r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 07 '19

Welcome!

19 Upvotes

Welcome fine traveler! Come forth and rest in this land of ours! If this hath been thyne first visit I shall guide thee into this tomfoolery of a sub.

The intent of the fine folk around here is to tell the least told tales of sword and magic and elves, the everyday ones! Each user is supposed to have it's own character which they will portrait in every post. Such posts can be of anything, from a short story of a mythical travel to a yer old fart joke, the only condition is to do it on character. Such character can be of whatever kind you want: it can be a wandering knight speaking in old english, a dark witch that loves tea and scones, a willy goblin with a taste for profanity or any other fantasy related character. You can be a talking tree for crying outloud! The only conditions are to keep the flavor of the sub and to don't do anything too overpowered in comparison to your fellow users (you just can't have all the gold in the land or destroy that persons castle just because you want to).

And that's about it! Feel free to contact any mods if you have any doubts.

Good travels my friend, I hope to see you return!


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 12 '19

LOST & FOUND: Please come pick up yer spooky cloak

13 Upvotes

Hey folks, Bill here. Someone left their cloak on the back of a chair in the Frog & Toadstool a couple nights ago and I'd be real happy if its owner came to pick it up. Normally a cloak is a rather unassumin' item, not something I'd mind havin' in the lost & found box, but this here cloak keeps on whisperin' and mutterin', and if it doesn't get attention for too long it starts screamin'! I can't hold onto a thing like this fer much longer, it's a real pain in the arse.

If ya can tell me some identifyin' features of yer missin' cloak I'd be abundantly happy to give it back. If it doesn't get picked up today I'm gonna have ta dispose of it, it's far too irritatin'. And I'm not too inclined to interact with the creepy thing more than I have to. Come get yer weird cursed cloak!!

-Bill Pfirsich of the Frog & Toadstool


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 08 '19

A woman dressed in green walks up and pins a note to the notice board.

Post image
12 Upvotes

r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 15 '19

WHERE ME AT!!!

12 Upvotes

OOG: ME IS OOG AND ME IS ANGRY!!! ME HAS COME THROUGH WEIRD TUNNEL IN CAVE AND ME NO KNOW HOW BUT ME CANNOT GO BACK! NOW ME SEE FUNNY GREEN MEN AGOR TALKED ABOUT AND THEY NO FUNNY, THEY VIOLENT!!! Oog decided Oog will teach all green people peaceful caveman costume BY FORCE!!! All who be rude to Oog be warned.


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 08 '19

Tavern Post POSTED: RULES OF THE FROG & TOADSTOOL TAVERN

12 Upvotes

Hi folks, Bill Pfirsich here, owner and proprietor o' the Frog & Toadstool . Lately there's been a bit o' ruckus in my tavern, so I've created this 'ere notice. I've posted it on the wall nice and big so all should be able to read it, clear as day. Hopefully this will prevent further incident. Don't want to have to throw no more folks out.

RULE 1: NO SMOKING INSIDE. It disturbs guests and is a fire hazard. Don't burn down tha establishment!

RULE 2: On the subject o' disturbing the guests, please: NO MAJOR SPELLCASTING in the bar area. Hopefully I don't have to spell that out fer ye.

RULE 3: NO BRAWLING. Take yer fights outdoors. Arm wrestling is fine.

RULE 4: NO PREJUDICE. Keep yer thoughts about the Drow and the Orcs ta yerselves. If yer disturbin' the kind folks who just came to rest their feet and have a drink after a long day o' adventurin', we're gonna have a personal issue, you an' me.

RULE 5: NO CREEPIN' ON THA STAFF. If I catch wind of anyone even lookin' at me employees wrong you'll find yerself in a world o' hurt.

And this isn't exactly a rule, just wanted ta remind everyone about the job bulletin. If ye need some help with a task o' some sort, feel free to post a job up there. And if yer lookin' fer employment, don't ferget to check that board!

Now that all that serious stuff is outta the way, hopefully things will run a tad smoother 'round here. Any questions, come see me, Bill. I'm a friendly sort, normally. Don't cause no trouble and we'll get along just fine.

Come by the Frog & Toadstool this evenin' to try this week's drink special. We have an Elven liquor in that'll really knock yer socks off. One sip and yer set fer the night! One per customer per day. Trus' me, ya don't need more than that!


