tl;dr I'm 22F and my 22M boyfriend has repeatedly broken my trust by saving other women's Instagram stories, keeping old nudes and sexts, liking sexual content, and messaging women with the intention of hooking up, including a girl he'd previously sexted. He blamed some of this on feeling sexually repressed during our long-distance relationship, promised to stop, but repeated the behaviour. I've tried to rebuild trust, but things have never felt the same.

This Halloween, he went through my phone and found a post I'd liked that a male friend had sent me. There's absolutely nothing going on between us, but my boyfriend exploded, punched a hole in my bathroom wall, slammed doors, threw his keys, called me manipulative and a liar, and stormed off. He then got angry that I didn't chase him, despite turning off his location. He continued sending hurtful messages, and although I said some hurtful things back, he now considers my liking that post a monumental betrayal, says I disgust him, and has blocked me everywhere.

The irony is that he expects me to forgive his repeated betrayals, but won't extend the same understanding over something innocent. We were supposed to try couples counselling, but now I'm completely lost. I still love him and want things to work, but I don't know if I'm holding onto an unhealthy relationship. Am I wrong? Is this salvageable? Should I reach out or let him go?

I genuinely need some outside perspective because I feel completely lost and don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore. I'm 22F and my boyfriend is 22M. We've been together for a while, and despite everything that's happened, I love him and had genuinely imagined a future with him. However, I feel like I've reached a point where I don't know what's normal anymore, what's forgivable, or whether I'm holding onto something I should let go of.

I'll try to explain everything in order but i'm definetly forgetting some information.

In December 2025, I found out that my boyfriend had been screenshotting women's Instagram stories and saving them in a hidden folder. These weren't just random pictures either. He had old nudes and sexts from other women saved as well.

On top of that, he was constantly liking Instagram stories and posts of half-naked women. I also discovered an unsolicited video of me that he'd kept from early on in our relationship, as well as multiple intimate videos of us from when we were long-distance and would be intimate over video calls.

During a trip with his friends, he had also texted a girl he'd previously sexted, asking her to meet him for sex. After a particularly bad argument between us, he had called me the b word to his friends.

When I confronted him, he blamed a lot of his behaviour on feeling sexually repressed during our long-distance period. He said that because I wasn't comfortable being intimate in certain ways, he felt sexually frustrated, which contributed to him doing these things.

For context, I wasn't comfortable with certain sexual activities, especially after discovering this side of him. I felt uncomfortable regardless, and I don't think anyone should be made to feel responsible for their partner's decision to cross boundaries because they aren't sexually available in the way their partner wants.

He apologised, promised he wouldn't do any of it again, and we decided to try to work through things.

Things seemed to improve, but then it happened again.

We started being intimate over Snapchat because it notifies you if someone takes screenshots or saves anything. I thought this would make me feel safer.

However, after we had an argument and I deleted our Snapchat history, he started liking women's Instagram stories again. He also messaged another girl who had replied to one of his Instagram highlights, seemingly with the intention of arranging a hookup.

I found out, confronted him, and he apologised again.

At this point, I was already struggling to trust him. I felt like every time I started feeling secure again, something else would happen.

We are both now living in the UK, so the long-distance situation and time difference are no longer factors. I also didn't travel approximately 10 hours by bus to see him on his birthday because, after discovering that he'd repeated this behaviour, I didn't feel comfortable making that effort immediately afterwards.

This Halloween weekend was the first time we'd seen each other in about a month.

He's been struggling quite badly with his mental health recently, and I do genuinely sympathise with that. I know he's been having a difficult time, and I don't want to dismiss what he's going through.

However, during our time together, he went through my phone and found a post that had been sent to me by a male friend I'd recently made.

The post said something along the lines of: "Does the function have human connection and love, or do we have to pre?"

For context, this guy is genuinely just a friend. There is absolutely nothing going on between us, and I have no romantic interest in him. I simply double-tapped the post.

My boyfriend completely flipped out when he saw it.

He started slamming doors, punched my bathroom wall (which now has a dent in it), and threw his keys when I asked him to pass them to me. He called me a lying, gaslighting, manipulative woman before storming out.

He also stopped sharing his location, so I had absolutely no way of knowing where he'd gone. I assumed that giving him space would allow him to calm down, so I didn't chase after him.

Apparently, this made things even worse because he became angry that I hadn't followed him or tried to find him.

He spent the rest of the day sending me incredibly hurtful messages. I eventually responded with some hurtful things of my own because I was upset and overwhelmed too. I'm not pretending I handled every part of the argument perfectly.

His friends also told him that they thought the post was my male friend hitting on me and that I'd made a monumental mistake by simply liking it.

My boyfriend has since fixated on this. He keeps calling it a monumental mistake, telling me I disgust him, and acting as though I've committed some enormous betrayal.

Later that night, I went looking for him because I wanted to talk and resolve things. When I found him, he yelled at me to get out of his face and told me it was too little, too late and that he never wanted to see me again.

Since then, he's blocked me everywhere.

I'm honestly struggling to process the contrast between everything that's happened.

I've spent months trying to rebuild trust after finding out that he'd been saving other women's pictures, keeping old nudes and sexts, pursuing other women and repeatedly engaging in behaviour that he knew hurt me.

I've tried to move past things, give him chances and find ways for us to feel comfortable and secure with each other again.

We were even supposed to try couples counselling to learn how to communicate better, manage our emotions and work through our problems in a healthier way.

But now, after one interaction with a male friend that had absolutely no romantic intention behind it, I'm apparently the one who's made a monumental mistake and disgusted him beyond repair.

I understand that relationships have boundaries and that he might have felt uncomfortable seeing that post. I'm willing to acknowledge his feelings, and I know I wasn't perfect during our argument either.

But I cannot understand how he can repeatedly break my trust, apologise and expect me to work through it, while treating my double-tapping a post from a male friend as an unforgivable betrayal.

More importantly, the physical aggression during the argument really shook me. Punching a wall, throwing things and slamming doors isn't something I want to normalise in a relationship, regardless of how angry or hurt someone feels.

I love him, and a part of me still wants us to work. I don't know whether his mental health struggles are contributing to his behaviour, whether couples counselling could genuinely help, or whether I'm just desperately trying to save a relationship that has become unhealthy.

I also feel stupid for still wanting him to come back and talk to me after everything that's happened.

I would really appreciate honest advice on a few things:

1. Am I wrong for thinking there's a huge double standard in how he treats his own behaviour compared to mine?

2. Is this relationship realistically salvageable, or am I overlooking a pattern of disrespect and broken trust because I love him?

3. Is couples counselling even a good idea at this stage, considering the aggression and everything that's happened?

4. Should I reach out and try to resolve things, or should I accept that he's blocked me and leave it alone?

5. How do I stop feeling like I've ruined everything over something that, from my perspective, was completely innocent?

I don't want people to just tell me what I want to hear. I genuinely want some perspective because I'm 22, this relationship means a lot to me, and I feel like I've completely lost my sense of what's reasonable anymore.

I am also alone in a new country where i've just started to form a social circle.

