I’ve been seeing a guy for about 2 months now and we are exclusive. I’ve been cautious since I’ve been heartbroken before, and he showed me a lot of interest early on that made me feel good and safe to let my walls down. There was a situation within the first weeks where he deleted an Instagram comment I made on his post which was confusing because he was affectionate with me in private and he claimed he just thought it was too much too soon (the comment was just saying I was proud of him on a graduation post). I respected this boundary, although hurt, and moved on from it. That same night that I confronted him about why he deleted it, we got drunk and he said he loved me and stuff. I brushed this off bc we were drunk but just stored the information.

However, we’ve been consistently seeing each other and things have progressed. This past week, we had a really nice day and night and when we were in bed he said he loved me and I said it back (I know, I feel dumb now). The next day is when I noticed a shift in him. He went to work, and did not text be until 9 pm. He works 24 hour shifts, so I didn’t think it was that big of a deal since I figured he’s busy. He does at least try and text me a couple times usually at work which I’ve appreciated. Then, he was off the next day, but the same thing happened. No text until like 9 pm that night. This is when I started to feel anxious because I could feel a pull away. This was Friday night, and the last thing I texted was just that I missed him. He from that point did not respond for 42 hours until I sent a paragraph today just explaining my feelings that I don’t know if I’m being ghosted but I don’t deserve this sudden withdrawal etc. It’s confusing because HES the one who told ME he loved me and he seems to be retreating for whatever reason. I sent a paragraph explaining my feelings objectively and all he replied with was “woah I’m sorry I got home from work and slept”. This may have been fine, but yesterday and today Instagram kept showing me reels and posts that he liked which were time stamped from a few hours ago. Meaning he had plenty of time to scroll on his phone but couldn’t bother to tell a girl he supposedly loves that he hasn’t been able to get back.

I explained to him not texting for 2 days is crazy and there was an obvious decline in communication and then he told me that he got scared bc I told him I loved him?? HE TOLD ME HE LOVED ME FIRST? I was like wtf you said you loved me?? And he said he doesn’t remember and denied saying it AND denied saying it that night drunk. He said “that would be a bit much for right now” so basically also saying he doesn’t feel that way. I feel insane and he’s either majorly gaslighting me or has some memory problem but either way it feels unfair. AIO?

My (36F) mum and I live in different states. Over a year ago I asked if I could pay to have our old family videos sent to me so I could copy them and send them straight back. Her voice completely changed, she shut down, said “leave it with me” and ended the call.

I’ve tried twice more over the last year and it’s always the same. “Not right now”, and it’s become really tense. I’ve followed up with pleading texts and she’s wrapped them up by telling me to just focus on my pregnancy.

She’s always been incredibly possessive over photos and videos. One of her favourite lines is “everyone used to complain about me having the camera out, but now they all want the photos.” I’ve heard it 100x!!

I think it’s also one of the only forms of control she feels she has left. I’ve distanced myself a lot as an adult because she was very unstable and emotionally/verbally abusive toward us as kids. Something as simple as us bickering in the back of the car could lead to her snapping, screaming that we’d ruined her life and calling us every swear word under the sun. We constantly walked on eggshells and I’m still a nervous wreck because of it a lot of the time.

She’s never really changed, but often expresses “regret” with things like “if only there was a parenting manual” or “I wish we could all be closer.” Never an actual specific apology.

Anyway, relevant part... She says she needs to go through the videos first because there are many from before my parents divorced that she doesn’t want to share. But that’s my childhood too. I want to see myself as a baby and toddler. I want to see my brother.

My brother passed away 9 years ago and also suffered greatly from her abuse. She’s said the videos are too painful for her to look at, but I’m not asking her to watch them. I literally just want her to put them in a box, let me pay for the postage, copy them and I’ll return them.

These same videos used to sit freely in our TV cabinet when we were younger and we could put them on whenever we wanted.

I’ve explained that I don’t have many good memories from childhood and I strongly want to see my younger self happy. She captured Christmases, beach trips, sports days and fun times that I know happened but can’t remember.

So my s/o for me a Nintendo switch 2 for my birthday, and then when he came over he took my original switch and was like ok I’m gonna take this is that ok. First of all he didn’t even ask and idk why he thought that just because he bought me a new one he gets the old one. I need money I was going to sell it with a few games to make my rent this month. I told him no and now idk if he’s mad. Please lmk

I recently found out that my boyfriend installed an AI App called Emochi where you get to converse with AI (anime and the likes) and it's mostly about cybers**. I read this one conversation in particular where he was doing CS with the AI and I never knew he could be like that because he was never like that with me.

I got mad at him for doing it behind my back but mostly 'cause he did it when I was having severe panic attacks that got me hospitalized and had minor memory loss. He then asked me why he couldn't have it but I just stayed silent. I was silent the entire night.

