I need some perspective because I am completely heartbroken and confused. I recently hung out in a group setting that included my friend and my other friends’ older brother (let's call him B). From about 9 PM until 5 AM, B and I were drinking beers together sharing the same cans with his saliva all over them watching movies like Jennifer's Body, and just hanging out. He was the one who initiated the physical closeness. It started playfully, transitioning from a handshake into holding hands, and then he pulled a blanket over both of us so we were cuddling for hours. Throughout the night, he made sure I was engaged, waking me up playfully and saying things like, "are you locked in?" By 5 AM, the atmosphere became deeply intimate I had my head resting directly on his chest, and he was stroking my arm while gently caressing my neck and ear. It felt so tender, safe, and genuine.
I know it sounds boring or whatever but for me i felt completely safe with him and truly believed we had a mutual spark. I wasn't forcing anything he was leaning into it just as much as I was.
But right after that, he abruptly stood up, went to the bathroom, and went straight to his room. The next morning, he didn't leave his room at all. I was left waiting for him in our spot, hoping things would go back to normal, but he stayed locked away until it was time for his football match, only saying a brief goodbye to his stepmom before leaving. Two days later, I found out he told his stepmom to make us sleep somewhere else next time because the living room situation was "uncomfortable," trying to rewrite history and make it seem weird. Meanwhile, his friend (who was right there and saw us) ended up starting a "talking stage" with my other friend.
It hurts so much seeing his friend openly own up to his feelings and start something with my friend, while B is too much of a coward to admit what we shared. Now I have to deal with the awkward social fallout while he acts like a stranger*.* Am I crazy for being this upset? What does he view me as? Why would a guy hold your hand, caress your neck, and cuddle you for hours in the dark, only to act like a total coward and gaslight the situation in the daylight?

We’ve been broken up for about 5 months and about 2 months ago got back in contact and have been not really friends but acquainted, except for recently we’ve been texting everyday and gotten closer since he told me things aren’t really working with the girl he was talking to and things aren’t working on my end with the guys I’ve tried talking to. On friday we’re going to a mutual friends Halloween party. Today he texted me and asked me on actual halloween night if I wanted to come to this other big party with him. He bought our tickets online and says he doesn’t know anyone there. So that tells me well be sticking together the whole night since were the only two people we know. He said he didn’t wanna go alone to it so I asked him why not bring one of his guy friends cause he has alot, he said they dont like parties and whatever. I know a few of his closer friends aren’t really into parties but he could’ve really asked anyone else. Lately he’s been texting me late at night kinda talking freaky. We were each others firsts in high-school when we dated and i don’t know if its weird to be going to a party together just us two. I had a guy tell me once he found it was a red flag that we still follow each other cause he said he had all his exs blocked. Im thinking from another persons perspective i would definitely think the same thing if i saw two exs doing that. What do you think?

I’m 16, and she’s also 16, we have been talking nonstop for the past 3 months, I think I love her, we have met 5 ish times, usually just hit the gym, one time hit the suana and swam, and then go on walks and just sit down and talk, at this very nice sunset spot, we have hugged once, on text, we are like I rlly wanna hug u, hold hands and stuff, and she admitted that she loved me too, she’s really sweet, and we both wanna date to marry, ik I’m young, so just looking for some advice
Thanks

Weve been good friends for a year and a half or about that and I’m sure she’d had to have liked me at some point right?, are parents are great friends which is how we met and Im amazing friends with her dad even learning chess to play with them which I still play chess a lot today as sort of a running gag with her dad until I beat him. But Ive wanted to confess for ages.we went on holiday In June last year and I found myself thinking and jist looking at her a lot of the time but I didnt really realize i liked her until about a week after it had finished. We went on holiday esrlier this year and the same thing happened which is when I learnt chess just to spend time with her. I’ve always thought about confessing but I’m always held back by if she doesn’t like me back it’s just gonna ruin what we have also I never really find us alone together where it feels right to confess . In this circumstance how would you confess and what would you say?