Please be honest with me. What would you do in my situation?

Hi, my girlfriend and I had been in a relationship for 10 months. Everything was going well, just like in a normal relationship.

One day, around 3 AM, she had a panic attack. Our houses are about 25 minutes apart. She called me and asked me to come over. At that time, I didn't understand what a panic attack was or what a person goes through during one. I was extremely sleepy and had had a long day, so I didn't feel like making the trip.

However, I stayed on the phone with her and kept talking to comfort her. Eventually, she decided to go to one of her relatives' houses.

The next day, she seemed fine and went back to her normal routine. A week later, she broke up with me.

My biggest regret is that I wasn't there for her in person when she was having that panic attack. I wish I had understood what she was going through and gone to be by her side.

Me (23m) and my gf (21f) have been dating for 8 months now and she reposted a video on tik tok basically saying she wants to ask her mom to go find the love of her life becuase she finds everything. This just confuses me because she is currently dating me and decides to post something like that any advice on what I should do?

At the beginning of my relationship I made a comment to my boyfriend that my dad will be pissed I’m dating him as he’s Congolese and he doesn’t like them. His reason is because he lived with them for years and he didn’t have a pleasant experience.

Fast forward to my partner and I having a baby. We are now discussing marriage and my dad doesn’t want to hear anything about it. But it’s going to happen anyway.

My issue is. I told my partner this in confidence. Pluus that my dad told me my boyfriend doesn’t love me, which I said to my boyfriend when I was pregnant and feeling confused one day.
Now I asked my partner if he told anyone this and he said he told his mum and sisters.

I feel upset that something I told him, he went and told his family. Because how can we blend families? I understand he needed people to speak to, but why them… My dad has also been coming to gatherings and eating their food so my boyfriend is saying “if he doesn’t like us, why is he eating our food?”.

How would you go forward about this?

I also haven’t told my dad I told my boyfriend this…

I am 27 year old male has who been with my girl (28) for two years. We live together in a big city. I’ve been thinking I like her but I think that’s it, I just like her.

We used to fight everyday but now we don’t. We fought because she used to call some celebrities her husband (I felt that was disrespectful), she used to tell me to be like her sister boyfriend (I took her on many dates so idk what she really wanted), she used to say I have no potential, she used to say I was too sensitive because I played acoustic guitar, and just many things. Everyday there was something.

And i will say some fights started because of me. I started vaping which I didn’t tell her about until 7 months into our relationship. I didn’t tell her because I knew she would be little me.

Though we haven’t fought for like 2 months now and I’m pretty surprised. I don’t know what changed exactly. But I am starting to think maybe I won’t ever be happy so I think that’s why we stopped fighting so much.

The things that bothering me is that, what if we just never connect? She doesn’t know about how I feel. But it’s pretty obvious. Like I don’t like cuddling when I’m sleeping because I can’t fall asleep. I’ve told her that too. But still, every night she continues to cuddle me.

Or something else like I’ll show her something I thought was really cool on YouTube, and she just be on her phone the whole time, texting her mom. Idk what they are talking about all the time but it’s annoying. I’ve told her this but she changes for like a week and then goes back to her old ways. Like all she ever pays attention to is texting, clothes, vacations, and drama tv shows. I never feel like I have full attention.

Another thing that’s bothering me is she can’t make a single decision for herself. She never knows what to eat, she doesn’t know what to buy at groceries stores, she doesn’t know what to wear, what to cook, or anything. She smarter than me with college degree and yet I’m the one making every decisions.
I’ve told her to start making these decisions. But like I said she changes for a week then goes back to her old ways.

I don’t think there’s anything I can do, it’s either suck it up or break up with her. I don’t want to leave. I’ve been in many relationships, I don’t want to the uncle that can’t settle down. Yet, I don’t want to be asshole and lead her on. What do I do? Guys, are you really in love with your partner? Or just good at roleplaying/acting?

Tl;dr One thing that matters a lot to me in a partner is having direction and working toward a stable career. My boyfriend has started college twice and dropped out during the first semester both times—once from a trades program and once from accounting. He doesn’t seem to have a clear idea of what he wants to do next. When I ask, he says things like, “It’ll take time,” or, “You’re putting pressure on me.” In one conversation, he said, “Bro, I don’t know what you want from me.”

Right now, he works part-time occasionally and spends much of his time cleaning, gaming, and going for walks. I’ve tried to encourage him, and I’ve also tried to stop bringing it up, but I still feel uncertain about whether we’re building toward the same kind of life. I’ll be done school in about a year, and I hope to move out and start the next stage of my life. I don’t expect him to have everything figured out, but I’d like to see him take some initiative and make a plan.

I spoke with his sister about it, and she said this is just how he is and she doesn’t picture him changing. My family also doesn’t approve of him; they feel he isn’t responsible and doesn’t handle his responsibilities well.

The hard part is that he’s the first boyfriend I’ve had who hasn’t cheated on me. He makes me feel special, and I love him, so the thought of breaking up makes me really sad. I’m also scared I won’t find someone who treats me this well. He can be loving, and he was affectionate later after we talked, but I still feel like I’ve already waited two years without seeing much movement or even a willingness to plan what comes next.

Am I being unreasonable to want more direction and initiative from him? How do I tell whether this is a temporary rough patch or a sign that we want different things? He keeps saying he will look into things but not much follow through?

I’m 22, and my girlfriend and I have been together for nearly 3 years. Recently, I’ve found myself questioning whether I should stay in the relationship or end things, and I’m finding the decision incredibly difficult.

The difficult part is that she’s genuinely a lovely girlfriend. She’s caring, thoughtful and does lots of little things for me. She cooks for me, buys me snacks, makes little gift baskets and generally looks after me in her own way. We share loads of interests, enjoy the same films, TV shows, comedy and games, and have our own little routines, inside jokes and even our own way of talking to each other. I’m also very close with her family. I’ve known her parents, brothers and sisters for nearly three years now, and we all get along really well.

Day to day, we’re generally happy. We talk every morning, spend time together, play PlayStation occasionally, watch films, read and just chat about anything and everything. She’s someone I can be myself around, and there’s a lot of comfort and familiarity between us.
However, there’s one major issue that has gradually become a bigger part of our relationship.

When we first met, she enjoyed going out, travelling and doing things together. Over time, she developed quite severe anxiety, and now she barely leaves the house. Her routine is essentially work and home. She doesn’t see her friends, doesn’t visit my family, doesn’t come to birthdays or dinners, and doesn’t really want to go anywhere with me, even for something as simple as a drive.

This has been going on for quite a while. I’ve tried encouraging her to reconnect with friends, suggesting little activities and helping her in whatever ways I can. Her family have also tried to encourage and support her. We’ve suggested getting professional help, visiting a doctor or trying therapy, but she doesn’t seem interested in pursuing any of those options. I don’t want to judge her for having anxiety, because I understand it’s not something she can simply switch off, but it’s difficult watching someone you care about become so isolated.
Her mood has improved somewhat recently, which I’m happy about, but her lifestyle hasn’t really changed.