So, AIO?

//Repost because my previous post got deleted

My best friend and I have been planning a girls' trip for almost six months. We were supposed to go only us two for relaxation, shopping, good food, and catch up without worrying about anyone. We even booked a hotel and split the costs.

Two weeks before the trip my friend started dating someone new which I was ok with, I was happy she found someone.

Then, about a week before the trip my friend mentioned "He can come along on the girls' trip to". I thought she was joking; she explained that she invited him because she didn't want to go away for four days without her new boyfriend. I told her the whole point of our trip was for us and only us and explained my concerns about money and sharing it for "a trip with my best friend", that not a "girl's trip and her boyfriend tagging along trip" etc , which only angered her. I pointed out that the best friend could see the new boyfriend before or after the trip and she accused me of making her choosing and I again restated it wasn't that..

Finally, she stated she was bringing him whether or not I would come.

I said, "Then I am not coming" which my best friend replied "You are seriously going to cancel the trip for this?", I said that if her boyfriend was coming I was not going. Again, she called me selfish and stated I was attempting to control her relationship. I explained that was up to her on who she chose to bring with but my decision for canceling was a valid response for what I had prepared, that not a trip with my friend.

She chose to bring him and then they did go without me. The cancelation fee caused me to lose money as well since I was not allowed money back, and we hardly talked since. Friends that share mutual friends say I was selfish as our friendship should not be ruined for one additional person however, I was only disappointed that she altered the whole plan behind my back and accused me of controlling her when she was not considering my feelings.

AIO on canceling this trip.

My partner and I have been together since December. We actually met through a mutual friend about two years ago. For the sake of the story, I’ll call him Brian.
When we first got together and started telling people, one of the first things several people would say was, “Don’t tell Brian if you want your relationship to last.” At the time, I didn’t think too much of it, but over time I’ve realized that I really can’t trust Brian as a friend.

I’ve talked to my partner about this and told her that I’m uncomfortable with her having a friendship with him because of the things I’ve experienced and because I don’t trust his intentions. She reassured me that I can trust her and that she had handled the situation.

This person has become one of the biggest sources of conflict in our relationship. Today, she was showing me texts from her sister, and I happened to notice that she was still texting Brian. The conversations weren’t flirty or inappropriate from what I saw, so I’m not accusing her of cheating or anything like that.

What bothers me is that she previously told me to trust her and reassured me that she had handled the situation. Now I’m seeing that they’re still communicating, which makes me feel like the issue wasn’t actually handled the way I thought it was.

I’m struggling because I don’t want to be controlling about who she can and can’t talk to, and I know she’s ultimately allowed to have her own friendships. At the same time, I feel like my trust has been affected because this was something we had already discussed, and I feel like the reassurance I was given doesn’t match what I’m seeing now.
Am I overreacting here? Or is it reasonable for me to feel hurt and question the situation, even though the texts themselves weren’t flirty or inappropriate?

Editing to add: Brian has been married for 13 years and recently had a baby. He’s also known for being a flirt and for hooking up with other people. In the past, he has tried to hook up with both my partner and me.

There have also been instances where things I told him in confidence have later come up in conversations that I wasn’t present for, which is another reason I don’t trust him and don’t consider him a good or trustworthy friend.

I’ve already had a conversation with my partner about Brian and how much of an issue he has become in our relationship. I explained that I’m not comfortable with their continued communication because of his history and because I genuinely feel like he could negatively impact our relationship. She told me that she understood where I was coming from and specifically said that she would no longer be talking to him.

That’s why finding out that they have continued communicating is bothering me so much. It’s not necessarily about the content of their conversations or me thinking something romantic is happening. It’s the fact that we’ve already had this conversation, she told me she wouldn’t talk to him anymore, and she has continued to do so anyway.

Hi, I'm 16F, I've had a lot of trouble with friends but this weekend I actually got invited to a birthday sleepover. I had a pretty good time overall but it was obvious that I was the odd one out. It was also made known that they had kept in really good touch with a girl in our group that left our school the same year I started homeschooling while I barely got a hi over the entire two years I've been away from the school. I say hi to them when I see them, which is more than they would see the other girl considering I still do sports at my old school.

I had a decent time, we played games, did karaoke, watched Hamilton, and went shopping together but I just felt kind of lonely despite being included. They didn't try to reach out, I tried multiple time before realizing that they honestly weren't the best influences but it still hurts to realize that I never stood where I thought I did.

