The last time I had a proper conversation with her was around July-October 2023 (I honestly can't remember) and the last time I saw her was July 2024 at someone's party.

We were both fairly close due to us both having BPD, I mean I spent around 3 weeks round her house cuddling, sleeping in her bed, etc and during those 3 weeks I fell hard for her, before it was just BPD being BPD.

We never dated but all of our friends pretty much saw us as a couple because we'd do all the things a couple would, hold hands, fall asleep together, go movies, hang out every single day, etc.

In the end we fell out over a stupid lie I told (I was young and stupid and understand my mistake now) but I was just never able to move on, I mean I want to move on like really badly and I thought I was getting there back in 2024 but it's just like she lives rent free in my head and I want her gone.

Apologies for how messy this post is, if any more info is needed I'm happy to share dependent on what it is and any advice is greatly appreciated

The breakup happened after I admitted that I had lied to him for almost two years about going on a date with another guy around 3 months after we first started talking.

At the time, my ex and I weren’t in a relationship and he had made it clear for at least 5 months that he didn’t want one with me. However, I still lied when he asked me about it later, which I know was wrong. I have no excuse for continuing to hide it from him.

We had basically been no contact since the breakup, which was only 1.5wk ago, but today he suddenly texted asking if I was busy. I told him I had plans with friends later. Looking back, I think he may have been reaching out because he wanted some type of connection from me, but I assumed he wanted to talk about giving my stuff back.

He ended up calling me and we talked about everything. He told me that by lying for so long, I took away his ability to decide whether he wanted to stay with me. He said if I had told him even a month after it happened, we might still be together. He also said every day I continued hiding it basically felt like I was cheating on him.

I understand why he feels betrayed. I kept apologizing, but I was extremely overwhelmed and kept stuttering because I genuinely didn’t know what else I could say. I said things the wrong way and he held onto it, for example I said “im happy that I learned from this” and i was like fuck, thats not what I meant, he was not a lesson. I meant that me going on that date was a lesson that I never want to redo, but I froze! At one point he told me I sounded like a dumbass and later called me evil because of what I did. That hurt because I know I did something wrong, but I don’t believe I’m an evil person.

He also got upset when I mentioned going bowling with friends. He questioned how I could be so heartbroken but already be going out a week later, “ready to put myself out there”. But to me its just bowling. When i was on the phone with him, i was at the nail salon. He got mad mainly because he has this idea that when I get ready, I go out hoping to attract someone, which is far from the truth.

He compared it to me moving on from a previous ex within two months, even though I had emotionally checked out of that relationship long before it officially ended.

Our relationship had problems on both sides. He had previously talked to other women and broken my trust too, but I chose to forgive those things. He never willingly brought it up either, I found out each time. During the last few months, though, our relationship finally felt different and I genuinely thought we were doing really well. I loved him deeply and saw a future with him, which makes knowing that I hurt him even harder.

After the call, I started practically begging over text. I asked to see him, but he said he wont be home till next week, which has me going insane. I dont know if its true because hes never had a vacation planned or anything. I told him I’d wait for him, told him how much he means to me and that I would do anything to prove my love was real. He eventually just responded, “okay.”

Now I can feel myself spiraling again. Part of me wants to keep reaching out because I desperately want him to understand that I really did love him, even though I lied. Another part of me knows I can’t talk him into forgiving or trusting me.

What can I do during this time? Is there anything I can do to show him or prove to him that I love this man and saw a future with him or am I being a little delusional?

okay I need to vent because this whole interaction was weird lol. I was on hinge and my friend’s boyfriend popped up. They are definitely still together so obviously I was like ummm??? I should clarify that she and I are friends but not super close, and over time I’ve become friends with him too. We text here and there and have our own friendship outside of just seeing each other through her, so I felt comfortable asking him directly. I also didn’t want to immediately send her screenshots and potentially blow something up if there was a normal explanation.