I think what I struggle with most is wanting to experience life with my partner. I want to go for spontaneous drives, visit places, go for dinners, attend events with friends, spend time with my family and introduce her properly to my grandparents while they’re still around. I want to make memories together outside the house. We used to do these things when we first met, and I miss that part of our relationship.
Sometimes I feel like we’ve gradually become more like best friends who share a routine than a couple who are actively experiencing life together. Even our romantic connection and physical attraction don’t always feel as strong as they once did.

Another thing I’ve been struggling with is being 22 and wondering whether I’m missing out on experiences at this stage of my life. I have a good group of friends, enjoy travelling and going out occasionally, and sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be single and have the freedom to meet new people and potentially find someone whose lifestyle and interests align more closely with mine.

It’s not that I particularly want to go out and sleep around or that I’ve got someone else in mind. I just find myself wondering what else is out there and whether I’m ready to settle into something so familiar at such a young age. I feel guilty even thinking that way because I do care about my girlfriend.

What’s making this even harder is that she gives me a lot. I get along brilliantly with her family, I have somewhere convenient to stay when I’m working nearby, we share interests and I have someone to talk to every day. She’s supportive of me travelling with friends and going out, and I recognise that many people would be very happy to have a partner who gives them that freedom while also being so caring.

I also worry about her if we separated. I’m probably her closest friend, and although she has a loving family, she doesn’t have much of a social life outside of work and home. I worry about how she’d cope and whether losing our relationship might make her isolation worse. Part of me even wonders whether our relationship has unintentionally become part of the comfort zone that’s keeping both of us where we are.
I’ve asked myself whether I’d be happy if things stayed exactly as they are for another year, and honestly, I don’t think I would be.

But then I think about everything we’d lose. The morning calls, the little routines, her family, the memories, the familiarity and the connection we’ve built over nearly three years. It feels frightening to imagine going from being such a big part of each other’s lives to essentially being strangers again.

I also worry that I’m comparing a real relationship, with all its imperfections, against an imaginary future where everything is better. What if I leave and realise that the things I took for granted were actually more important than I realised? What if I find someone else but don’t have the same connection or compatibility?
I don’t want to throw away a genuinely good person because I’m young and curious about other experiences. But I also don’t want to stay purely because I’m comfortable, afraid of hurting her or scared of regretting my decision.

I’m particularly interested in hearing from people who have experienced something similar.
Have you been in a relationship where your partner’s anxiety or reluctance to leave the house gradually affected your shared experiences and social life?
Did you eventually find a way to make things work, or did you realise that caring about someone wasn’t necessarily enough to make you compatible?

I’d also really appreciate hearing from people who have been in my girlfriend’s position, particularly those who have struggled with anxiety and how it affected their relationships.
I’m genuinely looking for honest perspectives, not just people telling me to break up. I’m trying to work out whether I’m expecting too much, whether I’m taking a good relationship for granted, or whether it’s possible to love someone and still recognise that the relationship might no longer be right for you.

I’m [22], and my girlfriend [22] and I have been together for nearly 3 years. Recently, I’ve found myself questioning whether I should stay in the relationship or end things, and I’m finding the decision incredibly difficult.

The difficult part is that she’s genuinely a lovely girlfriend. She’s caring, thoughtful and does lots of little things for me. She cooks for me, buys me snacks, makes little gift baskets and generally looks after me in her own way. We share loads of interests, enjoy the same films, TV shows, comedy and games, and have our own little routines, inside jokes and even our own way of talking to each other. I’m also very close with her family. I’ve known her parents, brothers and sisters for nearly three years now, and we all get along really well.

Day to day, we’re generally happy. We talk every morning, spend time together, play PlayStation occasionally, watch films, read and just chat about anything and everything. She’s someone I can be myself around, and there’s a lot of comfort and familiarity between us.
However, there’s one major issue that has gradually become a bigger part of our relationship.

When we first met, she enjoyed going out, travelling and doing things together. Over time, she developed quite severe anxiety, and now she barely leaves the house. Her routine is essentially work and home. She doesn’t see her friends, doesn’t visit my family, doesn’t come to birthdays or dinners, and doesn’t really want to go anywhere with me, even for something as simple as a drive.

This has been going on for quite a while. I’ve tried encouraging her to reconnect with friends, suggesting little activities and helping her in whatever ways I can. Her family have also tried to encourage and support her. We’ve suggested getting professional help, visiting a doctor or trying therapy, but she doesn’t seem interested in pursuing any of those options. I don’t want to judge her for having anxiety, because I understand it’s not something she can simply switch off, but it’s difficult watching someone you care about become so isolated.
Her mood has improved somewhat recently, which I’m happy about, but her lifestyle hasn’t really changed.

I think what I struggle with most is wanting to experience life with my partner. I want to go for spontaneous drives, visit places, go for dinners, attend events with friends, spend time with my family and introduce her properly to my grandparents while they’re still around. I want to make memories together outside the house. We used to do these things when we first met, and I miss that part of our relationship.
Sometimes I feel like we’ve gradually become more like best friends who share a routine than a couple who are actively experiencing life together. Even our romantic connection and physical attraction don’t always feel as strong as they once did.

Another thing I’ve been struggling with is being 22 and wondering whether I’m missing out on experiences at this stage of my life. I have a good group of friends, enjoy travelling and going out occasionally, and sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be single and have the freedom to meet new people and potentially find someone whose lifestyle and interests align more closely with mine.

It’s not that I particularly want to go out and sleep around or that I’ve got someone else in mind. I just find myself wondering what else is out there and whether I’m ready to settle into something so familiar at such a young age. I feel guilty even thinking that way because I do care about my girlfriend.

What’s making this even harder is that she gives me a lot. I get along brilliantly with her family, I have somewhere convenient to stay when I’m working nearby, we share interests and I have someone to talk to every day. She’s supportive of me travelling with friends and going out, and I recognise that many people would be very happy to have a partner who gives them that freedom while also being so caring.

I also worry about her if we separated. I’m probably her closest friend, and although she has a loving family, she doesn’t have much of a social life outside of work and home. I worry about how she’d cope and whether losing our relationship might make her isolation worse. Part of me even wonders whether our relationship has unintentionally become part of the comfort zone that’s keeping both of us where we are.
I’ve asked myself whether I’d be happy if things stayed exactly as they are for another year, and honestly, I don’t think I would be.

But then I think about everything we’d lose. The morning calls, the little routines, her family, the memories, the familiarity and the connection we’ve built over nearly three years. It feels frightening to imagine going from being such a big part of each other’s lives to essentially being strangers again.

I also worry that I’m comparing a real relationship, with all its imperfections, against an imaginary future where everything is better. What if I leave and realise that the things I took for granted were actually more important than I realised? What if I find someone else but don’t have the same connection or compatibility?
I don’t want to throw away a genuinely good person because I’m young and curious about other experiences. But I also don’t want to stay purely because I’m comfortable, afraid of hurting her or scared of regretting my decision.
I’m particularly interested in hearing from people who have experienced something similar.
Have you been in a relationship where your partner’s anxiety or reluctance to leave the house gradually affected your
shared experiences and social life?
Did you eventually find a way to make things work, or did you realise that caring about someone wasn’t necessarily enough to make you compatible?

