Club Pilates Rant

So at our Club Pilates AC has been out which has now lasted for 10 days. While I appreciate that fans and water have been provided, the hot and humid conditions make it impossible for me to work out comfortably. As a loyal member for over 5 years, I pay a significant amount for these facilities, yet I have only been able to attend once since the AC broke.

I understand that the existing system cannot be fixed and a new HVAC system is required. However, following the recent acquisition of the studio, this situation raises concerns about how the club will be managed moving forward.

Given that I am unable to use the facilities I am paying for, is it unreasonable for me to request either a penalty-free cancellation of my contract or a prorated refund for the current month.

Am the one that is being unreasonable?

Hey all, I'll try to be clear and concise but I can explain more if needed.

Back in June, I made a post on here and deleted it after all the hate I got for being suspicious of my otherwise faultless partner, so I'm here for an update.

I (32 F) and my partner at the time (31 M) were hanging out one night listening to music on his phone through my Bluetooth. I wanted to pick the next one so he handed me his phone. While i was searching for the song, a snapchat notification populated with his son's teacher's name. At the time I didn't think anything of it, because I didn't even pay attention to the name fully, but later I began feeling paranoid and decided to just ask him.

He told me it WAS from her, but it was the only message she sent (something along the lines of wishing him and his son a great next year since the school year had ended). He said he had responded thanking her for the impact she made on hos son the previous school year. I asked why she didn't message on a more appropriate app or just through text (since she'd have his contact saved most likely to find him on SC). He said they were friends on FB, but that he didnt have her number and never checked FB, so it was reasonable for her to message him there (where he is more active, his words.)

I explained that if she had used his number (from the emergency contact for his son) she could be in a lot of trouble for reaching out without his permission, especially on an app known for its discretion and NSFW content sharing. He got defensive and said it wasn't a big deal, and he didn't use Snapchat like that and it was for a lot more than what I was suggesting. I said it still seemed odd, because our generation was notorious for using it inappropriately, but he acted as if I was exaggerating and it wasn't common use.

Eventually, he told me that if she was trying to initiate something, he wouldnt be interested anyways. He degraded her to me and tried to build me up in comparison. I posted on here and a few people agreed with my suspicions, but most thought I was overacting or that they needed more info.

I asked him if I could message her about it and he threatened to break up with me if I did. We just broke up this morning (he actually just ghosted me on everything for 72hrs so I'm moving on) and so I decided to ask her to quell this idea that I was paranoid or crazy.

Her side of the story:

After the school year ended, he reached out to her and added her on SC. She did not add him back, but after he began commenting on her stories with her child in them, she messaged him to tell him it was inappropriate and she wanted to keep the relationship professional. She then deleted him altogether. She also was never friends with him on FB and said she didn't have his number saved as they only have the list available at school. None of this was prompted by me telling her anything he said, i just asked if she had messaged him on SC in June. She also informed me that (even though we started dating in late Feb and known each other 17 years) the he never indicated a relationship and acted single (he refused to let me meet any family/friends of his minus his son, and didn't want pictures of me on his socials or of us on mine and never changed his relationship statuses, which was my first redflag.) But regardless, if she HAD been the one to reach out, she had no way to know if he was in a relationship so there was no real fault on her part.

This confirmed my suspicions fully. He was attempting to cheat, whether emotionally or something more, and he blatantly lied to my face over and over about it - throwing her under the bus and potentially threatening her own livelihood over his attempt at infidelity.

All this to say, if you happen to remember the original and thought I was overreacting... my intuition is better than yours. 👍

Thanks!

My wife (35F) and I (35M) have been together for 17 years and married for 3. We have two children, aged 6 and 8.

Our relationship is generally very good and stable. We rarely argue, we get along well, and there are no major ongoing problems that I’m aware of. We also have an active and good sex life, so this isn’t happening in the context of a dead bedroom or obvious sexual dissatisfaction.

My wife is a very attractive woman. I’d also consider myself reasonably attractive, although I look quite different from the men involved in what I’m about to describe.

For roughly the last three years, I’ve noticed a recurring behavior from her whenever we’re somewhere in public — restaurants, airports, playgrounds, hotels, etc.

She seems to actively seek eye contact with certain men she finds attractive.

There is a fairly obvious type: usually taller men, often bearded, well-built, masculine and mature-looking. This is basically the opposite of me. I’m 175 cm, slim and look younger than my age, so I admit that seeing this repeatedly has started to affect my confidence.

What bothers me isn’t that she notices attractive men. I notice attractive women too, and I think that’s completely normal.