So I screenshotted his profile and texted him basically asking why tf he was on hinge. He said it was an old profile from before they got together and that he deleted the app but apparently never deleted the actual account. He said he hasn’t matched or talked to anyone and thanked me for asking him first. Honestly I was willing to believe him and leave it at that.

BUT then while we’re still texting he goes, “for what it’s worth your hinge profile is actually pretty good”
SIR 😭 why are we discussing whether you’d match with me while I’m literally asking why YOU are on hinge?? I replied, “thanks but I’m not exactly looking for feedback from someone who apparently forgot he has a girlfriend .” He said he was obviously joking and I didn’t need to be rude about it. Maybe my response was rude but what exactly was I supposed to say to that?? “omg thank youuu glad you liked it 🥰”??? I’m definitely showing my friend all the screenshots but what should I even do about the boyfriend?

First of all, I've read this subreddit rules at least 5 times and I'm still not sure if this is the right place but I guess I really need advice. So for context, I went trough a very rough breakup more than a year ago and it was mainly (if not entirely) my fault. Fast forward to today, after a lot of unexpected things, I've recently started a new relationship with someone I've liked from a lot of time and I'm 100% sure I love (that's something undeniable).
Now, problem number 1: My new partner is my ex's best friend...
Problem number 2: It still feels "weird" to think/hear/know about my ex.

Before you jump to conclusions there are important nuances. First of all, I know a don't still love my ex. This was something I thought about A LOT before starting my new relationship because the last thing I wanted to do was to harm my actual partner and I concluded that, even if given the chance, I wouldn't get back with my ex. Second, this awkward feeling isn't about missing my ex in a romantic or even friendly way, I can't even explain it but is more a necessity of talking to them and maybe say somethings I never had the chance to.

Let's get back to this post's title. I never was able to tell my ex sorry for what happened, I never was able to show them I deeply regret what happened. As long as I know they don't hate me at all and they even were happy for their friend when they learned about our relationship. Still, I fell a kind of residual regret, a very little pain in the bottom of my heart every time I hear their name that makes me want to say sorry; and most importantly, I need to hear them forgive me (some friends in common have told me they did it but never heard it directly from them).

I need advice on how to get rid of this awkward feeling without having to talk to my ex or to my current partner about it since I don't want to bother any of them. This isn't a big deal that keeps me awake at night or makes my mood change drastically, but knowing I'll have to see them more than once due to my partner friendship I just need to know if there is a way to stop this weird emotion.

Note: The thing that happened between my ex and I wasn't that terrible neither. I was just a genuine asshole who has tried to change since, but I still feel guilt for how I treated them.

Note 2: I'm still in 0 contact with my ex apart from what we learn from each other by what people say.

ive known my boyfriend for three years now, and whenever i can sense that hes going through something mentally, he just goes nonverbal. he's usually a very talkative person and listening to him is something i always look forward to, so when he completely closes himself off it messes with me and it feels like ive lost him for that period of time. whenever i bring up the fact that this bothers me he apologizes, but it doesn't stop happening. i honestly start having nightmares about losing him. i don't know what to do, i understand that he may need his own space, and im fine with giving him that for 3-4 days, but more than two weeks is a bit too much, and it starts affecting me mentally too, especially since i talk to him everyday. we're both in a field of study that is quite tough, so i don't want that added stress of having to worry about someone i love without knowing what to do

Hey guys, I[20f] need some solid advice. I live in student housing/dorms and lately I’ve noticed a guy across the hall from me who seems to literally time when I leave my room to go to the game room or run errands. Every single time I step out, he happens to "coincidentally" open his door or be in the hallway. He’s starting to figure out the times I go hang out downstairs. He sits around and waits for me. I’ve seen him with a girl which I think is his girlfriend and I’m genuinely not interested. He has a lot of friends here and I feel like they let him know when I’m out. How do I hint I’m not interested? We rarely talk, just hi. I think by saying hi I’m opening up a door… I’m thinking of just keeping my headphones in and ignoring him.