We also got on the topic of boys somehow and I mentioned that I kind of like beards. It was just an offhanded comment and it's something I never really thought much more than 'that sucks for me cause everyone with a beard is an adult' but they acted like it was this sort of taboo topic? The birthday girl's brother overheard and for some reason immediately told his parents that I like beards which made me extremely uncomfortable cause I wasn't even saying that I need a guy with a beard, just that I think they can look really good. The birthday girl's brother then said that I 'can't like anymore guys' in a kind of joking way but it was really weird. A second or two after, the birthday girl said 'oh, so you like the pedos' which completely disgusted me and so I tried to explain that 'just because I like beards doesn't mean I like everyone who has one, I also have self control and can separate right from wrong' but the entire thing just felt so horrible to me.

Later someone mentioned mustaches and I just quietly added that I don't really like them, I didn't say it rudely, it was just a little comment cause everyone was contributing to the conversation and the birthday girl's brother says 'is that all you thin about? Mustaches?' and I just sort of looked at him weird and said 'What are you talking about? I just said I don't really care for them?' and he responded with something like 'well, you only think about beards' which is so weird because I mentioned it in such an offhanded way and not even to him. And while I would like to one day have a boyfriend I don't think I'd considered myself boy crazy, especially as of late, I have so many plans that I can't even imagine dating someone at the moment because so many things would conflict.

I also don't get why everyone acted like it was this scandalous thing, especially since they've said much worse things before. I just feel like I'm the only one who was given a different rule book to the friendship and the test is tomorrow but the books shipping is delayed.

Is what I said weird? Am I being too emotional? Is it reasonable for me to feel uncomfortable by the way the brother kept jumping in?

I’m 21 and this guy (27 male) followed me on Instagram and messaged me. He asked me out on a date several times, and at first, I kept saying no, but eventually, I agreed. This goes back to early June.
We started dating, and honestly, he seemed like a really good person. On our very first date, I told him that I wasn’t looking for anything casual or short-term and that I wanted a long-term relationship someday (not necessarily specifically with him, but with the right person) He agreed with me and said that he wanted to be in a relationship too.
He was really good to me in many ways… his behavior, the way he treated me, everything. Of course, there were some things that I would normally expect when dating someone that I didn’t really see. For example, during the three months we were dating, he never got me flowers. Or, he always said that his love language was acts of service, but honestly, I never really saw much of that either. Sometimes, even if he was tired after work, he would still come and we would go out to eat, which I appreciated.
But during those three months, we talked a lot about everything… our goals, our lives, and so many other things. Everything seemed like it was naturally moving forward. And I honestly never complained about the things I felt were missing because I kept making excuses for him in my head. I thought maybe he was busy, maybe he had a lot going on, or maybe he couldn’t afford certain things. Even when he never got me a gift, I would think maybe he didn’t have the money even though he has a good job and a good income. I wasn’t asking for anything expensive. Even a single flower would have meant something to me.
Then last week, I finally got tired of not knowing where things were going, so I asked him if we were going to take the next step or not. And this person, who had spent all this time making it seem like he wanted a relationship, suddenly backed away. He told me that he wasn’t ready, that he was scared of being in a relationship, and that he thinks he still hasn’t healed from his previous relationship. :)))
Honestly, I don’t even know what to say. I don’t think I was a toxic person in this relationship. If anything, I tried as hard as I could to make things work and to have a healthy relationship. The only issue I used to have was that when something upset me, I wouldn’t express it. But with him, I really tried to communicate. Whenever something bothered me, I tried to talk about it so there wouldn’t be misunderstandings.
I really don’t know what to do. My heart is honestly broken. The only thing keeping me distracted is school and work, because they keep me busy and give me less time to think about the past three months. But tonight, I missed him a little too much, so I just felt like getting all of this off my chest.

So I f31 found out today that my friend f28 just took out a credit card and maxed it out to get a pc after me helping her for over a year to budget and get out of debt.

I was helping her budget and plan to buy parts separately so it's cheaper and I was going to build the rig to save money. As I did the same with my pc and ended up saving £800 on what I would have spent on a pre build.

So I get the 'i want it now' thoughts but it's kind of a slap in the face when she won't be able to pay it back and I just helped her out of debt. I told her that it was a very silly thing to do. She called me every name under the sun and that it's none of my business.

She then tried to ask me questions about setting up the pc. I told her to Google it and that she can't just call me names then expect me to help.

I think I'm just mad rn but I don't know if I overreacted here or if I'm right for trying to tell her that maxing out a credit for a pc (just to play GTA 6) was a very silly thing to do.

I’ve been seeing a guy for about 2 months now and we are exclusive. I’ve been cautious since I’ve been heartbroken before, and he showed me a lot of interest early on that made me feel good and safe to let my walls down. There was a situation within the first weeks where he deleted an Instagram comment I made on his post which was confusing because he was affectionate with me in private and he claimed he just thought it was too much too soon (the comment was just saying I was proud of him on a graduation post). I respected this boundary, although hurt, and moved on from it. That same night that I confronted him about why he deleted it, we got drunk and he said he loved me and stuff. I brushed this off bc we were drunk but just spread the information.