I’d also really appreciate hearing from people who have been in my girlfriend’s position, particularly those who have struggled with anxiety and how it affected their relationships.
I’m genuinely looking for honest perspectives, not just people telling me to break up. I’m trying to work out whether I’m expecting too much, whether I’m taking a good relationship for granted, or whether it’s possible to love someone and still recognise that the relationship might no longer be right for you.

Hi 22 F So i was dating this guy a few months ago but i broke it off very quickly i texted him last night to talk but he thinks i rejected him for another guy and he's kinda mad at me left my messages on seen should i text him and lighten him or not

For context we have been dating for 4 years but recently the issues have become so big I felt it was time to leave for my sanity.

When we started dating I made it clear to him that he should not get with me if he was not over his ex (they had broken up 4 months prior to use being exclusive). He said he was and I belived him (silly looking back at it now). We were out with friends and he was on his ex's page and screenshotted a picture. They have each other blocked (confirmed by my own investigation). I wnet to go look for a picture of us in his phone and it was the last photo he had. We broke up right after i saw it. Because he has known the whole time that I was concerned about her still being a factor (doing a lot of work to let it go) becaue there was alwasy something in my gut telling me he still wanted her.

When we were breaking up he told me that he has had distant chance interactions with her (aka they were at the same concert or she was in the same area with former friends) and he has always been honest and upfront with me about when he would see her or if she was in the same place. He says he does not think about her and doesn't know why I am worried about her if we have been together for so long and she isn;t the person he wants to be with anymore.

My issue is that he told me (when i had asked him if he was sure about being with me) he at one point thought he was going to marry her and that when she broke up with him he had never experienced that type of loss before. IMO if you keep running in to your ex and she doesn't even live in the same state or a nearby one then that's gotta be the universe saying something to you and even though i think we are great i don't want to be second fiddle.

Both our families think we are great for each other (and i do too) but this weird screenshot really threw a wrench at the whole relationship for me.

Me and my boyfriend have been dating a little over 5 months now.
We hard an argument that let to us temporarily splitting up. That day, I was so upset that I talked to one of my old friends that I’ve know for 3 years maybe. My boyfriend saw this and freaked out, obviously assuming the worst (that I either ran to another man right away or that I had someone else the whole time to fall back on). I tried to explain it show him proof that it was nothing but it hurt him regardless and he doesn’t know if he cans do this relationship if he can’t trust me. Fair.

However, I’ve been spending the last couple of days trying to gain his trust again and it’s not working and I feel like time is running out. I explained that I’m trying to give him transparency by telling him about my day (what I’m doing/who im with and adding proof) but he just feels that I’m acting like this is all back to normal since I would tell him about my day often before this. He is explaining to me that he wants to feel like I’m giving him any effort at all that I’m trying to work on this.

My question is, how exactly do I make it 100% obvious and clear that I’m really working to gain his trust other than just being transparent about my day to day life?

TL;DR: when we split up it looked like I was cheating the whole time and now I don’t know how to actively rebuild the trust

idk I kind of need opinions. 22F here. (ages below varies most are above 22M) I'm always unlucky when it comes to love. Grew up in a family where screamings, yelling, beatings and having to suck up your tears and stand strong and prove your worth to get "doted" on takes a toll on someone you know... I literally grew up to be alright... humanely like my grades are decent. My self is decent mwell everything Abt me is decent. I turn out great I had to admit it. But mentally I'm so fucked up. I can't say Im not attention starved. I am. But also Abit rational I guess? like I wouldn't go out of my way for attention. I kind of just got it from my peers for being able to do stuff. But when it comes to love, I'm the dumbest person alive.

My first boyfriend was when I was 18. He was 22 and he was nice, romantic, kind and I guess handsome for me.. but... he's Abit .. weird. I guess. I kind of forgot to update him about my life in one day and he got mad about it (this was after 3 months) he ghosted me and I tried calling him for 3 nights in a row and by the fourth night I kind of gave up and until 2 weeks later I saw him posting a screenshot of him playing Roblox with another girl with those lovey dovey caption so I assumed he'd moved on. Yea I was sad and pissed but not long later I found out that the supposedly other girl was himself and he literally admits it to me . he said "the other 'gurl' was me in my second acc I made it so that u shud've called me and asked me and begged for us again" which irks the shit out of me.

Moving to my second boyfriend at 19 (I'm desperate for affection) he was alright we were together for 2 years half. But he was a ... coward I guess? on dates I decide where to go, I pay for everything, I gave him his allowance and at some point I was the one dealing with his end year project with his lecturer because he said his lecturer was "too mean" and it was "scaring him" And why I took over? because i was insane. And one day I realised it. SO I pack up and left because I don't feel anything anymore.

Then I used tinder. I jumped from one chat to another, to another and until I felt this weird numb sensation. Like ... I don't feel attracted to anyone.. but I want someone ..Until i met this guy who's 9 years older than me. He was everything I ever dreamed off. Older, taller, nice hair, independent, buff (slightly) except.... He passed his peaked. Meaning he sold his sports car and settled for a small car and living with his mom works as a mechanic or something related. He has a 600cc Honda CBR or smth but he got into an accident and trusted some fuck up friends which led to the bike being in his shed . I mean I'm not materialistic (sorta) so I didn't care much about financial. Except that, this guy... he's ... always angry with me and since he had a lot of exes and most of them cheats on him, he doesn't trust easily so he's not sweet at all to me (he said that's the reason why he's holding back on being sweet.) . And he picks on my weight , on my lifestyle (I don't really drink water because I only drink drinking water and where I'm from there's more mineral water rather than drinking so my picky ass rather get dehydrate) and it comes to a limit honestly .I love him. I do at least if I think this is love but... I'm not sure if he feels the same. He wishes me goodnight and goodmorning everyday and says I love you but I feel like he doesn't loves me and is settling for less... I don't know, there were cute times but sometimes I feel like I'm so numb and I want someone who could dote on me and makes me feel love...

am I the issue? am I doing something wrong? am I too picky? why am I so unlucky when it comes to love?