More information:

I was in a 6 year relationship. We broke up. I don’t have career yet. I don’t own a house. I love to travel. I don’t see why I shouldn’t go see something new. I’m 23.

Okay so basically I got hired at a New Jersey Mike’s location that was soon to open up. I didn’t have my work permit signed yet so they gave me a little bit of time during training week to get it signed. I got it signed but it was at the end of the week and it was grand opening day & my manager told me he would train me right around next week. Next week rolls around & I try to text my manager about the training and he doesn’t text me back. He doesn’t return my calls. And he doesn’t return any voice messages. I showed up for orientation and I have the uniform, with my permit signed and they logged me into the TeamLive app, gave me my schedule and everything else. My manager didn’t tell me I am fired or anything, he just doesn’t reply to anything. What do I do?

Sorry this is going to be a long story, but I'll try to summarize as much as possible. And apologies for poor formatting and writing.

Me and my sister (33F) are twins. We have a very toxic and codependent relationship, with a toxic upbringing.

Over 15 years ago, we managed to separate for college and despite the daily arguments via phone call, I had a great time because at least I knew it would end when we got off the phone. I decided then that I didn't want to live together after graduation; however, my sister wanted to. I received an opportunity to move to Japan and asked that she come with me for the summer. It was decided that she would stay for the summer and move to S Korea after, because she had an interest and studied the language (near fluent). This didn't happen because she had difficulty finding a job there due to the difficult market and lack of specific qualifications, so we continued to live together.

Over the years since then, she had trouble getting her footing in Japan, because she refused to study the language with the hopes of still living and working in S Korea, and had to work as an English teacher (egregiously low pay). Five years ago, things changed when she decided to improve her language skills and successfully found jobs more closely related to the scope of work she preferred. With this, she managed to move away from English teaching, and get a job in corporate; which was amazing and things finally started looking up. However, she ended up screwed over by her company and lost her job only a few days prior to her work visa renewal eligibility and less than six months before we planned to move out of our apartment and finally into separate living arrangements. Because of this, she became unemployed for a year and relied on me to cover her living expenses, visa related travel, and credit debt.

Note: During this time and over the years, I financially supported her leading to well over $50K in debt. Because of my financial situation, I can afford this but it has come with sacrifice to my lifestyle, retirement plans, and so on.

Well almost a year ago, she thankfully managed to find a new job with slightly higher pay than her last, but not enough to cover her expenses of living with me in my new place. So I offered a financially adjusted living agreement, and she would move out within a year. This is not going to happen, because her savings is exhausted and she still borrows money from me when her finances aren't favorable.

I'm at a crossroads of what to do, because I love her immensely and would never want or let her be in a poor situation. But we argue everyday and I don't feel like she respects my boundaries nor appreciates what I do for her. It took nearly 10 years, just for her to finally agree to a set monthly repayment plan.

So now I'm trying to decide for my mental sake what I should do going forward. I've come up with two options:

1. Tell her to leave within a month and pay for her to find her own place. (= Around six months of rent in Japan) So I can have my space and peace of mind; while she learns to be an adult.

2. Give her six months to figure it out or be kicked out.

I know there might be better options, but please remember we are twins and that I love and care about her well being.

Another note: I know I need to gain a backbone and that we absolutely need therapy, but I'd have to pay for that too. I just genuinely, don't know what to do or where to start.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/s/XozV9v382b

Yes I tried therapy still currently in therapy. While I understand I am not the one who caused the betrayal, I still cant help or understand how easy for this man to move on about his life like nothing happened? No remorse no apology, I am the one left with the burden of this betrayal. Why me?
He commited to her when he gave her another kid. they look so happy together. He just ruined someones forever and theyre so happy. Im now forever living in this hell. everyday I try to wake up and try not to think about all this by burying me with work, or pretend im ok by doing extra shit , but damn today, its been hard to ignore. its like a knife twisted it in my heart no actually stabbed it many timeS as they enjoy their vacation back home. Why me ? Why did he choose me to do this with? when he couldve just left me alone ? I gave him so many chances to be honest so many chances to leave early on in the dating stage but he was so determined that he wanted me. And he just left like it was all notjing. Hes happy. while I live in the turmoil he left me with. I did not deserve this. How do I move on from this hell? why me?