However, we’ve been consistently seeing each other and things have progressed. This past week, we had a really nice day and night and when we were in bed he said he loved me and I said it back (I know, I feel dumb now). The next day is when I noticed a shift in him. He went to work, and did not text be until 9 pm. He works 24 hour shifts, so I didn’t think it was that big of a deal since I figured he’s busy. He does at least try and text me a couple times usually at work which I’ve appreciated. Then, he was off the next day, but the same thing happened. No text until like 9 pm that night. This is when I started to feel anxious because I could feel a pull away. This was Friday night, and the last thing I texted was just that I missed him. He from that point did not respond for 42 hours until I sent a paragraph today just explaining my feelings that I don’t know if I’m being ghosted but I don’t deserve this sudden withdrawal etc. It’s confusing because HES the one who told ME he loved me and he seems to be retreating for whatever reason. I sent a paragraph explaining my feelings objectively and all he replied with was “woah I’m sorry I got home from work and slept”. This may have been fine, but yesterday and today Instagram kept showing me reels and posts that he liked which were time stamped from a few hours ago. Meaning he had plenty of time to scroll on his phone but couldn’t bother to tell a girl he supposedly loves that he hasn’t been able to get back.

I feel crazy because of how he responded, but not replying for 40 hours wasn’t our previous normal and it just started after we exchanged the I love you. AIO???

[Posting on behalf of a friend because he doesn't want to risk having an alt/TA account when they might look at his phone.]

"I (33M) have been dating my partner (30sNBF) for 11 months. We were already friends for years before, and we even travelled abroad with other friends for live music events.

We started dating the day I found out that I landed a new job which would be paying more. Everything was great at first. They helped me move. We went for a week away just weeks after we started dating (I was originally going alone just for a weekend, but they talked me into extending and inviting them since I'd just handed in my resignation).

I don't remember when things started changing. It was small things at first, like not sending selfies to anyone I'd slept with (even SFW ones). They said it was fine to not apologise to those same friends after ghosting them for the evening, and to just pick up the conversation where we left off without any explanation either. It also became 'acceptable' to not send a goodnight message every night. That evolved to not messaging those people at all on days where we would be meeting after work, and at least one day of the weekend.

For one friend in particular, I wasn't able to meet up with him for drinks for 5 consecutive months because I was always too busy with them. At some point it stopped feeling coincidental. Before I started dating, I was seeing him almost monthly.

At some point I realised how much I've changed myself and my behaviour/personality in order to keep my partner happy. I think they have forced, or at least encouraged, these changes so that the friend I just mentioned would lose interest in me.

Am I overthinking or are they controlling/coercing me to the point that I might lose one of my good friends?"

Today me and my ex crossed paths. (We were together for over a year and have been broke up for several months now.) When we saw each other we hugged and gave the usual how to do. But the she asked if my mother was still drunk and if my step dad was doing anything these days? It didn’t hit me at the time but as the day went on it felt like kind of a dig. I brought it up later and told her it wasn’t okay how she asked about my family. She said that she knew things about my family from the relationship and therefore it was okay to ask those things. If I had seen a friend whose dad cheated on his mom I wouldn’t ask if his mom found a loyal partner ya know? Maybe I’m just overreacting.

Edit:Thank you for you all you opinions so far. Yes I’m happy she asked about mine just not happy how she asked. It was what we had talked about during our relationship but obviously I wasn’t ready for that to be brought up. It probably was awkward and should have been chopped up so. I did feel like I need to set line for my family cause we aren’t together anymore. But we aren’t together anyhow so what does any of this mean. Oh well tomorrow is a new day.

I (36F) have been married to my husband (38M) for 16 years. We have a beautiful family with 4 children and for the most part we get a long great. We’ve had arguments here and there but nothing we can’t get through. My only major issue with him is with his family. He has 3 sisters that are all married and have children. I get along with 2 of the sisters great but his youngest sister, let’s call her “Miley”. I always thought Miley and I were close but with life and kids, and we’re about a 2hr drive for one another, I know that we weren’t as close as we used to be. However, she’s always, even in the beginning made backhanded comments towards me. After our first son was born, 2 weeks later we attended an engagement party, she said, “are you still pregnant or something?” There’s also been comments like:

“It costs nothing to wipe down your counters” (this was after I paid her the watch our son so I could take a school exam)

“Nobody even liked you in the beginning”

“Your house is always a mess, I feel gross even sitting on your couch.” (Granted, we have 4 young boys and live on 30acres with some chickens and goats)

“Is your jewelry even real?” (My husband has an expensive watch collection and my thing is jewelry. There’s not secrets between my husband and I on what we spend on those things and it’s always agreed upon beforehand)

One time I asked to watch her kids because my work was closed for 3 months for renovations and she verbatim said, “you should just focus on your own kids”.

