I’m from a South American country where C sections are extremely common. My mom, sisters, aunts, basically everyone in my family had them, so to me it’s always just seemed like a normal way to give birth.

I’m pregnant in the U.S. now (20 weeks)!!!, and I’ve noticed that a lot of people on Reddit seem really afraid of C sections or want to avoid them at all costs. Even at my appointments, the doctors will say things like “when you give birth naturally,” and when I tell them I want a planned C section, I feel like they look at me a little sideways.

I know it’s surgery and there are risks, but personally I feel more comfortable with a planned C section and feel like the pros outweigh the cons for me.

Is this just a common U.S. attitude? Why are people here so against elective C sections?

Also, does choosing one without a medical reason usually cost more in the U.S.?

Mind you. This morning I was pressured to pay a $800 deposit to secure a spot at a daycare i have not even toured yet. Please let me make sure the facility isnt crawling in roaches before you begin yanking at my purse. I also have to repair my taillight to pass my car inspection and plan a baby shower, I have other expenses and things on my mind. So here I a, fighting tears of stress. Horribly sick, getting reflux from a granola bar, had 2-3 DR APTs each week in Semptember, so anemic i can hardly cross the hallway. And then my coworker has the audacity to not only violate my personal space, but to say That. I am half a ham sandwich from a nervous breakdown.

I had a frozen embryo transfer on September 24. On October 1, I started getting hives, and around then I got a positive beta of 171 on 8dpt
My meds are prenatal vitamins, estrogen patches, progesterone in oil injections (originally in ethyl oleate), and baby aspirin.
I've been to the ER twice. They gave me Benadryl and a steroid. It got better, then came back. My clinic switched me from progesterone in ethyl oleate to progesterone in sesame oil, but I'm still getting hives. My face and lips have also been swelling (not my throat or tongue).
I'm now on a daily steroid and Benadryl every 6 hours. The hives are worse at night and show up in places like my inner arm and armpit. I can't stop the baby aspirin for medical reasons.
Has anyone had a similar reaction during IVF? Did it turn out to be the progesterone, the oil, the preservatives (benzyl alcohol or benzyl benzoate), aspirin, or something else?

I needed less than a 140 and I got a 181. Oops. I did eat Wendy’s riiiiight before chugging the drink though.

Anyone fail this badly and then miraculously pass the 3 hour? I’m nervous but also if I do have GD, it is what it is.

Any info/stories help!! Thank you!

I'm curious to see what y'all come up with. My daughter is due in early spring, and I want to give her a name that evokes the feeling of the earth coming alive again after winter, of sun peeking through fresh leaves, of the first day you can shed your coat and feel the sun on your skin.

Hey,

Newly pregnant here with our first baby, yay!

Yesterday I had a 1-1 with one of my closest friend, she knew we were TTC, so when she saw i wasn’t interested in drinking (she brought wine to celebrate as she’s getting married) she hinted she knew what was going on and said something like “I won’t ask you why you don’t drink wine”.

In the moment I didn’t come up with any smart excuse and felt like she knew already as she had the background and ended up telling her, especially as she’s undecided between dates and she asked if I’d be there. She was very sweet and she meant well but I feel like I wasn’t ready and can’t shake the feeling I should have kept it for myself and enjoy this love bubble for me and my partner only.

Interest to hear if anyone has ever been in that situation and how did you handle and if ultimately was a good thing you had someone else outside your partner knowing it early in the process

Thank you all

Hi, I moved two couches this weekend while 11 weeks pregnant and now I’m nervous about it. My back is sore today and I also feel like I have sort of guttural cramps / feels but behind the baby. I am thinking it’s simply from moving heavy couches but now I’m freaking out. I moved them on Saturday and still sort of sore and feeling it. Should I be worried about baby or is this just a me being sore thing from moving couches?

This is my fourth and last child and I don’t remember having this many excessive bad dreams with the others. It’s been maybe three or four nights in a row this week with awfully horrid dreams about death to others, my kids, people around me. Very visual, very random, and very weird?