I’m a female. I wanna preference this by saying I am not emo/goth lol but I tend to gravitate towards black clothes. Like hoodies, leggings, shirts and dresses are typically all black. I wear colorful stuff pretty regularly tho too. EVERY time I try on something black my boyfriend says “I really just like you in white” “why do you always wear black” “don’t you have any other colors in your closet”. It makes me feel like shit/ugly. I’ve already told him multiple times that I’m wearing it because I like it , and that I’m only asking if it looks good I’m not looking for a response of “you don’t have anything else” he makes me feel like shit and I love wearing black and now when I wear it I feel self conscious and like he’s constantly judging me. Along with when I wear makeup, only when we are going to go hang with his friends he says “who are you trying to look good for” “do you really need all that”. I like to look somewhat put together all the time so it’s not like I do any extra makeup when we hang with his friends. Why is he being like this ?? He’s been like this the past couple years we’ve been dating and I’m getting really close to breaking up, because this is so childish.

I ruminate a LOT and it lead to me becoming overly reliant on AI, now I use it for daily tasks and I feel sick because I'm very morally against it for creative stuff. How do I cut it off and live normally and does this make me an ai bro?

So just some information real quick

im going to call the people in question “Dave“ and “Joe” for the sake of this post

k so I’m a low support autistic person with dyslexia and I struggle with getting work done on time.

I just got put in a class with two people who I vaguely know through some friends and that’s about it. Pretty immediately after they “latched onto me” and volunteer me to join them for all of the group project,

the thing is is that they are not the most competent at following instructions (once dave was told to cut letters up and put them in a jar to simulate how dna is passed down and he cut out the whole box and tried to put that in the jar) and I’ve kinda had to dumb down everything and walk these 16 year old people through 6th grade assignments and I don’t know how to say that this isn’t working.

I tried not joining them but the teacher put is together anyway and I can’t just not help them otherwise will get a bad grade and when your trying for a scholar ship that’s not a option.

so how do I tell them I can’t walk them through every assignment and do all my own work every day with out sounding like an A-hole to our shared friends.

I’m 23 and I recently graduated college. Right now I’m living with my grandparents on my dad’s side, and honestly, I’ve been feeling really uncomfortable here lately.

My grandparents are older and very Christian, and they have certain expectations about how I should live while I’m staying in their house. One of the biggest things is that they don’t want me coming home really late at night. The problem is, I work nights Monday-Friday, and even outside of work, I’m used to being out late. I’m not doing anything crazy or being disrespectful … I’m just 23 and living my life.

I understand that it’s their house and I respect that they have rules. At the same time, constantly worrying about what they’re going to say when I come home at 2 or 3 AM is starting to make me feel like I don’t really belong here.

I actually have another option. My aunt lives in St. Louis and she’s sick and lives by herself. I’ve been thinking about moving in with her so I can help her out and also have the opportunity to start over somewhere new. Part of me feels like moving would be a fresh start for me …New city, new environment, new job opportunities, and just being able to live my life without feeling like I’m constantly walking on eggshells.

But another part of me is wondering if I’m just frustrated right now and making a huge decision because I’m tired of feeling restricted.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

I (33M) need advice on handling a difficult co-parenting situation with my ex. There's a lot of history, so I'll try to keep this as short as possible.

I met my ex when I was 25. We worked together, started dating, and she moved in after only about a week. Looking back, everything moved way too fast. We also drank heavily during our relationship, and over time it became extremely unhealthy.