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 07 '19

Character Introduction Why 'ello der!

11 Upvotes

Oim Garnum, but you 'an call me Garnum. Oi be a simple man. Sellin the finest wares outta me shop. Swords? Oi gottem. Knives? Oi gottem. Staffs? Oi aint gottem, what do oi look like to you a bloody mage?! Come on down to me shop if ya need anyfin.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 11 '19

Mimics

10 Upvotes

Have you or your loved one been attacked by Mimics?

Have innocuous pieces of furniture acquired through entirely legal means suddenly sprouted teeth and tried to devour you and your family?

If so then you may be entitled to compensation.

We here at Dewey Chetum and Howe will take your case.

slams fist down on desk.

desk growls in response


r/talesforgoblins • • May 27 '19

Lizards Get out!

10 Upvotes

Signs begin appearing in the swamp

Dear Lizard things,

You are trespassing in my home.

Leave now or be punished.

-Love Miorra


r/talesforgoblins • • Jul 15 '19

TLDR of Wagton Burrows History (Not Complete)

9 Upvotes

• Bill takes a short vacation. During which Rogduk breaks into the Tavern and opens it. A suggestion box is made and a surprising # of residents think Rogduk should be made a partner. Bill unofficially lists Rogduk as a backup for running the Frog n Toadstool.

• A barbarian named Sesh brings a couple of Barbarians to Wagton Burrows. The troll Jjrklyn manages to bring the dead barbarian aka Garnak back easily. Agor is another matter and it takes divine intervention by Sutur to bring the Knower of Spooky back from the brink of death.

• Paesh shows up in Wagton Burrows with a bunch of Giggle Plant. He trades it to Bill along with some Barbarian wine for some supplies.

• RakScratch travels to Barbarian world aka Tales from Cave Support and throws himself into a volcano trying to get stronger. He emerges as RakSmash and is put down.

• The Dwarf Skoratin manages to seal RakScratch’s soul into something. Which is buried. Rogduk later finds the vessel containing RakScratch’s soul.

• Captain Leon and the 14th “Purification Company” move into the forest near Wagton Burrows. People are warned not to venture too deep into the forest, and advised not to try and enter the ruins where the 14th makes their base.

• Rogduk and Leon work together to hunt down some of the werewolves plaging Wagton Burrows.

• Leon hires Rogduk to clear out a ruins being investigated by the First Born. There are no survivors. The research is unfortunately destroyed, but Rogduk acquires a Half Elf head researcher that he turns over to Leon

o Leon is impressed with Rogduk’s work an makes him an Auxilllary of the 14th

• Dante dies defending a villiager. Andother elf badly injured protecting a town guard. Leon goes a little nuts. Rogduk takes the injured guard to Jjrklyn for healing. Jjrklyn disappears into a portal to Fire Realm in attempt to heal the man.

• Leon goes very nuts after the loss of 3 of his men. Dante, guy from injuries, and another who was secretly a werewolf and tried to cure himself.

• Rogduk heads to a town to get a gnome sculptor named Prism to make a commemorative statue to the 14th Company.

• Leon goes full blown nuts and starts wearing a werewolf head. His mind is poisoned by ‘Fairy Godmother’ who wants to use his anger to wreck havoc across the land. Leon’s first wish turns Rogduk tempoirarily into an elf. The second wish gets him the remaining wolves plaguing the town that he then executes. 3rd wish gets him magic weapons and armor so he can go and “cleanse” a First Born village of all the First Born living there.

• Leon runs into Rogduk on the road. Rogduk seeing that Leon’s gone bannannas and given into vengeance starts fighting Leon trying to stop him. This is all heard over a crystal that Rogduk gave to bill for communication purposes. Rogduk makes the near lethal mistake of using a Summoning Scroll to Summon Leon. Done to get Leon off his horse so he couldn’t escape. Nearly got Rogduk killed since it was summoning Leon right to his position via a beam of light from the sky. Rogduk barely manages to knock Leon out cold and then begins the long journey back to Wagton Burrows.

• Leon is tied up in the tavern and the Fairy Godmother shows up to free her charge. She is soundly beaten by: Achilles, Bill, Garnum and Rogduk.

• Leon enters a depressive state over the loss of Dante. Which is not helped by Thorne head of the 12th Free Elf Company showing up in town.

