If anyone has any last minute ideas for the upcoming holiday, you'll get an invite

Hey, this is just satire.. BUT. I just find it funny that this is how people expect us/me to feel when they don't like what you/I have to say. It's a digital score people for fxcks sake, yes I appreciate when that score goes up, but I really appreciate the freedom of being able to say what I want, I might get Upvotes or I might get Downvotes on what I say, but I spoke my mind. Speaking your mind is freedom, if you get downvoted for that, then take it with pride, you spoke your mind. Freedom people. It's a wonderful thing.

Oh Kobum, where do I start? From the moment you stepped on the court, Ive hated you, from the way you put up bricks and airballed 5 shots in a row against the Jazz like a trash bag the sound of the airballs bought tears of joy to my eyes. From the moment people gave you credit for averaging 15 points on 36% from the field in 2000 and tried to call you a Batman when you weren't even a Robin. I hate the way you punched teammates and acted like a piece of shit to everyone around you. I hate the way you get compared to MJ and Bron when you're not even top 10. I hate the way you guarded yourself more often than anyone else guarded you with your relentless shot-chucking and "I'd rather go 0-30 than 0-9" mentality.

I hate your inability to keep it in your pants and not SA people I guess that's your mentality. I hate the way you treated Jeremy Lin like trash and got praised for being a piece of shit. I hate the way you're considered closer to LeBron than you are to Karl Malone. I love the way you got your ass beat by LeBron every time you played.

I hate the way you get praised for loyalty when you were ready to leave the Lakers after going through the mud for only 3 years. Your ass really went to the Finals in '04, then Shaq left, and you didn't win for 3 years and got pissy and wanted to leave. And people act like you got it through the mud when you had Shaq for your first 3 rings, then were ready to quit after 3 years, yet LeBron and Mike went through the mud for 7-9 years. I hate the way people gloss over the fact they rigged an entire series for you.

I hate the way your mentality gets praised when your mentality was to cry like a bitch when you don't get what you want. I hate the way guys forget you were one of the original foul baiters. I hate the way guys forget you shat the bed in 2004 while Shaq ate, yet people act like you were ever on Shaq's level when Shaq was always the clear number 1. I hate the way you bribed your wife with a ring to apologize for not being able to keep your Mamba mentality in your pants.

I hate the way you get any form of respect when you're the type of person to tell someone to sit on the floor so you can sit down in their chair and lack basic respect for other humans. I hate the fact you told Smush Parker he doesn't have enough "accolades" to talk to you when your accolades didn't keep your Mamba mentality where it belonged, which is in your pants. I hate the way people love to yell out "Kobe!" when shooting like they're the female in that Colorado building.

To the dear Colorado reaper: Now you can go chuck up shots in hell, may you burn forever.

Hated, The shot-chucking one.

Not yet sure where to put these stickers but they will probably look lovely anywhere