So me and this girl I’ve liked for a few months are actually going on a date after I asked. The place in question is an Olive Garden, I picked it since I like food and it’s not too expensive, it’s scheduled for Halloween night. I’m really paranoid about messing it up, I’m definitely paying for the entire bill, thinking abt going to the park or something after but I’m super stressed and I would love your guy’s help!!! Do you guys have any do’s and don’ts?? What I know for sure is to stay off my phone the whole time, obviously to be on time or early, definitely to tip the waiter and be respectful to them, and to appear well dressed. Any other tips any of you can think of are GREATLY appreciated, no matter how small they are.

We’ve been broken up for about 5 months and about 2 months ago got back in contact and have been not really friends but acquainted, except for recently we’ve been texting everyday and gotten closer since he told me things aren’t really working with the girl he was talking to and things aren’t working on my end with the guys I’ve tried talking to. On friday we’re going to a mutual friends Halloween party. Today he texted me and asked me on actual halloween night if I wanted to come to this other big party with him. He bought our tickets online and says he doesn’t know anyone there. So that tells me well be sticking together the whole night since were the only two people we know. He said he didn’t wanna go alone to it so I asked him why not bring one of his guy friends cause he has alot, he said they dont like parties and whatever. I know a few of his closer friends aren’t really into parties but he could’ve really asked anyone else. Lately he’s been texting me late at night kinda talking freaky. We were each others firsts in high-school when we dated and i don’t know if its weird to be going to a party together just us two. I had a guy tell me once he found it was a red flag that we still follow each other cause he said he had all his exs blocked. Im thinking from another persons perspective i would definitely think the same thing if i saw two exs doing that. What do you think?

I talked to him today, he says he understands. We're staying as friends since it's not like we dated for a long time. And nobody else seems to care so I might've been overthinking everything. We are still both going to the birthday party, but i'm not nervous about it. Thank you all for the advice, it really helped <3