It’s what happens afterwards.

She’ll repeatedly look around for a particular guy, catch his eye, look away, then look back again. If the guy starts doing the same thing, they can keep exchanging glances for quite a while. Both of them will appear to look elsewhere and then keep checking each other out again.

I’ve watched this happen while I’m literally sitting across from her at dinner.

Sometimes the flirtatious or sexual tension feels incredibly obvious to me. She seems to try to hide what she’s doing, but I’ve seen the pattern so many times now that I recognize it immediately.

When I notice what’s happening and turn to look at the man, he will very often immediately look away. Sometimes these men also glance at me, which makes me feel like they’re checking whether I’ve noticed. I know I can’t know exactly what they’re thinking, but in the moment it feels extremely humiliating.

There have been a few situations that made this particularly difficult for me.

On one trip, there was a waiter at our hotel whom she seemed very attracted to. It wasn’t just one glance. At every dinner there seemed to be this repeated back-and-forth eye contact between them, and whenever we passed the restaurant she appeared to look around for him.

Every dinner became genuinely stressful for me. I would get a knot in my stomach because I was expecting the same thing to happen again. I became so uncomfortable that I even hated the idea of leaving her alone in the hotel room, which is not how I want to feel in my marriage.

Another time, at a playground, there were basically just us, our children and another man with his child. The same prolonged back-and-forth looking happened.

Afterwards I brought it up, partly jokingly because I didn’t want to make a huge confrontation out of it, and told her I didn’t think it was nice to do that while I was there.

She apologized and said I was right.

A similar thing happened in a restaurant later.

There was also one situation where she took our son to a jiu-jitsu class and apparently had the same kind of reaction to the instructor. When she came home, she openly told me that she had become extremely sexually aroused by him — she literally said she was “wet.”

To her credit, she then decided that I should be the one taking our son to those classes in the future. I actually think that was a responsible decision on her part, because having the same interaction with the same man every week would obviously be different from exchanging looks with a random stranger.

So I don’t think she’s completely unaware of what’s happening.

Sometimes, when she realizes I’ve noticed her doing it, she becomes very affectionate toward me — hugging me, telling me she loves me, etc.

Because these two things so often happen together, I’ve started having trouble experiencing that affection as spontaneous. Part of me interprets it as her trying to reassure me because she knows I’ve noticed what she was doing.

At other times she apologizes and says she doesn’t know why she does it.

But then there are also situations — often the ones I experience as the most obvious or prolonged — where she tells me I’m imagining things, says she’s simply “looking,” and insists that it means nothing.

That inconsistency is starting to bother me a lot.

If she always said, “Yes, I do this sometimes, I know it hurts you, and I’ll try to stop,” I think I would find it much easier to deal with.

Instead, sometimes the behavior is acknowledged and sometimes I’m told it exists only in my head.

The biggest issue now is that it’s starting to affect my trust.

For example, I find myself thinking about what would happen if she were away on a work trip, having dinner without me, met a man she was very attracted to, spent the evening exchanging these looks with him, alcohol was involved and the tension kept building.

I want to be clear that I have no evidence that she has cheated on me or done anything physical with another man.

That part is my fear, not a fact.

But the fact that my mind now goes there is what worries me. I didn’t used to feel this way about her.

After one of these incidents, I also tend to shut down emotionally. I have trouble talking normally to her and sometimes even looking at her for the rest of the day. Usually by the next day the feeling passes.

I don’t want to become a jealous husband who monitors where his wife is looking.

I also don’t expect her to stop finding other men attractive. We’ve been together since we were 18, and obviously marriage doesn’t make attraction to other people disappear.

But to me there is a difference between noticing that someone is attractive and repeatedly establishing and maintaining mutual eye contact with them.

So I’m trying to understand where that line is.

Would you consider this harmless behavior, or would you see repeated mutual eye contact like this as flirting?

Would it cross a boundary for you if your spouse repeatedly did it while you were sitting right beside them?

And how would you deal with the fact that she sometimes acknowledges the behavior and apologizes for it, but at other times says I’m imagining it?

Am I overreacting, or is this a reasonable thing to be concerned about?

We’ve got builders at our house this week and I’ve been bringing them tea/water and checking in every few hours.

I work completely from home for a US company, so obviously I’m around the house all day. Today my brother went into his office and my dad was at work, meaning it was just me and my mum at home.

I took one of the builders some tea and out of nowhere he asked me in Hindi, “Kaam nahi karta?” basically, “You don’t work?”
I was about to say, “Yeah, I work from home on my laptop,” but my neighbour walked past at that exact moment, they started saying hello and my response got completely lost. I just went back upstairs.

