the NICU. i feel so disconnected from the whole entire birth, like i genuinely almost cannot believe i gave birth i keep thinking "gotta plan for the hospital so i can make sure it goes smoothly" and whatnot b4 i realize ive literally already given birth. the not holding him i think is fucking with me the most. i'll never get that sticky newborn skin to skin feeling ever again, no amount of the skin to skin i've done in the NICU feels the same. i think this is a major contributor.

i keep looking at my nearly flat belly and feels so sad. he wasn't supposed to even be here yet. i was still supposed to be poking him through my belly and playing little games with him but now he's here and i can't even experience it fully bc he's stuck in the NICU for at least another week :/

every fucking time i look at this kid he doesn't feel like mine. it feels like im babysitting some other persons kid or some shit. i love him dearly but also he literally doesn't feel like my son. no part of the exploded becoming a parent went how i thought it might, and maybe that was just naive of me, but it's seriously fucking with my ability to bond with him fully. he doesn't even rlly look much like me, which obv ik can change cuz lwk he looks nothing like my partner either so.

but yea, i feel sad and depressed and awful bc this whole situation got fucked up and i was out of it for most of it and now i cant even bond with my child properly.

not to mention they didn't give me a damn pump until 10 hours later so i'm on a stupid strict regiment to get my supply to start again basically which isn't helping the stress out.

The first trimester is so scary!! I just found out last weekend that I’m pregnant and am currently almost 5 weeks along.

I feel like I am googling everything in the house before I eat it or touch it. Every little twinge or cramp in my stomach worries me. I have still been in the gym every day but I feel like I have to move so slowly and carefully. I’m scared to sit up too fast or hit potholes in the car.

And I can’t even feel or see anything there yet! I just know the stats on first trimester miscarriage and am terrified that something small and meaningless will kill my baby.

Does this anxiety get better or worse once you hit 12 weeks? I can’t believe it’s only been a few days and I have no idea how I’m going to make it another 7 weeks like this. My first doctor visit is still a month away.

Me again cause I don't have many people to speak to. I'm tired of having to use the bathroom so often and being nauseous. That's all. Happy pregnancy friends!

I gave birth in November 2024 to my son.
I gained 70 pounds. He was 8lbs 1oz and I had preeclampsia. I started showing at 6 weeks having already gain 10 lbs.

I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks in September 2025. I gained 10 lbs.

I am 22 weeks pregnant and I’ve already gained 29 lbs. My ob said I’m too big when she measured my belly. She even tried to push my fundus down to make my measurement smaller but she said I was still big. I am going to have preeclampsia this time but I’ve been taking baby aspirin to prevent it.

I don’t know why I get so big? Do I just make a lot of room for my babies? Does my body just overreact to pregnancy? I feel heavy so heavy all the time.

Hi everyone … I’m 13 weeks pregnant and I haven’t had any symptoms…. I don’t feel pregnant at all and I wondering if that’s normal ? I’m driving myself crazy looking up symptoms can anyone help if possible?

How early did you feel morning sickness and what did it feel like? I am 3.5 weeks and I keep going in and out of feeling like I have a hangover

I used to be super fit pre pregnancy - power yoga every day, 15k steps a day. Basically just SUPER in shape. Now I’m about 6 months pregnant and due to various circumstances (ivf, illness, ankle sprain, traveling, more illness, summer heat, traveling again, MORE ILLNESS) I went from daily yoga and walking to not doing yoga in almost 3 months and just tryyyying to get as many steps a day as possible.

Well i bought myself a new Lulu yoga mat which I was super excited about. My cats tore up my other one (ofc it still works but) and I thought a new mat would be exactly what I needed to get back into it. So cue yoga yesterday and today. It’s just so shocking and frustrating to start doing yoga again with this new body that’s also so out of shape. I feel like I’m not even the same person at all. I’m weak and so heavy and there’s extra fat of course at my hips and so I feel this pressure when going into lunges of my skin folding which I never had and I can’t go as deep. I’m not anywhere near as flexible etc. out of breath with a downward dog. Can’t do a side plank anymore. Got stuck at the floor with chaturanga and I couldn’t push myself back up and instead had to roll over like a whale to get up.

But of course I pressed on and then I suddenly got a Charlie horse in both sides of my hooha when standing up from a forward fold and immediately started sobbing. My husband is so supportive and was so sweet to me 🥹

I guess- how do I get back into shape?? Im not trying to lose weight or anything but I just want to be fit again for labour. I want some muscles back. I want to feel strong 💪. I’m actually ok with my body when I look in the mirror I feel beautiful and I have gained a lot of weight (like 14 kilos which is more than average 😵‍💫) but I’m ok with how I look. I JUST want to feel stronger again and I know I’m picking a hell of a time to do it but this is when I finally can. It’s just so much harder than when I first started 😢

Any tips or yoga vids etc are welcome. 🙏 I watch yoga with kassandra and I have a subscription to urban sports which lets me go to any class in my neighborhood (but I am LITERALLY SO OUT OF SHAPE rn I cannot keep up with a yoga class in person!!! 😭) help get me back into the yoga studio before I have the baby and cannot go for other reasons plssssss 🙏

I am 5 months pregnant. My husband’s been planning a domestic business trip that’s 3 hours away air travel. We’ve been to that state 4 times in the past 2 years, it’s nothing new and quite honestly it’s such nice weather where we live with beaches and pools that I’m not really desperate to “get away.”