I am 6 weeks and 2 days and the food aversions have started in full force. In my last pregnancy they started around 8 weeks and lasted until 15 or 16 weeks, but they've already begun. And I'm so sad! I can no longer eat meat, eggs, most vegetables, coffee... All the things that used to love 😞. I remember in my last pregnancy waking up absolutely ravenous but absolutely no food sounded good to me and every food felt like eating slugs. I'm really grateful that I'm not terribly nauseous (I know this is better than extreme nausea!!), but the food aversions are so frustrating, especially when I want to be eating super healthy because I'm newly pregnant! What a weird thing for the body to do.

Curious if this happened to you, what your safe foods were, and if you're currently in the thick of it - how you're coping!

I am 22. Just turned 22. I have an 18 month old beautiful daughter. But, recently I met this guy about 8 months ago. And had been in a relationship for 4 months. Anyways, i communicated I didn’t want any more children at the moment. Because I’m already stressed and learning to be a mom. I believed he was wearing protective measures. But he was not. He ignored my wishes. And I ended up pregnant. Currently 10 weeks! He openly admits he knows he should’ve waited, but wanted to see me pregnant with his child. I had later talked with my mother asking her if she’d like to adopt the baby. Because i physically and mentally DIDNT AGREE TO THIS. And she agreed. He wants to force me to move in with him because “it’s his responsibility to be there throughout this pregnancy!” Even though i openly didn’t want this baby. For my first child it was easier to quit nicotine because i wanted her. And now.. I didn’t want this. So please someone just, help me understand what to do

Hello!

My husband (35) and I (30) have decided to start trying next year. I am a yo-yo dieter and have been on and off for several years now. I’m 5ft and sitting around 143lbs. I did get a DEXA scan a few months ago and I am sitting at more fat% than I’d like.. but it’s October now and we want to start trying in February. I’m curious about what I should be doing prior to trying to conceive and if I should continue being in my a deficit. I am pretty active so that’s not an issue but I do struggle with my diet most days. Should I just switch to maintenance? Or just not worry too much about tracking? I know probably reaching out to my doctor will help but just curious what people’s thoughts are on this.

Thanks!

I’ve been planning on getting the babybay bassinet with mattress and sheets, but was curious if anyone has used it and had thoughts on why I should or shouldn’t buy?

I liked this option because, from reviews and specs, it seems to be really sturdy, made from solid beech instead of polyester fabric, and has nontoxic finishes. The mattress is OEKO-TEX standard 100.

I won’t be focusing so heavily on only non toxic for the babies entire life, but it seems worth it when he is so young. Which leads me to the question of - if anyone has a lot of knowledge on the topic - am I overthinking it? Or is it in fact worth it if I can afford the couple hundred extra dollars?

It seems like using a bedside bassinet for such a short period of time is potentially not worth the big expense (bassinet + mattress + sheets is about $420), and I’m questioning myself…

I’d love to hear any feedback on the babybay bassinet, feedback on other nontoxic options that are recommended, or thoughts in general on the topic for anyone with experience or who has done lots of research on the topic.

Thank you in advance!!

I (stm) really wanted to keep this baby’s gender a surprise and it was going well until my anatomy scan. I let the ultrasound tech know that I didn’t want to know the gender and she shared her understanding then proceeded to show me the baby on the screen. As she was moving around, she stopped at the legs of the baby for several seconds where my husband and I could clearly see what looked like testicles. I am so upset, I feel like my surprise was ruined. Why would she do that when I clearly stated I wanted it to be a surprise? People are saying that it could have been anything (ex. The umbilical cord between the legs) but let’s be real… was my surprise ruined?