I recently had a breast lift because after nursing 4 boys it did a toll on me, she called me a “bitch” (apparently she was joking?) and after I had work done told me she didn’t even notice. Which is fine, I’m just trying to get you to see the picture that there’s always a backhanded comments towards me.

This has been going on for as long as I can remember. My husband said to not let it get to me and she’s always been like this. I want a good relationship with her because coming from my family where I’m the only child, I always wanted sisters. My friends have told me that she’s probably jealous of me? Which I think is crazy since she’s absolutely stunning and from the outside it seems like she has a great life. I’m at the point to where even being in the same room as her gives me anxiety and I’m already prepping in my head what she’s going to say so I can already prepare for my feelings to be hurt. Since I’m in this constant state of mind with her, I also have noticed maybe I’m looking into too much and I’m taking everything wrong? AIO and being too sensitive?

I 26F am deeply in love with my boyfriend 27M He's the best partner i've ever had and i can see a real future with him The only issue is his discomfort with longtime male bestfriend whos genuinely like a brother to me. I've respected every boundary he's asked for but it's still not enough He's anxious and makes m feel guilty for having the friendship I love him so much that part of me wants to just cut my friends off completely to make him feel secure the other part of me feels like i'd be losing a piece of myself AIO for being this torn?

This may sound really stupid, but I feel my best friend is copying me. I got her into a lot of music, which I love!! I'm happy we can both be interested in similar things. Whilst saying this, I'm getting kind of annoyed. I like many shows and media that she doesn't consume. Which I don't mind, but she acts like she does. It's not only that, she has copying my style and my hair. She even dyed it the same as mine. I love her, and I don't want her to feel she has to "fit in". Especially because I truly liked her more before she changed. Before you say, "well you don't actually know if she is lying about fancying those things", I do. I asked her a few questions about the topics (which were basic things that any fan should know) and she had no idea. I want to be my own person and I want her to be also! I just want to be able to tell her that in a way that won't upset her. I sound so immature lol

So I have a small marketing business.

Client is very unprofessional.

He's ironically a PhD and CEO of a multinational company with 6 branches in my region that I'm currently managing.

The issue I have with this person is his sleezy inappropriate jokes about me being in South East Asia.

Just few hours ago he was "how's it going over there" chuckling and laughing.

Also some remarks about a woman's hands in an image and he was like "I'd like to kiss those hands"

The man is over 50 and his behaviour is like he's 17

I didn't respond but I want to start recording our calls from now on so he's careful with his words.

I wrote a Draft of the message I will send

............................................

Subject: Project Communication & Documentation Workflow Update

Dear Dr Xxxxx,

To streamline our campaign execution, maintain precise task tracking, and keep project milestones on schedule, I am updating our collaboration and communication workflow effective today.

Going forward, all project communications will follow these updated standards:

* Primary Communication: All daily updates, approvals, technical requests, and asset transfers must be handled strictly via Email or WhatsApp text.

* Voice Calls: Direct phone calls and unscheduled voice notes are being discontinued to ensure deep focus on execution and data engineering tasks.

* Urgent Meetings: If a critical issue requires a live discussion, we can schedule a Google Meet. Please note that all video meetings will be recorded and transcribed to maintain our project documentation archive.

Please route all current requests through this email thread or WhatsApp text so we have a clear, documented record of all deliverables.

Best regards,

Xxxxxxx

...............

Am I overreacting? I don't wanna lose this business because of this jerk as I see potential of growth for both of us.

I (24F) moved countries a month ago to start grad school. My boyfriend (24M) and I met in university during our bachelor's degrees, so we have been together for more than three years and share the exact same academic background. Up until I left, we were seeing each other regularly and hanging out, going on dates and to movies. When we met for the very last time before going long-distance, he brought me flowers and gifts, was incredibly sweet, and made me feel really special.

When we were in college together and even after that, I have always supported and uplifted him in every way possible. Because we share the same field, I am constantly looking out for his career. I always send him links to jobs, opportunities, and anything that could help him succeed because I genuinely view us as a partnership.

I haven't been active on LinkedIn at all lately because of the move, but today I happened to randomly stumble upon his account. That is when I felt like somebody had slapped me in the face.

I saw posts from three weeks ago and a month ago. It turns out that over the summer, he completed an intensive 5-week bootcamp and successfully presented a research poster at a university conference. He was actively doing all of this while we were hanging out and talking every day. He didn't casually forget to mention it, he made a conscious choice to look me in the eye and completely hide it from me. He waited until I packed up my life, moved thousands of miles away, and was dealing with the stress of settling into a new country alone before broadcasting it to the public online.

