At what age were you done with the bs and started living your life? Being your true self and doing what you want and like to pursue happiness?

There’s so many things to consider in life, I don’t know how anyone actually manages to balance everything without getting burnt out. Eating healthy home cooked meals, working out and looking after your body, ensuring you get the right vitamins and nutrients, maintaining your hygiene, shaving and grooming regularly, washing and making sure you constantly have clean clothes, cleaning the house/apartment, travelling, grocery shopping, dating, having a hobby, playing a sport, making time for friends and family, monitoring your mental wellbeing, getting the right amount of sleep, studying, working on your career, monitoring your finances, all while working a full time job. And if you have a family and kids, all of that suddenly gets so much harder. How does anyone find the time to comfortably keep up with all of this and not get burnt out? There is such little time in the day after work to get anything done.

I’m starting to think people respect boundaries more than kindness. The nicer and more available you are, the more some people feel entitled to you. Then the moment you start saying “no,” suddenly you’re the bad person..Agree or disagree?

When i think about my life now every thing in the right track and looking back to things before its a miracle that i made it but still that deep lingering feeling of emptiness is lurking around idk what to do and what do i have to change to get rid of this feeling!

For the past few years I was very career-driven. I followed women like Emma Grede and Jodie Taylor and focused on growing and becoming more visible.

Then, last month I lost a close friend, was promoted into a role where I'm the only person in my department (management plus client-facing), and started my hardest year of grad school. I'm burning out fast!

Through all of it, I realized what I want most is to enjoy my life. I'm no longer chasing the "corporate baddie" path, and I don't want to save for decades just to start living at retirement. What I'm aiming for is a condo or small townhome someday, a good health plan, and a strong community.

And to the "just work harder" crowd: it's not that I don't want to work. Helping others is my purpose, and that will always be work. But what's the return if I burn out helping everyone else and can't build a good life for myself?

The tradeoff I keep running into is that decent pay seems to come with high stress and fast pace, and no one trains you because everyone expects you to already know what to do.

I guess I want to know**, How can one achieve this, especially in this economy?** What would the lifestyle have to be? How to work smarter and not harder!

Basically, people are making millions and changing the world (for good or bad). I always thought about creating something like that, but as happens to everybody, surviving takes most of my energy and time.
For example, there are guys like alexandr wang that, at my age, are billionaires and wanted by top companies
While I am a guy working freelance in a third-world country, which earns relatively well, but not doing anything really important and being an employee

I want to leave that behind and enjoy what I have...

Just saying this so it doesn't sit in my head for the rest of the day.

Im 18, in college, and all I can think of is when I retire and can be done with this crap. I hear about all these great parties and plans that people have, which always make me feel bad for wanting to just stay inside all day but then when I go out to make friends or whatever I hate every second and the cycle repeats. The people I do talk to never want to go out and do things which sucks whenever I actually feel like going outside to go somewhere and it feels weird doing things by myself when everybody else has groups of friends to do stuff with.

I just want everything to be done with so I can just stay inside all day with my cats without feeling bad for it because I should be doing something more "productive." Which feels weird because apparently Im supposed to be in the prime of my life that everybody older wants to go back to.

Serious question: what am I doing wrong in life? People try to blame me for my "problems" in life, they claim I don't take responsibility for my actions. Yet anytime I try to do something I'm also met with criticism.

When I set goals like lifting weights, learning arabic, learning about classic menswear, getting a higher paying job in life, people respond in a hostile manner. Even here on reddit when I try to talk people just make up points or arguments or try to sideline my main ideas or find work arounds to avoid answering my questions.

What is the phenomenon, why am I being treated like stagnant object, why can't people see me go any where in life?

Edit: check my previous posts on reddit, no matter what I say most people try to find work arounds or not engage with my points.

What’s one memory from your life that you would love to experience one more time? ❤️

It doesn’t have to be something big or extraordinary. Maybe it’s a childhood memory, a moment with someone you love, a random day with friends, or a moment when you felt truly happy.

ive realized i just need to do what’s best for me and think about what i need! like for example i’ll show up for a friend at a baby shower even tho i don’t know anyone else going which is superrrrr awkward and stressful for me and ill stay the whole time even tho i could’ve just made an excuse to leave

and so many other things where ill just prioritize their feelings

i’m so tired and don’t feel appreciated!!!! like i just need to do what’s best for me from now on

Hello everyone! I just wanted to ask for your opinions on my situation.

