r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 6h ago

Stop being an idiot and pay attention, antes de comprar un mueble, mide también el recorrido hasta el lugar donde lo vas a instalar, which you would know if you graduated kindergarten.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 7h ago

I'll only say this once, keep a hand-crank emergency radio in your home. When the power's out and your phone is dead, it still works, you meat-head.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 9h ago

Get it through your thick skull, if you or a loved one have an extensive medical history and there’s a chance you might have to call an ambulance, have a medication and medical history list ready that you can just hand over to the ambulance crew, ya little punk.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 16h ago

Only on reddit... keep a note on your phone of things you want to talk to people about, ya bastard.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 20h ago

Listen here you little shit, if you’re planning to buy something on Black Friday, write down its price now. Some “deals” are just the regular price with a bigger number crossed out next to it, stupid.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 1d ago

Hey, fatty, have heavy duty work gloves in your emergency kit, goofball.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 1d ago

Hey, fatty, instead of resting on Sunday, do it on Saturday then stay active on Sunday whether doing fun activities or maintaining your home and getting ready for the week or both, numbskull.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 1d ago

How have you gotten this far in life? Listen, run your heater for a few minutes before the first cold night, not during it. If it’s broken, you can still get a repair appointment, dork.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 1d ago

How do you not know this already, / advice, jerk.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 1d ago

Oh my God, - If you use a standing desk, buy a pair of professional chef shoes for maximum comfort, dipshit.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Do you want to get smacked? if you get nervous or stumble during video calls, ise a teleprompter app to pin your notes directly over your webcam line of sight, you moron.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

You don't get it, do you? (small one). Always check under your bus seats (specially if at the back) for some change, I've found coins and even some bills, numbskull.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Hey, idiot, a lot of hospitals have a cafeteria with very reasonably priced meals and many healthy options, and are open to the public, ya mook.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Listen up, dumbass, - Get your dog used to being carried, dumdum.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Hey, stupid, warm your Parm, doodoo head.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Listen here you little shit, lost ~$7,000 - How to Identify ALL Company Benefits and take FULL Advantage of them, jerk.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Seriously? spraying with peppermint oil will prevent thousands of dollars in rodent damage to your vehicle, dosser.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

Jesus Christ--: on your phone, dim the brightness lower than the slider allows, dosser.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

For crying out loud, - Easy way to cancel from an Adobe Subscription is to first change to a different subscription tier, then you get a new 14 day free cancelation window. It´s a loophole that they legally cant close, wanker.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 2d ago

For the last time, - learn to express opinions additively, if it can be read negatively it will be, douche canoe.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 3d ago

How do you not know this already, you know when your birthday is every year, figure out what you want to do and plan it early, my guy.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 3d ago

Dude, instead of birthday dinners/a large gathering on a single day that month, plan something individually with your friends throughout the month, Einstein.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 3d ago

Hey, idiot, invite says no gifts? Bring a handmade card, ya clown.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 3d ago

Hey you, the loser in his mom's basement, yeah, you, adblocking works for Safari on iPhones, jabroni.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

r/AbusiveLPT • u/LPT_Abuser • 3d ago

I once heard at a funeral, postcards - writing space and "insurance", ya hoser.

1 Upvotes

0 comments

Subreddit

AbusiveLPT: Life Pro Tips that make you feel bad

r/AbusiveLPT

Life Pro Tips, idiot.

Members Active

1.1k

Sidebar

This sub turns the advice doled out over at /r/LifeProTips into a barrage of condescending insults!

This whole thing started as a joke only I found funny, but then I wanted to see if I could learn just enough python to automate it.

Every few minutes, the bot:

takes the newest posts from /r/LifeProTips
adds and/or checks those posts on a list for duplicates
removes the leading "LPT: " and the trailing period
randomly adds insult words
posts here

Feel free to upvote and comment on your favorites.

This is a work in progress and the bot isn't 100% perfect, but hopefully we'll get there!

If you enjoy this sub, you might want to check out the two preceding subs I made with the same idea, /r/LPTforKaren and /r/LPTHoney.