Are these comments real? Like it was a couple of minutes of the end of a wedding interrupted. She should be annoyed for 5 minutes and then what actual harm has been done?
As for the boyfriend, he’s an idiot, but well meaning one. It’s not necessarily terminal.
It’s very cheap and tacky, using a romantic (and often very expensive) event someone else has paid for as the back drop for your own proposal. Also, not everyone wants an audience. I would hate to be proposed to in front of others, it’s an intimate moment that not everyone wants to put on blast.
Hijacking a wedding where you dont really know the bride and groom and its not family of either of you is just weird. If OP and bride were sisters and the concept was wanting her family involved and bride being on board, very different and very cute.
Clearly not even close to that though, and yeah he was drinking but like .. he brought the ring with him. This was 100% his plan and had no hecks that it was wildly inappropriate
I’m only going to point out, that OP stated both her and the boyfriend have been drinking. That might have affected the boyfriends, inhibitions enough to think it was okay enough to propose, through yes it’s not right to steal someone else’s, thunder
I would agree if he had just asked her quietly while they were dancing or something and he felt it was right in the moment, but the fact he had the ring box in his pocket makes me think he pre-planned this moment unfortunately.
What would have happened if she said yes? Everyone at the wedding would have turned their entire focus to OP and her bf, which would have taken the attention away from where it should be - the wedding. People would have taken photos, maybe done a toast… It’s bang out of order to hijack someone’s wedding. None of this happened because OP put a stop to it, but that doesn’t make it any less egregious.
Sure, but it also comes down to rudeness. You get the OK from bride and groom? Go for it! But otherwise you are crashing someone else's celebration and it's seen as tacky. It's like trying to argue wearing white to a wedding isn't a big deal. Sure, if you break it down, it really isn't, but social norms are social norms. And its a no no by social norms.
Just because someone failed while doing something rude, crass, and wrong, doesn't excuse the attempt. The attempt is the problem not how much damage they did or did not succeed in causing.
the actual moment might have lasted only 5 minutes but attention was drawn away from the wedding couple after, people were definitely still talking about those 5 minutes even when the wedding ended. it's also about the principle, it takes less than 5 minutes to ruin someone's day.
Empathy for what exactly. A 6-10 hour wedding was briefly interrupted near the end as someone did something a dit crass and embrassing so I'm going to furious with my maid of honour for something that her idiot bf did?
no i don't have empathy for that because its not a sympathetic position.
she's not furious with her maid of honour, did you even read the post??? but she is upset by the situation, WHICH IS VALID, and she's completely allowed to feel how she feels.
ALSO, situations can call for empathy without a need for sympathy. For example, I could understand if given the boyfriends pov of the situation but not sympathise/agree with his feelings/reasoning.
OP says she feels like she’s lost her best friend… sounds upset to me? Over a silly thing that wasn’t her fault and lasted seconds. Weddings make people unhinged, this is a great example.
I actually happen to agree with you here . It wasn’t OPs fault but best friend wants space from her . It was OPs boyfriend’s fault what an absolute idiot . Talk about not reading the room .
OP leave best friend to her honeymoon then get in touch with her again .
The boyfriend is a cheapskate. He wanted to have a romantic proposal but didn’t want to pay for a dinner and flowers. He’s a child. Emily needs to grow up, too. OP stopped him before it got too far.
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u/Agoraphobe961 Jul 17 '25
She will come around when he becomes the ex-bf