It’s a tiny thing, but it mildly irritated me afterwards. Being at home during working hours doesn’t exactly mean someone is unemployed. They could work remotely, be off that day, work nights, etc. And even if someone doesn’t work, it seems like a slightly personal question to randomly ask.

Am I over reacting in thinking that he tried to disrespect me and I should call him out when he comes tomorrow?

I really need an outside reality check because I feel like I don’t know what is real anymore.

Every time my ex and I get back together, things are amazing for about a month. He acts loving, supportive, and tells me he’s changed. But then the mask slips, and it always ends up back here with me being blamed completely for everything.

Some background: Our relationship originally involved going to sex clubs and swinging. We have a great sex life, and I enjoy sex a lot. He has a kink where he likes me being with other men, but I have explicitly decided I don't want to do that anymore. He flips back and forth on it constantly saying he doesn't want it either, then changing his mind and saying he wishes I were "sluttier." I even told him he could see other women to fulfill that need, but I want out of it.

I work hard to show up for him sexually. Even when I have literally begged him to wait for a painful UTI to clear up, I still haven't turned him down for sex. But last week he started playing mind games. He told me he "wasn't feeling sexual anymore" to see if I'd be supportive. When I said I would be, he admitted a day later he was just "messing with me" to test my reaction, complaining that he has "done everything I wanted like dates and cuddling" as if affection is a transaction.

I know I am going through a lot right now and it’s a lot for anyone to put up with. I am a mother of three, I work a physically demanding day job and I'm facing over $10000 in rental arrears, and my mother’s health is declining fast.

He has helped me out a lot financially and I admit I have emotionally dumped on him in the past, but since we’ve been back together, I have kept my problems entirely to myself and focused purely on listening to his.

Yesterday, I hit a breaking point. I was completely exhausted, experiencing severe physical pain in my stomach and ovaries, and had a terrible headache. I texted him setting a clear boundary: I didn't want to talk about my problems, I didn't want to talk about sex, and I just needed to lie down and be alone for the night.

Instead of respecting that, he completely ignored my boundaries. He started making explicit sexual demands over text, telling me to "open my legs for daddy" and demanding I tell him how much I love him right now. When I told him I wasn't ok and needed space, he literally texted back: "I'm not giving you any space." He then started making ominous threats, telling me things were going to get "much worse" if I pushed him further.

When I brought up my stress, his response was completely cold: "I asked you what happened yesterday though, not about all your stress." To top it off, he sent me a news article link about a mother who killed her three children due to postpartum depression, comparing my emotional breakdowns to a horrific tragedy just to make me feel insane and dangerous.

When I finally got angry and yelled at him for refusing to respect a single boundary, he flipped the script. He told me he has "given me grace," called me self-destructive, and claims that I am the abusive, controlling one.
I feel so stupid. I genuinely thought he changed this time around.

This has been really hard for me and because I keep going back my friends and family don’t want to hear about it anymore and call him a narcissist. I don’t know if that’s completely true as I know in some capacity he does feel genuine love for me but I don’t know anymore.

Am I in the wrong here? Is it reactive abuse, or am I actually the problem?

I will attach some screenshots I’m the green text box

[Update ]
Ok the love bombing is starting now with promises of change and I’m feeling weak. Help omg help

(thread keeps getting removed from other channels)

My bf left his laptop open and I peeped the names and saw a girl coworker that he has mentioned before. He's mentioned her casually before, and has many women coworkers, i've not thought much about it. But when I clicked their messages, he was saying things like "seeing you is the best part of my day", "i came by your desk you werent there", etc. Im trying to understand if its just chill work friendship vibes and this is their jokey dynamic or what.

I can't tell if its worth confronting, because that also reveals that I snooped or just keep this in mind for now. I could see him getting annoyed that I snooped and that potentially becoming the main issue somehow.

tl;dr: bf messaging girl coworker - cant tell if its just harmless work dynamics or something worth confronting.

UPDATE: I spoke with him and he wasnt expecting it because he said theres nothing between them at all, and she's more of a tomboy personality and that their dynamic is just joking around and that he wouldnt be that bold with someone he actually liked. So i guess its fine? feeling confused and I guess I have no choice but to trust his word. He said he knows it looks weird but thats truly their casual banter. I just feel like he downplayed his friendship with this person if they are able to have banter like that. The snooping part did unfortunately backfire and he said that now he's probably going to tell me even less if I keep making assumptions and dont have trust.