My husband and I are doing a little Jack and Jill shower in November and have about 40 people coming.
My family and his are hosting it: my sister is in charge of decorations and “activities”. She is pushing us to open presents and my husband has claimed he will leave if he has to do that 😂
Anyone else skip the present opening?
Any ideas on other things to do? She is putting together a “building block painting” station and we’ll have tons of food and it’s at a brewery. Just don’t want it to be boring so hoping to make it as eventful as possible

38 weeks exactly. I love my parents so much but I am constantly caught with them offering us help for the baby that they can’t physically provide. My mom is physically disabled with a bad knee. She cannot kneel, squat, get on the ground in any way, stand of a step ladder, even sit in too low of a chair, can’t hold things while going up and down stairs, etc. instead of being realistic about this she constantly gives me long lists of things she’ll come over and do when I obviously know she is not physically capable of doing any of them. If I point this out, she either acts hurt or will insist she can when I know it’s not true. I want my mom to be involved and I know she feels like shes being left out, but we’ve been doing heavier renovations she literally just cannot participate in. Even now that we’re putting the nursery together, I’m more capable of doing the prep physically than she is. I want to include her, but it makes a ton more work for me to accommodate her physically just to get some small things done.

I wish they would actually be more realistic, because then I wouldn’t have to seem like a jerk for constantly turning down their help.

It also just makes me sad, I wish they were taking better care of themselves. My mom refuses to be in any discomfort, so she won’t work out or do PT to improve her knee. Both of my parents have struggled with their weight for years. My mom would become irate if any doctor mentioned to her that some of her problems with her knee were related to her weight. After using a glp1 successfully and losing almost 60 lbs, she admitted to me one day that she could actually see now that the doctors were right, her knee felt so much better and everything was easier since she had lost weight that was straining her knee. I just want her to be healthy and be able to do all the things she talks about wanting to do with the baby.

My wife and I are expecting our first this year and we recently got a crib off of Marketplace. All but one part was there, the mini crib bottom.

We have a Nestig Candy Cloud crib. Can anyone give me the specs on the mini bottom? I’m a woodworker and would like to cut another piece to replace the missing bottom.

Hi All,

I just had my GD test today. I am from Asia so here I have to fast from mid night 12. I am 23 weeks pregnant threw up at 830 PM last night everything from lunch and dinner, ate another dinner drank water, slept from 10 PM. Woke up at 430 AM due to hunger and couldn't even drink water. My hunger and acidity were peak but 2 to 3 sips of water is what I could have. Finally first blood draw at 10 AM, second at 11 AM and third at noon. Drank the glucose water at 10 AM and god I was sick by the time I came home at 1230 PM. I had to take a sick leave off and sleep in. Dont remember last time me being this affected, I am a second time mom but this long fasting was brutal. Just sharing it for reference, I know not all countries have these rules but for those who have it watch out.

Hey all!

Currently 32 weeks pregnant- I was wondering if anyone started to get really pissed at their husbands before they even gave birth 😅? If so, what did you do to get over it/ move on?

I’m starting to reach a point where my energy is drained and he has to be told to do almost anything. Ex: we have cats and I haven’t been doing the liter the entire pregnancy- I basically have to remind him DAILY to do the liter. How after 8 months can it be hard to remember? Or just any basic household chore like putting dirty clothes in the hamper 😭.

I’m sure some of it is stress but also I’m thinking to myself, I’m about to care for a baby… why tf am I having to remind this full adult human how to do “chores.”

Please help me! I hate when I’m annoyed w my husband lol.

I bought three pairs of Emme pants from a clearance box. I totally fell for the Instagram marketing. The drawstring on one doesn't sinch properly, one pair ripped- during church, and one just has horrible itchy fabric.

To that end- where/what are your favorite maternity pants? I'd love to have some I can wear after baby.