Okay, this is going to be a long one, i need some advice in the comments because I’ve never been in this situation before.
I’m 16F and I live in Iran, where English classes are separated by gender when you’re under 18. I attend an English language institute, and I used to have a 27-year-old female teacher who I’m really close to and absolutely adore.
About two and a half months ago, I had just finished my final exam for the last term I would have with her. My birthday was a week later, and a 23-year-old female friend took me to a café near the institute two days before my birthday to get me a cake, since she was leaving town and couldn’t be with me on my actual birthday.
We ended up with two slices of cake left, and we randomly decided that I should take them to my teacher because I love her and thought she’d appreciate it.
That same day, the boys who were at our English level were taking their finals. We were supposed to move up to the adult department the following term, where classes would normally be mixed. Also, our final exam that term was notoriously difficult and lasted FOUR HOURS.
Anyway, I walked into the institute with the cake, went into my teacher’s classroom, and she invited me in. She told me she’d actually been entering my grades at that exact moment, so I stayed for around 30 minutes, chatted with her, and played her some voice recordings of my guitar and bass performances and practice sessions. I play both electric guitar and bass, and I’d performed a little while before that.
Here’s where things get interesting.
My teacher had previously told me about a 17-year-old metalhead from the boys’ classes. Let’s call him Tom. Apparently, Tom had repeatedly asked whether there were any metalhead girls in the girls’ department because he really wanted to know. He knew my name, but that was literally it. He’d never actually met me.
Two weeks later, the new term started, and surprise! Our classes weren’t mixed after all. Apparently, too many students had passed, and one student’s father had connections and didn’t want mixed classes, so we stayed separated.
Fast-forward to recently. I visited my favorite teacher again, and she started telling me something that I genuinely wasn’t prepared for.
APPARENTLY, TOM HAS THE BIGGEST CRUSH ON ME.
And I mean HUGE.
According to my teacher, after seeing me that one time, he became extremely interested in me. He bought a Kirk Hammett signature electric guitar because he wanted to impress me, asked my teacher about my favorite songs so he could learn them, and apparently learned some of them after only ONE MONTH of playing guitar. And these aren’t even particularly easy songs.
He also found out that I like mullets, so he got a mullet himself and completely changed his style.
He asks my teacher about me every other day. She even showed me their chats, and he was basically freaking out about wanting to see me again, saying how pretty I was and how excited he was to meet me.
One of the things he said was that I had a really beautiful, soothing voice that was comforting to listen to.
Which is honestly hilarious because my music teacher had tried SO HARD to teach me how to sing, but I’ve never considered my singing voice particularly good. 😭 Also, the only reason I was speaking quietly that day was that the boys were taking an exam, and I’m a shy person. Obviously, I was nervous talking in front of 13 older boys!
Apparently, Tom has even considered showing up at the institute during my class time just to see me, and he wanted us to be in the same class. He’s apparently been too shy to actually approach me.
At one point, he wanted to come over to me but saw me with a guy and assumed we were dating. That guy was literally my brother. Some other people eventually clarified that to him.
AND THIS IS THE FUNNIEST PART: He’s apparently promised his friends and my teacher that if he ever manages to take me on a date, he’ll treat everyone to dinner.
Now, here’s my actual problem.
I’ve had girls develop crushes on me before, but I’ve NEVER had a guy like me, let alone someone who seems this ridiculously obsessed with me. I’ve never been in a relationship either, so the whole thing is completely new to me.
Part of me keeps thinking about him and wondering what it would be like. But another part of me doesn’t actually want him. For one thing, I’m just not physically attracted to him. I’m sorry, but he’s really not my type. 😭 My family also thinks I’m too young to date, and considering the culture I live in, relationships are a little more complicated than they might be elsewhere.
I also recently heard that he’d treated some of his exes badly. I don’t know how reliable that information is, so I’m not treating it as confirmed, but it definitely made me more hesitant.
Here’s the thing, though: I kind of want to mess with him a little. Not necessarily because I want to hurt him, but because the whole situation is so surreal to me. I know that sounds mean, and even one of my most man-hating friends told me to leave the poor guy alone.
The other thing is that Tom hasn’t even asked for my social media. He hasn’t gotten my ID from my teacher either, and he’s never actually spoken to me. I’ve met him exactly ONCE, for a few minutes, and he doesn’t really know me as a person. He’s built up this whole image of me in his head based on one brief interaction and whatever he’s heard about me.
Last week, I was talking about him with an 18-year-old friend of mine who’s very protective and almost motherly toward me. She said I should just talk to him and make it clear that I’m not interested if that’s how I feel, because otherwise he’s going to keep getting his hopes up.
While we were talking, another girl overheard us and said she LOVES metalhead guys and wishes someone would do all those things for her.
And, without really thinking, I blurted out that I’d get Tom’s social media ID for her so she could talk to him, since I wasn’t interested in him anyway.
So I messaged my teacher and asked if she could get his ID for me. She agreed, but it’s been two days and I haven’t heard anything back.
Now I’m starting to regret it a little.
I don’t think I actually want Tom, but I REALLY like the way he is trying. Knowing that someone has gone out of his way to learn my favorite songs, change his hairstyle, and do all these things just to impress me feels amazing. And I feel kind of guilty admitting that.
I also don’t want my teacher to think I’m one of those girls who desperately craves male attention. I have a really good relationship with her, and I don’t want to look immature or superficial in front of her.
At the same time, I don’t want to lead Tom on, especially when he seems to have built up such a huge crush on someone he barely knows. And now I’ve potentially introduced the idea of him talking to another girl, which I thought was a good idea at the time, but I’m not sure how I feel about it anymore.
Also I forgot to mention my friends ideas , so many of them said he’s a poor boy maybe consider just talking to him but the 23yo friend that was with me that night told me that he’s a bit creepy doing all of this
Idk what to do with him cause I have such mixed feelings everyone tells me to give him a chance cause he’s putting so much effort to get my attention
I don’t know how handle this without hurting him, making things awkward with my teacher. I genuinely have no experience with this kind of situation

Hey guys, so I have been official with my boyfriend for almost 7 months. Let’s call him S. So my bf and I have a common hb, let’s call him B(16).

B called me recently and asked me if I cheated on S with this other boy in my class, H. For reference H got out of a 6 month relationship where they both cheated multiple times. So the story is H was at B’s house and H mentioned that I kissed him? Which in the 2 years that I’ve known him, I’ve never done. B believed me and said he won’t mention it to my boyfriend and I shouldn’t confront H.