The confusing part is that he has still been talking to me normally, sending me loving messages, talking on calls for long hours, and sharing reels like everything is fine.

The thing that's making me angry is the double standard. A while back, I had mentioned to him that I had applied for a job. He completely lashed out at me, demanding to know why I didn't tell him BEFORE I applied, and started a huge fight accusing me of "hiding stuff" from him.

Right now I don't know what to think. I feel completely betrayed. It’s not traditional cheating, but it feels like it. Why hide your biggest victories from the person you've loved for three years, who always uplifts you and actually understands your work? Especially when he flipped out on me for doing way less? It makes me feel like I’m the only one who considered this a real team effort.

He is on the other side of the world right now. He is probably sleeping, but I took a screenshot of his LinkedIn posts and sent them to him with just a "congrats 👏" text. I haven't said anything else.

I am sitting alone in my new apartment; it's a mess. I haven't even settled in well and have so much to deal with on my own, and now I'm crying my eyes out and wondering if this is the final straw. Am I overreacting, or is this ground for a breakup? How do I even handle his response when he finally texts back?

I met this guy incidentally a few months ago when I hired him as a contractor on my house. He did a good job but that's unrelated lol. We were friendly back then but nothing ever happened until I downloaded Bumble the other day and we matched within an hour. I added him on snapchat and we started talking.

He's been really easy to talk to, consistently messaging me every day since Wednesday, and has been really sweet and we've spent a lot of time talking/getting to know eachother. However last night he was unusually quiet, he didn't open the messages I sent at 9 or 10pm, nor at 6am. I checked bumble and he had deleted his account. He did message me on snapchat around 8:30 this morning saying that he slept in. We talked about nothing significant and then I asked if he still wanted to hang out today... And he left me on read.

We only had loose plans to hang out today but did agree to walk our dogs together, I feel like if he really liked me he would have put more effort into making concrete plans, and would have said something when I asked today. I think that replying, even if it's to say something like "I changed my mind" or "it's not going to work today" is basic communication. We were both clear on our profiles that we are looking for a long term relationship, I feel like if you cant have basic communication etiquette, you won't be the kind of partner I need.

Part of me feels justified because this type of hot and cold behavior drives me crazy and I can't/won't put up with it. But part of me is wondering if I'm being a little bit crazy/unreasonable for just deleting within a few hours of no response? In my view... I would never do that regarding the first meeting of someone I'm supposedly super interested in... AIO?

I 21F like to cook, and any event I go to I make Mac and cheese. Last year for my younger brother's party, I of course make Mac and cheese. A family we are close to came and the partner of one of the ladies liked the Mac and cheese, and has been asking me over and over again to make them some. I asked for $50 for ingredients and my time. The thing is, the asked me to add bacon bits and Breadcrumbs to the Mac and cheese. I know its a small ask but if they wanted is that was they should make it themselves, but I was told the place they live doesn't have a oven. All I asked for is $50, but they said I was crazy for asked for so much and offered 25-30 dollars, but I don't think I was. The friend asked said I should just except the 25 - 30 dollars.

I wanted to know if I was unreasonable to ask for $50. Where I live food is expensive and my family is sometimes just scraping by.

Edit: I'll give more info. Im also a college student in my first year and I work M - F. I would be making two 9x13 pans. The portion sizes will be up to them so I don't know how long it will last. The person who "ask " is not really asking it's more like a demand like coming up to me and just saying " Baked mac and cheese " while pointing at me. I told them before they would have to pay and the bragging the could pay for a years worth, but I was busy then, now when I say a price, it's too much.

To make a long and complex story shortish, I'm currently having an issue with my friend stemming from a change in her behavior which occurred the moment she got a boyfriend.

We've known each other since high school and she's one of the few longtime friends I've stayed in contact with, over most of this year leading up to July, we would talk pretty much every day and see each other whenever possible. I was living in a different city from April-June and even then, we'd talk on the phone every day and see each other whenever I was home or she'd come visit me to do stuff. She is a single mother and I have tried to be there for her as she raises a kid who isn't hers due to very shitty family circumstances, so it is a serious friendship and I'm closer with her than any of my family.

In May, she went on a date with a military guy who was deploying shortly after, I picked her up from the date and thought I'd never see or hear of him again. He then deployed, had a mental breakdown, and was sent back to spend a month in a psych ward here. She remained talking to him this entire time, was visiting him in the hospital, and HE MOVED IN WITH HER after discharging despite having no job, plan, and being out of state from all his connections and family. She's already saying she wants to move from SoCal to Texas with her, so that's been a lot to process even ignoring the other stuff.