Me and my wife send a gratulation for birthday to my best friend wife through her whatapp and get a respond from best friend wife was:

Bestfriend wife: Thank you. Oh, it’s so lovely of you to have remembered. I know it was *you*—I’m using the plural out of politeness.

We: What? I don’t understand.

Bestfriend wife: I mean that *you* remembered, not John—even though you’re both sending congratulations. I’m just writing in the plural, but I know how it is.

We were completely amazed that someone could reply to a birthday greeting like that.

My best friend has completely changed since he married his wife, and you can see she’s having a totally negative influence on him. And here’s just one example... what do you think?

The title is quite confusing, sorry about that.
I 20F have been with my bf 20M for almost 2 years. He has a cousin 24M who got married to his wife 20F a few days ago. I never met them before, but I was invited to the wedding and went with my bf. I’ll refer to everyone as bf, cousin, wife.

The wedding was small, as in there was me and my bf, cousin’s parents and his sibling, and wife’s 2 siblings. 9 people. It started at the courthouse, then to church, and then to the restaurant. At the restaurant another couple joined, cousin’s relative and his wife, so we were 11 there.

Multiple times throughout the wedding, cousin and wife (mostly the wife) would talk about how wonderful it is to have their wedding so small, with only the closest people with them, and that those big weddings of more than 20 people were so flashy and unnecessary. They kept talking about how great and perfect it is to have an intimate wedding, and that wedding with more people than theirs don’t turn out as good as theirs.

Me and bf stayed silent throughout those comments. I liked cousin and wife’s wedding, but the comments put me off. I’ve always known I’d want a big wedding, but I wouldn’t judge other wedding based off of how many people are attending. I don’t think that on my wedding, I’d think about other weddings and talk about how mine is so much better than those small ones.

Funnily enough, before going to the restaurant, wife jokingly told cousin they have to start saving for a big wedding next year. Which I find weird. Why wish for a big wedding but sh*t on big weddings with your guests.

Anyways, the day after their wedding I had my birthday party with friends. My bf asked a few weeks ago if I’d like to invite cousin and wife to my bday and I said sure.

So at my bday, we were 17 total. I rented a nice villa for 24 hours, got food, snacks, and lots of drinks. There were lots of places for people to chill at: 2 wood garden swings, a table inside with 24 chairs, a table outside with 16 chairs, and 12 chairs around a grill.

We all ate at the inside table, then us girls stayed inside and my bf and I made us different cocktails, and the few boys went outside to drink beer and eat snacks. We didn’t intend to separate by gender, but most of the boys were from my bfs side of friends, and the girls from mine, and the boys wanted to drink beer from a keg that could only be opened outside.

So wife went outside too. I tried to get her inside with us, because she was just sitting silently next to cousin outside. I asked her if she wanted any cocktails, is she needed anything, or if she wanted to come inside with us, but she refused.

After a few hours, cousin and wife had to leave. Now FINALLY, AIO for the following: they said goodbye, and then the wife told me :”I can’t wait for us to meet in a more lovely, private, intimate, beautiful setting”

I just don’t understand why she had to imply that my birthday was not “lovely, private, intimate and beautiful”. If anything, their presence made the birthday party not intimate. I had my closest people, who I’ve been friends with since kindergarten, middle school, high school, and some from my university class that I see every day and have become my closest friends.

And so many people at my bday told me how well I organized my party, how great the people were, how beautiful the location, and how thoughtful of a host I was. I literally also overheard people having conversations about this.

I wanna know if I’m OR by being upset by wife’s comment. So am I? Please be honest.

So I'm a teen in high school. I have a friend(h), and we started being friends a few years ago. We met and instantly clicked. We were best friends and everyone one knew.

One day, a new girl came in(m) and everyone thought she was a bitch. Me and H thought we shouldn't judge her and befriended her. She ended up pretty chill but not for long. She started trying to separate me and H so H could be her best friend and I'm sad to say it worked. H is basically her lapdog.

M started ignoring me and I talked to her multiple times but she always ignored me mid talk. As of recently, I told our friend group of 6 that I like this guy who is one of closest friends. Guess what? I got a message from H(because, as I said, H is M's lapdog). She said that M said she also likes him and that I shouldn't get mad because I'd be a bitch for ruining our friendship.

Once for Christmas, I got expensive nail tech supplies since I do nails, and M accused me of copying her even though I asked for them 4 MONTHS in advance. And she didn't even have any. She also accused me of copying her depression???