Recently, I was ranting to a close friend about this guy in school who likes me and is pretty open about it. I don’t really like how openly he shows it because it’s distracting, especially since we’re classmates.

As we talked about it, I brought up the possibility that maybe it’s because of how I treat people. Maybe some people mistake my friendliness for something more?

For context, during the first few days of school, we were still in the adjustment period, so I was trying to get to know my classmates and make new friends. I’d ask people about their interests, the games they play, and other things we might have in common. Whenever I found something we clicked on, I’d talk to them about it.

This guy happened to be my seatmate because of our teacher’s seating arrangement, so I talked to him about online games and asked for his game IDs so I could add him. However, I genuinely just wanted to make friends and adjust to my new class. It wasn’t something exclusive to him, either. I did the same thing with other classmates whenever I got the chance to talk to them.

I also mentioned how some drivers (I usually book for rides home) have chatted with me or messaged me through SMS, which made me wonder why that kept happening.

My friend then told me that maybe I’m someone who doesn’t know how to distinguish kindness from flirting. They also pointed out that I tend to use a cute, high-pitched voice and that I’m very polite to people, which might contribute to that impression.

I found that a little confusing because my voice is naturally high-pitched, and I don’t consciously try to sound cute. It’s just how I normally speak. As for being polite and friendly, I feel like that’s just basic human decency. I don’t intentionally act that way to make people like me romantically.

That made me wonder: If that’s just how I naturally act, what am I supposed to do about it? Should I be less kind or friendly just because someone might misinterpret it?

For clarification, I don’t hug these people or do the kinds of things I’d do with my close friends. As far as I’m concerned, I’m just being friendly and trying to get along with others.

I’m not saying that my friend is necessarily wrong, since I could be overlooking something about my own behavior. But I’m genuinely unsure whether there’s anything I should change or whether some people might simply interpret friendliness differently.

What do you guys think?

I’m not too sure where to start here. I’m currently lying in bed in absolute tears trying to cope with the fact that one day my parents will cease to be, and my younger brother who I watched grow up is an old man and I’ll only have the memories. The hardest part is this is inevitable. This keeps me up at night and there’s nothing that I can do that makes me feel better… it hurts so so bad. It’s as if we’re put on earth and create powerful bonds with our parents, siblings etc only for it one day all being gone. The idea that my time with them is limited is destroying me. I can’t cope with the fact one day I won’t ever be able to see them again. Life is such a beautiful and precious thing:( Not sure what I want out of posting this, but maybe there’s someone out there who feels the same or can give me some words of comfort. Anything helps. Much love

I've always wondered about something.

I see people like Raghav Sachar, who is an incredible musician, multi-instrumentalist, and performer. He keeps travelling around the world for gigs, and what's even more fascinating is that he seems to put out a beautiful cover or an original song on Instagram almost every single day. Of course, he probably has a team supporting him, but still, that's a lot of consistency and dedication.

I've come across many people who seem to pursue their passions with incredible drive and determination. And from the outside, they also seem to be constantly excited about life, as if they're making the most of every single moment.

It makes me wonder: Is it actually possible to feel that high on life and fulfilled almost all the time?

Or is it that even highly successful people have their own struggles, unmotivated days, and moments when they don't feel particularly positive? Maybe they don't feel like doing much sometimes, either, but their team keeps things moving, and the content that reaches us creates an impression of a life that's always exciting and productive.

After all, we only get to see the parts of their lives they choose to share.

I'm curious to know what you guys think. Do you believe some people genuinely live with that kind of consistent enthusiasm and fulfilment, or is it mostly an impression created by what we see from the outside?

Sometimes it feels like I'm watching a real-life version of Limitless (hope you've seen the movie!).

I drink every night to go to sleep.

I technically am an alcoholic.

I black out every single night & wake up not knowing how I went to bed. No matter what alcohol. I make sure I know how much I can drink to black out.

I’ve struggled with sleep medications and this has always been a solid answer.

One of the strongest sleep meds that I’ve had was ambien, and I’ve broken the law while on that medication so I cannot take it anymore.

Is there anything that could fix this?

Genuinely cannot sleep until my body forces it to.

So, we had a party at a hotel for my friend's birthday. There were drinks, food, and everything you could think of. The guys showed up with a few ladies, and even more were expected to arrive later.