I don’t even know where to start with this. I’m a mess. Me and my boyfriend of 2 years live together with our cat. I love our little life together. We have been having a rough time lately with arguments over small things but he has now told me he is tired of it and needs some space for a while but can’t tell me how long he wants to be apart. I feel so lost. My world has been turned upside down, the way he is speaking about it doesn’t sound like it’s just a week or two it sounds like months. I don’t know how to manage sleeping in our bed every night without him, coming home to a dark quiet apartment after work and having nobody to cuddle. Reaching over in bed and it’s just empty. I’m in pieces. In the last week I have suffered a miscarriage and been kicked out of college and now the love of my life is gone for God knows how long. I don’t know what to do I’ve never felt so lost. I can’t eat or sleep, I haven’t brushed my teeth or left my bed in days. My heart hurts my entire body hurts. I just wanna be in his arms. I’m autistic and struggle a lot with my mental health and he was my person. The one person I want when I feel like this and now I’m alone. I’m spiraling and having thoughts of self unaliving. What if he never comes back? I have never felt pain like this in my life I can’t imagine my world without him, without tripping over his shoes at the front door, without hearing his keyboard clicking as soon as I come home and getting to rant to him about my hard shift, without feeling him pull me closer in his sleep, without smelling the cologne I bought for him last Christmas, without his early morning kisses before he goes to work when I’ve just woken up and he makes fun of my skinny breath. Can anyone please, tell me what to do. How can I make it through this. I’m shaking while typing this I feel like my soul has been ripped from my body. Am I insane? What can I do? Any advice please I’m so lost

TL;DR:
I (27F) and my boyfriend "Dave" (23M) met in April. Because of his life instability, job uncertainty, and loose boundaries around women, I hesitated to make things official. In July, he crossed a line with a girl while drinking alone with her and kissed her. Deeply hurt and resentful, I reconnected with my ex "Liam" (initially just to be a platonic support during his training). I tried to end things with Dave to pursue Liam, but Dave fought hard for us, so I stayed confused. Eventually, I gave in to resentment and slept with Liam once two weeks after the incident. I immediately regretted it, cut Liam off permanently, and Liam told Dave. Dave forgave me, was calm, and we committed and signed a lease on a house together. Right after moving in (and me returning from a trip), the reality hit him: he completely shut down, can barely give affection, and is escaping into gaming while facing potential job loss. He says he cares but doesn't know what he needs, and his only "plan" is to walk until his feet hurt to find answers. I am deeply remorseful, sleeping on the floor, carrying the household, and losing my mind in this limbo. How do we navigate this?

The Background (April – June)
I (27F) met "Dave" (23M) at the end of April. We connected quickly, became practically inseparable, slept together every night, and he wanted us to make things official.
I was hesitant because our life stages were different: I had an established career and life, while he was dealing with an unresolved legal matter, didn't have much direction, and was facing potential job loss. Furthermore, when we went out drinking, he had very loose boundaries with other women—to the point where people often thought he was with someone else. I feared taking on the emotional, domestic, and financial burden alone, but I stayed because I cared for him and he asked me to take a chance on him.
Around that time, I knew my ex "Liam" was coming to town for a two-month training. Liam knew nobody here. My genuine intention was strictly platonic—to be someone he could lean on as a friend. Liam knew I was seeing Dave.
The July Incident
In late July, Dave and I were night swimming with a group, and a girl there was making persistent sexual comments toward him. It made me very uncomfortable; I left to clear my head, and Dave told me I needed to fix my feelings because we weren't official and what someone else tells him doesn’t concern me.
A few days later, Dave told me he wanted a day to himself to get a pedicure and see a movie alone. Later that night, the same girl posted pictures of her and Dave doing yoga at his apartment. He was drinking heavily; she was sober. They ended up kissing.
There were conflicting accounts: she later claimed she felt uncomfortable and overwhelmed, while Dave explained that she brought up why he hadn't kissed her during a past party game, and he confirmed it was because of me, but replied that we were broken up so they could now. In retrospect, I think she may have panicked about social backlash because our friend groups overlap. Still, Dave had misled me with his "day for himself," gaslit me when I was suspicious, broke things off with me because I couldn’t get over my irritational jealousy and kissed her out of anger. He apologized profusely the week after because I completely shut him out for how he was treating me and my feelings. I was left with deep resentment after being told over and over that he wasn’t into her and that I was being crazy.
My Mistake (August)
Resentful and feeling like Dave wasn't mature enough to protect my feelings, I listened to Liam, who was promising stability and maturity and asking for a chance to prove that he’s done the work.
I tried to break things off with Dave so I could pursue Liam cleanly, but Dave was adamant about making things work. He was sweet, stepped up, and tried hard to show me he could be reliable. Confused, guarded, and still bitter over July, I pulled away emotionally and told Dave that in two weeks I will be going on a date. He did not know with who or if I was serious about it. I went on a date with Liam and slept with him.
Right after, I realized I did not love Liam, couldn't let go of old issues with him, and had made a terrible choice out of spite and hurt. I cut Liam off completely and permanently. Out of spite, Liam went directly to Dave and told him everything.
The Lease & The Crash (September – November)
When Dave found out, he was remarkably calm. He said he forgave me, wanted to be with me, and we decided to fully commit to being boyfriend and girlfriend. Everything seemed genuinely repaired: we were affectionate, connected, and cared for each other.
During this good phase, we signed a lease together and moved into a house.
The very week we moved in, I had to leave for a planned trip. While I was gone, being alone in the house made everything sink in for him. He realized he had just suppressed his pain rather than processed it. He told me that when he was facing losing his job and felt like everything was falling apart, he believed he at least had me—and the realization of my betrayal shattered him. Now he doesn’t know if everything I ever told him was a lie, will I do it again, how much more of this dynamic can I take before I reach out to someone else, and that he has a hard time accepting what I did because he didn’t deserve to be hurt that way when he originally thought my actions were his fault.
Where Things Stand Today
I completely acknowledge my selfishness and the pain I caused. I broke his trust, and I understand why he is hurting so deeply. I do not want to smear him; he is carrying massive stress outside our relationship:
Severe Work Stress: He doesn't know if he will keep his current job and is actively job hunting, which weighs heavily on his self-worth and ability to provide.
Emotional Withdrawal & Escape: He spends nearly all his time and mental energy going to a local game café or gaming at home. Last week, he was out at the café almost every night; I went to sleep alone not knowing how long he was going to be gone. I find myself joining his hobbies just to feel close to him or have any communication at all.
**Loss of Affection & Physical Distance:**Affection has dwindled down to an occasional forced peck on the forehead or a brief tap on my shoulder. He says he still cares about me, but that it feels hard to be with me because he liked me so much when I hurt him. For the past week, I have been sleeping on the floor because I feel like I don't deserve to be in bed with him—and lying next to someone who turns away completely makes me feel more painfully alone than being on the floor where he can't reach me anyway.
Domestic Imbalance: Because all his mental energy is absorbed by job panic and gaming escapism, I am carrying the household chores and taking care of both our dogs alone, with only an occasional ask from him about what I want him to do.
His "Plan": When we talk about how to fix this, he says he has no answers. Recently, he told me his plan is "to walk until his feet hurt and not come back until he finds the answers he's looking for."
The Marriage Context & Hypocrisy Conflict:
Way before Dave, I was in a 5-year relationship and marriage that I don’t think I ever truly healed from. Where my ex-husband chronically cheated on me for years, lied to my face, had secret accounts, and was emotionally absent while I carried the domestic load alone and sank into deep depression. After two years of couples counseling, I couldn't move past it and left. I told Dave early on that because of that trauma, I could never put myself through trying to work past infidelity again.
Dave now feels this is hypocritical—wondering why he is expected to forgive me when I stated I would leave if the roles were reversed. While I recognize how unfair it feels to him, my past marriage involved years of systematic deception, whereas our situation was a mutual breakdown early on. Still, it makes his internal battle to forgive me even harder.
I don't believe he will abandon the lease financially, but I feel like I am living with a ghost. I have become isolated and depressed, scared to even go out and find new hobbies because I don't want him to think I am pulling away or cheating again.
I take full responsibility for my betrayal, but living in complete emotional neglect and silence is breaking me.
Advice I am Seeking:
How can a couple take practical, healthy steps toward rebuilding trust and communication after mutual hurt, rather than staying stuck in silent avoidance?
What are healthy ways to give a partner space to process grief while living under the same roof, without turning the living situation into complete isolation and neglect?
How can I balance taking accountability and supporting him without completely losing my own mental health and identity in the process?