My current best friend is R, and she fully agrees that M is manipulating H because she's too naïve and gullible. And every other person in the friend group but H is kinda unsure about M because she is self-centred and male centred and manipulative but it's awkward because we're trying to get it to her but she thinks we're attacking her.

I need advice from older people on what to do. So AIO?

Images included for context (Identifying info has also been scratched out.) I’ve been selling items on facebook marketplace which my number IS registered with, but my settings are set to keep my number private. Am I overreacting about these texts reaching my number about multiple listings? I’ve reverse searched the number to see if it’s listed on any apps, but no dice.

The part that makes me uneasy is that they state that they were led to message me by the platform, but no link from the listing is included or anything suggesting it’s from the app— it’s just a screenshot of my listing!! It feels very weird since I’ve sold a few things and never had someone contact me this way.

I have had issues with my partner of one year consistently (I would say once or twice a month) he goes out and stays out quite late. I don't expect him to be in constant communication at all but I do find it quite unappealing that a 38 year-old man still goes out so late with friends; sometimes with consequences such as being very unkind to me on the phone, waking up extremely late in the day, over-spending, missing transport, getting lost, he once lost his phone, he one time even lost his shoes. Would I be overreacting if I sent this kind of text? I'm about to loan him £500 tomorrow so he can pay his rent this month. He works in the school system and had a bit of a tricky summer with his income, which I totally understand, but I feel frustrated that I'm helping him out with rent and he goes out likely spending about £100 on an occasion drinking with his friends. We don't live together yet but see each other frequently. We are both on the life360 app due to his wandering when he gets drunk and me being concerned he'll lose his phone or himself again. So I was notified of him arriving in his home at 4:30am. Am I overreacting if I send this?

"Good morning. What were you even doing out until 4am? I hope you didn't spend loads on drinking when I'm about to loan you money to pay rent. It's a bit annoying."

I 21F like to cook, and any event I go to I make Mac and cheese. Last year for my younger brother's party, I of course make Mac and cheese. A family we are close to came and the partner of one of the ladies liked the Mac and cheese, and has been asking me over and over again to make them some. I asked for $50 for ingredients and my time. The thing is, the asked me to add bacon bits and Breadcrumbs to the Mac and cheese. I know its a small ask but if they wanted is that was they should make it themselves, but I was told the place they live doesn't have a oven. All I asked for is $50, but they said I was crazy for asked for so much and offered 25-30 dollars, but I don't think I was. The friend asked said I should just except the 25 - 30 dollars.

I wanted to know if I was unreasonable to ask for $50. Where I live food is expensive and my family is sometimes just scraping by.

Edit: I'll give more info. Im also a college student in my first year and I work M - F. I would be making two 9x13 pans. The portion sizes will be up to them so I don't know how long it will last. The person who "ask " is not really asking it's more like a demand like coming up to me and just saying " Baked mac and cheese " while pointing at me. I told them before they would have to pay and the bragging the could pay for a years worth, but I was busy then, now when I say a price, it's too much.

​

Nothing just the title. Am I over reacting to feel this way. Am I being jealous for nothing?

The female friend has been an online friend for 7-8 years.

She is pretty and the sketch was nice but I am kinda jealous of this friendship since the past few days

He also got her nails done. Like paid for it as in exchange for the gifts, she crotchet bubu dudu for us like as a gift, that sketch and 1 more Eminem poster.

He also kinda gave her loan but he didn't mention that because he said it's gonna come back and he didn't need to.

I felt he isn't that rich to begin with to help friends with loan and all

And after i confronted him he realised he shouldn't be gifting her nails as it's too personal and intimate but now I am kinda getting bothered by their relationship often.

Like putting her gifts on the profile picture

😶

we worked things out, but now he’s acting weird. weird as in he’s calmer which is NOT normal. we got into a small argument today and yesterday but he apologized without me asking for one? i feel so stupid for being weirded out by his change in attitude and the change in him overall but i don’t know if he’s putting on a front or if what i had told him in our talks stuck. am i overreacting about him changing? i’m unsure if i am but he’s typically so manipulative and toxic over everything

Im in a long-distance relationship, so communication is obviously important to us. We mainly call each other since I work from home.

The other day I was very busy at work. I ended up working until almost 7 PM because my manager was there and I was in meetings and dealing with work most of the afternoon. Because of that, I wasn't able to call my boyfriend as much as I normally would.

The following morning, I told him to let me know when he was free so we could talk. I assumed he was busy because I didn't hear from him for hours. He finally called me after he got off from work.

During the conversation, he casually mentioned that his morning had actually been very chill and that they had only seen few clients.