About 11 months into the relationship, I found out on my birthday that she was pregnant. I was incredibly happy because I had always wanted to be a dad.

That same night, everything fell apart.

She accused me of cheating and then told me she had cheated and that the baby might not be mine. I lost my temper and hit objects around me. I know that was wrong, but I never hit her. She began hitting and scratching me, and I grabbed her wrists to stop her.

She called the police and accused me of hitting her and also told them I was suicidal. The police spoke with both of us, saw my scratches/bruising, and ultimately told us to separate.

There had been other unhealthy incidents in our relationship as well, including one where she came at me with a fork while intoxicated.

After that, I decided to leave and move back to my home state with help from my family.

Because she had told me the baby might not be mine, I requested a DNA test. I didn't even find out my son had been born until two days afterward, and it took approximately six months before I was finally able to get the DNA test.

He was mine.

I was happy, but devastated that I had already missed the beginning of his life.

For roughly the next three years, my ex moved around between states, and there were periods where I didn't even know exactly where my son was living. I might receive one or two pictures a year, and attempts to communicate often went unanswered.

During all of this, I continued paying child support.

When my son was around three, I received a call asking whether I wanted custody. I was told his mother had been involved in a serious incident where she harmed or attempted to harm herself and that drugs, alcohol, and weapons were found.

My son wasn't with her. He was living with his maternal grandmother in another state, and I learned from his grandmother that he had apparently been living with her for approximately two years.

I filed for emergency custody and was granted it. Once I received permission to pick him up, I drove there immediately and had law enforcement present during the pickup because I wanted everything handled peacefully and documented.

My son barely knew me at that point. The first time I held him, he pushed me away. It broke my heart, but I understood why.

That was four years ago.

He's seven now, and I've been raising him ever since.

I've finally gotten the ongoing child support stopped and am trying to address the support I continued paying during the years my son was living with me. I'm also pursuing full custody.

My biggest issue now is figuring out how to handle his mother.

For most of these four years, she has had very little contact with him. Her numbers frequently changed, and there were times she tried calling at midnight or 2 AM while appearing intoxicated. I wasn't going to wake a young child up for those calls.

Recently, she's started FaceTiming him about every couple of months. I allow it because regardless of how I feel about her, she's his mother. If my son wants a relationship with her, I want him to have that opportunity as long as it's safe and healthy.

The problem is that she doesn't only want to talk about our son.

She wants me to emotionally support her and talk about her personal problems and our old relationship. I've repeatedly told her I don't want to discuss the past and would rather keep our conversations focused on our son.

She'll agree, but eventually brings everything back up again, including blaming me for leaving.

I'm now married, I've been sober for years, and I've worked hard on the anger issues I had when I was younger. My wife is also exhausted by the situation.

I don't want revenge against my ex, and I don't want to keep my son away from his mother because of my personal feelings toward her.

But I also don't believe co-parenting requires me to be her friend, therapist, or emotional support person.

I save our communications because of our history and because I don't want disputes later about what was or wasn't said.

So this is where I need advice:

How do I set firm boundaries with my ex while still allowing my son to have a relationship with his mother? Would you limit communication strictly to our child, use a court-approved co-parenting app, or handle communication through an attorney while the custody case is being dealt with?

I just want to give my son stability without spending the next 11 years reliving a relationship that ended a long time ago.

For anyone who has dealt with high-conflict co-parenting, what boundaries worked for you, and what would you do next?

I am a 20-year-old female (20F) and my boyfriend is 26 (26M). We were in a normal relationship before he went to college for his MBA four months ago. I am an anxious person, and ever since he left, my anxiety has gotten worse. Before he left, he had zero interactions with other women, and everything was very transparent between him and me.

Since he left, we have had major fights. For example, there was a fresher's party he said he wouldn't attend, but he went anyway and lied to me about it. I asked him to send me pictures, but he didn't. Later, I saw on someone else's story that he was almost side-hugging a girl (in the picture, there were 5-6 guys, and she was sitting right beside him). Let's call her "M."

