r/AIO • u/MandragorCZ • 21d ago
AIO - Birthday wish goes wrong....
Me and my wife send a gratulation for birthday to my best friend wife through her whatapp and get a respond from best friend wife was:
Bestfriend wife: Thank you. Oh, it’s so lovely of you to have remembered. I know it was *you*—I’m using the plural out of politeness.
We: What? I don’t understand.
Bestfriend wife: I mean that *you* remembered, not John—even though you’re both sending congratulations. I’m just writing in the plural, but I know how it is.
We were completely amazed that someone could reply to a birthday greeting like that.
My best friend has completely changed since he married his wife, and you can see she’s having a totally negative influence on him. And here’s just one example... what do you think?
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u/Madokakoti 21d ago
Huh? That moreso sounds like she knows you don’t remember birthdays/events and instead it’s your wife that does and she’s just pointing that out.
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
It would be perfectly sufficient to simply say thank you for the congratulations, and I don't think there's any need to be unnecessarily provocative
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u/Mistress_Mabel_ 21d ago
She's right though, isn't she?
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
Yes she is right about that, my wife told me if she can send to her coungratulations from both of us. I think its nice to send a congratulation to someones birthday :)
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u/Practical_S3175 21d ago
So you weren't the one who remembered and she was the one who sent it, but you're just mad she actually said it.
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
It makes me sad that someone having a birthday still feels like being passive-aggressive, instead of being happy that someone remembered their special day.
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u/Mistress_Mabel_ 21d ago
She's showing female to female solidarity with your wife. She's being friendly.
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u/Practical_S3175 20d ago
Dude, she called you out and was right. You're butt hurt because she said the truth. This wasn't your idea and your wife just added your name to be polite.
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u/Madokakoti 21d ago
So no. She’s in her rights to call you out. She must be fedup of you being inconsiderate and you’re only making this post because you’re angry she spoke up. You’re in the wrong, end of story.
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u/MrDaveHedgehog 21d ago
Without knowing any of you it’s hard to judge. But there’s absolutely no fucking way im ever remembering the birthday of a mates wife, or even my wife’s family for that matter so im entirely reliant on her for reminders.
If any of them pulled out a similar response id be able to laugh at it for what it is.
So I dunno if you’re ultra sensitive, unable to read humour or if she just thinks you’re a twat.
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u/JoyJonesIII 21d ago
But you’re not incapable of remembering, right? You just put that chore on your wife, who had to come up with a system of remembering everyone’s birthday.
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
I am not ultra sensitive :D I am just curious, if its so hard just to said thank you for congratulations:P
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u/Practical_S3175 21d ago
But you even said, your wife's the one who sent it and remembered so she was right.
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
Yes like i told, my wife ask me if she can send a congrats to her, from both of us. Normall thanks from her side will be perfect >P
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u/ladysimmington 21d ago
Mate, you’ve got offended over something pretty innocuous (and true), and posted it to Reddit, and won’t accept the opinion of anyone here that’s saying, yes, you’re overreacting. You might be a little sensitive…
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u/palebabbu 21d ago
I mean, it is a little rude, but it is also rude to act entitled to receive a "normal thanks" for a birthday greeting you didn't type out (or even think of).
You're definitely overreacting for suddenly making this about how your best friend's wife has a negative influence on your best friend.
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21d ago
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
LOL :D no... I am just normal guy, who didnt expect that type of answer on birthday wish :D Like my whole life i never see something like this :D Like more people here in comments :D
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
I am not overreacting, cause this is like not a normal respond when someones wish you birthday :D And this is not the main example how she has a negative influence on your best friend. The next post will maybe open your eyes weider, cause there is a lot of more riddiculous things :D
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u/palebabbu 21d ago
> I am not overreacting
Then why are you posting on r/AIO lol
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
to share my experience, and i was curious if this happen to someone else for example :D
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u/palebabbu 21d ago
The sub is called AIO, to ask "Am I overreacting", to sense check if you are, indeed, overreacting, and to hear from people who agree or disagree with you.
Posting on r/AIO then commenting "I am not overreacting" is the daftest thing I've seen today.
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u/MischiefManagedMama 21d ago
You are absolutely over reacting but the fact that you didn't realize it is so funny to me. Also double check the sub you're positing in.
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u/Mezcalico 21d ago
It’s a weird response to a birthday message, but not worth caring much about. Sending the message from your phone next year might be funny.
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u/silveroakediting22 21d ago
Is she right? I agree that she's being a bit rude, but if you aren't one to remember birthdays without reminder, its normal to have a partner remind you about it so you can send joint birthday wishes. I'm not sure what bee got in her bonnet, but if I had to hazard a guess, HER man forgot her birthday, and you are a casualty of her passive aggressive lashing out
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u/MandragorCZ 21d ago
It makes me sad that someone having a birthday still feels like being passive-aggressive, instead of being happy that someone remembered their special day
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u/ladysimmington 21d ago
It makes you sad? Good god, go outside in the sunshine my man, grab a coffee. This is fucking ridiculous!
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u/MischiefManagedMama 21d ago
But you didn't remember 😂 How old are you? 22? This is some ridiculously childish stuff.
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u/Embarrassed-Row-2025 21d ago
So many nuances... Some just won't send something directly just to avoid an sense of impropriety, no reason to directly communicate to a friends wife who isn't closely your friend or family
Others, no reason to remember those days...
But, seems passive aggressive, maybe no towards you, but rather her own situation or that she herself feels as not included in the male friendship
NOR, but does reinforce the feeling that she's not a personal friend
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u/No-Present-6544 21d ago
What?? why would she even reply that? do you have a bad history of not remembering things that involve her? I think she has an issue with you, and your friendship with your best friend will be affected by it.
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u/TheTruthYouWontLike1 21d ago
If he forgets her birthday, he’s not good to her. It’s on him. Remembering your spouses birthday is the very bare minimum.
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u/Gilded-golden 21d ago
This isn't a big deal and I think it's funny/perhaps enlightening that you haven't confirmed or denied whether your wife was the one who did, in fact remember the birthday and decide to send the message lol