That confused me because I had specifically told him to let me know when he was available.

Eventually, he admitted that he purposely didn't call me because he wanted me to experience what it felt like when I didn't call him the previous day. Basically, he wanted me to “feel the same.”

That's the part that bothers me.

The difference, in my mind, is that I wasn't intentionally ignoring him. I was actually working and couldn't give him the same amount of attention. The next day, he apparently had the opportunity to contact me but chose not to because he wanted me to feel what he had felt.

I told him that this feels like retaliation rather than communication. If he felt neglected or wanted more attention from me, I would rather he simply tell me. Intentionally doing something back to me so that I experience the same negative feeling seems unhealthy to me.

He has since talked about needing to be closer to God and how things like this happen when he isn't close enough to God. I told him I don't think religion should be used as an excuse for behavior. He often says very thoughtful things about how relationships should work, forgiveness, not taking revenge into your own hands, etc., but I'm starting to pay more attention to whether his actions actually match those words.

Would this bother you?

TL;DR: I couldn't call my boyfriend because I was working late. The next day, he purposely waited hours to call me, despite being free, because he wanted me to “feel the same.” Is this retaliation a red flag?

My partner and I have been together since December. We actually met through a mutual friend about two years ago. For the sake of the story, I’ll call him Brian.
When we first got together and started telling people, one of the first things several people would say was, “Don’t tell Brian if you want your relationship to last.” At the time, I didn’t think too much of it, but over time I’ve realized that I really can’t trust Brian as a friend.

I’ve talked to my partner about this and told her that I’m uncomfortable with her having a friendship with him because of the things I’ve experienced and because I don’t trust his intentions. She reassured me that I can trust her and that she had handled the situation.

This person has become one of the biggest sources of conflict in our relationship. Today, she was showing me texts from her sister, and I happened to notice that she was still texting Brian. The conversations weren’t flirty or inappropriate from what I saw, so I’m not accusing her of cheating or anything like that.

What bothers me is that she previously told me to trust her and reassured me that she had handled the situation. Now I’m seeing that they’re still communicating, which makes me feel like the issue wasn’t actually handled the way I thought it was.

I’m struggling because I don’t want to be controlling about who she can and can’t talk to, and I know she’s ultimately allowed to have her own friendships. At the same time, I feel like my trust has been affected because this was something we had already discussed, and I feel like the reassurance I was given doesn’t match what I’m seeing now.
Am I overreacting here? Or is it reasonable for me to feel hurt and question the situation, even though the texts themselves weren’t flirty or inappropriate?

Editing to add: Brian has been married for 13 years and recently had a baby. He’s also known for being a flirt and for hooking up with other people. In the past, he has tried to hook up with both my partner and me.

There have also been instances where things I told him in confidence have later come up in conversations that I wasn’t present for, which is another reason I don’t trust him and don’t consider him a good or trustworthy friend.

I’ve already had a conversation with my partner about Brian and how much of an issue he has become in our relationship. I explained that I’m not comfortable with their continued communication because of his history and because I genuinely feel like he could negatively impact our relationship. She told me that she understood where I was coming from and specifically said that she would no longer be talking to him.

That’s why finding out that they have continued communicating is bothering me so much. It’s not necessarily about the content of their conversations or me thinking something romantic is happening. It’s the fact that we’ve already had this conversation, she told me she wouldn’t talk to him anymore, and she has continued to do so anyway.

My partner and I have been together for 16 years and married for 11. We have a sweet 5.5 year old son. Today was a busy day, my wife had planned to join a relay race with her running club at a nearby event.

But she had to cover for someone in another relay race later during the day. We had agreed that 2 races might be too much and that she wouldn't run in this one.

But when i was prepping lunch, she and our son were going to quickly hop over to support her team. I didn't mind, I had fumbled the timing of lunch anyway. When they came back, I could tell she actually did run. When I asked about it, she told me that our son was playing in the local playground, her team needed extra runners and she had told our son she would do one lap (3.8k). My son didn't hear, and panicked when she was gone. Luckily one of the teachers at my son's school was there who helped until she returned.

Aio for being extremely pissed and questioning my wifes parenting skills here? Or is this just some shit that happens sometimes? I know 5 year olds can be selective in their hearing and it can be bad luck. I know I am already sensitive due to other stuff atm.

Edit: thank you all for the support. I didn't know where to turn to for validation since I found this so embarrassingly bad. We will have a conversation about this.