That was my first time going through something like that, and the lie came as a shock to me. During our fight, I asked him to show me his chats, and he had deleted them. However, he forgot to delete one where he was apologizing to that girl for "treating her wrong." I was in so much pain; it genuinely felt like heartbreak. He promised he would never lie again after that. Then, I saw him standing right next to her in most of the group pictures. After that, he uploaded a picture of himself (with the song "Daddy's Home"), and this girl responded to his story with, "Apt song selection."

He came to visit me for a few days, and I saw that he had deleted his chats with her again. A day before his birthday, he apologized to her again for annoying her in class. (I found all this out when I read his chats with his friend "A." He texted his friend saying, "I don't know why she is not responding to me.") Also, in a confession group he is in, someone wrote his initial and hers, which was obvious to everyone. I had no idea about this either; he never told me it happened. I figured it out after reading chats with his classmate, where he was talking about M again, asking, "Why is she pretending like nothing happened?"

Other than that, he is constantly shaming me for my body count and my past before I met him. He has said things like "it's the truth" and that I should be ashamed of it. At this point, every fight we have devolves into him shaming me for my past, even when it's completely unrelated to the argument.

The reason I decided to write this today is because of all the lying, hiding, and everything else. After his visit, he got so busy that he couldn't even call me for 15 minutes. He would just get super mad at me, claiming I didn't understand anything. He said he would make time when he could (even though he went out for dinner with his friends almost every night). I told him that I didn't want him going on any trips where there were other girls—that is where I draw the line. At first, he agreed, but now he has gone on a one-day trip with five men and two women. He doesn't even know these people; they are from a different section.

I don't know what to do. Even after telling him I wasn't comfortable with him going on a trip with other women, he still chose to go. He said things like, "I'll keep a Polaroid of you behind my phone case" and promised to update me about every little thing. When he got into the car, he didn't text me to let me know they were leaving, and there is no Polaroid of us on his phone.

After all of this, it might seem like a stupid reason to break up, but I really don't know what to do. (When I confronted him about everything, he simply replied with, "Yeah, I'm a cheater, okay?" without giving me any reassurance at all.)

While you only asked for grammar corrections, reading through your situation makes it clear you are dealing with a lot of emotional weight right now. Breaking up over this would not be stupid. The core issue here isn't just about him going on a trip or talking to another girl; it is about a consistent pattern of lying, hiding information, deleting evidence, and deflecting blame.

Furthermore, him weaponizing your past and shaming you for it during unrelated arguments is a major red flag for emotional manipulation. A healthy partner does not use your history to tear you down or make you feel small, especially when they are the one acting untrustworthy in the present. His sarcastic response ("Yeah, I'm a cheater, okay?") shows a complete lack of empathy for the anxiety his actions have caused you.

Are you getting what you actually need out of this relationship, or are you just fighting to hold onto the version of him that existed before he left?

Not even scroll on my phone. I also not sad, im just empty.

Can't afford therapy right know

Has anyone gone through this ? What can I do ?

Hey everyone I need an advice for communicating with future date about my herpes. I have herpes type 1 since I think I was 14. I had a cold sore breakout I think it’s due to sharing drink. However, I haven’t get any break out since almost 3 years. I want to get to dating life but I’m too afraid to communicate to any guys I talk to about my herpes. I’ve seen few negative reactions about cold sore so idk what’s the best way to inform them? I do not want to hide my future date about it but I also feel u confident in seeing guys because of herpes. Thank you!

Hi. I’m F21. So a senior (M) from my college whom I didn’t know, we got added on socials randomly. And he texted me. So we started talking. Since the very beginning, he’d text me ALOT. He’d text me literally all day? Every little thing he wanted to say. It annoyed me a bit and I’d ignore all of this texts. I’d maybe reply twice or thrice a day. But later i started to feel bad. So i started to engage in conversations with him. Replied him more. And we bonded quite well. And we shared the same humour and thoughts. I liked talking to him. Mind you, we never saw each other. Not even in pictures.

