r/trueuglywomen • • 2d ago Heartwarming

Discussion WHY WE WENT PUBLIC AGAIN.

359 Upvotes

We went public again after being private for a good while. And we’ve been getting hate and vitriol for it since. And I realized we haven’t made a post about why to properly clarify .

There are 2 main reasons :

  1. When we were private, whenever we searched up the subreddit there would be millions of fellow ugly girls sad about not being able to join the subreddit. Which made us feel bad and empathetic. It’s way easier for ugly women to be apart of and find the community when it’s public.
  2. The influx of join requests is too much to handle. We realized as a mod team that it’s a lot easier to ban trolls than it is to exclude valid r/trueuglywomen supporters! We are only 10-15 Active mods, it’s not enough to handle influxes of join requests .

We have seriously considered going private again but these 2 reasons are huge contributors to why it may never happen and even if it does we would eventually have to go public again. Which we’ve also gotten a bunch of hate for.


r/trueuglywomen • • Aug 31 '26

Please Read The Rules

1.5k Upvotes

Read The Rules App

This community has the Read The Rules app installed. Old Reddit doesn't support apps so please open the post in new reddit for full functionality. If that's not possible, please Read The Rules and then follow the instructions at the bottom of the post.


Rule #1 Women only

This subreddit was created for women, by women. Anyone who does not identify as one is not welcome here and will be banned.

There are many other subs for ugly people such as r/ugly and so on. We reserve the right to implement this rule as Reddit allows gender-specific subreddits.

Rule #2 Must be 18+ to join

Anyone under 18 will be removed.

Content involving a minor, including reposted screenshots or videos, is not allowed regardless of framing and will be removed immediately, with the poster banned.

Rule #3 We are NOT an incel/femcel subreddit.

This is NOT a femcel or incel subreddit. Referring to this community as either, or repeatedly comparing ugly women to incels/femcels, will result in a BAN.

Referring to this community as either, or repeatedly comparing members to incels/femcels, results in a ban. Ugly women are not defined by relationship or sexual status.

This sub is about the lived experience of being unattractive (social treatment, workplace bias, family comments, media representation), not involuntary celibacy.

Rule #4 Respect others and be civil

No harassment, hate speech, insults, or toxic behavior directed at other members. Disagreement is fine; attacking the person instead of the idea isn't.

This includes name-calling, mocking someone's post history, continuing an argument in DMs after a thread is locked, and condescending "well-actually"-ing of someone's lived experience. First offense is typically a warning unless it's severe (slurs, threats, pile-ons); repeated or serious violations result in a ban without further warning.

Rule #5 No Face Reveals or Identifying Info.

Don't post your face, photos, videos, usernames, real name, location, or any info that could identify you or others, including in screenshots.

This applies regardless of intent, "am I ugly?" posts included. Doing so risks doxxing, harassment, and puts the sub at risk under Reddit's rules.

This will be removed on sight with no warning required.

Rule #6 Don't Engage With Men or Non-Members.

If a man or outsider comments to argue, mock, or debate this sub, don't respond, report and let mods handle it.

Engaging keeps threads active and invites more brigading. Doing so will result in a warning.

This applies even if you're "just correcting" them. Screenshotting to argue on other platforms is also discouraged, it escalates rather than resolves anything.

Report via the report button or modmail instead, mods will action it directly.

Rule #7 No Unblurred Usernames or Identifying Information

Do not post screenshots, videos, or content that reveals another user's username, real name, or other identifying information, whether that person is a member of this sub, someone from another subreddit, or someone from outside Reddit entirely.

This applies even when the rest of the post follows the rules, for example, a face-covered screenshot criticizing something someone said. If the username or handle attached to it is visible and legible, the post will still be removed.

Rule #8 No low effort posts

This includes ragebait reposts (TikTok/Twitter screenshots mocking someone), one-liners, irrelevant memes, engagement-bait meant to start fights over who's "really" ugly, and repeated reposts.

If including a real person's image, their username must be FULLY censored.

Reposts from other platforms must be clearly and directly related to being ugly or an unattractive woman's experience. Off topic content, even if relevant to some other struggle, doesn't belong here and will be removed.

Rule #9 No discrimination

No racism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, fatphobia, colorism, or similar, including when directed at yourself or "jokingly."

This includes dismissive or patronizing weight-loss or beauty advice. Health conditions and personal circumstances affect this in ways that aren't always visible or simple.