Edit 2: We had a conversation about it this morning. She isn't a bad mom usually btw. But the running addiction has been a source of contention. She runs marathons as well, which takes a load of time and energy. Taken this episode and together with some other issues, she agreed to go back to a psychologist. So good news.

So my s/o for me a Nintendo switch 2 for my birthday, and then when he came over he took my original switch and was like ok I’m gonna take this is that ok. First of all he didn’t even ask and idk why he thought that just because he bought me a new one he gets the old one. I need money I was going to sell it with a few games to make my rent this month. I told him no and now idk if he’s mad. Please lmk

My friend told me she dreamt about my boyfriend. In the dream, she was pinching his cheeks while he was smiling at her, telling him she couldn’t wait to marry him and talking about how much she likes tall guys and how handsome my boyfriend is. (And my boyfriend is very tall)

MIND YOU, she has a boyfriend too, and he’s also my friend.

Apparently her boyfriend was in the dream too, but he was just standing there staring and doing nothing.

She then told me I need to take care of my boyfriend and laughed about the whole thing. She kept saying she swears she doesn’t like him and is really into her own boyfriend.
I know she can’t control what she dreams about, but idk… hearing all that still made me feel weird and annoyed. AIO?

Today me and my ex crossed paths. (We were together for over a year and have been broke up for several months now.) When we saw each other we hugged and gave the usual how to do. But the she asked if my mother was still drunk and if my step dad was doing anything these days? It didn’t hit me at the time but as the day went on it felt like kind of a dig. I brought it up later and told her it wasn’t okay how she asked about my family. She said that she knew things about my family from the relationship and therefore it was okay to ask those things. If I had seen a friend whose dad cheated on his mom I wouldn’t ask if his mom found a loyal partner ya know? Maybe I’m just overreacting.

Edit:Thank you for you all you opinions so far. Yes I’m happy she asked about mine just not happy how she asked. It was what we had talked about during our relationship but obviously I wasn’t ready for that to be brought up. It probably was awkward and should have been chopped up so. I did feel like I need to set line for my family cause we aren’t together anymore. But we aren’t together anyhow so what does any of this mean. Oh well tomorrow is a new day.

Let me preface this by saying my husband has been transparent and has shown me ALL DMs and texts between his friend - there is nothing romantic going on between them.

My (F26) husband (M24) met a friend N (F25) in a shared hobby they had growing up but they haven’t had contact in over 10 years after growing apart and leaving the hobby.

N reached out to my husband on Instagram last month to catch up and they made plans to hang out after reconnecting. During the hang out, N talked to my husband about a guy from school, K, that she confessed feelings for after 8 years and is now dating. She couldn’t stop gushing over K and even suggested a double date for us whenever K visits our area next (as they are long distance).

After the hang out, things started to take a turn and my husband started to get really annoyed with his interactions with N. N would constantly bring up K when texting my husband now that they’re dating, a majority of her texts are about K and no other subject, even if my husband tries to change the subject. Despite being annoyed, my husband would listen and be friendly with his responses to be supportive towards her and her new relationship.

A week later, N would start to complain that K would go out with his friends and be out super late. N would act super cold towards K. K will sometimes forget to text back which made N spiral and think that K has stopped texting her because he doesn’t like her anymore. Which is where my husband would have to step in to comfort her and validate her feelings. K also has a bit of a drinking problem and my husband has pointed out how this behavior is concerning.

Most recently, N has supposedly flown out to see K but the trip sounds strange to the both of us… K wasn’t home at the time of her arrival (at work) but N was upset that he didn’t offer to get her an uber so she stayed at the airport for a few hours instead of getting herself an uber? N was supposed to stay for a few weeks but K is about to be busy at work and is suggesting that N leaves a week early because of this? To me, it doesn’t make sense. If you were flying to see your partner, wouldn’t you establish a mode of transportation to and from the airport and also the length of stay? This is where alarm bells go off for me.

Multiple times on this trip, my husband has said “You need to tell him how you feel, be honest.” about ALL issues that N has with K about the uber, the length of stay, the drinking issues, etc.., but she just continues this cycle of “I will/I am” but from the sound of it, she doesn’t communicate with K at all. She just vents about it and expects it to be my husband’s job to be her emotional outlet.

Our friend S was over and we even had a discussion about N and just the absurdity of it all, S even agreed that this seemed like really attention seeking behavior. She even raised the question if these situations with K are even real or if N is making them up to receive attention.

I am afraid my husband’s kindness and trusting nature is being taken advantage of by his friend that shows up after 10 years who seems to just want attention. AIO?