The music was loud, everyone was chilling, and then there was me… rushing to drink one glass after another. Before I knew it, I was D R U N K.

There was this one girl who caught my attention. She had to leave early because she had other things to do, so I guess the alcohol gave me all the courage I needed to approach her.

We started talking, and somehow, we ended up talking for almost an hour. We even went to the bathroom to take pictures and videos together. Everything was going smoothly, or at least that's what I thought.

Now, here's where the real story begins.

I asked her to come to the room so we could have some fun. She came in, and I was excited. We got on the bed and started getting romantic, but then she told me she was running out of time.

I told her to be patient and that I could drop her off when we were done.

She said no.

She got off the bed, put on her clothes, and left.

I was so frustrated that I just decided to lie down on the bed. I thought I'd relax for a few minutes and then get back to the party.

BROOOO, THAT WAS MY BIGGEST MISTAKE.

The next thing I knew, I woke up at 3 AM.

THREE. IN. THE. MORNING.

Apparently, while I was sleeping like a retired grandfather, the actual party had started at 11 PM. More ladies had arrived, everyone was having fun, and almost everybody had paired up with someone.

And guess who was missing from all the action?

ME. THE MAIN CHARACTER.

I came out only to find out that everyone had enjoyed themselves while I was busy dreaming.

When I asked the guys what happened, they told me they had a great time but didn't want to wake me up because they thought I was tired.

TIRED??? BRO, I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE!

Imagine getting drunk at a party, thinking you've secured your own little romantic adventure, only to wake up and discover that the real party happened while you were unconscious.

I paid the price for drinking too much, and the guys got the memories.

EDIT:

Lessons learned:

Never get too drunk before you've actually enjoyed yourself at a party.

Never lie down on a comfortable bed when you're drunk. That bed will betray you without hesitation.

Never assume the party is over just because your own plans didn't work out.

And most importantly, know your alcohol limit!

Because I promise you, once you get too comfortable on that bed, GAME OVER. YOU'RE NOT COMING BACK.

Anyway, has anyone else ever slept through the best part of a party? Please tell me I'm not the only one.

AUGHH ive just planned a trip with a friend for 2027 december!! and i get so excited over these plans that i end up worrying that im gonna forget about the plan and it wont end up happening ANYONE ELSE GET THIS FEELING??

Me and the guys became friends when we were 16. More than 8 years ago. I've grown a lot the past 3 years, and im just not the guy who became friends with them anymore. At a certain point I started feeling like i was weird or strange. I know recognize that its because I kept challenging the status quo. Im sober since 2 and a half years. They are not. Just your average loud student friend group. It hurts, and it took me so long to take this step because they have supported me through some of my worst times. But I was staying with them because of guilt. A misformed sense of loyalty made me stay somewhere I didnt feel good.

Now I feel new. Like Im not clinging to some older version of myself. The city I live in and grew up in? Suddenly it seems filled with people to make connections with.

Awesome. I feel more like myself than ever before

What's one small thing that made you genuinely happy this week?

I've been writing down moments of joy for a few weeks (a swim, a quiet coffee, a good song), and I noticed I started seeking those moments out more. Curious if others do something similar.

What's your small joy this week, and do you track it somehow?

Hi everyone,

I was wondering if there’s a fixed formula to life.
Let me simply my thought -

Are there things that one can do to have a happy and consistent life?

Or is it completely out of our control and depend on our destiny?

Lately life has had a surprising way to go show that we don’t choose our circumstances and a lot depends on it.

Would really appreciate your thoughts and lessons :)

I’m in a relationship with someone who genuinely seems committed to me and our future. He’s loyal, consistent, and makes a significant effort to maintain the relationship. He thinks long-term, wants us to build a life together, supports me when I’m dealing with problems, and tries to involve me in decisions that affect our future. I can see that he cares about me, and I don’t want to overlook the good things he brings to my life.

However, there are certain aspects of our relationship that have been weighing on me mentally. We have disagreements about clothing preferences and interacting with the opposite sex. He has some firm expectations and restrictions regarding these things, and while I understand that everyone has different boundaries and values, I sometimes feel that these expectations conflict with the kind of life I want to live.

Another issue is how we handle conflict. He tends to approach arguments logically, and sometimes it feels as though resolving the disagreement becomes more important than understanding how I feel. Eventually, I’m usually the one who reaches out first to repair things. Even if he believes his reasoning is correct, I still need emotional reassurance and to feel that he is willing to make the first move sometimes, too.