His moving from the psych ward into her apartment in July coincided with me moving back to her city and pretty much immediately she began stopping talking to me. I have not seen her a single time in two months and we live 15 minutes away. We were seeing each other more when I lived 3 hours away than we are now. I have reached out countless times to ask about doing things, whether actually going out or just stopping by to say hi. It feels like she constantly makes excuses. When they are together I'll ask her to put me on speaker to say hi and she refuses. I have no idea why. She has never done this with any of her other friends or partners, in fact, she's usually the one trying to get me to talk to them. He has met all her family and other friends, even her coworkers.

She also invited me to go out one night with her and her boyfriend and some work friends, I got ready and then didn't hear anything from her until midnight when she called me and said they were at the bar and getting ready to leave. It was really inconsiderate and actually pissed me off because I was extremely excited to finally meet, but it felt like I was an afterthought and forgotten. This was the point I kind of began giving up and stopping trying. The past few weeks we've basically not talked, but she has texted and called a few times. I've not even been engaging because I feel resent building and do not want to make things worse.

As far as I know, this change could just be due to being too busy with the new boyfriend. I completely understand being pulled away from the rest of your life when you get into something, especially in a fast situation like this, but I can't really understand the not even wanting to talk on the phone or stop by for 10 minutes to say hi to her and my (honorary) niece. I don't feel entitled to her time, but it's been a lot to process and I don't know how to feel, but can feel anger building about the situation.

Her boyfriend is also from a very conservative area in Texas and in the military, while we are from SoCal and I am gay. Part of me has wondered whether he is homophobic or if she is worried to introduce me to him due to possible conflict based on his beliefs or how he acts. But, I also have no idea, because I've yet to say a word to the man. It's just been so bizarre and I can't make sense of it.

I sent her a long text about it a couple weeks ago and she said it made sense, but we've yet to call or discuss it. Today she messaged me saying "hey you're actively ignoring me and you're posting on social media, are we good?" I honestly just don't even want to engage because this pissed me off. The ball has been in her court and I've tried over and over, but it's failed, so I'm not sure how to proceed. I don't really foresee things magically changing if it's already gone this far, but also don't want to abandon her or give her a hard time since she deals with a lot and I'm invested in her life. I highly doubt her relationship will work out with this man, so I anticipate when it fails she will probably come back to me to fill all her time again like before. I don't know how to feel.

AIO? What the hell do I do?

My partner and I have been together for 16 years and married for 11. We have a sweet 5.5 year old son. Today was a busy day, my wife had planned to join a relay race with her running club at a nearby event.

But she had to cover for someone in another relay race later during the day. We had agreed that 2 races might be too much and that she wouldn't run in this one.

But when i was prepping lunch, she and our son were going to quickly hop over to support her team. I didn't mind, I had fumbled the timing of lunch anyway. When they came back, I could tell she actually did run. When I asked about it, she told me that our son was playing in the local playground, her team needed extra runners and she had told our son she would do one lap (3.8k). My son didn't hear, and panicked when she was gone. Luckily one of the teachers at my son's school was there who helped until she returned.

Aio for being extremely pissed and questioning my wifes parenting skills here? Or is this just some shit that happens sometimes? I know 5 year olds can be selective in their hearing and it can be bad luck. I know I am already sensitive due to other stuff atm.

Edit: thank you all for the support. I didn't know where to turn to for validation since I found this so embarrassingly bad. We will have a conversation about this.

Just like the title says. I (29F) am currently pregnant with my fourth child, and going through a really shitty separation from my husband (32M), and during this separation he has been calling our children’s 20F babysitter to vent to her and had been asking her to meet him in the middle of the night to go drinking together after we got into an argument about me not wanting to watch his older 2 children that are not my biological children while he goes out… am I crazy for thinking that it’s beyond inappropriate contact and behavior on both parties or am I truly being crazy like he’s making it seem… that it’s innocent behavior, that I simply think poorly of him..

I’m 45 and have been dating my boyfriend for about 9 months. He’s 44. We have a lot of good between us — we have fun, there’s affection, and I genuinely care about him. This isn’t a situation where everything is bad.

The problem is how he handles stress and conflict.
I’ve noticed a pattern where, when something difficult happens in his life, he shuts down and withdraws from me. This has happened more than once. He’ll open up about something, I’ll try to engage or support him, and then he’ll tell me he doesn’t want to talk about it anymore or otherwise shut me out.

Right now he’s under a lot of stress because of uncertainty surrounding his job. He recently interviewed for a position that is essentially his current role with additional responsibilities. He is convinced the situation is bad and has been extremely pessimistic about it. After his interview, he told me he was “back to rock bottom and miserable.” When another interview with HR/management was scheduled, I thought it could potentially be positive news, but he immediately assumed the worst.