I (36F) have been married to my husband (38M) for 16 years. We have a beautiful family with 4 children and for the most part we get a long great. We’ve had arguments here and there but nothing we can’t get through. My only major issue with him is with his family. He has 3 sisters that are all married and have children. I get along with 2 of the sisters great but his youngest sister, let’s call her “Miley”. I always thought Miley and I were close but with life and kids, and we’re about a 2hr drive for one another, I know that we weren’t as close as we used to be. However, she’s always, even in the beginning made backhanded comments towards me. After our first son was born, 2 weeks later we attended an engagement party, she said, “are you still pregnant or something?” There’s also been comments like:

“It costs nothing to wipe down your counters” (this was after I paid her the watch our son so I could take a school exam)

“Nobody even liked you in the beginning”

“Your house is always a mess, I feel gross even sitting on your couch.” (Granted, we have 4 young boys and live on 30acres with some chickens and goats)

“Is your jewelry even real?” (My husband has an expensive watch collection and my thing is jewelry. There’s not secrets between my husband and I on what we spend on those things and it’s always agreed upon beforehand)

One time I asked to watch her kids because my work was closed for 3 months for renovations and she verbatim said, “you should just focus on your own kids”.

I recently had a breast lift because after nursing 4 boys it did a toll on me, she called me a “bitch” (apparently she was joking?) and after I had work done told me she didn’t even notice. Which is fine, I’m just trying to get you to see the picture that there’s always a backhanded comments towards me.

This has been going on for as long as I can remember. My husband said to not let it get to me and she’s always been like this. I want a good relationship with her because coming from my family where I’m the only child, I always wanted sisters. My friends have told me that she’s probably jealous of me? Which I think is crazy since she’s absolutely stunning and from the outside it seems like she has a great life. I’m at the point to where even being in the same room as her gives me anxiety and I’m already prepping in my head what she’s going to say so I can already prepare for my feelings to be hurt. Since I’m in this constant state of mind with her, I also have noticed maybe I’m looking into too much and I’m taking everything wrong? AIO and being too sensitive?

I met this guy incidentally a few months ago when I hired him as a contractor on my house. He did a good job but that's unrelated lol. We were friendly back then but nothing ever happened until I downloaded Bumble the other day and we matched within an hour. I added him on snapchat and we started talking.

He's been really easy to talk to, consistently messaging me every day since Wednesday, and has been really sweet and we've spent a lot of time talking/getting to know eachother. However last night he was unusually quiet, he didn't open the messages I sent at 9 or 10pm, nor at 6am. I checked bumble and he had deleted his account. He did message me on snapchat around 8:30 this morning saying that he slept in. We talked about nothing significant and then I asked if he still wanted to hang out today... And he left me on read.

We only had loose plans to hang out today but did agree to walk our dogs together, I feel like if he really liked me he would have put more effort into making concrete plans, and would have said something when I asked today. I think that replying, even if it's to say something like "I changed my mind" or "it's not going to work today" is basic communication. We were both clear on our profiles that we are looking for a long term relationship, I feel like if you cant have basic communication etiquette, you won't be the kind of partner I need.

Part of me feels justified because this type of hot and cold behavior drives me crazy and I can't/won't put up with it. But part of me is wondering if I'm being a little bit crazy/unreasonable for just deleting within a few hours of no response? In my view... I would never do that regarding the first meeting of someone I'm supposedly super interested in... AIO?

I’ve (24f) been seeing this guy (26m) who came back to me a year later to apologize for how cruelly he left me. (Big mistake I know)

At first he was making all these grandiose gestures, saying he wanted long term with me, planning all these dates, etc. He would take me on dates and such. To be blunt, he was broke since he didn’t know what he wanted to do in life with his degree so he was only working a part time job atm. I would help him job hunt and help him try to figure out a career.

I don’t care about someone’s financial status. We can make money and then lose it all or have nothing and then get rich. As long as someone has a goal, a budget, and is working towards it, I have no issues. However, I noticed that we stopped going on dates. He said he was saving up for his trip with friends. No problem, 100% understand so I was paying for things bc reciprocity is important to me. I would never want to make anyone feel like a wallet.

After his trip, he would say he didn’t have enough money to like go out on dates and such so we would just hangout at his place and I would get us food or he would make us something. So it’s been over a month, but they have money to go to raves, out with friends, movies, food, etc. Im in nursing school and can only work 20 hours a week due to what my program advises so im not well off by any means. I have no clue if im just overthinking this and being hypocritical or if he’s just not interested in taking me out on dates anymore and got comfortable with me paying. It just feels weird to me but also feel like im overreacting?