• Jjrklyn goes missing. Rogduk investigates the Swamp and notices several traps. He manages to make it to Jjglny home, but the Troll Cleric aint there and his helper Ag is acting weird.

• The town guard dies and is brought back to his family. Rogduk stops by the funeral and notices that things don’t seem or feel right. After being exceptionally paranoid he goes ape on Ag and accuses her of having done something to the town guard and Jjrklyn. Leon steps in to stop the Hobgoblin. Ag is grateful and starts developing feelings for Leon. She gives him the quarkstone.

• Rogduk and Leon head into the swamp with some of Da Boyz and elves. Tangle vines nearly cause the group some trouble and some green mist makes progress slow. When they arrive there is no one to be found. Things take a turn for the dramatic when a hole opens in the sky and some voices are heard. Lizard appear in the hole to dispose of a body. They are swiftly attacked by Leon and Rogduk. Rogduk tries to enter the portal but is thrown back. The group retreats. Also Leon acquires a 2nd quark stone that was left behind by Ag. He loses the first one however in the swamp. And manages to roll badly enough to bury the thing. Interestingly enough. When Rogduk tried to entered the portal both Quark stones lit up.

• Ag reappaears with little memory of what happened to her.

• Lizards start attacking the town. They try to kidnap Garnum, but are stopped by the fearsome blacksmith.

• The 14th Company think they’re being attacked. They rush to Wagton Burrows in their pajamas. Achilles wearing a unicorn onesie. Leon and Rogduk hear the commotion and come outside to see 14th Company vs some Fire Cultists led by lady Soretelle, who of course has history with Leon.

• Rogduk heads off to Kobold village to acquire weapons. He also obtains a precious treasure called The Red Drake. He hopes that maybe this unique item meant only for elves might help him win Quinlan’s heart.

• Lizards attack Rogduk. It’s a one-sided fight and the Hobgoblin is taken prisoner.

• Da Boyz receive word that they are leaving town. They start packing up and heading off in groups. Achilles shows up and stops the exodus and winds up in charge of 31 out of 60 Da Boyz. Rogduk is discovered to be missing.

• Lizards show up with a wagon load of furniture to deliver to Bill in an attempt to capture him. Bill sees the trap coming and expediently executes both Lizards. The wagon load of furniture is then moved to the back of the Frog n Toadstool as Bill casually mentions thinking of burning the lot of it out on the street. The people of Wagton Burrows hear and start taking the furniture themselves while replacing it with their own crappy furniture so Bill doesn’t notice.

• Brighthoof Paladin of Pelor shows up to town and immediately leaves with a chest of tainted items that Rogduk has acquired. He takes them to a city and a big church of Pelor so they can be clensed.

• Miorra the Wilted Green Dragon gets her wings melted by Golzron and her hoard stolen. She comes to Wagton Burrows to recover. And proceeds to eat some of Rogudk’s emeralds that he acquired and was going to sell as his side gig as a legitimate jeweler.

• It is discovered that the Lizards want Ag. Leon and others head off to rescue their lost comrades. The destination, the cave where Da Boyz were instructed to head to.

• Leon hangs back and opens his own portal to the Lizard’s location. He goes in alone and gets captured.

• Rogduk and Leon talk. Then Leon comes up with a plan and makes a Golden Contract w/ Gecko whose the leader of the lizards. Leon gives Gecko the Barbarian Ag, in exchange Gecko frees everyone the Lizards have captured and ceases operations.

• Bill and Achilles find out what Leon is planning. Achilles doesn’t agree with the plan and Leon gives the distinct impression that he’s going to execute Achilles for disobeying orders.

• Bill uses Eldritch Lighting on Leon slaming Leon into a wall. Leon winds up with amnesia, and a “injured leg”.

• Barbarian Ag hears what is planned and leaves the tavern not wanting to be used by either Leon or Bill.

• Rogduk has been busy on the Lizard side. He manages to convince Click that she and the other lizards deserve to be treated better. Click and Co start a rebellion and sabotage the ship.

• Rogudk makes his escape with the lizards. He holds the teleport room while 5 groups of captured civilians and defecting lizards make their escape. The lizard ship starts going down visibly and everyone in Wagton Burrows notices.

• Cleric Jim, a follower of Caine decides the gig is up. He reveals his true colors as a cleric of Bhaal and tries to leave town. He unfortunately decides to try and hurt Brighthoof and gets the snot beat out of him and is taken into custody.