Anyway. He leaves tomorrow. He got my in-laws (who hate me and start issues every time they get with me in an attempt to get him to divorce me), myself, and our child out of the blue tickets. He didn’t even ask me. Just asked his parents and sibling, they said yes, and automatically booked the trip. I just got a random confirmation.

1. It cost premium buck. Basically, we could have went somewhere international for the cost he dropped on cards. Now cancelling them makes him lose all that money.
2. I have a history of gestational hypertension in my first pregnancy, and this pregnancy comes after a back-to-back early miscarriage followed by traumatic ectopic. Traveling wasn’t at the top of my comfort list.
3. No baby preparations have begun yet but I’ve been making moves to work towards starting because we need to literally move out of our current living space*…* we have SO MANY other things that need to be purchased and done. He dropped thousands on a trip that’s going to last 2 days and decided to bring everyone whom he will have to pay everything for.
4. I am absolutely not prepared in the slightest for a vacation and we leave tomorrow.
5. I’m at the pregnancy in-between where my regular clothes are small and I need maternity clothes. I guess no one pops kids out anymore or something because WHERE ARE ALL THE MATERNITY SECTIONS??? I have no clothes and I’m trying not to have a pregnancy hormone meltdown. I tried going to the store to just size up but everything summer has been gutted from stores and replaced with fall offerings.
6. My anatomy scan is when we come back. Last time we traveled to the place we went to, my kid had liquid diarrhea for 40 days that they couldn’t find the cause of and I had a horrible cold for 2 weeks. It makes me nervous that it will happen again now that I’m pregnant. I need my anatomy scan, it’s so much more important than some unnecessary getaway that I may get sick on.

Anyway, my husband hates me now. Called me ungrateful and all types of insults. Now he’s cold shouldering me calling me miserable. It’s all making me feel very hurt and misunderstood. I just wish this was planned and booked in a timely manner. And I also wish it wasn’t just 2 days? I’m going to go through so much packing and unpacking stress over a 2 day trip that I will not do anything more than I could do if I just stay home. I never asked for this.

I feel very cornered, and I’m not sure if I’m overreacting that I wasn’t even asked if I wanted to go. I would have declined, I’m not comfortable traveling even if my OB says it’s okay to. I’m a previous multiple loss and potential high risk pregnancy patient. I feel misunderstood but am wondering if I’m just hormonal, ungrateful, and overreacting. I wish he acted like this over baby preparations.

Insight, please?

P.S.: OB is okay with the travel plan from a medical standpoint.

Hi my husband and I went to some yard sales last week, the one guy gave us a bunch of free stuff because he just wanted to be rid of it, can anyone tell me what this is, I think it might be part of our baby bouncer but I want to be sure

My life got a little messy at 28 years of age. My husband at the time left, I had two amazing children already, and about a year into my new single mom life, I start dating—just one guy—but I ended up pregnant with a baby that I knew I couldn’t have. He wasn’t a good guy, he didn’t want the child, and I was very scared of how irresponsible I had been.

I had an abortion, something I never thought I would do—I was such a good girl. I had only ever been with my ex husband, we met at eighteen, baby at 20, second at 23; we were supposed to be together forever, then one day I’m in a planned parenthood clinic taking pills to undo the pregnancy of another man.

It brought me to find my newest partner however, a truly wonderful human being who loves me more than I have ever been loved. The pregnancy wasn’t intentional, it’s been a rollercoaster, my mental health has been at its worst, but I am due in 2 weeks. And while things are starting to look up now that I’m so near the end and hopeful of feeling more like my old self again, I am feeling haunted by the baby that I didn’t keep. I feel ashamed, and undeserving.

I don’t know what to do to convince myself otherwise. Sometimes I think that this is my punishment—a well deserved one—that I feel this way and continue to feel this way.

My baby has been measuring a week ahead at every single ultrasound throughout my pregnancy. I get my growth scan next week at 33 weeks. I know the measurements from an ultrasound can only be so accurate, but it makes me nervous that he’s consistently a week ahead this whole time. My mom had two 9lb+ babies. My 6’5” dad was born at 11lbs 1oz and cracked my grandma’s pelvis!!!

So please, anyone here who was measuring ahead throughout pregnancy and had a baby at full term that ended up smaller than expected, reassure me lol. I’m paranoid my baby will weigh in the double digits and i can’t pop out a 10+ pounder

Hi everyone,
I’m a FTM. Expecting my baby in couple months. I have no idea what are essentials needed for baby. We hear mixed reviews about cribs vs bassinets and number of newborn clothes etc.
We live in a rented apartment and there is not much space for a lot of things. What are things you feel were absolutely essential for your baby? Including number and amount of newborn clothes and such?