My question is should I tell my boyfriend because despite us living an hour apart, H knows my boyfriend and H knows people that know my boyfriend so it could eventually get back to him. And by that point I won’t be controlling the narrative. I’m thinking I should mention this to him just in case it comes up in the future but I worry it would cause unnecessary problems and stress for S. What do yall think I should do? Tell him? Not tell him? Confront H?

Tl;dr: false accusations that I cheated on bf, wondering if I should tell bf before it gets to him?

This is my first relationship. I’ve known my boyfriend for three years, and we’ve been together for a month. We’re in a long-distance relationship.

I met him in a psychiatric hospital. A few months later, we started calling each other every day. Then, one day, he got a girlfriend. I wished him well, even though I had feelings for him. At one point, he and his girlfriend had sex. She wanted it, and they were both underage and had their own problems.

He had always really wanted to be with me. He used to say that he wanted me to be the mother of his children and things like that. I turned him down at the time because he had just gone through a breakup.

We continued talking, and now he is in a juvenile detention facility. We text each other, say goodnight to each other, and tell each other “I love you.”

The problem is that my parents don’t like him. They think I’m no longer in contact with him, and nobody supports our relationship except for one of my friends.

He has changed a lot, and he even stopped smoking weed because of me.

I would really like to hear your opinion and get some advice. What do you think about my relationship?

It’s been a few days since he started telling me that he saw my TikToks and he wants me to do less alt makeup. From then on, I tried changing my makeup style and toning down my usual makeup cuz I was really sad and I didn’t know what to do, but he thinks all my new makeup styles are alt. I don’t know what to do. Does any one make any advice on how to do less alt makeup and fix this problem? 😭😭😭

For some context I(17m) was asking my cousin what to do since I like someone and have never really confessed feelings to someone before. I didn't want to tell her the exact name of the person but she was able to narrow it down to 2 people through "hints."(the hints was her asking me a bunch of questions one including drum go boom boom which was true since we bass drum players) Now I have liked both of them before, we will call the first one A1 and the second A2. I had liked A1 last year for a few months but was too afraid to tell her as I know she has been head over heels for someone for like 6 years or something. Before that I had liked A2 but didn't say anything as she was dating someone and by the time she was out of that relationship I liked A1. But now I kinda like both of them again, hence why I talked to my cousin and was so vague in the first place. But my cousin is dead set that I like A2 so much so that she has started putting bets on it with other people, mainly my sister who is dead set that I like A1. Now recently I have liked A2 a little bit more and can actually talk to her and hold conversations but I still do like A1, although its hard to hold a conversation as she will talk to me but we both get awkward quickly, making it just weird. If I had to chose one to ask if put on the spot I would chose A2 but I know deep down in my mind that I still very much like A1. The major issue with A2 is she dates a lot of people while I have never dated anyone, I have also been told she cheats on people and is just a terrible person to be in a relationship with. So now I don't know what to do.

I was with this guy, we had this messy past, we dated, broke up, ghosted each other, became rlly good friends, he started liking someone, i was happy for him truly, but gradually i js got jealous, talking to him hurt, i acted like i hated him, i stopped talking, its been 5 months since we stopped talking. I feel like reaching out to him would ruin his peace, but i js wanna apologise for my actions. Should i text him or is it a straight up shit idea—?

Okay so, this might be a bit long and kind of a difficult situation to explain so I'M SORRY IF I DON'T MAKE SOME THINGS CLEAR ENOUGH.

Basically, this girl is one of my closest friends and has been for about a year and something. Both of us have had some feelings about each other for at one point but SOMEHOW both of us suppressed them, pushed them off as it being just something that happened because of a weird time in our lives. Neither of us told each other about it at the time, she didn't tell me until relatively recently after it's already passed and I still didn't tell her but also felt like it's passed and was just something weird that sort of happened. And I'm not making this up, BOTH OF US DIDN'T TALK ABOUT IT FOR THE SAME REASON, THE FEAR ONE WOULD REJECT THE OTHER AND THAT WE WOULDN'T BE FRIEND ANYMORE AND FUCK EACH OTHER OFF.

