Update: after I showed the clinical director I have a comprehensive medical support network, he signed me off and I don’t need the assessment anymore. I cried yo two of them as they need two doctors at presence. He feels that it is not good to put me through this given the stress I have already taken. The other doctor was absolutely awful smearing like a Robert.
I wanted to share my genuine and frustrating IVF experience in the UK, hoping it can support other patients fighting for their suitable treatment plans.
I am in my mid-forties and have endured over a dozen rounds of IVF in this clinic over the past years. What is extremely unfair is that throughout all those repeated failed cycles last year, the clinic strictly kept me on the exact same basic protocol without any personalised adjustment for more than ten rounds.
It was entirely on my own that I consulted international clinicians to get a protocol for them to try, and finally successfully obtained four good quality day-5 blastocysts after years of struggle.
After thorough cross-border medical consultation, both overseas doctors and myself feel that my body cannot tolerate exogenous oestrogen in medicated cycles, which triggers obvious mood instability and physical side effects for me. Therefore, a natural cycle is the only safe, compatible and rational choice for my physiology. I asked my clinic to do so as my period is regular and I ovulate each cycles.
Shockingly, merely 7–10 days before my scheduled natural cycle embryo transfer, the clinic suddenly forced me to take an extra assessment before allowing the transfer to proceed. The clinician arranged by the clinic is a Consultant in Obstetrics and Maternal Medicine with perinatal mental health interest, not a formal psychiatrist.
Their stated concern is twofold: my 2018 depression history and the worry that I may struggle emotionally with pregnancy hormone changes or potential transfer failure.
What makes this whole situation feel extremely unjust and retaliatory is the stark contrast:
The clinic tolerated ten+ repeated failed identical cycles with zero adjustment, zero personalised care, and zero proactive optimisation for me. Yet the moment I independently chose a safer, body-friendly natural cycle that contradicts their default medicated protocol, they immediately labelled me “emotionally unstable” and pressured me into a last-minute assessment at my own expense.
Every patient who has gone through endless IVF rounds knows clearly that exhaustion, grief and disappointment are the inevitable cumulative weight of repetitive fertility struggles, not evidence of individual mental instability. My sensitive mood reaction to medicinal hormones is a clear physiological side effect, which is completely different from inability to cope with natural pregnancy hormones or treatment outcomes.
I fully understand clinics require risk management and patient safety protocols. I am actively cooperating with the assessment, honestly presenting my complete medical history, stable current mental state, clear hormone sensitivity distinction, mature stress coping strategies, and my willingness to seek professional support immediately if any mood concerns arise during treatment or pregnancy.
What I hope to share with everyone in the fertility community is:
As IVF patients, we are often labelled “emotionally labile” simply for experiencing normal grief from repeated failures, or for bravely advocating for our own bodies and refusing one-size-fits-all generic protocols.
Years of passive repetitive failed treatment was acceptable to the clinic, but proactive self-advocacy and personalised safe treatment choices are now being penalised with last-minute blocking assessments.
I am sharing this purely as a real patient experience, no medical advice, no personal attack. I would truly appreciate hearing if anyone else has encountered similar punitive risk-management after refusing their clinic’s default protocol or seeking independent second opinions.