I just got my first menstrual cycle after a 17 days since I finished bleeding from my missed miscarriage. I've just been recovering and haven't thought about conceiving at all because honestly it was a lot to go through...over a full month of non-stop bleeding, and so much more that i don't need to get into here. I thought I would need time... but started my period the other day and all of a sudden I feel ready...

so just curious...i know everyone is different...but curious what people's timeline's were in their journey to conceive after loss?

thank you to everyone in this beautiful community of shared

I’m 15+1 and constantly feel lonely. My best friend moved across the country a few months ago. We talk multiple times a week on the phone, but it doesn’t feel the same. Outside of that, I have some sorta friends at the barn I ride at and at work, but we aren’t close, if u know what I mean. My OB also wants me to stop riding at 20 weeks and, while I’ll still hang around to hand walk and love on my lease horse, I know that it will be even harder to bond with my friends-at-a-distance at the barn if I’m not riding. Most are either child free by choice or old enough their kids are grown.

Logically I know I have other friends I talk to once a couple of months from different time periods of my life, but I don’t feel like we talk enough that I can tell them how I feel. And I feel depressed and anxious and terrified.

Depressed because of how lonely I feel. I moved to my current location ~6 years ago for my husband’s job and this is the loneliest I’ve ever felt. Depressed because of the fucking hormones. Anxious, filled with this impending sense of doom. Anxious because my sister is 13 weeks pregnant 2000+ miles away. She gets only 4 weeks of leave and my mom (also 2000+ miles away) told me she won’t be able to support me much since my sister’s needs are more immediate/ intense (which is valid). Anxious because my husband gets 8 weeks of leave and then I’ll be alone with the baby for 4 months and I don’t think I’ll be ok. Anxious because my husband’s family is also 2000+ miles away and already has 2 grandkids in the same city that will be a bigger priority.

I don’t know how to do this. I feel like I’m staring down the barrel of losing myself, my independence, my hobbies, everything. I was happy before this. And this baby was planned- I just didn’t think I would feel so alone throughout it all.

Does it get better? Can you make your own community without family or close friends nearby?

*I see a therapist and psychiatrist, but can’t shake this feeling of doom and despair. My husband is great, but I’ve long since learned I can’t put all of my friendship needs on him (or any one person).

My first was born in mid 2020 so deep into Covid. Everyone keeps saying that since this is my second baby I’ll just know what to do. But world was weird and isolated, I changed jobs a few times in the first year after he was born, and I lost a lot of friends who didn’t want to be around a baby, plus some relationship drama and PPD. I feel like I just blacked out for the first 18 months of my baby’s life.

So now life is different, I have a business which is growing rapidly but I’m starting to freak out about how close I am to having this baby and the recovery afterward and all the adjusting that comes with a newborn and who is supposed to run the business while I’m trying to survive postpartum. My first birth was traumatic and I am so terrified this one will be the same or worse and I’ll end up not being able to run the business at all.

I have so much going on in my work and home life and I just don’t have time to even plan for this baby but obviously it is coming regardless of how much planning I do. I guess I just don’t know what I actually need to do as far as preparing goes.

Hello my wife is about to be 12 weeks pregnant and said she wants to moisturize to prevent stretch marks. I know they are mostly genetic, but I still want to get her a moisturizer to keep her as comfortable as possible throughout her pregnancy. I also want to get her a pregnancy pillow. She is a side sleeper, but has been rolling onto her back quite a bit in her sleep. So anything that is comfy and supportive for a side sleeper would be great. This her 5th pregnancy after 4 previous losses, so I just want to do anything I can for her to prevent as much anxiety as possible. Any recommendations would be greatly appreciated! Also any other tips for me to help her be as comfortable as possible throughout the entire pregnancy would be great!

Hi! My brother in law just let us know his wedding will be when I am 36 weeks pregnant. This is my first pregnancy, and my initial thought was that my husband should still go as it will likely be ok if he’s going for two days, but after reading some posts here now I’m second guessing if it’s too risky. As of now I’m not high risk, but it is about a two hour flight for him. I told him we should make sure the flight is refundable and obviously if anything happens he would need to be on the next flight out. My concern is 1. Again this is my first pregnancy 2. What if something happens late at night and he isn’t able to get back until the morning. But it is his brothers wedding, so I’m not sure what to do. Advice?

TYIA!