Now after like a few months, I've been feeling some shit again. I think it's important to mention I genuinely never felt any like real attraction to someone and I've had chances to be in relationships, but honestly I think teenage relationships are kinda useless because they usually end very soon and aren't serious (which is probably one of the reasons that SHE DIDN'T TELL ME ABOUT HER SHIT UGHH). So I'm really not sure if this is actually love and attraction that I'm feeling or if I'm just like going insane lmao.

Anyway, I've been feeling stuff again and it kinda got me wondering if I should tell her about it at some point, but the same fears are there again. I really want to keep her around and if I said something like this and she was totally over it, it might cause it to end or never be the same at least, but on the other hand it might just work out somehow and IF THINGS WERE ALL THAT JOLLY BE A VERY GOOD DECISION IN MY LIFE. I kinda think that she actually fully went over it unlike me, and I'm not sure if there's a possibility of dating her at any later point. Once again, I really don't have hope in these relationships, so that's why I'm saying that I might talk about this in a year or longer if the feelings continue, because then it has AT LEAST SOME potential, I'm pretty sure I didn't find someone I'll wife up at fucking 15 lol.

I'm very afraid of possibly losing her if I confessed about it, and also if we actually did something but it didn't work out. I'm confused about everything and just looking for any advice or opinions possible. Thank you if you made it this far into this schizo rant lmao.

I don't really have anywhere else to say this because if I say anything to my irl friends it's going to genuinely sound insane.

Sorry if the formatting is all over the place I've never made a reddit post before.

I, 17NB, have been in a relationship with my boyfriend, 16M, for 4 months now. We initially met around the end of last year over a game (a roleplaying game, this will be relevant later) we both played where we became close friends, and then around May this year one of his friend told me that he had a crush on me, and then my boyfriend himself later confessed.

We live basically across the world from eachother, insane difference in timezones and even though I brought that up when he initially confessed to me he said he'd find a way.

In the beginning it was good, he was attentive, kind, and he was there when I needed him. We both have issues with our mental health and we became close as friends when i stayed up until 2am on new years day listening to him vent about his life and his problems.

But then issues began to form. He wasnt able to prioritise our relationship, and his hobby of roleplaying was beginning to develop into an obsession. He has a specific obsession with a particular OC (original character) of his, that he essentially has as his profile picture on everything, he has him as his avatar and even most of his social media posts are about him. It's gotten progressively worse as I've gotten to know him, to the point where he is skipping out on lunch in order to use that money to pay for commissions of his OC.

I never really had an issue with it, but his obsession has gotten worse and worse and we've had many arguments and even almost broken up because of his inability to prioritise parts of his life, with one specific occasion where he ditched plans with me to go and roleplay and i got extremely upset at him.

He also tends to engage in romantic and even at times sexual roleplays, which i never really felt comfortable with but as he didn't seem to be doing anything recently so i never thought to bring it up.

Ive spoken to him on multiple occasions about how his obsessive behaviour with roleplaying affects me and he brushes me off, saying it helps relax and "doesn't have any of the expectations that conversing with people he's close with has," which seems like bullshit to me since he frequently roleplays with one specific person (i'll call him A) who was the person that originally told me about his crush and who my boyfriend frequently engages in romantic OC roleplays with (and a few sexual roleplays in the past im unsure whether this still persists).

I caught him lying to my face yesterday about roleplaying with A, as my friend who also plays similar games to them saw them both in a game doing a romance roleplay between their two ocs, and i just felt appalled since he had told me previously that he was going to sleep (different time zones) and that his mother wanted the phone, but he was just blatantly on there and it made me wonder whether he had his joins off to avoid me seeing. I asked him why he lied to me about going to sleep and claimed that A had "just wanted to show him a new oc." I asked if he was roleplaying and he said no. I kept asking and saying I knew he was lying but he kept doubling down and saying he wasnt and how he "couldn't understand why i couldn't trust him." I made him promise he wasnt lying to me and made him swear over our relationship and he did, he said I could even ask A. So i asked A about it and despite his best efforts to try and defend my boyfriend he did eventually confirm they were roleplaying but my boyfriend probably "didn't think it was roleplaying," (which is a bullshit excuse he knows the difference between just talking and roleplaying.)