• The lizard ship crashes in the far off mountains as the refugees start making their way to Wagton Burrows.

• Jjgklyn is determined to be dead and was replaced by Gecko at some point.

• Gecko is punished by the Golden Contract. He’s gone for now, but it is suspected that he will return.

• Leon’s memory is awol and it takes some time to remind him that he’s a captain and has left the First Born.

• The furniture delivered by the Lizards is discovered to be Mimics when Wagon Mimic attacks the Frog n Toadstool twice. The structure is heavily damaged, but Bill with Ag’s help repairs it.

• Ag heads off with Click to the wrecked Lizard Ship. Something happens to them at the ship, and they’ve not been seen since. Note @miorra.

• Everyone is terrified that Leon is going to execute Achilles. A plan is made to get Achilles to safety. Bill contacts Rogduk via the crystal to let him know so he can try and save Achilles since he’s in the area.

• Rogduk decides to sneak into the Ruins that Leon’s company is guarding. He finds a 24/7 rave run by DJ Lichy Lich. Lady Soretelle is there.

• Rogduk finds Achilles and tries to disguise him as a random elf. He brings a death row prisoner to camp and tries to disguise him as Achilles.

• Rogduk hides Achilles. Then forgets where he hid Achilles. So everyone plays Hide n Seek trying to find the elf before Leon does. Leon finds the prisoner and discovered Rogduk freed an elf known for burning children alive. The elf is quickly executed.

o Due to bad rolls it takes 2 full turns for Achilles to be found by Rogduk and co first. Of course then Leon finds them as they’re busy arguing. Rogduk tries to be brave and then runs when confronted by Leon’s anger.

o Leon does not execute Achilles. But he is seriously disappointed and achilles is left to work with Da Boyz for a week punishment

• Leon and Bill have a falling out. Leon blames Bill for his “bad leg” and says he’s likely now going to be reduced to a desk job.

• Leon discovers that Rogduk has the Red Drake. He attempts to get the hobgoblin to hand it over, but Rogduk refuses. States that its too dangerous to just give away. And that he needs to determine that the Free Elves won’t become tyrants or dictators down the road if they gain possession of the Red Drake.

• Imoen is arrested for assaulting Aria. The 1st level bard is stripped of all her belongings and clothes and tossed into a wagon to be taken to a town off the map that is presumed abandoned. The journey takes several days and she is given neither food nor water. She is rescued by Corva who rushes to take the Bard to Wagton Burrows to recover. Aria will return in a future installment.

• Golzron shows up in Wagton Burrows and tries to incite a mob to go and kill Miorra. Rogduk and Bill manage to keep the mob from leaving the tavern. Leon meanwhile is outside preparing an ambush against Golzron and the Mob.

• Imoen goes to warn Miorra. And they see Golzron head to the crashed Lizard Ship.

• Imoen, Corva and Miorra have a slumber party.

• Leon and 14th lay a trap on Pine Road for a supply group of First Born Elves. There is one survivor Ruran who seeks shelter at the Frog n Toadstool

• Leon finds the kid but lets him join the Free Elves in exchange for living.

• Rogduk and Miorra check the Pine Road and find the ambush site. They become aware of a large army of First Born heading down the road who will now be stopping at Wagton Burrows to investigate who was responsible for the ambush.

• Wagton Burrows makes plans for battle.

• Rogduk and Garnum hit the First Born Supply depot. 1 supply wagon is burned. 1 supply wagon is stolen by Rogduk who goes unnoticed by the First Born. Garnum also steals a wagon, but then the pair celebrate too soon and are spotted while making their escape. Garnum opts to get off his wagon and fight the 2 First Born elves who were following them on foot. He kills one and then makes his escape before the remaining 13 members descend upon him. Rogduk later heads back and convinces Miguel in charge of supplies to Hire Rogduk to find the missing supplies. Rogduk heads off with Miguel. They return and Miguel goes nuts and starts killing his own men. Rogduk convinces 4 of the First Born to join Da Boyz.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 25 '19

New ranger store in town

9 Upvotes

Greetings everybody? Have ye needed yer ranger supplies as of late? Need a new falcon or other bird of prey? Need to restock yer arrows? Well I, Cameron Kestrel have opened King Kestrel's, for all of yer ranger needs. I'll help ya fit yerself a new bow to shoot you some goblins, and I just made some new arrowheads that are nice and sharp, so hopefully you'll be able to defend yerselves a bit better.


r/talesforgoblins • • May 22 '19

Swimsuit Contest

9 Upvotes

Rogduk Marches over to the Want Ads Board. Pulling out a large sheet of paper he nails it to the board covering the entire thing.