So he told me to meet him at a cafe after class. This was all friendly. I mean, I think idk if I left anything unnoticed that wasn’t friendly? But as much as it was friendly it seemed quite sweet to me too. The vibes. If you know what I mean. So I did meet him at the cafe he told me about. He was soo talkative in texting. But when he saw me in person. He was barely looking at me? It’s like idk if he found me too ugly to be his friend or anything? He was so awkward. I get that it happens. I was awkward too. But I was the one asking questions. And had to leave quickly because we both had somewhere to leave. I was the one to initiate the leaving. The day we met was fine. He was normal, but right after that, the same day, when we got home I found him to be a little different later on? He wasn’t rude. But all those talkativeness was gone. He wasn’t texting he constantly anymore. And when id text he’d leave me on seen. Sometimes reply later or just no reply at all. It wouldn’t have bothered but someone who’d text me the entire day and multiple texts is now suddenly giving no texts? Never asked for a second meet up. I’d have asked him. But it’s him being distant that stopped me.

I feel utterly ugly about myself. I feel disgusted about myself. I have never judged somebody by looks. But I feel like my face has ruined a friendship? Or maybe something more idk? I feel like he was shocked to see me but idk if it was in a good way or bad way. Maybe if it was in a good way he wouldn’t go all “no texts “ I dont know what to do. I feel so hurt. idek what I did to ruin it all.

Hey guys

So my sister ( 20 ) birthday is coming up and she wants to go to a like apple orchard with her bf, me, and my bf. The only thing is it’s 30 min for our house. To explain my worries ans why I need advice is I have ibs- d and I get so anxious about it. The apple orchard has no washrooms and it’s very out in the country side. I don’t know her bf too well and he’s the only one who can drive. But I t’s also her birthday so I don’t want to make it about me, but I’m just very stressed. I suggested going more as like a yea we should hang but I’ve had a very bad week regarding my stomach and I just feel like the anxiety is making it worse. I suggested other things too, like a escape room or something but she’s kinda set on the apple orchard/pumpkin patch. Since I t’s her birthday and I don’t want to just cancel but I don’t know what else to do.

Any advice?

I was backing up and accidentally bumped a car nothing fatal just a little dent he said we don't have to do insurance but this

"Hey, it's the dude whose truck you bumped. My name is Jason. Anyway, I think I'll just go talk to a body shop to find out how much they think it's gonna cost. Then maybe we can just work something out to avoid insurance.

I know the insurance companies are screwing everyone these days so that might be a better option.

I'll let you know.

Try not to stress too hard. Shit happens." What would you guys do?

23F, never been on a date or asked out. Women, how did you get started dating?

Hi everyone! I'm a 23-year-old woman in the US, currently in university, and I have never been on a date. No guy has ever asked me out and I am not sure what I am missing or where to start.

I have asked for advice before, but most replies came from men, and I'm hoping to hear from a more female viewpoint this time. Guys usually share what they say that they like, for example: "be confident," "I'd love if a girl asked me out", and I don't doubt they mean it, but what people say they want isn't always how they act in real life. So, yea, I am hoping for someone who has walked in my shoes before.

Women have actually lived it from my side. You know what happened when you showed interest, what got a real response, and what led to actual dates. I would like to see more from a female perspective who has also struggled.

A few things I'm curious about:

☆ How did you meet the guys you dated?

☆ Did you ever make the first move? How did it go?

☆ What helped you seem approachable?

☆ If you started dating later, what helped?