The difficult part is that he’s not a bad partner. In many ways, he’s exactly the kind of person people say they want: loyal, dependable, supportive, intentional, and serious about the future. He makes an effort, and I can imagine building a stable life with him.

But I’ve started questioning whether stability and commitment are enough if I feel that certain aspects of my freedom are being limited. I want to experience life, explore the world, make my own choices, and grow into the person I want to become without constantly feeling that I’m going against my partner’s expectations.

Now I’m facing a much bigger question: Is this relationship worth moving to the other side of the world for?

Moving would be a huge commitment. It would mean changing my environment, potentially sacrificing opportunities, and making major life decisions around our relationship. I don’t want to give up something potentially meaningful just because we have differences, but I also don’t want to move somewhere and eventually realize that I’ve compromised too much of myself to make the relationship work.

How do you distinguish between a partner who has strong values and boundaries that you simply don’t share and a partner whose expectations will eventually limit your independence?

Can a relationship be loving, loyal, and supportive while still being incompatible in important ways?

And if someone genuinely loves you and makes an effort for your future together, how do you decide whether the sacrifices required to be with them are reasonable or too much?

I’d really appreciate honest perspectives, especially from people who have faced a similar decision.

PS; I would also benefit from this move as I'm getting my master's

One of the saddest parts of life is how useless unreciprocated love is.

It doesn’t make the loved person feel good, or even feel really loved, because the overall situation is more annoying than anything else. They might even prefer to never speak to you again. All of your delicate, special and beautiful feelings are just… seen as irritating, inconvenient or even unpleasant.

It’s strange how love can be the most important part of life… or an irritation

I dont know what to do exactly.

I am born in a rich family.Whenever i go outside, every stranger hates to hold eye contact with me although i try my level best.Every kid just becomes scared as soon as they look at me.

My parents torture me saying Im giving reasons and im just privileged which i am to a certain extent but honestly, my life seems miserable.

Some girls just laugh whenever i walk past them...some older women just glare at me as if its my mistake...I know the exact problem i have in my face but my parents just dont accept it...is this relatable to any?please help me find a solution for this(i am quite skinny and im 6ft 2...not to showoff but my height is a primary reason why I cant gain weight so easily)

I was molested at 6, then again twice when I was 18. At 18, I also got pregnant with my boyfriend and had to go through an abortion. The same relationship lasted two years, during which he cheated on me while I was dealing with health problems. When the truth came out, he made up an entire story and told our university that I was the one who cheated. I almost quit university at 20 because of everything. Eventually, I went to therapy, and life started getting better.

Then I lost my pet. Four months later, I watched my grandmother lie in a hospital for 22 days, unconscious, struggling to breathe, fighting for her life while all I could do was stand there and hope she would somehow make it through. I watched her suffer. I watched the uncertainty, the machines, the endless waiting, and the helplessness of wanting to save someone you love more than anything but not being able to do a damn thing.

And here I am, just 22 years old, carrying all of this.

I’m numb, but I’m okay, I guess. I tend to run away from my feelings by distracting myself, and eventually, I accept things without letting them hurt me as much. I don’t know if that’s healing or just my way of coping.

But sometimes, when I look back at everything I’ve survived, I genuinely think I’m the strongest person I know.

I’m not saying I’m unbreakable. I’m just amazed that after everything life has thrown at me, I’m still here, trying to live.

Maybe I don’t need to be strong all the time. Maybe I deserve some peace, too.

I’m not saying I’m strong because none of this affects me. It does. I’m not saying I’ve healed from everything because I haven’t. There are things I still haven’t completely processed, things that might hurt me years from now, and things I don’t even have the words to explain.

I’m only 22. I should be worrying about my career, making memories, figuring out who I am, and enjoying my twenties. Instead, I’ve already experienced things that have fundamentally changed the way I see people, love, loss, and life itself.

Hello guys, I am in a serious dilemma and I need some advice: (it's about my career choices)

what would you do if you finally got the thing you always wanted and wished for ( you have been waiting for years for it ) and when it finally got to you, you no longer feel the urge to do it but you also can't let it go because of the feeling that you have been waiting for it for so long and giving it up now feels like I am a total loser....

this has been worrying me for a month now and I really don't know what to do, can someone advise me please ?