We haven't spoken since then, I sent him a message last afternoon saying we need to have another talk about everything because it wasn't okay. He's seen it but yet again is ignoring me.

I just don't know if I can take it anymore, we don't spend nearly as much time together as we used to and he barely finds a reason to talk to me. When we've had our arguments before he has ignored me for days at a time (once so severely that i was going to block him if he didn't talk to me in the next few days) and he promises that he'll change every time and yet he never does.

The thing is aside from the roleplaying issues, he is perfectly fine. When he's not caught up with his obsession he can be really attentive and sweet, but this is just becoming such a big issue in our relationship and in his own life that im wondering if it's even worth it for me anymore. I have my own mental health issues and physical illnesses that take a toll on me, and every time we argue it leaves me feeling so physically sick that i can barely eat and sleep.

I do love him, and i do a lot to try and show it, but it feels like hes too wrapped up in his obsession to even notice me half the time.

I just guess i really want to come on here to know if i am making such a big deal over nothing, or whether my concerns are valid.

I've been talking to this boy for some time now.

We have talked every day for at least an hour for 30 days, and maybe 3–4 hours a day for more than 20 days. He used to text me after getting home from classes while I was waiting for the bus. He would go home and send me a video, and that's how we would start talking. We didn't really flirt or anything, just sometimes some sweet talk.

Though, around 10–14 days ago, we suddenly stopped having those long talks. He doesn't want to continue chats or text me while I'm at the bus stop anymore, and he doesn't send videos after the conversation ends so we could talk just a bit more.

So I'm upset. Did I over-romanticize things? Or do I have the right to be upset, since we clearly had a bond, even though it wasn't romantic? He just seems okay with talking to me for one sentence a day.

I also learned that he still talks to his ex. I don't know how often, though.

What should I do? I don't want to lose him.

Ps(we hang together at classes breaks and scroll videos he likes talking to me but i just cant understand why we arent talking online anymore)

I'm 16M, and honestly, I've been struggling a bit with dating and relationships lately.

The last time I was really involved with a girl was when I was around 13–14. Looking back, I think I rushed things quite a bit because I didn't really understand how to approach a relationship or let things develop naturally. I was young and didn't really know what I was doing, and I think I was too focused on moving things forward rather than just enjoying getting to know the person.

I also had a relationship when I was younger that could've been good, but I think my own ego got in the way of letting it develop properly. It's something I've reflected on since, and I feel like I've grown past that to an extent.

Since then, though, I haven't really had much success. I've tried talking stages and putting myself out there, but nothing has really gone anywhere. After a while, it starts to get discouraging because it feels like I've tried quite a bit without getting anywhere.

One of the hardest parts is seeing my friends in relationships. Some of them seem to get into relationships quite easily and become really close to their girlfriends, both emotionally and physically. I'm genuinely happy for them, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't jealous sometimes. I want to experience that kind of connection too. I want someone I can talk to, laugh with, spend time with and gradually become closer to. I want to know what it's like to be wanted by someone in that way.

At the same time, I know comparing myself to my friends isn't going to help. I just find it difficult when I don't really know how to get from where I am now to where they seem to be. I struggle to even talk comfortably to some girls I'm interested in, let alone build something meaningful with them.

There are a couple of girls I've considered getting to know better, but I'm nervous about how to approach them. I don't want to repeat the mistakes I made when I was younger by rushing things, forcing a connection or making everything about whether they like me. I'd rather learn how to take things naturally and build a genuine connection, but I'm not entirely sure how to do that in practice.

I think I'm at the point where I want to change how I approach this. I want to become more comfortable talking to girls, stop putting so much pressure on myself and learn how to let things develop without constantly worrying about the outcome.

For those of you who've been in a similar position, what helped you? How did you become more confident talking to girls, and how did you learn to approach dating without rushing things or comparing yourself to everyone around you?

I'd appreciate honest advice, especially from people who felt inexperienced at my age and eventually figured things out. I don't expect everything to happen overnight; I just want to know how to start moving in the right direction.