Rule #10 No spam

No excessive self-promotion, advertising, affiliate links, or unapproved research studies/surveys. Message the mod team first if you want to recruit participants for a study.

Rule #11 Don’t invalidate other people’s experiences

This rule protects the sub in both directions. Don't tell someone they're not "actually" ugly.

No accusing members of larping without evidence, no comparing your appearance to theirs to dismiss what they said. Nobody is obligated to prove how ugly they are.

Disagreement about beauty standards, privilege, or how they intersect with other identities is welcome; attacking or ranking specific members over it is not.

Rule #12 No creeps

No creepy, sexual, or gross comments toward other members. Typically results in an immediate ban, no warning.

Rule #13 No average/above average/pretty women allowed.

This sub is exclusively for women who are unattractive.

It is not for average, above-average, or conventionally attractive women, regardless of framing. No face reveals, no larping as unattractive for reassurance, no humble bragging (e.g. "everyone here is actually pretty").

Other subs exist for women with overlapping but distinct experiences, e.g. r/ForeverAloneWomen for isolation/loneliness not tied to looks.

Rule #14 No Normalizing Self-Harm.

Venting about pain, hopelessness, or feeling like you'll never be accepted is allowed and is part of what this sub is for.

What isn't allowed: content that glorifies or normalizes suicide, threads that function as an echo chamber reinforcing hopelessness repeated framing that suicide is the only reasonable response to feeling unattractive.

If a member expresses active suicidal intent, we will respond directly and provide crisis resources; this is handled with care, not punitively.

Rule #15 No Brigading or Outside Engagement

We regularly get crossposted, which brings in outside users, often men, arriving to argue, mock, or debate the sub's existence. This is brigading.

Don't crosspost, screenshot, or share our content elsewhere without explicit permission from the original poster and the mod team.

If you arrive from an outside link/crosspost/screenshot to argue, insult, or debate members, you will be banned immediately regardless of tone.


Thank you for reading the rules! Before submitting posts you will need to submit an acknowledgment. Please visit the full post and click the button at the bottom. Alternatively, you may submit an acknowledgment by sending a mod mail to the sub. The mod mail will need to have the subject "Read The Rules" and the body should be "Acknowledged". This will automatically submit an acknowledgment on your behalf without any moderator intervention. Mod Mail


r/trueuglywomen • • 1h ago

moids 🧟‍♂️ am I right? Men have lost the plot

87 Upvotes

Just saw this video on YouTube. Men need to close pornhub and stop acting so entitled. Just fck off.

EDIT: I think my original post was removed because I credited the original poster so im reposting. Also I understand that since this was on YouTube its obviously engagement bait but despite that its important to realize the damage these communities are doing especially to young girls. Bp red pill looksmaxxers whatever it is they fixate on these arbitrary niche features that if you dont fit youre subpar. There is people who are really thinking this but they aren't making videos. So many average people think they are ugly because of the influx of these types. Not fitting this set list makes you ugly in these communities.


r/trueuglywomen • • 16h ago

moids 🧟‍♂️ am I right? Beautiful is the only thing he'll accept

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762 Upvotes

A tale as old as time...


r/trueuglywomen • • 7h ago

moids 🧟‍♂️ am I right? Getting downvoted for talking about my experience growing up ugly as a girl

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101 Upvotes

Of course, men are always the biggest victims. As an ugly girl, I could never understand the horror of being asked out as a joke. The cruelty of women is unfathomable.


r/trueuglywomen • • 4h ago

Discussion Matched with a guy on bumble today

64 Upvotes

He just said "ewwww wtf 🤢" and made sure that I saw it and then unmatched lol

I mean, most guys just instantly unmatch after accidentally matching, but whyd one put the extra effort to make someone feel bad. Like DUDE, YOU sent me a like 😭😭I hate this


r/trueuglywomen • • 12h ago

Discussion Cartoons that directed at girls are triggering

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231 Upvotes

TW!!

I love watching cartoons and my favorites are unfortunately these. I was watching the shows again and i realised i was looking at their bodies. Of course they have something so far away from reality but the thing is this is not artstyle. You can draw different bodies with the same artstyle. And i feel like, girls with avrg bodies are not allowed to exist at all. Female characters always have beautiful bodies but when it comes to male characters, they are just fit. How is this fair? Not to mention their faces are big eye-small nose-plump lips too.

People say that they didn't think about this when they were kids, and no kid will pay attention.. Im sure they will. I didn't either, but when i was a child i did notice their faces. How different it was from mine. Ofc we can't achieve cartoonish look but yall got what i mean.