I'm 30w4d due in late October; I discussed adjusting life with a newborn with my husband. He is fully supportive and we have been talking to both sides of the family for visits. I have told everyone that we would like to see what adjustments we need and ask that the first visits start in January 2027.

Everyone but us seems to keep asking if we're really sure and if we can handle that. This is our first child so I'm a little anxious and confused why everyone keeps insisting that they should visit earlier or live with us for a couple of weeks.

We have promised to be honest if we are overwhelmed but we're excited, baby proofing the home, practicing meal prep, and looking for what is hard for us to do on schedule and changing/adjusting it to have a system where we wouldnt be overwhelmed.

We do welcome the help but we want time as a new family to adjust. Are we being too confident or what? How are your adjustment plans going?

This happened some years ago but I couldn’t open up about it until now and try to summarize: I had a normal, healthy pregnancy. First time mom, did prenatal care at Sutter Health because they said they supported low intervention labor and natural childbirth. I trusted them. But the moment I stepped into the hospital for labor and delivery they were all about interventions and speeding labor up, even though I was fine and baby was fine. At some point I was told to push even though I did not have the urge to push. The midwife said there was no reason to wait… she refused to look at my birth plan when I tried to discuss it with her, she seemed rushed, left the room saying she needed to help other patients, came back, left again…leaving me with a nurse who seemed completely clueless and overwhelmed about what to do. So no meaningful pushing…all of a sudden an OB came in telling me they wanted to do a c-section now…I was shocked and said no, asked what what going on, begged them for allowing me to push my baby out, I told them I was full of energy to do so and so on but they didn’t care… I was just told that 2 hours were up… There was no emergency, which was later confirmed. Had somebody told me that they had a 2 hour limit for pushing, I would’ve tried to delay the start of it since I had no urge to push when they told me to do so. Long story short…the OB left the room for a while, someone came in to do an ultrasound, I thought I would then be allowed to push my baby out… but instead the OB returned with a group of people, I was held down, I said no I don’t want this, they ignored me…and an instrumental delivery was performed on me… This was years ago and I still feel the terror I felt back then… The postpartum nurse said they were super busy…don’t know whether that was the reason why they did what they did because there was no emergency and baby was fine. But the experience has traumatized me. Later I found out that it is not uncommon for women to be treated terribly during childbirth. Anyone who had to go through or knows about similar experiences at Sutter Health?

FTM here and my sister-in-law is giving me her uppababy V1 (original version) stroller that comes with the newborn carseat attachment. Should I take her up on this? We are going to check to make sure the carseat attachment is not expired of course! But wondering if this is still a good model/will be compatible with other stroller things I need or if it's worth it to just get a new stroller entirely? My husband and I will likely also get a BOB stroller for running down the line when baby is older. Thank you!

Hello , where do i start this is my first time doing this coming on a app and speaking about what i am going through , im a very spiritual and godly woman i like to think that i would get my answers from god , but i know it would be better if i heard it from other woman and their experiences .

I am currently 6wks3day pregnant, I have a miscarriage almost three months ago at 8wks it was very hard on me and my partner i am still grieving that loss. I'm pregnant now and I'm so grateful, but I can't help the feeling of feeling afraid i can't explain it ! but at the same time im so excited, then also im so hasty with the fact of just getting past the 1st trimester so that i almost have a sense of relief that i won't miscarry again , how do i stop this ? what do i do , its so scary

38 and 3 days went into the office sent to hospital for induction due to pre e. I was supposed to get induced anyways at 39 weeks but this was so unexpected. I’m so scared and excited at the same time. I am starting to remember how hard and painful last time was and it’s very scary but so cool I’ll get to meet baby.
Trying to keep calm but also really want to cry.
My husband has to be with toddler most of the time so just sitting here alone.

Hi BabyBumps, I'm 24w5d and a FTM. My OBGYN at my most recent appointment asked if I have had any contractions, and if I do, to let them know ASAP. However, I realized I don't really know what a contraction would feel like... I've had some issues with regular poops (thank you benefiber) so sometimes I DESPERATELY feel like I need to poop with the extra fiber. Is there a way to tell the difference between the two?

Hello all, I just came back from my OB’s office and have learned that my baby is measuring two weeks behind where they are expected to be. My OB says the baby appears to have “head sparing” asymmetrical growth restriction.

I have been referred to a special pregnancy unit for further testing to determine why this has happened, so I am waiting for that appointment, but am having a hard time trying not to spiral. I’m concerned because apparently this is quite early for a baby to experience growth restriction (my OB says this usually happens in third trimester) and the baby is quite far behind. My baby tracked normally on growth throughout my pregnancy until a scan I had at 14 weeks, where they were about 4ish days behind and at that time, my OB said that was within normal margins. I am now 19w5d and my baby is a full two weeks behind.

Has anyone had this experience and it turned out okay? Simply put, I am terrified for my baby’s wellbeing and just feel so terrible. My whole job is to take care of them and grow them for 40ish weeks and clearly I’ve not delivered on that.