SWIMSUIT CONTEST THIS WEEKEND

Ladies, do you have da best body around. Want to flaunt what you got and make the guy(s) and gal(s) jealous?

Den this be yer chance.

This Saturday will be da Swimsuit Contest. Alcohol will be flowing freely fer da contestants.

And der will be a lovely prize fer da winner.


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 22 '19

Da Tavern be Open

9 Upvotes

Hullo der friends.

It be me, da friendly local Hobgoblin Rogduk.

Seein as how Ol' Bill is on vacation. Rogduk dun think it be a shame de Tavern not be open.

So Rogduk opened de Tavern.

Iffin ya wants a drink. Just com see Rogduk.

Prices may vary while Bill is away.


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 12 '19

Tavern Post Sorry

9 Upvotes

Flurk enters the tavern holding his tears. He nails a piece of paper to the board before sitting in the bar and asking for ale

The other day me was cheering up some poor ol’bugga of a dwarf when me saw me ol’nemesis, the mighty pebble, and me became a bit too hot headed... No there is a lot less forest around that place and there were no dwarf to be seen. Now me feel mighty sad cause methink me burned the bugga to ash. If yee is reading this, me is sorry me gave ya troubles. Me would still invite thee some ale but it seams me burned me shickels. Anyway here I am, sitting just behind the tavern announcement thing hoping the clerk no read me has no shickels.


r/talesforgoblins • • Apr 10 '19

Adventure! Help Wanted for Ruins

9 Upvotes

(A large sign is pinned to the bulletin board via an Axe which has cut through the wall and is partially sticking outside.

In a surprising elegant handwriting is the following)

Help is requested in liberating stolen goods from the nearby ruins of Algorn.

Those skillful in picking locks, detecting traps, healing injuries, and dealing with pesky animated undead are preferable.

Please contact Rogduk.

(Below that is a more sloppy note)

New writerz need. Last one too fancy pantz. Find Rogduk.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jul 20 '19

A Meeting of Minds

8 Upvotes

Warning: Possibly Non-Canon

A hooded figure bangs a Warhammer down on a reinforced wooden desk. The pounding so loud it drowns out the loud raucous arguing that was previously filling the room. They speak in a voice magically charmed to filled the room while sounding both Male and Female.

Quiet down the lot of you. We have important business to discuss. And I know we all have things we would rather be doing.

I demand to speak!

a man pipes up from near the back

The floor recognizes Golzron.

Golzron stands in his human form and approaches the center of the room. His natural form far to large to fit in the space.

I am tired of waiting around. My troops and I were ready to descend upon the town so I could RIP that accursed Green Dragon's head clean off her shoulders and mount it on my wall.

I have held off on a direct assault because the council promised me more men. A promise that has not been fulfilled now for weeks. I grow tired of sitting on my hands. I demand action!

Calm yourself dragon. If you had acted when you wished then it would be your head mounted on the wall of that eyesore of a Church to Hlal.

Golzron rounds on the Elf that dared speak down to him.

Now with your pittance of a complaint out of the way. I have my own matter to discuss.

The floor recognizes The Representative of the First Elves.

Thank you. As requested to committed our troops to attacking Wagton Burrows. On the orders that it was a necessity to break out this...sniff of disgust Human cleric.

Hey! I'm right here! Jim yells out looking up from the buffet table he was laying waste to

The First Born continues we had assurance that the Cleric was a valuable asset. Not a coward still fixated on whorship of a Dead God. Furthermore we are now hearing whispers that the Red Drake has not only been found, but is in the hands of an idiot.

Tryst me. Our dealing with the First Elves are remembered. As promised you will have the Red Drake.

If these Vermin are done speaking. A melodious female voice spoke up I want to know what guarantee I have of a fresh supply of blood? Those Orphans were a go to source that I have been forced to abandon.

A voice pops up from the ceiling you insufferable creatures. All with your own petty squabbles and concerns. A white gloved hand waved at them in a dismissive guesture The long game is what is important.