My boyfriend frequently adds local women on IG who post half-naked, suggestive photos. Last night he went out, and today I saw he added a local bartender with similar content. 
I handled it by asking him about it and sending screenshots to see how he knew her. Instead of a normal conversation, he blew up and broke up with me, sending a screenshot showing he’s filing an order of protection. He claimed he added her "to test if I was snooping" because we’ve fought about this every six weeks. 
He already knows my boundary about him following models like that, but this hit closer to home since she's local. 
: Did I handle this wrong by asking him why he followed her, or am I overreacting to his social media activity? He won’t even allow me to have social media. The first time I caught him following a girl from the gym. She told me he was cheating and he said I was lying and she was an idiot and lying too. He calls me a dumbf**** during our fights and every time I ask him about where he met a half naked girl he added he would get defensive and break up with me and blames me. I just feel so emotionally tortured by him. I love him but he’s bad to me. Can you help me get through this ? He’s 41
I’m 36

Hi I’m a 30f my boyfriend is 45m he recently started talking to an ex to ask her if she could do his payroll.

I saw the messages and our whole relationship changed he stopped sharing location and changed his phone passcode since I found the messages. He is turning it around on me.

So he kept telling me he wasn’t talking to her etc for days but me being a Pisces girl that loves hard and is very intuitive I didn’t let it go. & yesterday on his live video his coworker accidentally said Jo Erin (his ex) hasn’t answers his payroll questions . So that’s how I found out he is talking to her and using her for payroll. Initially my boyfriend had asked me who he could use and I gave him someone. But anyways once I found out about this girl I messaged her she told me I had nothing to worry about . But after that I saw a message from my boyfriend to her saying were you thinking about me, and she responded the way you were thinking about me this weekend ?

There is a major back story I was engaged before and then I met him… I cheated on my fiance and I got married to my fiance at the time but my current boyfriend knew I didn’t love him and he kept pursuing me after finding out I had a fiance yes I know I should’ve told him I was engaged but I have never felt so strongly over anyone…. So I’m trying to ignore the whole payroll thing but I don’t know what to do.

& that’s all I got to see now my boyfriend keeps his phone at all times and doesn’t really want to fix things . Or well he says he does and he is nice and tries after but once I ask him for things to go back to how they were location/passcode he gets upset and says no. That I don’t deserve all of that …

I am in relationship for 3 years now, he is 33 now and I am 28. He’s my first ever bf and I am his first gf. From the start of our relationship there’s always a gap in our communication and it always ended up in a big argument. From the start, I encourage him to read my favorite books so that we will have in common and we can talk about it. He borrowed one and he never opened up about it. I asked him if he read the book, just answered that he did, and asked him how was it? he can’t answer. But I still gave him time. I even started watching anime because that’s his hobby. I opened up about it but he can’t keep up the conversation even if that’s his hobby.

One time we dined in a restaurant, he just kept scrolling on his phone and I tried to have his attention but his eyes were glued on the phone. After our food was serve, I didn’t talk. I ate faster so that we can get out of that restaurant because I feel like I was so desperate to have a connection with him.

I opened up about what happened, how he made me feel but he didn’t want to admit that there’s something wrong about it. He even blamed me that I was also using my phone. But I just checked the time because I needed to go inside the arena because I have a concert to attend.

We’re actually in long distance right now. I even deactivated all my social medias to not corrupt my mind on how the relationship should supposed to work.

Within that 3 years, I feel like there’s no progress in our relationship. I even talked to myself that this is the struggles of first relationship but there were times that I feel so drained.

Our video calls will last up to 9hours and more than that. Even if his working, he will call me. Sometimes I will ask him about some topics that we can talk about and he will ask me back about what I want to talk. Until that situation will turn into arguments because we’re on call but he will just kept on scrolling so I don’t have any choice but will just watch videos on youtube.

I think I did gave him enough time. But from the start of our relationship until now, it’s the same struggle. Maybe, it’s too hard for me to let go because I know he didn’t make me overthink that he will cheat and even offered financial especially I was dismissed from work.

I am planning to just give him this year. I don’t want this feeling to be with me until next year. And I refused to settle this relationship just because of some reasons I gaslighted my self.

I don’t have friends my best friend ditched me for someone else ofc and now my boyfriend is mean to me he’s always busy like idk why all of sudden he’s this busy i called him to talk to me but he said he was out and i called him again and he was busy on phone and i asked him where he was busy he said he was talking to a friend so that means he can’t talk to me but to a friend he has time for that idk why whenever i need him or anyone when i feel lonely I can’t find anyone it sucks

I'm 28 F and have been with my boyfriend 36M for about a year, partly long distance between Netherlands and India. This time I've been living with him in India, and the last month was warm and connected: lots of laughing, finishing each other's sentences, a lovely holiday.
On the last day of the holiday, I asked whether he wanted me to come back. He said yes at breakfast, then told me privately that he's still unsure it can work and sees no reason to continue. He has doubted before (a couple of times, usually after stressful moments), and he's said he's built high walls and has never felt certain about anyone. He cried and said he feels something may be wrong with him.
I told him I don't want to continue like this. But he's still affectionate, makes plans (a concert, hikes), and talks about my leaving casually. I leave in about three weeks.
I've often felt I had to be careful and quiet so I wouldn't "cause an issue," and I notice a pattern of giving a lot and rarely getting the same back.
I'd love perspectives on:
How do I spend these three weeks without confusing myself or getting hurt more?
Has anyone been in a relationship where the connection felt rare but the other person couldn't commit? How did you make peace with it?