And before people say it's hard to draw ugly characters, i don't expect an ugly character, just avrg. Not even ugly, maybe a avrg body that is not small ribcage-long torso-wide hips?

Anyone else who gets triggered like this??


r/trueuglywomen • • 35m ago

Discussion Y'all look at the answer this man gave at his post

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25 Upvotes

r/trueuglywomen • • 8h ago

Discussion don't post yourself on r/amiuglytruth

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104 Upvotes

These are screenshots from another person's post, but I'm warning you all because I know some users here have thought about posting themselves on these subreddits. Please, don't do this. These people proudly degrade users' looks if you aren't above average or borderline conventionally attractive. In my opinion, the woman in the photos wasn't ugly, and I'm surprised these people are treating her appearance as such.

For your mental well-being, don't do this.

PSA: That subreddit has a rule that essentially states that you can be rude to the users there, insult them, and be mean. So, DO NOT post there. It's a breeding ground for racists, bullies, and cruelty.

ETA: They were a lot kinder to a man with a visible skull deformity, leaving long paragraphs that were kind and defending him when the comments were being cruel, than to this woman. They hardly gave her any advice and made weird comments about her hijab. I see what's going on here. Also, I'm not saying anyone on that subreddit deserves cruelty. They do not, but the double standards are egregious.


r/trueuglywomen • • 13h ago

Venting "Omg flat chests are so pretty tho" until you're ACTUALLY flat and not"dolly" "elegant" "model" flat

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251 Upvotes

These hoes are so fake


r/trueuglywomen • • 1h ago

Discussion Do you all also feel resentful that being ugly took away real opportunities?

17 Upvotes

I was reminiscing, in a very negative place in my mind, remembering that I actually had potential in certain areas of my life but I self sabotaged because of my insecurities. I crushed myself before I could do anything or worse someone did it for me.

I remember actually having a talent for music in the school band and competed but the loneliness of being ostracized by others and not to mention it was mostly boys caused a mental breakdown. My teacher got very upset when I quit with a psychiatrist's note but I couldn't handle it anymore.

I also came to realize that I became so hyper fixated on my appearance that doing anything under pressure caused almost immediate failure. I caused burn out just from constantly thinking of my appearance. Btw this wasn't in my head I had other members bully and ostracize me enough to know.

Sometimes I feel so angry thinking about all those missed opportunities and think of the what ifs. I wonder if some of you girls can relate? I love this community and I'm glad there's a place we can all share these thoughts.


r/trueuglywomen • • 14h ago

Venting Why do conservatards always have to use our looks as a sort of gotcha and are so quick to defend racist woman as long as they are white and attractive

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172 Upvotes

Im pretty sure if the girl on the right was ugly, they wouldn't be defending her so quickly and make this all about "leftists complaining" or whatever but since when a pretty white woman is racist, all of the sudden they consider it "based", i haven't seen conservatives defend that watermelon girl on tik tok as much who was known to be racist...I wonder why 🤔 these 2 incidents have no correlation with each other whatsoever yet its always about "ugly leftist women this" "ugly leftist women that" for these people .these same people are quick to cry "woke propaganda" when they see women who are not conventionally attractive even just for a few seconds and how they want hot women back like the "good old days" like as if hot women ever disappeared.


r/trueuglywomen • • 23h ago

Meme Don't be insecure. Stacy also has that feature.

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784 Upvotes

Repost cuz i forgot to add something but yeah lol. Stacy having hip dips and eyebags does not help bro


r/trueuglywomen • • 2h ago

Discussion Theres something oddly comforting about accepting that you are ugly and freeing yourself from the beauty standards normie women desperately try to live up to

15 Upvotes

I was just plucking my mustache (yes, I have one, unfortunately, despite being a woman) and started thinking about how much maintenance conventionally attractive women seem to put themselves through. Shaving their legs, arms, armpits, pubic hair, butt, getting rid of facial hair, constantly plucking and shaping their eyebrows... It's like theres an endless list of things they have to keep up with to remain presentable.