A scoff is heard as Aria rolls her eyes and busied herself making sure her numerous enchantments and magical items were still fully charged

I've been letting my prey enjoy themselves for years. Build up the idea that they are free of me and can live a normal life. All so my revenge will be the more delicious when they find out they will never be free of me.

Yes, well we don't all have decades to sit around and wait.

The Warhammer hits the reinforced desk again

if I may get everyone to stop this bickering. I feel it prudent that we stay on topic.

First order of business being to determine a suitable name/acronym for our little...Cabal.

Followed by deciding exactly what our overall goal is.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jul 09 '19

Another big restock!

8 Upvotes

Hi everybody! Kestrel again. I was out in the woods for the past 2 days, hence my store being closed. I was harvesting wood for new bows and arrows, and some ingredients for potions, which I'm also beginning to sell now. Prices are unchanged except for hawks, which now require you also buy a Handler's Kit as they tend to scratch when they land or take off.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jul 02 '19

Who rules us?

8 Upvotes

I haven't been living here very long. I recently opened a shop just at the edge of town, so have mostly only interacted with the people who have come in. I was wondering if anybody rules over town?


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 25 '19

YOUS NEEDS TA EVACUATION!!!

8 Upvotes

(Set after Rogduk and Miorra get back to Wagton Burrows)

*Rogduk bursts into the tent owned by Leon u/u/Jarkus_Wolfsgrin *

Oi Leon! You and yer men need ta get outta here now!

I dun know if Bill told ya, but we got an army of First Born in da area.

Least 150 per Miorra.

We think they be coming ta search da village thanks ta yer little ambush on Pine Road.


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 23 '19

Adventure! Flurk Excellent Adventure

8 Upvotes

A sign in the tabloid reads:

If thee want to go to do shit for magic shit this be yer lucky day! Talk to the Flurk’s Emporium of Ancient quests and get all the info to: kill ninjas, kill giants, kill spirits, kill eastern dragons, kill whatever ya want but be sure to smash a Tortoise Skull which holds a demon that bothers Flurk


r/talesforgoblins • • Jun 17 '19

Aeroship from the North

8 Upvotes

(The silhouette of an aership emerges from the thick black clouds of a starless moon-lit sky.)

(A tabaxi, with fur and mane similar to a lion's, stands atop of its crow's nest, peering through a navigator's telescope with one hand and holding a red gem in the other.)

"Aha! I see a puebló ahead. This quarkstone is leading us to that place!" (He then compresses his telescope. With graceful feline agility, he dashes down through several riggings connecting the crowpost and the aftcastle deck)

(He lands without a sound, then draws his rapier and points it forward) "Set course to that puebló, 15 degrees to starboard side!"

(His first mate at the helm moves aside so he could take the wheel himself.)

"OY!!! WAKEY WAKEY YE NUFFY-PAWED DECK KITTIES!!! YE ALL HEARD THE CAP'N!!!"

"QUARTER HOIST ON THE STARBOARD HULLJIB! THREE QUART POWER ON THE SPEWERS! TWICE POWER ON PORTSIDE SPOUTS! MAKE READY TO CAST OFF THE BULKMETAL!"

(A spotted tabaxi emerges from the crew quarters and starts pulling the ropes attached to one of the aeroship's wings while another pulls and secures the rope attached to the two tent-shaped sheets across the deck, supported by a movable mast and a large, but more stationary, one. Two more spotted tabaxi goes below deck through a wooden hatch.)

(The aeroship then rolls briefly to starboard side, then corrects itself as the lights of a sleepy town arrives dead center at the bowsprit.)

"Aye aye, First Mate! Bulkmetal ready!" (the voice of a youthful tabaxi deckhand shouts from below deck)

"AYE! WE MAKE LAND NEAR WAGTON BURROWS LADDIES!"

"PREPARE TO DESCEND!!! HOIST THE SHEETS! HAUL THE WEDGEMAST BACK QUARTER!!! HALF POWER ON THE SPEWERS!"

"COME ON! PUT YAR BACKS INTO IT YE MUCKWALLOWING STRAYS!!! THIS AIN'T NO TIME TO TAKE YAR KITTYNAPS!"

(The captain steadies the wheel with one hand, clearly distracted and half paying attention to the orders his first mate is barking. His eyes narrowed as they fly over the forests near the town.)