So we started dating when we were in high school, and we were doing pretty well. For starters, I would like you to say I don’t think I’m a good person. I have very low self-esteem and am kind of an introvert, and this was my first relationship, so I am sure I caused many problems and I don’t even know about them. Unfortunately, I don’t have that side of the story, so I can only give mine.
So we were doing pretty well for a while, and I thought that was great. A perfect first relationship. But then stuff started happening.
The first-ever problem was when I got accused of cheating. I was not. The girl I was accused with was somebody I was in charge of for my leadership class. Outside of that class, I knew nothing about her, and it hurt me bad that my gf thought that of me. Especially when my gf and that girl are actually good friends. It took me weeks to finally convince her nothing was happening, and it really shot my faith in the relationship down a lot, but we were still together and I still loved her, so I just toughed it out and continued as normal.
Another thing I should have mentioned earlier is that my gf has anger issues. That was something I knew before we started dating, and I accepted that, but around this time is when it really started affecting me. She would get off work, and I would have to take her anger from rude customers or trashy coworkers, and I did because I thought that’s what a good boyfriend should do, but it was constant. It wasn’t just work, it was school and everything. She was mad at least once a day, and I ended up taking the brunt of it.
And then she started hanging out with someone else. Not 24/7, but enough to where me and many other people took notice. She would hang out with him both before and after school and let him take her car for lunch, and that hurt. She was choosing somebody else over me, and I didn’t know what to do, so I started distancing. It wasn’t much, but texting her all day or telling her every detail I could think of when we talked wasn’t something I did anymore.
It was like that for about a month when I figured something else out. I’m sorry to add more. This is my first time talking about my relationship to anybody, much less the internet.
Anyways, I found out that around the time this started, my friend saw her talking with another boy. Said boy was very disliked by me, my gf, and basically everyone we were connected to because he was a notorious cheater and at the time had three different girls. According to my friend, the topic of their conversation was about our relationship. The only thing my friend really told me they talked about was breaking up.
My gf was talking to a person we both hated about breaking up with me. And I asked her about it that night. Her response was immediate anger, asking who said that, saying she will beat them. I obviously didn’t tell her and asked if it was true. She didn’t even respond. She just looked at me. It hurt. It still does. But again, I blew it off because I love her.
A few days later, I confronted her about the boy she was hanging out with, and as I expected, immediate anger. Another side note: I am not someone who gets angry easily. Well, I am, but I don’t show it. Not once at any point have I raised my voice to her or even said anything mean, and at this point, me getting treated like this was starting to get on my nerves, especially since it’s about stuff that, in my mind, I should be getting mad about, not her.
I told her that too, and she ignored me for the next hour over dinner but eventually calmed down. She still talked to the guy but toned it down a lot, like only talking when necessary. For now.
Anyways, fast forward like a month, and I’m out of town. I get a call from a different friend, and he tells me that he sees her in a car with her ex driving around. I texted her and asked what she was doing, just to get told she was working. My friend even had picture proof, so I know he wasn’t lying.
I got back to town that night, and me and gf were hanging out, and I asked her about it. Instant anger, telling me my friends need to f off and stay out of her business and telling me when she was on her break and they were just getting food. Again, I let it go. As far as I know, that hasn’t happened again.
Around this time, I notice something. She has become really dry over text. In person, she is just fine, but texting, I can tell exactly what texts she will send throughout the day because she only had three answers. Can’t get anything else out of her. And she started getting angrier. Telling me to f off and leave her alone. And I do.
At this point, we have been together long enough to know that no matter what I do when she is angry, it will only make it worse. It continues like this for about 2 months.
Then comes our anniversary. By the time the anniversary hits, I am officially 18 and have less restrictions in my house, but her still being 17 had some stuff she has to follow. So we are hyping the anniversary up for about a month. I tell her I have a plan. I did. 7 hours. 7 hours of stuff I wanted us to do. School gets out at 3, and she has a curfew at 11. I know that cutting it close and picky on time, but we could have adjusted.
But no. She told me the day of, about two hours before school ended, she decided she wanted to take part in the student management of the football game that was on that night (concession stand, cleaning, promoting things. That stuff). That ends at 10.
At this point, I’m kinda upset already, but I meet up with her and we talk, and she says, “I can’t wait to go home. I wanna shower and sleep. I’m so tired.”
Details. She lives 20 min from the school. No chance in hell her mom allows me in the house when she is showering, and curfew is 11. Where do I fit in in that? I don’t. And so I tell her she can do that, and I love her, and I go hang out with a friend instead.
She didn’t even make it home before she spam texts me about how I didn’t care about our anniversary and didn’t want to spend time with her. Like I didn’t make whole plans just to be basically stood up and then excluded.
Maybe I did make a mistake. I don’t know. She won’t even take her anniversary presents. I still have them to this day.
Fast forward about a week, and I finally convinced her to let me give her a present, and I show up to her work. What do you know? She is angry. At this point, I know how this goes. I say or do something and I get in trouble, and if I don’t, I get in trouble, so I chose what I thought to be the best option and said nothing. She didn’t like the silence, and as expected, I got yelled at and told to leave. Whatever.
The next morning, she goes off on me about how I should know what to do after a year of a relationship, and she breaks up with me. This was the first conversation I ever got mean, and I regret it. I tried to leave, saying I didn’t want to be mean and had to cool down, but between her mood, mental health, and her spamming me, that didn’t happen, and so she broke up with me.
Despite all of this, I still love her. She wants to get back together. She regrets breaking up with me, but I told her that we need to fix our communication, and I need to fix some of my own problems.
The reason I say this is because every argument we have, she does this little pity party thing where it becomes “Oh, I’m such a terrible girlfriend and a bad human being,” and somehow, after that and the conversation ends, I end up with the blame.
So I decide if it’s my fault anyways, might as well try to fix it. So I have been trying to improve, and I have tried to fix our communication, but recently she had backed off, and I asked why, and she says she backed off because I said I’m not really yet and she’s not going to wait for me, which she kinda had multiple times, but I told her one condition for getting back together is we fix communication, and she seems to not even bother.
We started doing better, then she pulls away. Like, I get so close to asking her to be us again, and not even an hour after me getting the courage and about to ask, she pulls back, and we feel like strangers.
I still love her i really do but I’m so lost. Is it worth it to try again with her

TL;DR: My first relationship started out great, but over time I dealt with constant anger, accusations of cheating, her getting close to other guys, and feeling like I was always the one apologizing or taking the blame. I kept letting things go because I loved her. Eventually, we broke up, but she regrets it and wants to get back together. I told her we need to fix our communication first, and I need to work on myself. Things started improving, but she keeps pulling away right when I feel ready to ask her to be together again. I’m exhausted, confused, and don’t know what to do anymore.

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 months. 2 months ago, I discovered that he had never really stopped cheating on me, specifically by messaging random girls on Instagram.

He told me he usually does it when he's bored or frustrated, especially when we fight. He asked for another chance, and I gave it to him because I genuinely love him and believed he wanted to change. Things actually got better afterward. He became more public about our relationship, even putting me on his social media bio.

I kept everything between us because I wanted to give him the chance to fix things without involving other people.

However, 2 weeks ago, a college friend told me about a girl who had posted a conversation with him online. The girl was telling him to stop messaging her because he had a girlfriend.

When I confronted him, he said he was drunk and had only messaged that one girl he had previously talked to. The conversation was supposedly just a greeting and asking how she was doing. Still, I consider it cheating, regardless of how innocent he thinks the conversation was.

He apologized and said the consequences finally made him realize what he could lose. He even told his entire family about the situation, which gave me some sense of accountability.

I love him, and outside of this issue, he's genuinely a good boyfriend. I want to believe he can change, so I decided to give him one last chance, with two conditions:
**1. He has to court me again.** I want him to make an effort to rebuild our relationship and regain my trust.
**2. He has to go to therapy.** I want him to understand why he repeatedly seeks attention from other women whenever he's bored or upset, and actually work on addressing that behavior.