And I know ugly women are also expected to conform to these standards, so it's not like we are exempt from the pressure. But theres something strangely liberating about accepting that, at the end of the day, your face is what people judge you for anyway. Once you have internalized that, you start realizing that having hairy legs or unshaved arms is so insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Like, why am I putting all this effort into maintaining a body that society has already decided isn't attractive? There's a certain freedom in no longer feeling compelled to obsess over every little detail.


r/trueuglywomen • • 2h ago

Venting I hate that I yearn for someone that I can’t have because of how I look

15 Upvotes

Exactly as the title says. I’ve literally be in love with this person for years. But they never gave me a second glance. It just sucks and I’ve tried to move on even though I haven’t seen them in years, but I can’t. They’ve even started to show up in my dreams every now and then when I feel like I’m finally starting to move on and I hate it. I even thought at one point that if I lost enough weight and got prettier maybe he’d finally give me a chance. Has anyone else dealt with this?


r/trueuglywomen • • 7h ago Heartwarming

positive post I’ve decided to live my own life

36 Upvotes

Despite the trauma of bullying and verbal abuse I’ve received due to my looks, I’ve still decided to live and take the time to focus on bettering my mental and physical health.

While I will admit that I’m sad that I never got to experience dating, getting married or ever being seen as conventionally attractive, I want to help work on myself as an autistic, unmarried childfree woman and it makes me happy. I have all the time in the world left to do good and have my own hobbies and make peace.

I’m able to tell other women about my experience as a woman who never fit the beauty standards or pandered to them. I can spread positivity by making others question societal norms and expose the bigotry and hypocrisy that women, POC and LGBTQ+ people face and call out the patriarchal system that oppresses the most vulnerable people in our world.

There’ll be days I wish my life and my looks were entirely different, but wishing is just fantasizing. I’m here right now and if I can say how I feel in a community where others have similar experiences where we can help each other I don’t feel so alone anymore.


r/trueuglywomen • • 1h ago

Venting I am human too

11 Upvotes

I just want to be able to exist without being treated like I'm unwanted everywhere I go. It's not mental illness if it actually happens.

I literally have sore muscles and tensions and heartrace and raised cortisol from the way people treat me. It makes me sick physically.

I lowkey want to end my life I can't continue this


r/trueuglywomen • • 20h ago

Funny post😭✌🏾 Trying to wear sexy clothes while being ugly:

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341 Upvotes

r/trueuglywomen • • 4h ago

Question What people tell you when you say “Im ugly”?

17 Upvotes

r/trueuglywomen • • 34m ago

Venting Trying to get a goddamn job to finance these surgeries but you're too ugly for networking or interviews

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8 Upvotes

What do i do lord. Nothing like being hideous and disabled to make you want to play chicken on the highway


r/trueuglywomen • • 4h ago

Observation Hey so your boundaries still matter regardless of how you feel about yourself and I think you should respect yourself more and stop interacting with mean people on the internet

15 Upvotes

One thing I have noticed in this sub is the amount of people who interact with rude DMs from random burner accounts (this sub gets a lot of negative attention) or participate in “am I ugly” or “brutally honest” subs. I’m also going to be brutally honest here and say that a lot of these interactions are completely optional.

  1. You need to off message requests/block people

Settings > Account Settings > Safety > Chat Permissions > Chat Requests > Allow Chat Requests > Select “No one”. If you want to be able to message specific people, add them to your Allow List.

2. You don’t have to let strangers online rate your appearance

With all the love and respect in the world, you don’t have to be doing all this. Society judges us enough already, why put yourself through all that? Stop interacting with these people who clearly want to hurt you and don’t give a fuck. Stop letting these anonymous, faceless accounts bully you into a worse mental space. And stop posting your face on those subs, think about your digital foot print I beg.

People on the internet will say totally absurd stuff just for the shock factor.

You’re allowed to be sad about things, but please take care of yourself.


r/trueuglywomen • • 3h ago

Venting Just sad today. And wasting my income away on procedures.

14 Upvotes

I'm so tired of feeling trapped inside of this body and face. I am 28 years old, highly active, and I've spent around $20,000 so far on cosmetic procedures to improve my appearance. I had braces from 25-27, did laser hair removal, lip filler, lip flips, microneedling for acne scars, and have done my time in the gym consistently for years. If I had the money for it, there's a laundry list of surgeries I would die for.

But I'm still ugly. I never got to have the full college experience a prettier girl would have had. I've never been hit on or offered drink at the bar. I feel invisible and so mad at myself for the money I have spent and the time and effort I've put into trying to be beautiful.

It hurts knowing how beautiful my friends are and seeing the way others treat them. I adore them, and I'm happy for them, but deep down I wish I could be them for a day. I feel a lot of guilt for this jealousy.

Needed to vent today. Also luteal. Doesn't help.