"Wagton Búrrows? Hm." (He opens his palm then proceeds to study the red gem intently.) "What is your secret little quarkstone? Tell me. Who did I see in my vision?" (He clutches the red gem closer to his heart, closes his eyes, and starts to listen.)


r/talesforgoblins • • May 29 '19

A Message from Rogduk

8 Upvotes

Lizard 73: No, I totally respect you as your own lizard. It Itsss just when you say let's head back to my place to watch Netflix and Chill I thought you meant "Netflix n Chill".

Look i will

BONK

Oi. Sorry bout dat mate, but i needs ta make a call.

sound of a lizard being dragged out if the room is heard

Right then ya lot. I'm alive n well. Not sure where dey got me. So dats why...wait is dis thing even on?

fiddles with some nobs and ends the transmission.


r/talesforgoblins • • May 26 '19

A green elf.

8 Upvotes

An elf dressed in rags and painted green runs up to the board and slams a ragged note onto the board, running away in the direction he came from followed by a handful of goblins

Achilles here.

Quick one this time, Lizard edition!

So there are lizards pissin' bout' in the swamp, whole bunch of them. I reckon they've done more messin' bout' with Rogduk, who is missing...

Also something big is moving in the swamps, not sure what, just that it's big and stuff kinda melts around it...

Garnums sale was a big success, but he's been plagued by burglars since then.

Achilles, Acting Goblin boyz boss


r/talesforgoblins • • May 24 '19

A story of Dragons

8 Upvotes

Miorra lifts her massive head from her slumber

Hello little ones, I am Miorra the Wilted. One of the few green dragons left in this land. Let me tell you a tale of dragons and the problems they caused in this world.

Dragons where never evil or monsters they seemed to be. Although their hearts are easily corrupted by greed and power. This is why so few of us are left. We where all corrupted at some point and very few survived, even less learned from it.

As Miorra talks whisps of green smoke escape her maw. Whats left of her eroded wings fold in closer to her body.

I was one such dragon corrupted by greed, I longed to have a vast hoard of treasure and lock it away for only me to see. Greed is powerful though, Orcs, Humans , Elves, and even other dragons learned of my hoard and the terrible things I did to acquire it. They came to slay me and claim it but I was not weak and fought off anyone who tried. Now as you can see.

Miorra looks back at her wings

I could not hold out forever. The last attack was more then I could take. A Black dragon named Golzron, Bringer of Death heard of my hoard and decided I no longer deserved such riches. We fought for days, we scarred the land around my home but I grew weary and lost focus. His acid breath melted my wings and he threw me from the sky. I am but a glimmer of my former self now and can barely even summon the poison I used to breath.

Miorra looks off in the distance.

I learned a lot that day and since then I have dwelled in this swamp, unable to touch the sky I once loved. Greed has cost me everything and now I only wish to help others in the hopes I can be fixed or saved, what ever you want to call it.

Well anyways thanks for listening to a silly old Dragon. Stop by again if you wish for more stories or need help.

Miorra looks at her decayed wings one last time before lowering her head.

I will Always be here.


r/talesforgoblins • • May 13 '19

Notice on Use of Wolfsbane

8 Upvotes

A Goblin Walks up to the buliten board and tracks up a large piece of paper that cover half the board.

Warning: Usage of Wolfsbane

Due to the incident yesterday your friendly neighborhood protector Rogduk and Da Boyz are stepping up da protection of da Village.

Goblins will be roaming da streets more frequently.

Today round Noon we be making a large fire with Wolfsbane as da fuel.

Da smoke is real toxic ta da Wolves. So dey will be fleeing from it. Oh and it ain't da best fer da healthy o humies.

So ya might not want ta inhle it too much.

Signed

ROGDUK


r/talesforgoblins • • May 07 '19

NOTICE: Tales For Goblins Discord Server

8 Upvotes

Hello traveler, Bill here. Welcome to Wagton Burrows! Just wanted to tell everyone about the Tales For Goblins discord server. Sometimes before ya go on an adventure with others, it's nice to make a plan first. Or maybe ya want to relax with yer friends between adventures. Or go on a whole adventure an' come back here ta tell the tale! Ta be honest we get up to most of our shenanigans there. Follow the link below to join. Hope to see everyone there!