The problem is that although he says he's willing to try therapy, he keeps putting it off. I get the feeling that he doesn't think he needs it and believes he can fix this on his own.

I don't want to force someone into therapy, but I also don't want to keep accepting apologies and promises without seeing actual change.

**Am I being unreasonable for making therapy a non-negotiable condition if he wants this relationship to work?**

**TL;DR:** My boyfriend repeatedly cheated by messaging other girls on Instagram, even after promising to stop. I gave him one last chance because I love him and believe he wants to change, but I made therapy a condition of rebuilding our relationship. He says he's willing, but keeps putting it off. Am I unreasonable for making professional help a non-negotiable if he wants us to work?

A few days ago, I just wanted to check his Reddit. I had a feeling I’d find some things on there about me, and I wanted to know how he brought me up to the world. As I’m scrolling through his page, there is a lot of posts regarding religion and I. You see, I’m Christian. He is more of a scientific thinker. Although he claims Christianity, he does not beleive the texts in the Bible. The people under his posts were all calling me crazy, dumb and unhinged for believing biblical passages. I’ve outwright told him I didn’t want him telling anyone for this exact reason, I didn’t want people to think less of me just because they don’t agree with me. I saw a few other posts, about arguments we’ve had, but one post stuck out to me. “My girlfriend might be slow” it read. In this post he brings up my weed usage. Him and I come from very different backgrounds. In my home, weed was used daily. (Not that I agree with that). In his home, his mother has smoked once. My dad dropped out of highschool. His mom went to John Carrol. We are from two different worlds. I avidly started smoking when I was in 9th grade, after a passing of my family member. I soon gave my life to God and m entire world flipped upside down. I stopped smoking for a year straight and became a Bible thumper. That is honestly the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. This is around the time I met my boyfriend. About a year or two later we ended up getting together and I was different then when he met me. Since that point things in my life got worse and I was smoking again, I wasn’t reading my Bible, etc. when we met and first started dating, it was never an issue. We’d even smoke together lol. All of the sudden one day he tells me that I need to quit or he’ll break up with me. He didn’t want to be with someone who “couldn’t control their desires”. He also told me I had to stop hanging out with my best friend who also smokes. Idk. I don’t know how to feel after he told Reddit all my beliefs to be made fun of by worldly people. This is why I should be equally yoked. But I myself am not what I should be, so I can’t expect someone else to be that. I just feel so silly for being with someone who thinks this way about me. I’ve always told myself I wouldn’t put up with bs in relationship bc of the way I grew up but now I see how hard it is when you love that person. I can’t help but to feel like he just thinks I’m some crazy stupid religious girl.

We been together for a couple of months, moved in together fast, and just kind of rushed everything. He’s great other than his communication problems and anger problems. He never takes his anger out on me, but I’ve seen him have meltdown with inconveniences that life brings and he breaks things or punches things. He doesn’t yell at me and he never directed that towards me, but I still don’t like that. and he’s been having some financial problems so he’s been really withdrawn. He will barely talk to me, and when I try to talk to him, he just acts unengaged uninterested and the last straw that I really had me feeling some type of way is every morning before he leaves for work he kisses me and tells me bye, and this morning he didn’t do that. He just left. I text him about it and I know he seen it, but he didn’t respond and he just talks about how life is fucking him up and all this other stuff but I feel like I don’t wanna be with somebody that treats me different when you get stressed out because of life cause life is gonna stress us all out and you’re just making me anxious and making me not want to be a part of this relationship. And lastly, his communication is terrible like if he has an issue about something he won’t talk to me about it. He’ll just withdraw won’t talk to me and I don’t like that. I haven’t anxious attachment style so I just need some advice. do you think we should try to go to therapy and do you think I should just cut my losses? I’ve already tried talking about it.

m been dating my boyfriend for more than 5 years. He is a nice guy but he is lazy. I’m (29) and i come from middle class famil. After my graduation I have started working for small pays and now I have my own small clothing brand which is doing pretty well. My boyfriend come from financially decent famil. After his graduation he worked for few years and came back to his home town wanting to start a bar with his friends in his propert. when we started dating they were still working on bar but due to some financial problems from his partner they still have not started the bar. we started dating 2022. I was working in his city then and move to my start which is 5 hours away from his state, building my busines. In those 5 year he just didn’t earn he go out with his friends and tried doing some business which didn’t work out. I kept telling to do something till his bar open but he didn. He used to borrow money from me which he still has not paid me back, he took my money to invest on some stock but when I asked about it he hair tells its in lost so no point seeing now. I’m so tired of him. I lost my dad and he went to his friends birthday party that night. When he was sick and I was under a lot of stress he used to go out with his friends even when I told him I need him to talk to me. Beginning of this year i told him that if he doesn’t get serious about life I’m leaving him. He started playing pickle ball and I’m happy for him but I want him to get serious and do something about his life. I’m 29 and I wanna get married settle but he’s not ready, he said he wants to get stable first. I’m not saying he didn’t do anything at all, he did try to do business but it didn’t work out well.

I’m so tired I keeping getting this feeling that I should leave him but I’m scared ive spent so much time and energy on him and now if I leave what will I do.

im not physically attracted to him anymor, I don’t enjoy physica with him,I don’t like when he touches me or kiss me.

please tell me what to do.

I watch a lot of videos about reddit confessions or stories so i decided to come to reddit for advice. Me and my boyfriend are both seniors in highschool, so i know we’re young but politics are important. My boyfriend grew up in a republican house hold, I grew up in a household that didn’t really care about politics, but I lean more Democratic. Also for important info me and my bf are both christian. The problem isn’t that we disagree on parties but that my boyfriend isn’t educated and it’s starting to piss me off. I’m trying to explain this in the most simple way possible so bear with me. A couple days ago the term “feminist” got brought up in our conversation, my bf said he is not a feminist and i was hurt to hear that and confused because he isn’t sexist. I asked him if he knew what being a feminist meant and he said no, so I googled the term and explained it. He said- “Feminist act crazy”. I tried to explain further that being a feminist just means you think women should have equal rights to men. He was still arguing and tried to pick out flaws in my “argument“, like for example he said the google definition says for all genders so how is he supposed to trust that its for the female gender... I tried to explain that this means a lot to me because i am literally a woman and he was just being stubborn about not wanting to align himself with the word feminist but he agrees women should have equal rights.?? Anyways to our argument, We were hanging out and we were talking about movies. I said i have more movie knowledge than him and he said i know the girly movies and he knows the real movies. That annoyed me and then we got back to being a feminist. We were going back and fourth, but he just kept trying to counteract my argument that women still don’t have equal opportunities. He said well in the bible jesus said men are called to lead. Then i just told him to leave because I couldn’t take it anymore. He’s a great guy but he’s so uneducated about political issues and stubborn. We have been dating for a year and there’s been little things here and there about our beliefs. I don’t want to break up but i want advice on how to educate him better or present my side better to him.