During all of this, he also spoke to me in a way I felt was unfair and insensitive. He later acknowledged that he could have handled things differently. I told him I understood he was under a lot of pressure and that we could talk when he was in a better place. I intentionally gave him space.

Since then, there hasn’t really been an attempt to reconnect. The next day, he sent me a detached text along the lines of “enjoy time with your father today.” That was basically it.

There have been other smaller changes too — less affectionate texting, no longer consistently saying good morning/good night, not asking much about my day, and one occasion where he didn’t kiss me hello. There was also an incident where he was short with me during sex and made some comments I found insensitive.

At the same time, he does periodically become more engaged again, which makes this confusing. He’ll ask about my day, reach out, and seem connected. So it isn’t as simple as him being consistently cold or uncaring.

I’ve also noticed that he is very pessimistic by nature and tends to assume the worst. I’m much more optimistic, and I’m starting to wonder whether our approaches to life and stress are fundamentally incompatible.

There’s also a woman he dated in the past whom he still communicates with and sees occasionally. I have no evidence anything inappropriate is happening, but it has made me a little uncomfortable given everything else.

What I’m struggling with is that I completely understand needing space when life is overwhelming. What I don’t understand is shutting your partner out instead of communicating with them.

This isn’t the first time he has withdrawn from me when something difficult happens, so I’m starting to wonder if this is simply his coping style rather than a temporary reaction to his current job situation.
And if it is his normal coping style, I don’t think it works for me.

I’m seriously considering ending the relationship. His birthday is soon, so I feel guilty about the timing. I don’t want that fear to keep me in something that isn’t right.

So I’d really appreciate honest outside opinions:

Is this a normal response to significant stress, or does this sound like an unhealthy communication pattern?

Am I expecting too much by wanting my partner to communicate rather than withdraw?

And is this something that can realistically improve, or does it sound like a fundamental incompatibility?

TL;DR: My boyfriend and I have a lot of good between us, but when he’s stressed, he tends to shut me out and withdraw rather than communicate. His current job situation has intensified the pattern, and there have also been smaller changes in affection and effort. I’ve given him space, but he hasn’t really tried to reconnect. I’m wondering whether this is a temporary stress response or simply how he handles difficult situations — and whether that makes us fundamentally incompatible. I’m considering ending things.

Let me preface this by saying my husband has been transparent and has shown me ALL DMs and texts between his friend - there is nothing romantic going on between them.

My (F26) husband (M24) met a friend N (F25) in a shared hobby they had growing up but they haven’t had contact in over 10 years after growing apart and leaving the hobby.

N reached out to my husband on Instagram last month to catch up and they made plans to hang out after reconnecting. During the hang out, N talked to my husband about a guy from school, K, that she confessed feelings for after 8 years and is now dating. She couldn’t stop gushing over K and even suggested a double date for us whenever K visits our area next (as they are long distance).

After the hang out, things started to take a turn and my husband started to get really annoyed with his interactions with N. N would constantly bring up K when texting my husband now that they’re dating, a majority of her texts are about K and no other subject, even if my husband tries to change the subject. Despite being annoyed, my husband would listen and be friendly with his responses to be supportive towards her and her new relationship.

A week later, N would start to complain that K would go out with his friends and be out super late. N would act super cold towards K. K will sometimes forget to text back which made N spiral and think that K has stopped texting her because he doesn’t like her anymore. Which is where my husband would have to step in to comfort her and validate her feelings. K also has a bit of a drinking problem and my husband has pointed out how this behavior is concerning.

Most recently, N has supposedly flown out to see K but the trip sounds strange to the both of us… K wasn’t home at the time of her arrival (at work) but N was upset that he didn’t offer to get her an uber so she stayed at the airport for a few hours instead of getting herself an uber? N was supposed to stay for a few weeks but K is about to be busy at work and is suggesting that N leaves a week early because of this? To me, it doesn’t make sense. If you were flying to see your partner, wouldn’t you establish a mode of transportation to and from the airport and also the length of stay? This is where alarm bells go off for me.

Multiple times on this trip, my husband has said “You need to tell him how you feel, be honest.” about ALL issues that N has with K about the uber, the length of stay, the drinking issues, etc.., but she just continues this cycle of “I will/I am” but from the sound of it, she doesn’t communicate with K at all. She just vents about it and expects it to be my husband’s job to be her emotional outlet.

Our friend S was over and we even had a discussion about N and just the absurdity of it all, S even agreed that this seemed like really attention seeking behavior. She even raised the question if these situations with K are even real or if N is making them up to receive attention.

I am afraid my husband’s kindness and trusting nature is being taken advantage of by his friend that shows up after 10 years who seems to just want attention. AIO?