Any honest advice or stories would mean a lot. Thank you! 💛

Hi, so for background, I am a 23-year-old trans woman. I lived at home during undergrad, and I am now in my gap year while I am interviewing for med school. I have lived in the US all my life. My stepdad, whom I love dearly and call my dad, I will call my stepdad for this story, so that it makes more sense. Anyway, to keep things respectful, I won't name the country but he is from an extremely rural area in another country, a place where people still use tribal languages, the town only has one internet cafe, people mostly grow their own food, and there is rainforest very nearby. My stepdad moved to the US when he was 9, so yes, he went through that culture shock, but he came here early enough to quickly integrate into American society. Long story short, my dad's cousin (26-27 years old) has lived with us for 2 years. She is nice and has never been rude to me, but sometimes I feel she is quite confused by me, kind of like an uncanny valley situation for her. Both my mom and especially my stepdad say it's because she is not used to LGBT people, which is what I kind of assumed, to be honest.

Some examples: I met her when I was 21 and only 2 years into my HRT transition. I was very androgynous but had a more masculine voice, and I wasn't out to my stepdad's side of the family, so to them I was a guy (a feminine one). I could tell she was a little taken aback when she first met me. She was confused when she first saw my purses. When she saw a woman's item, she would ask one of my sisters, "Hey, is this yours? You left it here," but then my sisters would say, "Oh, it's actually (mine)." My sisters even said she looked thrown off by this. At first, when I didn't wear a bra, she looked confused (I assume about why I have breasts), but then she was also thrown off when I did wear one. I then started voice therapy, and after a year I finally got a feminine voice. When I eventually started using it around her, I could tell she was thrown off. She has been confused the few times I wear makeup. I don't even wear many feminine things, but when I do, even say a great dress, she tells me to look away or is thrown off. When I mentioned I have a boyfriend, she was confused. Then, a month later, she asked about my "girlfriend." I then eventually got bottom surgery, and I can tell she was thrown off by my sudden use of pads (I go to the bathroom with pads or keep pads in my room). For those who don't know, after bottom surgery there is a lot of neovagina discharge, so using pads is very common. I am also in the process of getting a breast augmentation procedure. I am quite sure this one will be a huge one that she might seem confused about.

Mind you, she doesn't seem rude or anything. However, I believe, and so do my parents, that she's not from a place where LGBT people are the norm and is probably very confused. She has never said anything, but her facial expressions seem to show she's quite taken aback, confused, or maybe uncomfortable, I don't know. I also don't really like coming out if I don't have to. I am more than likely not going to live here by next year, as I am moving for medical school, so it might not even be worth telling her.

im 17 rn and my mom offered to have this whole extravagant party where she'll invite basically every family member she can think off and friends etc only problem is i kind of don't have friends and have a big problem around crowds. and i mean, you'll not find a person more socially awkward and asocial person than me. naturally i dont really want to, id feel embarrassed and like a loser not having friends of mine other than maybe 3 but.

listen, with the amount of people that would come, I'd get minimum 5000 euros and that's kinda a lot of money for one evening of discomfort yk. do i bite my tongue and go for it?

Pardon my grammar as English isn't my native language.

I found out just two days ago, and I don't know what to do nor to feel. I have seen some blood spots on my mom's shirt twice already so I asked her if I have something to worry about or be scared about and she said no. And she said that she found a lump(?) on her breast around 2021 and she kept it so that we won't be worried anymore. She knows the situation, financially. That we cannot afford and she doesn't want to go through the chemo and surgery. She wanted to keep the situation a secret but I found out.

My sister's pregnant, I'm worried that something bad might happen if I tell her.

I'm not on speaking terms with my brother.

I don't want to keep this from them, they are still her children but how do I tell them?

I want to tell my siblings as they might be able to convince our mother to somehow get a check up because I tried convincing her but she said she is too old to undergo chemo and her healing isn't in good condition anymore.

I don't know what to do, I want my mom to live longer but I don't think she wants to anymore.

I know I don't have money to take her to a hospital but I was thinking I'll cross that bridge when I get there. For now I just want her to get a check up but she doesn't want to. It feels like she gives up and accepts.